Where are you getting these from?

These are wedding presents Prince Harry and Megan Markle had to give up.

Solo: A Star Wars Story - 2/5

I enjoyed it...... wasn't as good as the first one (not really close either), but it was still a lot of fun.....

I couldn't disagree more. It tried to do cheesy-chic but ended up with channel-changing awkwardness.

The pointless Swedish bint, the dreadful metal arm guy, the complete and utter waste of Merlin in some bizarre and protracted attempt to draw emotion....it was all awful but nothing can stand above the sheer fucking stupidity they showed in putting Colin "I'm supposed to be dead" Firth in the trailer.
Even for the home entertainment crowd it was ruined, they put his face on the front cover for fuck's sake.

I was appalled by that film.

Halle Berry looked fucking insane.

I buy them from entertainment exchanges, charity shops and auctions and the occasional full priced purchase from the supermarket.

Kingsman the Golden Circle came with The Dinner and Choke for 99p

I fucking loved Golden Circle although I'm biased cause I got to stand in front of the Tailor shop from the movie the week it was released.

Moviepass #64 Upgrade 6/10 there was a lot of promise to the story but it was flat although the fight scenes were awesome and also a bit hilarious. But something felt off the whole time...so only a 6

Seeing action point in like 20 min..I hope the trailer didn't use up all the funny spots

The Dinner: 2.5/4

Too uncomfortable to enjoy, too haphazard to quantify as a screenplay and too miserable to relate to. Every actor in it is magnificent though so if you like horrible tales of woe you may consider this a perfect movie.


The House: 3/4

Will Ferrell is funny again! Low brow but well timed slapstick and harsh verbal buffoonery. Jason Mantzoukas owns this movie. Forget Ferrell and Poehler, RISE Mantzoukas!

Choke: 2.5/4

Sam Rockwell saves another weird indie from complete oblivion. Chuck Palahniuk films are not good for rational minds. Angelica Houston is great but I don't want to see Kelly MacDonald playing yet another sour faced pathetic bint ever again. The one from Community gets her duds out in this so that was a nice surprise.

Gary The Tennis Coach: 1/4

Shamefully I laughed several times but this is bad taste taken to an unreasonable degree. Do not watch.

Side Effects: 1/4

An unpredictable tale but one so boring as to remove all interest from it's conclusion. Rooney Mara can't carry a film, Jude Law needs depth to play a Doctor and is instead unfairly fed to the shallows. What a snoozer. I'd rewatch Gary The Tennis Coach twice over this.

Upgrade - 9/10

Really fun movie. Loved it.

The Void. 8/10

Found this horror movie on Netflix. Fantastic practical effects.

forgot to rate

Moviepass #65 Action Point 4/10 - Had I not seen the trailer 57 times I probably could have gone up to a 6.5 but every single funny spot in the movie was in the trailer and it just ruined it.

Deadpool 2 9/10 I liked it more than the first.

Just saw Solo. I give it an x out of y (where x and y are both arbitrary numbers of an unequal value).

My only issue with the film is the "Teras Kasi" bit. Made my stomach churn thinking of that shitty, shitty game.

Convinced the only reason why all this "What if Kurt Russell got the part of Han Solo?" stuff is so big again recently is because the new guy looks like they cloned him. He does have the Ford mannerisms down, but I wouldn't be surprised if he appears in a remake/reboot of Big Trouble In Little China.

"We're looking for David Lo Pan."
"Waaaa?"
"DAVID LO PAN??"

........Then you have succeeded Mr. Burton......

Seen it many times before but its been a while.

Kill Bill volume 1 - 999999999 out of 999999999.9

Love it so much.

I remember not caring too much for volume 1 and thinking volume 2 was "alright"

Vol.2 might be my fav Tarantino film

Kill Bill is horrible in review. Thankfully I was young enough to get away with enjoying that at the cinema.
It aged so much worse than Fight Club and Fight Club feels like it has been on chemo for twenty years.
I'd have to say Tarantino's best film is Jackie Brown followed by Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction. When it's all said and done though it's True Romance that proved that a more versatile and productively focused director will make a better film using a Tarantino script than Tarantino himself can.

3 Billboards Outside EBBING, Missouri - 4/4

What I witnessed in those two hours is the reason why films are made, the reason why children grow up wanting to be actors and the truest form of acting chemistry I may ever have seen. This film has one flaw and yet the flaw is so tiny that it attracts interest rather than scorn. Martin McDonagh has a preoccupation with the treatment of dwarves in society and I predict that someday it may become a regrettable signature. His brother's trademark seems to be Catholicism, sex and chicanery of all kinds which is why his films seem more familiar at first.

I digress.

Frances McDormand was perfect in a role that any actress would bite their right arm off for but that none could have touched as wholly nor infused with as much of themself as Frances did.
Woody Harrelson is walking the line of genius actor at this stage in his career and I think he could actually win the big one someday soon if he gets a lead as wonderful as this supporting role was. Here he plays the sweetest role of his life and he gives everything to the film, taking nothing away with him at the finish. If the film belongs to Frances McDormand then it's in no small part due to the fact that Woody gave her his absolute finest. I really cannot overstate just how excellent the part he plays is.

Sam Rockwell is one of cinemas real heroes, an actor willing to lead, support or even job just to create something beautiful. He plays his position here like a point kicker, popping up at the right time to score points in any number of different moods and situations, each to bring a joy, a fear or a sorrow to your overworked heart by the film's end.

I try not to review plots in doing this because spoilers are a bastard, so I will say that Martin McDonagh has absolutely outdone himself here. This is a work of art.

Good review. I haven't seen it yet, but it's ranked high on the IMDb top 250 list and has stayed there consistently in a "No Country For Old Men" type of way rather than one of those Oscar movies that gets rated highly at first then fizzles out the next year when everyone forgets about it, so it's probably going to be one of those movies that's here to stay.

It's a masterpiece. I now know how Mark Kermode felt when he first saw Blade Runner. This one is a game changer to me. Those McDonagh brothers have talent pissing out of them, both create great films but Calvary and 3 Billboards are individual contributions to cinema that will last for as long as we have means to play them. Sheer genius.

The first one is just fun. The music is top notch, great dialogue along with great action sequences and story telling. I think it has aged perfectly fine over the years. I will have to rewatch the 2nd one at some point as I never really thought it kept the momentum like the first one. The first one just really flowed nicely.

Kill Bill was the project that transformed a uniquely talented trope-loving auteur into a loud, obnoxiously forward self parody. The films he made in the 90's are so far ahead of the films he has made this millennium it's as if he himself is making the films that over-influenced, over-privileged film students should be leaving education to create in homage to him only he's doing it with crazy studio money and churning out three hour films with B-movie plots with about half an hour of quality material.

He is a living warning for anybody who values style over substance. You can only borrow from so many other films for so long before people start to notice that your films are a bit hollow.
There's the obvious danger in replicating his beloved one dimensional drive through movies.

I mean yeah, from a purely critical standpoint its weak, but its so much god damn fun. Plus, I believe it was always meant as more of a tribute than its own thing.

All of his films are genre-tributes now.

I suggested Kill Bill had started that though it was probably Jackie Brown given it's a blacksploitation flick with some serious cash behind it but it's an Elmore Leonard story so you know it could work without Tarantino in another, less appreciated form.

He's too full on now, his films are Nicolas Cage turned up to 11. I saw the original Inglorious Bastards and it was more fun than his version even with the spectacular bar gunfight scene.

His best film for ages was Hateful Eight. The ending nearly killed it but that's a good film.

I'm not saying he bores me or is bad at what he does, I just wish he was doing more with the resources at his disposal than reintroducing films that struggled to entertain people with low income in the 70's.

He's good @ racist and sexist rants.

He should jus spend his days filming those.

Add a little of Samuel saying "motherfucker" and you got a hit.

Throw in protracted and unnecessary shots of women's feet and you have a Tarantino joint.

Dont forget spitting in women's faces.

I love all of Tarantinos stuff. Maybe its a critical blind spot for me but i think his stuff is A+

Has he made any musicals?

Man if only :love:

Hereditary - 9/10


Toni Collette deserves an Oscar nom​.

Good film - creepy - and dark, very, very dark.

Moviepass #66 Hereditary 9/10 - the best horror comedy you'll see this year

Hotel Artemis - 8/10.

Fun movie. Batista and Jody Foster make a good team.

Stop watching the same movies!

Moviepass #67 Hotel Artemis - 7.5/10

>>>Breaks Cycle<<<

Alex Strangelove on Netflix - 7/10

Not as emotionally endearing as 'Love, Simon' but more realistic portrayal of teens

Triple 9 - 3.5/4

The box cover and title of this exceptional heist thriller undermine the sales potential and render it an easy walk-past on the sales shelf. Thank fucking God Sicario made me stop caring about movie covers so much or I fear I would never have gotten round to watching this.


Triple 9 is a remarkably well made film. As far as heist movies with car chases and gunfights go this really is up there and John Hillcoat just keeps proving that he can make any action work for him. The visceral, shocking suddenness of The Proposition's gunplay gets an HD touch up and a modern wardrobe and means of transport; the up close and personal horrors of Lawless are turned onto a contemporary city block which oozes impurity and who's civilians carry a greater indifference rather than a wisely turned blind eye.
This is a movie to be constantly surprised by and honestly it's miles ahead of the choppily paced The Town which is itself a damned good film. If you like films that push forward and never stop or stall then Triple 9 is a good shout.
Chiwetel Eijiofor, Woody Harrelson, Anthony Mackie and Casey Affleck are all in a high gear and they are clearly enjoying the material as a rare high quality filler job between prestige projects or blockbusters.
The obvious downside to this great movie is Kare Winslet's horrendous accent. Somebody told her she could do accents, probably the same idiot that told Nicole Kidman but no. Stick to the Jack Nicholson approach and don't stretch yourselves ladies, it takes me out of a film when I hear someone trying an accent on for size.

Also who the fuck cast Winslet as Gal Gadot's sister? Egregious errors are abundant in the female side of this film but who cares, they are small parts that should have been rewritten to save minor embarrassment.

Ummm. Wow.

The Disaster Artist: 4.5/5. It was fun to watch, especially having seen the source material and having read the book. There were a couple points where I thought "Jeez, Dave Franco actually kinda looks like Greg Sestero."

Dave Franco is incredible in that film. In the end when they do the side by side scenes from The Room and The Disaster Artist equivalent cast members you see that he has even got his speech pattern and timing down perfectly. Nobody else quite got the timing as well as he did.

I thought it was great too. Zach Efron looked so huge next to Josh Hutcherson it was hilarious. I thought Josh was quite a big kid but obviously not.

Black Panther finally out on DVD&Blu Ray!

Picked it up yesterday. Why don’t they do the One Shots anymore?

Michael B Jordan was badass in that movie. I like him a lot.

The Incredibles 2 - 8/10

Fun & Good. Not as good as the first -- but good -- and fun!

Moviepass #68 Incredibles 2 7/10 I liked it a lot but it was like, it took 14 years for this (and they had to remind you of that at the beginning!)

Incredibles 2-8/10

Loved it. Really fun. The set pieces are great.

Jurassic World 2 7/10

Moviepass #69 Tag 8.5/10 funniest movie I've seen in a while

Jake Johnson is the man, I love that guy.

Adventures in Babysitting-8/10
Ridiculously over the top but fun 80s movie with hilarious characters and whacky situational comedy. Also, Elisabeth Shue was a fox.

Josie and The Pussycats: 5.5/10

Girlfriend is a big fan of this flim, and when I told her I've never seen it, She made me watch it, had some funny bits at the beginning but went downhill quick. Looking back it's weird that Rosario Dawson had the biggest career of the three considering she was the least known at the time.

I only see nick from New Girl though..

Been meaning to watch this since I was a kid. We had the VHS somehow, and my dad would always recommend it to us kids, but we would always pick something else.... but I always thought eventually we would watch it.... and then we never did..... VHS probably still sitting never watched at my parent's house.

Currently on Netflix. Highly advised

Elizabeth Shue is still a fox. Even in Battle Of The Sexes.

Truth!

Hereditary

9/10

Jesus fuck, that ones gonna stay with me after a while.

Ocean's 8-7/10

Good cast that has great chemistry together. I'm forever in love with Anne Hathaway. The plot was good enough and the heist itself was good and fun to watch. Subplot and payoff were a little meh but I enjoyed it nonetheless.

Ocean's 8 - 6/10

A lot of fun.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - I guess 6/7 out of 10. Dinos do Dino things.

Ocean's 8 - 3.5/5

I liked it. The cast worked out great. Surprise cameos were awesome. Just needed a little more work on a few things.

I'm down for another if it happens.

"Suburbicon" - 3/4

This was a lot more enjoyable than reviews would admit. I think people have a problem with the unnecessary racial sub-plot but I get it man. It's a film about white entitlement, guilt, shame and the bad decisions that go along with it.
I enjoyed Julianne Moore and I thought the kid was pretty good too but Matt Damon really should play more neurotic heel characters. He played a dark hearted, amoral, fidgety snake in the grass as well if not better than he did in The Talented Mr Ripley. A few good bad-guy roles could see him land a proper Oscar someday.

Downsizing - 1/4

You know you're in real trouble when a film goes to "comedy Asian accent" territory but keeps everyone in a straight face just long enough to legitimise it for morons.

This film lived up to the very bad hype. Avoid because it eats up over two hours with pseudo politics and a horrendous waste of Kirsten Wiig and the comedy her bald presence guarantees.

This was a real eye opener. Thank God Nebraska, Sideways, The Descendants and About Schmidt are all masterpieces because this one reminds us that even the masters have their great failures.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom-6/10

It's enjoyable for what it is, but the set pieces feel old and far too familiar. The cloning plot is back and they double down on it.

The ending leaves it open to really expand the universe, in a way they really haven't to this point. But to echo Dr Malcolm, just because they can, doesn't mean they should.

Ben Hur (1959) 5/10 Visually it was amazing. No CGI Greenscreen bullshit back then and looked amazing in scenes. Was very slow paces, not much going on in scenes. Heston had no range. The infamous race was impressive as fuck. Happy I watched it, but never want to see it again.

Blocker - Surprisingly a funny movie even though some bits are heavily far fetched. I enjoyed cena and his muscular but. Pamela Adon's daughter is a stone cold fox. Would do. 6.4/10

"TAKE IT BACK, BRAD! TAKE BACK WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT THOR!!!"

Won't You Be My Neighbor - 8.5 / 10

Really good documentary about Mr. Rogers and pretty uplifting. Lots of Daniel Tiger appearances is a plus!

Been meaning to catch it but it's not playing anywhere close to me. Might cry

Annihilation-8/10

From the same you who made Ex Machina. Thought this was a step down, but still very good and very compelling. The cast is great, and Portman as the lead was stellar. Loved the tone and the pacing. The ending was both wondrous and unnerving. Highly recommend.

Deadpool 2 - 4/5. Not as good as the first, but fun none the less. Some of the cameos were great too.

The Endless -- 8.5 / 10

Good film. It's about two brothers who return to the Doomsday Cult they were raised in...only to discover the cult might have been right the entire time.

Southland Tales - 3.5/4

One of the sporadic offerings from the director of Donnie Darko, and a better film in my opinion. This is a film for a contemplative mood, a film to make you wonder about genre and style. The director uses actors known for playing outlandish characters or for giving over the top performances in lowest common denominator comedies and other genre films and he interweaves musical performances and choreography to give the film a sort of musical American-Manga feel.

This is deceptive and appears incredibly low brow at first glance. A bit shiny and plastic, like the box is worth more than the toy until you open it up and feel the weight and see the quality.. The actors and the style would be hugely off putting to many critics/students/connoisseurs of film and it possibly put people in a state of unease which I think has coloured the reviews with accusations of tackiness, poor direction and a confusing plot.
I feel that way about Donnie Darko and conversely I enjoyed Southland Tales a great deal and feel it is a far more worthy and sincere film than the disingenuous and pretentious, Donnie Darko.

I see similarities with Japanese cinema and comics in this flick. I think it may be a bit of an homage.

I wonder if I should include plot spoilers in my reviews. I say a lot without really describing the story at all in basically every review I do.

Why do you think Donnie Darko was pretentious and disingenuous?

It's one of those films that has everything going for it but the story. It's the Emperor's New Clothes to sell a story with so little to it off the back of others desire to feel smart or cool.

I could be wrong, I find myself occasionally rewatching a once hated film and finding more merit in it the second time around. I was an alcoholic for a long time so I essentially have to re-evaluate my tastes a lot these days. I gave away my copy of Darko but I'll rewatch it the next time it's on TV.

I felt the same about Neon Demon but I have rewatched it and it's not that bad. Maybe 1.5/4 and it is beautifully shot and directed but with a flimsy story. I would love to see a Blu Ray of it.

Boyhood - 3/4

Watching this years after the hype had died down gave me a chance to see this for what it was - a brilliantly achieved experiment in film making with some excellent observations and insights into human interactions that Richard Linklater has made his signature. The time spent, the dedication to the project and overcoming or avoiding the obstacles that a production period of 15 years must have presented is an achievement so singularly impressive and unlikely to be repeated in fiction that it has to be respected and admired. The only comparable thing I can think of is the far longer running "7 and Up" documentary series by Michael Apted now running into it's 60-something year.

With all of that said I found the plot itself to be extremely bleak in parts and far too middle of the road in others to balance the tone. Not a particularly happy film nor did I think Patricia Arquette deserved an Oscar for it. No actor in the film was particularly impressive but I did like the two children that grow up in front of you, that was beautiful and the main reason people were so overwhelmed by it.

Dazed And Confused is still his magnum opus, followed immediately by A Scanner Darkly.

Natural Born Killers - 1/4

Oliver Stone is a mediocre director who has skated by with a generously high reputation built on bad films that make money. Somehow he seems to be a good screenwriter. Platoon is a great film but perhaps his direction was more a product of his involvement in the war and his brilliance as a writer than his aptitude as a director.

Now that I've said all of that, Natural Born Killers is a Badlands rip off with acid western direction and a real waste of talent in the few roles the film has.
It looks like Hunter S Thompson directed Bonnie And Clyde...but Hunter S Thompson was a loudmouth junkie loser so I'm not sure why anybody would want to see through his eyes.

As an indictment of the behaviour exhibited in the film by the protagonists it fails on every level as it makes no attempt to demonise their behaviour, simply explaining away their crimes by way of the film's title and some bad taste vignettes of their early home lives.
Everybody is a bastard but the kindly native Americans, nobody is righteously punished despite the brutal and complete annihilation of the majority of the cast.

This is a film that is feeble under even the slightest scrutiny and despite Stone's insistence on it as a morality story that doesn't glorify violence it is basically murder porn for 90's weirdo's.

I think everything has it's place and this was just bad enough that I'd say it belongs next to Maniac Cop or Henry: Portrait Of A Serial Killer in terms of worth. I don't resent these movies, I just have no desire to see them again now that I'm no longer bound by the youth enticing mystique of Adult rated movies.

I have to say that this was particularly bad, even in a week that included Downsizing.

Martha Marcy May Marlene - 4/4

John Hawkes and Elizabeth Olsen are as talented as anybody working in acting today. I have a real tendency towards them as actors and a real and engrained distaste for films that are hopelessly grim, unsettling or depressing.
Martha Marcy May Marlene is a story about emancipation, indoctrination, abuse, escape and re-assimilation. It is dark, ugly and up close but it's an honest film with good intentions, wonderful performances and a uniquely accepting tone which might sound odd but in review it is easy to see how a more judgemental take could have spoiled the lasting impact.

This is a film that could easily be turned into a play. Each scene is made for a stage really, you are exposed to a lot of conversations, explanations and proclamations from John Hawkes.
Two great performances hold together a pretty impressive piece of work. The ending stayed with me.

I know who was in the car at the end.

I dunno, I liked Donnie Darko alot. I see your point about it being a bit pretentious but I thought it was cool. The bunny is pretty iconic nowadays.

You could include a few plot spoiler filled comments in a spoiler tag below yur review if you wanted to.....

I'll see what I think when I get another chance at it but I remember really hating it.

When I was drinking I ways convinced Casey Affleck was bullshit. I thought The Assassination Of Jesse James was the worst western I had ever seen. It wasn't until 2016 or so that I rewatched it sober and realised I had been hating the things that made it a masterpiece.

I don't hold up much hope for anything so I may be surprised. I fucking hate Jena Malone though so maybe not.

I think I will if it feels necessary at the time. I am against spoiling things for others and spoiler tags can fail miserably if somebody screws up a quote so I may just give oblique references to the general plot.

You're an alcoholic for the rest of your life! You're sober, but you're still an alcoholic!

Don't you remember all that bullshit they say in therapy?

It's the tits.

Moviepass #70 Jurassic World 2 - 5/10 they couldnt be bothered to put some effort into the sequel i cant be bothered to put effort into a review

That's pretty much a perfect burn for a bad film.

I'm watching the Shape Of Water. The first 15 minutes are not encouraging. This is one of those films I'm liable to throw in the bin.
I know that this is an homage and good natured rib on old style horror and the steam punk fantasy but come off it. This is like modern art, the joke costs too damned much to be worth the punchline.

To use some antiquated language: So far it's about a masturbating mute with obvious and revolting mental retardation, Richard Jenkins plays a neurotic old queen and Michael Shannon hasn't turned up to save me from killing myself yet.
Octavia Spencer is still sassy and black, Wanda Sykes must have lost the coin flip.

This is why I've owned a copy of Amelie for over a decade and have never even popped it in the disc drive.

Michael Shannon pulled this whole film up a notch just by walking into a bathroom, giving a little pointer on piss and walking out chewing gum.

A man who had his fingers bitten off and reattached would not be bending them a day or so afterwards. Not today. Not in the 60's.

Everything in this is designed to inflate and inflame my prejudices.
Stop getting whimsy wrong. It's not whimsical, it's weird.

Now there's Nick Searcy playing a murderous military oaf keen for vivisection.
I feel like this is trying to be to horror as Airplane! was to comedy or Warrior was to martial arts movies. It's choc full of tropes but I don't like any of them. They just make me confused for the hype.

This is like every film Maila Nurmi ever made fun of.

Rod Serling was coining these quasi-profound truly maudlin tropes back when he was busy writing, creating and overseeing the Twilight Zone... and that was half a decade before the time in which this film is set.

Michael Stuhlbarg is the best thing about this but to be fair the acting is all on point. Nobody is outright bad besides the lead and that is clearly an issue of fucking terrible writing and direction.

I am tired of pretty films that have nothing new to say. I'm appalled that this film won Best Picture. I may actually keep this as a reminder never to go full price on a film I'm unsure of ever again.