[M-A-G]

SmackDown!: December 14, 2040

Let's see if I can get back on schedule here.

Opening Match: Ziggy Styles vs. Stone Walsh
Ziggy takes the mic and declares that he feels a great deal of sadness and pity for people who don't have it in them to get Ziggy with it. Those people cling on ever so desperately to their darkness and failures and it ruins them! Take Michael Haywood for instance. The destruction of his little group was no one else's fault but his own, and now he thinks that gives him leeway to just be a big meanie to everyone! To the credit of his former teammates, Ryan Pattillo has a chance to become the new Unified World Champion come Bragging Rights, and Gavin Jones also has a championship opportunity at the same event! What's Michael been doing? He's been nothing but a sour puss! "I've only been trying to help! But I am not without mercy and generosity. I am offering Michael his own day in the sun by challenging him to face me next week! It's high time we put this business of ours to rest and see what is more powerful here in the WWE: your cancerous negativity or the positive energy that is the Zig-Meister!" Ziggy's stupidity aside, this is a banger of an opener. Walsh is someone else who should be in a better position considering his attributes, but alas, he has to play the role of making this doofus look good here. The top turnbuckle in one corner gets exposed by Ziggy during the match and it comes to into play in the end as Ziggy escapes an attempt at the Stone Cutter from Walsh. He slips behind Walsh and yanks him into the exposed steel and catches Walsh in a small package off the rebound to score the pin. No time for celebration as HERE COMES MICHAEL HAYWOOD after the match to help Ziggy get his steps in for the day and chase him and the two go off into the night through the crowd. *****, 94% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Hotbody gets on the mic as he wants to talk about Gavin Jones. "Ladies and gentlemen, if there was ever a time when I needed your support and well wishes, it is definitely now. The thought of a degenerate holding this Cruiserweight Title quite frankly makes me a little nervous. Gavin Jones, last week you defiled the beautiful Slammys that I and Madison EARNED! You're lucky none of them were scratched otherwise you would've been hit with a lawsuit from Galino & Farnes so hard you'd think you were hit by a bus! But Gavin is just the latest in a long line of people who want to take away the things that I have worked so hard to obtain, and he thinks he can do it by being an annoyance and a punk. Well, if there's one thing that I can't stand, it's a goof! I will absolutely not tolerate silliness while I'm the champion, and the amount of arrogance that you have, Gavin, in thinking that you of all people are going to be one to end the year that was Michael Hotbody is a clown show! But the thing is, I don't fear clowns. I punch them in their stupid noses and stomp their teeth in. The time for funny business is over, Gavin, because you're not going to be laughing come Bragging Rights. When it's all said and done, the term "tears of a clown" will never be more appropriate!"

This calls for the number one contender himself to interrupt the show and make himself a guest. Gavin Jones steps into the ring with a mic and gets in Hotbody's face. "You know, you can run me down about goofing off, but if you'd been paying attention to me and all of the Hunters, you'd know that when something serious like gold is on the line, we all get serious about that business. And you? Your big claim to fame when the going gets tough is to whine and find an excuse to explain why you're not a man."

"Hey! Who the hell do..."

"NO, THIS IS WHERE YOU ZIP IT!" Gavin explodes. "90% of your entire God damn career here ever since you showed up is you flapping those gums of yours! So right now, you don't get to speak. You've done enough talking! You're going to stand there and listen and you had better listen good! Every cheap shot you take at me, that's one body part of yours I'm going to break at Bragging Rights. Every insult you throw towards my former teammates, that's another body part I'm going to break at Bragging Rights. Every dumb tactic you might try to get out of this, well, hell, I won't wait until Bragging Rights to break something. You think me a clown? Well, that's going to be one hell of a boot shoved up your ass. Keep your Slammys. Keep that jezebel of yours. Keep your stupid lawyers. Keep that big dumb oaf. I hope they all provide you comfort when I take that Cruiserweight Title from you!"

With that, Gavin shoves his microphone into Hotbody and makes his way to leave the ring, but Hotbody isn't phased by the words we all just heard and takes offense to it all and makes the decision to jump Gavin from behind. He stomps on Gavin a couple of times, screaming at Gavin and asking him who the hell he think he is. He tries going for a Hot Ticket, but Gavin grabs Hotbody's leg and latches on. Hotbody panics and kicks away with his free leg and bails once he's free. Gavin glares at the champion as the latter makes his escape.

Second Match: Leah vs. Cordelia Capriati
Cordelia has Brooke with her, but she doesn't look particularly thrilled about it. Leah may have business with the Southern Belles come Bragging Rights, but she's all focused here and shit. This is another fucking sweet women's encounter, with some good back and forth shit. Sadly, it has to get ruined by Hannah McCormick who is looking to ruin things for Leah. Leah tries a Sultry Splash, but Hannah pulls the rope causing Leah to slip and tumble. That's going to be a DQ. Hannah slips into the ring and looks to get her some of Leah. Cordelia recovers and is understandably miffed at this turn of events and spins Hannah around to get in her face. The two argue for a bit, but Brooke hops up on the apron and tries to reason with Cordelia, beckoning her to just back off and let it go and take her leave. Cordelia turns around and starts to leave, but Leah is back up on her feet and drop kicks Hannah into Cordelia. Cordelia responds by turning around and knocking Hannah down with a forearm! She must've though Hannah pushed her on purpose! Leah grabs Hannah and tosses her out of the ring. Brooke is incredulous as it looks like she's losing more and more control over her ranks. ****1/2, 87% overall.

Third Match: Neil Quint vs. Johnny Dangerson
Gotta keep Neil's momentum going. He's already trounced Sammy Brady. Let's see how he fares against his more experienced tag team partner. Johnny may have the better name, but his future isn't as bright as other people on the roster. Case in point, Neil has Johnny down and set up for the Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver. Sammy Brady slides in and covers Johnny's prone body and tries to call off Neil from executing the move. Neil says "Fuck it" and comes off with the move anyway on both men and that's going to be enough to give Neil the victory via pinfall. ****1/4, 89% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as we're joined by the Woman of the Year, the WWE Women's Champion Sonya Braddock! She brings up the year that she had and how she was looking forward to bringing closure to it all. "That closure would've come by getting a chance to once again make Naomi Bailey my bitch and knocking her ass out. I was actually on board with her complaining and lobbying because it was going to make it all the more sweet when I still walked away from that fight with this belt on my shoulder. Now, Naomi isn't cleared to compete, but in a way I've got something even better lined up come Bragging Rights. I've got Jenna Kyle. And while Naomi's humiliating defeat would satisfy me because I'd be destroying a big mouthed pretender to my throne, beating Jenna Kyle is a whole other beast. You see, Jenna, you're one of the few women who has managed to elude utter destruction at my hand. And look at all you managed to acheive. You racked up 3 Slammy wins for some of the biggest historical moments this year alone. As Woman of the Year, and as the WWE Women's Champion, what kind of person would I be if I let all of that go unchallenged. You're the unicorn, Jenna. You are just the thing that's going to help put a nice bow on this year. Everyone will be able to take a step back and look at that package and they'll be able to say that Sonya Braddock made that and she made it because she was the best. It's nothing personal, Jenna, but you know how things go. And upsetting you will be just the message I need to be sent to Naomi to let her know what's waiting for her when she's ready to go another round."

Well, like before with Hotbody and Gavin, this is the time for the number one contender to come on out here and give their take on the matter. Jenna Kyle comes on down and shows no fear getting into the ring with Braddock as she takes the mic.

"Let's clear up a misconception you seem to have, Sonya. I am not now nor will I ever be made a stepping stone or an example. I am a 3 time Women's Champion. I am a two time, back-to-back Queen of the Ring winner. I made history with Faith Connors by being part of the first team to capture the Women's Tag Team Titles. So, yeah, getting one over on me would be a pretty big deal. Which is why you're going to have such a hard time pulling it off. I promise you right here and now, if you walk into Bragging Rights thinking you've got it in the bag, your hopes of ever getting that chance to humilitate Naomi are dead before you even climb in between the ropes. I'm on my own path towards redemption, Sonya, so I hope you understand that it also isn't personal and that you don't take it as such when I take that title for the fourth time."

Sonya smirks as she circles Jenna while making her retort. "If I say you're a stepping stone, then a stepping stone is what you'll be. Everyone eventually gets crushed. But you don't need to take my word for it. The next time you have yourself a heart to heart with your pal Faith, I want you to ask her yourself how things went for her earlier this year. In fact, if things had gone even worse, you probably wouldn't have had someone to call a partner. I believe you when you say that you're not going to make things easy for me, but unless you've grown more vicious, unless you're willing to go to that dark place in your mind, and unless you've grown a stomach for the unpleasant, you don't have a prayer at Bragging Rights. Take solace in what you have managed to accomplish, Jenna. Let that be more than enough."

Jenna steps up to Sonya and looks the champion in the eye. "Until I get that title off of you, Sonya, it's never going to be enough. I'll see you at Bragging Rights." And with that we go to break as the two women stare each other down.

Fourth Match: The Royal Effect vs. The Tokyo Titans
The Royal Effect are, of course, due their rematch for the Unified Tag Team Titles, something we're all looking forward to. They have their Slammys with them and they take the time to remind the audience that they won the award for Tag Team of the Year because they are just too damn good to ignore. They are making it their new year's resolution to start the next year as the champions! The dislike between the two members of the face team has no noticable effect on the match as things are cooking. Things break down as it's BONZO GONZO and Wu and McKay are the legal men with Kavovit and Tokyo Kid fighting on the outside. The ref is distracted with the outside brawl and he goes out to check on Wu when Kavovit sends him into the steps. Kavovit slips McKay one of the Slammy awards while the ref is busy and McKay clobbers Wu with it. Kavovit informs the ref of the pinfall attempt and the shenanigans lead to the three count giving the Royal Effect another win. *****, 96% overall.

To the back we go as we see Jake Connelly waiting on his clients for the next match when Cameron Harper steps up to him. Jake looks confused as to Cameron's presence and asks him what he's doing here seeing as Jake didn't arrange a match for Cameron. Cameron says that he's here to continue showing his gratitude and loyalty to the Jake Connelly brand and he wants to lend a hand in any way he can. After all, Zoey and Katie are also his fellow clients so he should be working with them, too. Connelly says that he appreciates the gesture, but after the last couple of outings with Ethan Lang, Cameron might need a bit more seasoning with him before branching out. Cameron should consider it a hard rule with Connelly, in that if you're not booked, you're not needed. Connelly has got this covered. Cameron looks dejected, but he says that he understands and apologizes for stepping out of bounds. He wishes Connelly luck and takes his leave.

Fifth Match: The Lady Liberties vs. The Brooklyn Sisterhood
Zoey and Katie have themselves quite the test here with the monstrous veterans in Billie Padgett and Emma Edwards. Fortunately, Jake Connelly is behind them as their manager and mentor. Nothing can wrong! Right? Well, after a pretty cool underdog vs. monster match, things boil down to Billie and Katie. Cameron Harper decides his fellow clients are in need of his assistance despite what Connelly said earlier and comes on down and hops up on the apron to play cheerleader. Connelly is confused as all fuck and goes over to talk him down. Katie escapes an attempt from Billie at the Red Hook and she tries to run off the ropes for her next move but stops when she sees Cameron in the way. She's just as puzzled as everyone else but Cameron continues to encourage her. Billie comes up from behind and shoves Katie into Cameron, knocking him off, and that allows Billie to hit the Red Hook and give the Sisterhood the pin. That's actually their first loss since coming under the wing of Connelly. Speaking of which, he doesn't look too thrilled with Cameron's actions. ****1/2, 89% overall.

PROMO TIME as the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk feels the need to address his upcoming match with Ryan Pattillo. He tells Pattillo that the two of them have had this dance before and it didn't end so well for Pattillo. He asks us all to think about the fact that the previous encounter between the two of them didn't even have the belts on the line and Wrakk was STILL willing to brutalize Pattillo beyond belief. Just imagine what's in store for Bragging Rights now that that piece of crap is daring to try to take away the one thing that Wrakk thought about day in and day out for that entire year that was stolen from him. Ryan is trying his best to lash out at the cruel, cruel world that had forgotten him and do what he can to right what he perceives as wrongs. Wrakk can emphathize somewhat, but none of that is Wrakk's fault or problem. Now the embarrassment that Ryan is going to suffer at Bragging Rights? Well, that's going to be all Wrakk's fault and he's going to laugh about it. Wrakk has come too far to let it get taken away. And as far as Brandon Reigns goes? That moment of vulnerability on Raw is something he should remember for the rest of his life, because Reigns is never going to have another opportunity like that again. Not while Wrakk is the WWE Unified World Champion.

Sixth Match: Eddy Clash vs. Chet Morris
Good to get Eddy back into the thick of things. He's really had a roller coaster of a time since his debut. I didn't really think of sticking him where I'm going to stick him for Bragging Rights. Oops. Got to save that bit for later. Anyways, Eddy is out for revenge and he's his usual monstrous self, but Chet isn't going down easy. It's an awesome brawl, but Eddy gets Chet set up for the Thunderstrike and that's going to cause Hugo to slide in to save Chet by attacking Eddy for the DQ. It looks like we're going to get another beatdown BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT!!! Everyone freaks out and when they come back on Haven is in front of Quinten McDaniels in the aisle and he takes him out with a choke slam. He then slides into the ring to even things up. Things start to look bad as Haven looks like he can't do much against Hugo and the latter starts to hammer the Dark Shepherd silly in retaliation. Haven goes down in the corner and looks like he's toast, but Eddy disposes of Chet and just rams his entire body into Hugo knocking the big man through the ropes and to the outside. He runs out to the timekeeper's area to grab a chair and slides back in to ward off the heels. It looks like Haven has himself an ally in this battle. But three on two hardly seems fair. Hmmmm.... ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Seth Von Kamp and Kyle Jacobs vs. Chris Collins and Xavier Cross
Kyle Jacobs declares that he's ready to go against Xavier anytime he wants to put pen to paper. What happened to Cross at Survivor Series was unfortunate, but he shouldn't have signed up if he was going to whine about the outcome. Kyle says that he would've much preferred going one-on-one with Cross and he can't think of any reason why that can't happen now, other than Cross not being as bold as he wants us to believe. "So name the time and place, Cross, and I'll finish what I started all that time ago." This is one excellent choice for a main event as the rating shows. It breaks down and Seth and Collins are the legal men. The ref tries to get things back in control with Cross and Jacobs fighting on the outside. Jacobs stalks Cross but Cross suckers him in and kicks the ring steps into Kyle's knee. Cross goes in for the kill and delivers a Cross Cutter ON THE STEPS! While this is happening Collins snatches Seth's Intercontinental Title belt from ringside and clobbers the champion from behind with it. He disposes of the evidence and picks up Seth's carcass and hits the Fall From Heaven as the ref gets his attention back to the match as EMTs attend to Kyle Jacobs. The pinfall is academic after that as Collins BUILDS MOMENTUM for Bragging Rights. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%