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-   -   Top 5 worst movies you watched (https://www.tpwwforums.com/showthread.php?t=134528)

Big Vic 01-29-2018 03:26 PM

Top 5 worst movies you watched
 
  1. The Box (with Cameron Diaz)
  2. Crybaby
  3. The Whole Ten Yards
  4. Attack of the Clones
  5. Epic Movie

slik 01-29-2018 03:57 PM

1. A Serbian Film
2. House Of The Dead
3. Stuck On You

are the only ones that come to mind

My Final Heaven 01-29-2018 05:04 PM

Mary Shelley's Frankenstein
On the Line starring Lance Bass
Ninja Resurrection
After <s>disgusting Hollywood nepotism</s> Earth
True Memoirs of an International Assassin

RP 01-29-2018 07:10 PM

The Murder on Orient Express
Ice Queen
Spiderman 3
The Shape of Water ( The Shape of Turd ) as far as i'm concerned.
Batman vs Superman

Savio 01-29-2018 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slik (Post 5079313)
1. A Serbian Film
2. House Of The Dead
3. Stuck On You

are the only ones that come to mind

Oh come on Stuck on you wasn't THAT bad.

Blonde Moment 01-29-2018 09:46 PM

Battle beyond the Stars
Hercules /Lou Ferrigno
Hard to Die
Son of the Pink Panther
Superman III / Superman IV

SlickyTrickyDamon 01-29-2018 10:09 PM

Crocodile Hunter Movie
Chairman of the Board
Battlefield Earth
Police Academy: Mission to Moscow.
Batman and Robin.

Destor 01-30-2018 09:53 AM

If I can remember the title then it probably shouldnt be on the list

Helmsphere 01-30-2018 11:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Savio (Post 5079527)
Oh come on Stuck on you wasn't THAT bad.

I found it entertaining even among too much Cher.

Helmsphere 01-30-2018 11:31 AM

Mortal Kombat: Annihalation
The Villiage
Ghost Rider
Any Scary Movie/Parody Spoof Beyond 3 (Which was barely watchable itself)
Aeon Flux

Bad News Gertner 01-30-2018 01:58 PM

1. Star Trek: Wrath of Khan
2. Star Wars
3. Empire Strikes Back
4. Return of the Jedi
5. Anchorman 2

Seanny One Ball 01-30-2018 02:04 PM

1.Just Married
2.Eden Lake
3.The Neon Demon
4.Cherry Tree Lane
5.Spring Breakers

I have seen a lot of lower budget trash in my time but it's the big names in productions that have absolutely zero merit to a bloke like me that fuck me right off.
I'd immediately know the motivations of every film maker that turns out a film as pointless as "Just Married" but money is a fairly obvious end game for the talentless...it's the other four on my list that genuinely angered me because every one of them has talent involved that should know better.

Seanny One Ball 02-01-2018 09:14 AM

1. Gods and Generals
2. Just Married
3. Eden Lake
4. The Neon Demon
5. Cherry Tree Lane

Updated as of last night's new low point.

Bobholly138 02-01-2018 10:24 AM

1.Bad Boys-Will Smith and Martin one from the 90s.
2.Vampeggedon
3.ID4
4.Forest Gump
5.Any Peter Jackson film after The Frighteners

Fignuts 02-02-2018 06:31 AM

Very apparent that many of you have not perused the horror section on Netflix and hulu.

Makes every movie listed so far look like the godfarther.

Seanny One Ball 02-02-2018 02:39 PM

I'm only naming films that had decent sized budgets.
Low budget horror isn't so much bad as it is depressing.

Cool King 02-02-2018 03:20 PM

The first five I could think of, in no particular order:

Snowpiercer
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Paranormal Activity
Zack and Miri Make a Porno

Cool King 02-02-2018 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slik (Post 5079313)
1. A Serbian Film

Good God, you actually watched that?

Cool King 02-02-2018 03:20 PM

I've never seen it myself but a friend of mine has told me all about it.

Cool King 02-03-2018 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cool King (Post 5081220)
The first five I could think of, in no particular order:

Snowpiercer
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Paranormal Activity
Zack and Miri Make a Porno

Actually, I got mixed up there, it wasn't Zack and Miri but Knocked Up I was thinking of.

Seanny One Ball 02-03-2018 02:34 PM

You should try watching a genuinely bad film. You'd feel a bit ashamed of your choices there if you had.

Cool King 02-03-2018 02:36 PM

I'll ask Mark Kermode for a list of bad films and then watch them.

Seanny One Ball 02-03-2018 02:42 PM

Mark Kermode is alright but he thinks The Exorcist is the best film ever made.
It isn't.

I just mean you seem to have put mediocrity in there ahead of true crap. I think you can do better with your hatred but then I expect better of everybody all of the time.

Seanny One Ball 02-03-2018 02:52 PM

I just had a look and Kermode's worst film is the Exorcist 2: The Heretic.
No surprise there then.

I watched The Piano recently and fucking hated it. It made me want to strangle Holly Hunter and she doesn't say one word in the entire thing.
God it was bad. Anyway I looked it up and it holds great critical acclaim yet in amongst the reviews I found this treasured gem:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Peter Bradshaw, Guardian film critic
The most insidiously awful type of film, however, is Arthouse Lite. A key example is The Piano by Jane Campion. It is middlebrow, pseudo-literary cinema, which is shallow and prissy and genteel. Those self-regarding pretty-pretty compositions of Holly Hunter on the beach, drove me up the wall. She's mute: which manages to be such a smug passive-aggressive idea. That's my thing about bad films. Honest dreck is fine. It's straight-to-video rubbish and I don't get upset about it, but I can get upset about middleweight nonsense.

That's exactly the sort of film that needs to be burned out and removed from sight so that nobody can copy it.

Terrence Malick makes films as bad as this.

Seanny One Ball 02-03-2018 02:53 PM

Jane Campion also made In The Cut, the one film where Mark Ruffalo fucking sucks.

Helmsphere 02-03-2018 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seanny One Ball (Post 5081379)
Jane Campion also made In The Cut, the one film where Mark Ruffalo fucking sucks.

The one where Meg Ryan shows her tits constantly?

Ruien 02-04-2018 08:46 AM

The Cube 2.

Seanny One Ball 02-04-2018 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Helmsphere (Post 5081391)
The one where Meg Ryan shows her tits constantly?

I think there is one nude sex scene if that fits your definition of showing her tits constantly.
It's not great though because this was when Meg Ryan had just received that fucked up facelift and she looked grim.

Seanny One Ball 02-04-2018 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ruien (Post 5081569)
The Cube 2.

Whichever one had the autistic savant guy in it is the worst one.
The first one was tremendous though, I thoroughly enjoyed that one hungover Sunday morning.

Ruien 02-04-2018 09:23 PM

Ya, I enjoyed the first one. Are there more than 2?

Seanny One Ball 02-05-2018 03:17 AM

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cube_Zero

Feast your eyes.
Cube Zero is weird though. I actually think The Cabin In The Woods ripped it off a teeny bit with the employees running the experiment only The Cabin In the Woods did it a lot better.

Fignuts 02-05-2018 03:19 AM

The most recent Fantastic Four is the worst for me.

Everything else here might be worse from a technical standpoint, but they're at least interesting because of how bad they are.

Fantastic Four is boring. I have never been more bored watching a movie. It is formulaic to a ridiculous degree. Even the lighting and color palette is boring. The old FF movies were at least bright and colorful.

Seanny One Ball 02-05-2018 03:57 AM

The most boring film I have ever seen is probably The Deer Hunter or Apocalypse Now.

Dreadful guff.

Seanny One Ball 02-05-2018 05:12 AM

I may have to add Brian De Palma's "Redacted" in here.I had to turn that off. That was the nastiest, ugliest piece of shit I have ever seen.
A film about soldiers raping Iraqi's…it just turns your stomach. Not only that but the soldiers are all caricatures of the least likely men every to serve in the army. I'm not even sure why Brian De Palma would make this shit…it's just disgusting crap. "RAPE IS BAD! AMERICAN SOLDIERS ARE RAPISTS!"

Who knows what the motivation was but apparently Roger Ebert gave it 3.5 stars out of 4…the cancer must have moved to his brain by then.

Swiss Ultimate 02-05-2018 05:37 AM

Ebert hated the military because it was popular for Hollywood types to hate the military.

Seanny One Ball 02-05-2018 05:46 AM

Watch Redacted and you'll understand my wonder.
No amount of military hate makes that film halfway decent let alone "near perfect"

Big Vic 02-05-2018 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fignuts (Post 5082112)
The most recent Fantastic Four is the worst for me.

Everything else here might be worse from a technical standpoint, but they're at least interesting because of how bad they are.

Fantastic Four is boring. I have never been more bored watching a movie.

Watch "The Box".... it's nothing but boredom.

ronmiller 02-07-2018 12:11 AM

I try to forget the movies that don't seem interesting to me!!

Sixx 02-09-2018 06:55 PM

Battlefield Earth.

Seanny One Ball 02-09-2018 06:57 PM

I bought a copy of that just to say I have it. Roger Christian sounds so half heartedly defiant in the commentary.

Sixx 02-09-2018 07:13 PM

Well, that movie had some good actors in it, but it was destined to fail. You should expect that when filming a movie based on a book from Hubbard.

Seanny One Ball 02-09-2018 07:29 PM

A book who's sales were almost solely due to COS bulk purchasing copies. Self written, self published and self sold essentially. Roger Christian obviously didn't know that because he seems confounded as to why a best selling book had no fans willing to watch an adaptation.

The film itself is egregious, abject, woeful and any other disdainful synonym you can think of but it has a sort of odd charm to it.
I can't bring myself to hate a film that gave Barry Pepper the lead role even if they make him a hopelessly inept idiot.
Travolta and Whittaker look like they are trying not to topple over the whole time.

Simple Fan 02-09-2018 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Destor (Post 5079743)
If I can remember the title then it probably shouldnt be on the list

Same and I had to Google Brooke Shields to find the name of the movie I was thinking about. Can't name 5 but the worst movie I've ever seen is Wanda Navada staring Peter Fonda and a young Brooke Shields.

EIWF 02-13-2018 07:17 PM

The day the earth stood still
Ghost rider
Batman and robin
ID4 2
Jaws 4

Seanny One Ball 11-26-2018 07:39 PM

Lucy would be in my list now.

Destor 11-26-2018 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Destor (Post 5079743)
If I can remember the title then it probably shouldnt be on the list


Sepholio 11-26-2018 08:40 PM

Hercules In New York
Hercules In New York
Hercules In New York
Hercules In New York
Hercules In New York

Seanny One Ball 11-26-2018 09:16 PM

Dubbed Arnie. I remember seeing that as a little boy and loving it.

Sepholio 11-26-2018 11:17 PM

There are a lot of movies I remember loving as a little boy that I now realize are the drizzling shits.

Danny Electric 12-04-2018 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seanny One Ball (Post 5081579)
Whichever one had the autistic savant guy in it is the worst one.
The first one was tremendous though, I thoroughly enjoyed that one hungover Sunday morning.

Isn’t it the first one with the autistic guy in it?

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 08:55 AM

I obviously confused my cubes!

Sixx 12-04-2018 08:57 AM

Huh, just learned the second Cube as directed by a Polish guy.

Danny Electric 12-04-2018 09:20 AM

Just looking at him on IMDB, he’s worked on some very good movies.

Danny Electric 12-04-2018 09:24 AM

I remember when I was younger I had a friend who was obsessed with Sarah Michelle Gellar and in a trip to Blockbusters he proceeded to rent out this diabolical movie where she works in a kitchen and the food comes to life, I can’t rember its name, it was terrible.

He also went on a date to the cinema and her friends were coming along so asked me to come, and I didn’t find out till we were there that it was bloody Sweet Home Alabama which was also diabolical.

Sixx 12-04-2018 09:26 AM

Holy shit. In Polish it's A girl from Alabama so I had no idea this piece of shit was called Sweet Home Alabama. I love that song...

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 11:49 AM

That Sarah Michelle Gellar chef film is called Simply Irresistible and I saw it when I was baked many a time in my youth.

I can't remember much about it.

My mate once spent hours downloading and printing out pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar to put in a big folder he kept under his bed.
Back then a USB stick would have blown his mind.

Danny Electric 12-04-2018 05:23 PM

I’m sure my mate and yours would have gotten on well.

Sepholio 12-04-2018 05:43 PM

I too also had an odd obsession with Sarah Michelle Gellar in my youth.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 05:57 PM

I think any bloke in their early 30's probably did.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 05:57 PM

I own a copy of Cruel Intentions. No denying it. That shit still works.

Sixx 12-04-2018 06:06 PM

I don't think I really had.

Never watched Buffy.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 06:10 PM

What about I Know What You Did Last Summer

Sixx 12-04-2018 06:15 PM

That I did, but I was hot or Love Hewitt in it.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 06:54 PM

Yeah Jennifer Love Hewitt couldn't have been designed better for pubescent boys really. Heartbreakers was something else.

Destor 12-04-2018 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SixxT9 (Post 5202757)
I don't think I really had.

Never watched Buffy.

Buffy is high on my list of things i geek over

Destor 12-04-2018 07:04 PM

Never was attracted to SMG tho. Charisma Carpenter and Eliza Dushku were the smokeshows of the buffyverse.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 07:17 PM

I liked Hannigan too. She was good back then.

Sixx 12-04-2018 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Destor (Post 5202779)
Never was attracted to SMG tho. Charisma Carpenter and Eliza Dushku were the smokeshows of the buffyverse.

Dushku <3

Especially in Jay and Silent Bob.

Sixx 12-04-2018 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seanny One Ball (Post 5202783)
I liked Hannigan too. She was good back then.

Can't fucking stand her.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 07:53 PM

I don't mean as an actress. She seemed attainable at that age.

Sixx 12-04-2018 08:03 PM

Bah. She's even more attainable now that she's old.

Seanny One Ball 12-04-2018 08:04 PM

I don't wanna

Sixx 12-04-2018 08:07 PM

Neither do I.

Am I misunderstanding that word?

Attainable as in you could have a chance with her orrrr?

Danny Electric 12-05-2018 06:22 AM

My favourite around that time was Denise Richards.


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