AEW Collision
July 1, 2023
Hamilton, ON, Canada
Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Men's First Round Match: "The Natural" Dustin Rhodes vs. "Switchblade" Jay White
The first round of the Owen Hart Cup kicked off on Wednesday and continues along tonight. The announcers point out that Dustin's been tied up in some other business with the Mogul Embassy, but that is put on hold for tonight as, as one of the few members of the AEW roster to share a locker room with Owen Hart, he wanted to be sure to participate in this.
Anyway these two have a pretty solid match with Dustin bringing an intense brawling and White working a sound brawling tactic in return, mixed with slimy heel sneakiness. Dustin reverses the Blade Runner but White turns it into a roll-up with his hands on the trunks to steal the win!
The production team flash a graphic on the bracket. Jay White next week will face the winner of the other first round match tonight between Ricky Starks and Brian Cage. Also, in the spirit of having Owen's locker room mates compete, the crowd pops as it's revealed that the final first round match that will happen on Dynamite will be......Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy! (side note: god dammit Jeff Jarrett, way to check into rehab at the worst time)
This match got a
***1/4, 72% overall rating however the overall was lower than both the crowd reaction and match quality, which means I'm kicking off my July with the first DUD show of the game. And White was one of the most over guys I'm using tonight, ruh roh.
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Backstage we see a limousine arrive and out walks Samoa Joe! That's certainly a fancier arrival than we're accustomed to seeing from Joe. We last saw Joe attacking Punk after his match at Forbidden Door. Punk's demanded to get Joe face to face tonight.
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Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Women's First Round Match: NJPW Strong Women's Champion Willow Nightingale vs. Ruby Soho w/ Saraya and Toni Storm
We last saw Willow having a solid outing against Toni next week only to have the match disrupted by the surprise appearance of the ROH Women's champion Athena. Fellow Outcast Saraya lost on Wednesday to Britt Baker. Ruby Soho was a finalist in this tournament a year ago, but this year she doesn't provide much more help to get on the board. Botched interference from Toni leads to Willow picking up the win and just like that, both members of the Outcasts are out of the tournament, ensuring Toni won't be seeing one of her stablemates as a challenger.
The women's bracket is shown, much like with the men's tournament - another first round match is taking place tonight. The aforementioned Athena makes her in-ring return against Riho, with the winner facing Willow next week. On Wednesday, the final first round match will see Emi Sakura face off against Hikaru Shida.
**3/4, 62% overall rating
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We cut to an eerie looking room. At the forefront of it all is “The Redeemer” Miro, fresh off of picking up impressive wins in each of the first two Collision episodes. Miro has a deadly serious expression on his face.
“There are only three things that had motivated me – my TNT Championship, a vengeful god, and a flexible, double-jointed wife. Before two weeks ago, it had been a long time since anybody saw me in AEW. I took my time, I waited for an opportunity. I trusted God to give me a sign when the time would be right to make a return. To give me a higher purpose. I’d been in exile for almost a year. And then at one point I was summoned.
And then when he finally spoke to me, he told me I would be his favorite champion once again. That I would retain my beloved TNT championship gold. That I would receive the glory and adoration. There were his blessings in my muscles that I would never lose again. And all I’d need to do is praise him.
It was at that moment that I realized that this coward was not the one kneel to. The Redeemer kneels before no man or god. So now I know what I must do. I must walk alone and I must be what this fool is not – righteous without seeking reward.
Therefore I now renounce my god, my gold, and my beautiful wife. Because I am Miro, and I am godless.”
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AEW World Trios Championship: The House of Black (Malakai Black, Brody King, and Buddy Matthews) (C) vs. The Spanish Announce Project (Angelico, Serpentico, and Luther)
I envisioned this open challenge as a glorified squash, which actually parlayed into a decent match rating here. Probably because Serpentico and Angelico are very much guys who can sell their asses off and make everything the House does look like death. Side note – Serpentico is the losingest wrestler in AEW history with a career AEW record of 14-122 as of right now. Fittingly, he also takes the loss here with Buddy pinning him after Matthews Law.
***, 63% overall rating
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As we return from commercial, the House of Black are still in the ring, Malakai with a microphone in hand. Before he can even utter a word, the music of The Acclaimed hits. Out come The Acclaimed and Daddy Ass! No time to chat here tonight, tonight is all about them trying to kick ass. The House exchange a flurry of rights with the faces before eventually taking their leave and deciding to fight another day.
Anthony Bowens grabs a microphone. “House of Black! We still want our Trios title match. You and us, 2 weeks, Blood and Guts. No disqualification.”
A sinister grin works its way across the face of Malakai Black, with a nod to seemingly accept the challenge.
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Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Women's First Round Match: ROH Women's Champion "The Fallen Goddess" Athena vs. Riho
The first round matches continue and here is where I give the DUD rating a nice hearty fuck you as these two women went out there and proceeded to have the best women's match I've had so far in the game, only to be punished with a lower overall rating than it should have.
The Outcasts were shown backstage watching on, trying not to interfere in this one but Toni Storm clearly not liking seeing Athena here kicking all kinds of ass. Anyway these two beat the shit out of each other with Athena's typical mean streak being matched by the diminutive Riho breaking out every bit of hard-hitting joshi upbringing she could muster.
In the end though it was Athena prevailing with the O-Face, setting up a semi-match with a fellow champion in Willow Nightingale next week!
****, 71% overall rating
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Mark Henry is backstage with the AEW World Tag Team Champions, FTR.
Henry: "Dax, Cash, on Wednesday we saw you guys successfully defend your titles against the Jericho Appreciation Society, only for Bullet Club Gold to send a signal to you. It would seem your issues with them are far from over."
Dax: "You're right Mark, we have a much bigger issue looming with Bullet Club Gold. They seem to like cheap shotting people from behind, and we're not sure why. We've made it clear to everyone that we'll put the titles on the line for anyone that wants to take their shot. All they have to do is name a time and a place."
Cash: "And we know they still want a piece of our good friend Ricky Starks too. He's got business to tend to in just a few minutes against Brian Cage in the Owen Hart tournament. But he's been wanting to get his hands on Bullet Club too, and if he wins tonight he can kill two birds with one stone next week. Hope you're paying attention, Jay White!"
Dax: "Oh and one more thing, we didn't forget about you, Cage. We know you've got your Mogul Embassy friends on speed dial. Don't even think about calling for help, because we've got a few friends who have a score to settle with you."
*Sting and Darby Allin walk on scene, brandishing baseball bats as we go to break*
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Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Men's First Round Match: "The Machine" Brian Cage w/ Swerve Strickland and Prince Nana vs. "Absolute" Ricky Starks
Our final tournament match of the evening sees Starks opting to go it alone, knowing he's always got backup on hand in case the Mogul Embassy choose to make nuisances of themselves.
To the heels' credit, they opted to let Brian Cage largely do his thing, as the big man dominated the early part of the contest. The announcers reminded us of the bitter history these two have had over the years, dating back to their time together and subsequent fallout in Team Taz.
Starks eventually regains momentum and the Mogul Embassy try to intervene. But true to their backstage appearance, Darby and Sting make their way out to the ring. Swerve tries to play it cool and exit gracefully at the threat of Sting's baseball bat, while Nana is chased around the ring by Darby on a Skateboard.
All of the hijinx around the ring leave Cage alone with Starks in the ring, where Starks impressively gets the big guy up for the Roshambo and the win. Ricky Starks advances to the semi-final as Jay White and the rest of Bullet Club Gold look on from backstage.
***, 67% overall rating
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We see CM Punk backstage, heading out to the ring ready to face Samoa Joe. Mark Henry asks him if he has any words before tonight's main event. Punk tells Mark he has no comments other than the fact that Joe is about to find out that it's clobberin' time.
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CM Punk makes his way out to the ring, looking focused and determined as he throws his shirt into the stands and waits for Joe's arrival. And waits. And waits. Referee Bryce Remsburg and ring announcer Dasha Gonzalez find themselves asking the same thing - where is Samoa Joe?
After Dasha makes another attempt at introducing him and his music hits again, Joe finally saunters out to the ring but noticeably still in street clothes. He gets into the ring and yanks the mic out of Dasha's hand.
Joe: "Punk, Punk, Punk...we must have a misunderstanding. Last week you said you wanted to see me here on Collision. All week AEW have been saying we'd be facing off one-on-one. But I don't recall AEW ever saying we'd have an actual match.
We've had more than enough matches over the year, Punk. I assumed you'd be tired of that. I just thought we were here to fight."
Punk yells at Joe that he's fine with that, let's just have a fight then. Joe gets right in Punk's face.
Joe: "Good, I'm glad to hear that. Honestly, I'm not paid enough to wrestle you. I beat you almost 2 decades ago, I've got nothing left to prove there.
But if you wanted to fight, well, I've got no prob---"
Joe abruptly cuts himself off as he clocks Punk with the microphone, the cheap shot sending Punk down.
What we have now is the two men getting into a big fight that Joe is very clearly winning with the element of the cheap shot on his side. The slow beat-down of Punk does last for a while, effectively making this a proper main event angle.
The announcers ask what has gotten into Joe, why does he seem to hellbent on actually taking Punk out of commission in this brawl. The fight spills to the outside and a few officials are tossed aside by Joe who has a plan and is damned if he's not going to execute it.
Joe eventually wedges Punk's arm in between the steel steps and the ring post, and he then uses his full body weight to crash into the steps, sending nearly 300 lbs of force on Punk's arm.
Joe leaves the ring smiling as Punk writhes in agony, with the medical staff tending to Punk's damaged arm.
77% overall show rating
In the grand scheme, considering that your roster is loaded with ****1/2 matches even on DUD shows and you pull low 80s, having a 77% DUD show with my roster is nothing to sneeze at at all. That's roughly what I'd expect from a Rampage. Somewhat glad I had a good amount of angles and promos as those aren't as susceptible to the DUD hits as matches are.