[M-A-G]

SmackDown!: November 9, 2040

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Hotbody claims that his phone has been ringing off the hook from offers to challenge for his Cruiserweight Title. There are just so many potential victims to choose from. Sadly, Hotbody had to take notice of the fact that El Dandy was NOT one of the people stepping forward. He's in a tag team, isn't he? Him and his old lady? Nevertheless, as El Dandy continues to deny giving the people the epic of a lifetime, Hotbody has a lot of thinking to do. He can obviously ignore Gavin Jones. He was way out of line on Monday when he had the arrogance to make demands of Michael Hotbody. His misfortunes aren't Hotbody's problem. Hotbody has enough problems on his plate and that includes trying to find decent grub in this miserable Louisiana town. Why does everything have to be so damn spicy here? He may be Michael Hotbody but there are limits to what even he can tolerate! And what the hell is the thought process behind gumbo and jambalaya anyway? You just toss in whatever is in a 6-foot radius around the pot? Hotbody needs the proper food intake to keep up his intense training regimen that allows him to be the greatest Cruiserweight Champion in the company's history. Do you think he got all of those accomplishments that appear before his name by eating this kind of sludge? No, the quicker Hotbody can get out of here, the better. He has work to do and it can't get accomplished sticking around this place any longer than he has to!

This calls for someone to interrupt these proceedings. And it's Lyle Morris of all people??? Well he is a Louisiana boy. He enters the ring and gets in the face of Hotbody. Lyle declares that Louisiana isn't the problem. The problem is Michael Hotbody isn't enough of a man to handle the way they do things here. But then again, that's been Hotbody's trademark for the last year, hasn't it? Not being a man about things and spending all his time crying about everything.

Hotbody is taken back at these comments and demands to know just who the hell Lyle Morris thinks he is talking this way! Lyle brings up the point that Hotbody is looking for a challenger for the Cruiserweight Title and if people will recall, Lyle Morris was part of probably one of the best matches at WrestleMania when he competed for that belt. And, of course, let's not forget the fact that Hotbody is looking for someone who's part of a tag team. Add all of that up and it shouldn't take a genius to figure out what Lyle's business here is.

Hotbody looks like he's trying to hold in a laugh. "Oh, you can't be serious, right? Sorry, what exactly have you done to even consider thinking about asking for this opportunity? WrestleMania might as well be a lifetime ago. Besides, you're not in a tag team either considering your other half has been spending the last few months..."

"DON'T GO THERE!" Lyle interrupts. "Chet is more of a man than you'll ever be and he'll prove it by getting past all of what's happened to him. Of course, you can prove me wrong by giving me that title shot."

"Um, OK. Let me think about it...NO! And you want to know why? Chet is in no way a real man because your cousin's going to show up, join up with you again, and then get reminded about why he went to where is right now in the first place!"

That's enough to cause Lyle to snap and he nails Hotbody and the champion goes down. Lyle goes into the mount and gets in some more shots before Hotbody manages to shove him off and take his belt and run away. Hotbody just can't seem to stop making friends.

Backstage, we see that Brooke is arriving with Salvatore Scabbia and Ronnie Costello. Our crack interview team tries getting a word with them and Brooke claims that they're here to set a few things straight with the Academy. Oh, boy, did they make the stupidest mistake they could've made last night. Those two ingrates are going to bite her hand? After everything they've been through? After everything she's done for them? And especially with the mood Scabbia has been in? Randy Ellis and Justin Mitchell are NOT leaving this arena tonight under their own power!

First Match: Alexander Piero and The Wyldhearts vs. Jerome McDougall and the Millennium Rebels
Madison gets on the mic and says that this lovely reunion of her and her clients has been a long time coming and she couldn't be prouder of all of them. The Wyldhearts are in prime position to become the next Unified Tag Team Champions and Piero did nothing but carry the torch for her while she was gone. It's time to start to giving out as much as they've been taking. This match is 6-man goodness as you can imagine. Aaron Ramsey has himself a good crew under his watch but they have a role to serve here in putting over Madison's crew. Piero manages to hit Sammy Brady with the Flashpoint and picks up the win for the faces. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Second Match: Eddy Clash vs. Brandon Reigns???
Clash is on the mic and makes the declaration that he should be facing Brandon Reigns here tonight right now. After all, Reigns said that Survivor Series wasn't the stage for it so Eddy figured a change of stage would lead to Reigns changing his mind. The venue isn't so important as much as being able to kick Brandon's ass. Surely a change of scenery will be enough to convince Reigns to answer the challenge and step into this ring tonight, right?

We get no response for a good while despite Clash's repeated attempts. Finally, the music of Orlando Kincaid hits and the man himself steps out and begins making his way down to the ring. Orlando calls Eddy pathetic and a bonafide idiot. He needs to be able to take a hint. It's fairly obvious that time and place isn't what actually matters to Brandon Reigns. Eddy Clash himself is the thing that makes it not worth it. On the bright side, Kincaid doesn't really have much to do tonight and since he's still on his big initiative kick he started last night, Kincaid will happily take the place of Brandon Reigns tonight. Eddy Clash gives his approval to the ref and so we get...

Second Match: Eddy Clash vs. Orlando Kincaid
More good shit here. Clash shows a pretty awesome big man game as Kincaid does his best to outwit him. Kincaid tries taking a breather by rolling to the outside and retreating up the ramp a bit but Ryan Pattillo decides to make himself known, looking upset as all hell over what Kincaid last night. Kincaid backs up towards the ring and gets grabbed by Clash. Clash brings him in by one hand and chucks him back into the ring. Kincaid decides to hell with all of this and crawls out the other way and decides to make his escape via the crowd while shouting at Ryan Pattillo. Clash gets the countout win here. No Reigns, though. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Third Match: The Academy vs. The Sin City Rollers
Randy and Justin want to talk about what they did last night. They just about had it up to here with all of the noise that comes out of Brooke's mouth when she's out here flapping her gums. Brooke put everybody else that wasn't Salvatore Scabbia on the backburner in order to focus only making sure he won the Unified World Title. Well, look at where we are now and what does she have to show for it? And she's going to get on the Academy's case for not stepping in line? The Academy followed Brooke through thick and thin but they've got their limits. Week in and week out, if it wasn't one thing, it was another. Now supposedly, Scabbia and Costello are here all full of angry vigor. The Academy isn't afraid because they actually had the balls to stop being Brooke's errand boys. So this match is all about establishing the Academy as faces. It's a role I don't think I ever would have given them but we got to do what we can to mix things up, no? Ortega falls victim to the PHD from the Academy and the pin is, well, academic after that. Post match, Brooke attempts to make good on her promise by sending Scabbia and Costello after her former clients and we have ourselves a brawl! It's a pier six affair and we need officials to get things under control! *****, 94% overall.

Backstage, we are all blessed to hear from the Lonely Girls, Jenna Kyle and Faith Connors. To say their disappointed with the turn of events surrounding the Women's Tag Team Titles is an understatement. They didn't go through hell this entire year to have things end up the way they are now. The two of them have been going over when they think they should exercise their rematch clause to challenge Hannah and Bobbi Jo for the belts. Whenever it does happen, all they ask is that Leah and Bonnie Beckham stay out of the way. They can get a piece when it's all said and done, they have their word on it.

Also backstage, Ozzy Mandias wants to clear the air regarding what's going on between him and Martyn LaSalle. Ozzy is big enough to admit that he made a mistake on Raw when he elbowed Martyn in the face. See? That wasn't so hard. So why is it so difficult for Martyn to own up to his mistake at No Mercy when he screwed up and basically let Michael Hotbody walk out still the Cruiserweight Champion. Ozzy is a patient guy but the longer this goes on without any sort of apology from Martyn the more ridiculous this gets. And Ozzy has no tolerance for the ridiculous.

Fourth Match: Clubber Harris vs. L.A. Xander
I'm gettis Harris involved in Survivor Series so I gotta give him some shine. I forsee a little feud with another big beefy monster on the roster. Should be good. Just like this match. Harris hits the Club Pain after a strong showing and gets the win. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fifth Match: Neil Quint vs. Zachary Vale
Can't forget about the quintessential Neil Quint match on my shows. It's a cheap way to steal a good rating to help with the overall average. This is good little cleanser after the big man display in the previous match. Quint comes off the top with the Quint-Essential Top Rope Maneuver to score the pin. ****1/2, 88% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Kyle Jacobs. Kyle wants to make things as simple as possible. He wants to settle things with Xavier Cross, one way or another. He's not asking for much. He just wants the opportunity to get Cross's blood all over his fists. He just wants to kick Cross's teeth in. He just wants to drag Cross's useless sack of meat from corner to corner all over this ring and take a leak on his broken body. Is that so much to ask for? And to think we ended up here all because Cross wasn't going to stand a blow to his precious ego. Well, if he doesn't want to suffer humiliation, he'll just have to flat out suffer and while Kyle hasn't been keen on going down that road, he's certainly willing to learn for Cross's sake.

Cue Chris Collins who wants to interrupt these proceedings. Collins thinks that all of these people coming back and making these outrageous claims and calls for revenge is getting out of hand. They can't all get what they want. Collins himself is having to hear this garbage from Madison and her little pet, Alexander Piero, so you can imagine he's not too thrilled having to hear it from some entitled little piss ant like Kyle Jacobs. Collins wants to tell Kyle, one second-generation star to another, a name is just a name. Actions are what matters so Kyle needs to pick his battles more carefully. Kyle wonders if Collins is looking to pick a battle right now. Seeing as Cross doesn't seem like he's willing to show up and take his medicine, Kyle is willing to take a substitute.

We get a staredown between the two but Xavier Cross uses this chance to sneak up from behind Kyle and knock him down! Well this doesn't look good for Kyle. It's a two-on-one scenario as Kyle is beaten down and he ultimately gets laid out after taking the Fall From Heaven from Collins and Cross puts the exclamation point on it all with the Cross Cutter. Well this is certainly not over to say the least.

MAIN EVENT: Wrakk and Quentin McDaniels vs. Haven and Seth Von Kamp
So we've got the two title matches at Survivor Series hooking up here. The heat is fucking great so I can only hope Survivor Series doesn't end up being a fucking DUD show. Seth and Quentin handle most of the load as they're probably the best workers of the group. Wrakk and Haven are really just the big kaiju scene at the climax of the movie. I'm not keen on having anybody job here so we'll just go the double countout route as Wrakk and Haven just forget about formalities and slug it out to their hearts content. Quentin decides to be a dick and lays out Seth with the Great Depression after all is said and done and he stands tall. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%