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SmackDown!: December 7, 2040

Twenty Minute Opening Promo of Doom Time as Haven makes his way out. He's aware of what Victor Dark is trying to do, but if what occured on Raw was his best shot, he's in for more disappointment. "Victor can speak grandly as much as he wants, but until he himself has the guts to get his hands dirty and try on his own to break me, he is but words. I have never been beaten or swayed by mere words. So throw whatever grunts you can my way and I shall send them back to you, bruised and demoralized and humiliated as a message. I am the Dark Shepherd and no one..."

"Please, for the love of God, shut up, Haven", interrupts someone. What the hell? Quinten McDaniels comes out to the stage and has a mic in hand, looking to speak with Haven. "I've heard sermons like this before so many times from you and I'm just about at the end of my rope. Now, I don't really know or particularly care about whatever history happened between you and this Victor Dark person, but there is a grain of truth coming from his camp that struck a chord in me. It wasn't that long ago when you had a collection of us at your beck and call. You promised us the world. Chet and Lyle and Orlando and Eclypse and, of course, me among others, we went along for the ride. Now I was never completely on board with what you were selling so I don't really feel any major sense of betrayal when it comes to that department, but you really never did end up taking as big of a hit when that whole Order thing collapsed. You went on to headline WrestleManias and win King of the Ring and continue to march these people along with this whole messed up pied piper schtick. That's not really fair, now is it? It's about time I get around to doing what I should've done a long time ago and that's finally knocking you off this throne of yours. Now seeing as you look ready and willing to get physical, I don't see a reason why you can't meet me in that ring later and you can try to shut me up. I have nothing left to fear from you, Haven. I...have been set free."

That's the third person in the last few weeks who's used that phrase. What the hell is going on? Well we can't worry about that right now as Quinten takes his leave and Haven is left to think about what was just said.

First Match: Adam Hail and Lonny Richards vs. Simon Bennett and Mathias
Paul Andrews speaks for Simon and wants Adam Hail to know that he can have his retribution if he really wants it. Simon Bennett is offering Hail a one-on-one match between the two of them at Bragging Rights. It's high time that things get settled because Simon isn't going to stop. Adam has nobody else but himself to blame for his headaches right now, but if he's so sure of himself and his goal to get to the top of the mountain is a surefire thing, he should have no problem accepting this match. A great match rating here with an 80% crowd reaction to remind me that these guys aren't rocking it in the charisma department. This match is costing me at least half a million to put on so it'd better be fucking good and the crowd had better appreciate it. Simon is a house afire and gets all up in everyone's business off the hot tag. Hail evidently thinks it's too much for him to handle for now and he decides to bail and call it a night and get counted out. No doubt this isn't over. ****1/2, 90% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Has Luscious with him, of course, as he feels that last night wasn't enough to celebrate all of the Slammys that the two of them acquired. "I mean, there was indeed a lot of celebrating all night. You'd think the two of us would be too tired to even show up here tonight, but never let it be said that Michael Hotbody isn't full of energy! I'm a walking, living, breathing dynamo and I lit up all of 2040! The Energizer Bunny has got nothing on me. And may I just say that bunnies of any sort have got NOTHING on dear, dear Luscious over here."
`
Luscious blushes and fans herself with her hands at that comment as Hotbody presses on. "So tonight, I am proud to present to all of you a special in-depth edition of the Hot Button, as we take a look at our awards and reflect on our success and what it is about us that led us to win these prestigious accolades. I know you're all chomping at the bits so let's get this show on the road. Bring them on down, boys!"

A music cue hits and one-by-one, Zed Jones and Galino & Farnes each bring down a Slammy on a mobile pedestal with Hotbody naming each one as he and Luscious look on with tears in their eyes. The Douche of the Year Slammy is covered with a piece of paper taped on with MOST ENVIED written on it in marker. Hotbody asks us all to bask in the beauty of them all. "It's the culmination of hard work and grit and determination that makes one the best in their chosen field. The only tragedy that one can and should find in all of this is that there is one particular Slammy missing and THAT'S THE CRUISERWEIGHT OF THE YEAR! Jordan Demiras, you know that deep down in your black soul, in your selfish unloving heart, you have no right to claim that award. Rest assured that I have my TOP LEGAL COUNSEL working on finding any irregularities! I don't know if it's a case of ballot stuffing, or Lisa Benton pulling some nonsense, or you people not knowing how a poll works, but there isn't any other person on this roster other than me that can say they were the best cruiserweight of the whole year. None of them have this belt around them and none of them are going to take it from me anytime soon! So to Jordan Demiras, I say you can choke on that statue and to Gavin Jones, good freaking luck because it's going to be one hell of a disappointment come Bragging Rights! Look at all you see before you, Gavin, and tremble!"

This is obviously the time for the number one contender himself to sneak up from behind the champion. Gavin spins Hotbody around and delivers a boot to the mid-section and Gavin sends Hotbody flying over the top, knocking over the pedestals and awards. Luscious bails and that leaves Gavin alone in the ring with the title belt. He hoists it up briefly before taking his leave through the crowd as Hotbody and crew start to recover.

Backstage, Sophie Waters is with the Academy who feel the need to unleash on Brooke and company. Justin Mitchell and Randy Ellis came to the realization that Brooke needed them way more than they ever needed Brooke. They're still up for a fight against Ronnie Costello and Salvatore Scabbia, but they feel the need to make this statement: there's always time for anyone thinking about abandoning that ship.

Second Match: Jason Sorola vs. Nigel Gallagher
It's rebuilding time for Sorola as he's coming off a pretty substantial loss on Monday. SmackDown! can always stand some hot cruiserweight action. I need to brainstorm his next feud. In the meantime, he can help rock this match like a hurricane. The match ends when Sorola yanks Nigel off the top rope by his leg and the Englishman hits hard. Sorola locks in the STF and that's going to give him the submission win. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Once again we go backstage where we see Cameron Harper looking dejected and disappointed. He runs into Jake Connelly, who he says he's been looking for. Connelly asks why Harper is sulking. Harper answers that he feels like he let Jake Connelly down. First, he couldn't win the Intercontinental Title on Raw. Then he couldn't win the Slammy for Rookie of the Year. Harper was really hoping to impress Connelly and it all blew up in his face.

Connelly tries his hand at reassurance and says that he's not disappointed in Harper at all. He says that what Harper did on Raw was bold. It got people talking and they had to pay attention. As far as the Slammy goes, it might sting a little, but think about what some proper guidance can do for Harper in the next year. Harper is surprised at this line of conversation and asks if Connelly is saying what he thinks he's saying. Connelly offers a handshake and says that while he has nothing on him right now to make it official, he would be elated to have Harper on board as a client. Harper is ecstatic and accepts the handshake and declares that Connelly will not regret this. The two take their leave as we head back to the ring for the next match.

Third Match: The Perfections vs. The Glamour Brigade
The Perfections need MOMENTUM as they have a date with destiny at Bragging Rights against the Women's Tag Team Champions. All four women bring it like their jobs are counting on it and thus we have a fucking sweet match. It comes to an end when Bonnie manages to hot shot Arianna on the top rope and that leaves her open to the Bluebonnet from Bonnie to pick up the win. Nathan Quinn starts to make his way down and Paul Andrews moves to intercept but that allows the Southern Belles to sneak in from behind their challengers and lay them out with belt shots. This is getting ugly between these two teams. ****1/2, 93% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time this time with Chris Collins. Collins begins by saying that he has defined his entire WWE career by making sure he is not lost in the quagmire. There is an entire locker room of some of the best this business has to offer and it's easy to get overlooked. "I have done what I can to keep my name on the tips of all of your tongues. I embarrassed and beat up my own father for crying out loud! Unfortunately, it seems like all I've been doing these past few months is struggling to keep my head above water. Well last night was the first step in me changing all of that. Tonight, is step two. Now it's far too late for me to do anything about the main event for Bragging Rights; that's already locked in and set. But I can do something about another title and seeing as how the man who wears that gold has been happily throwing it down this past week, I can't help but wonder if he's still game. So Seth Von Kamp, I hope you're listening, because I'm making my move. I am daring you to accept my challenge to face me at Bragging Rights and put that Intercontinental Title on the line. Seth, I know you like nobody else. We once rode into battle at each other's side. A lot has changed since then, but I know you're a proud man. I expect an answer soon, and I hope for your sake that you don't disappoint me."

Well, Collins isn't going to have to wait long as Seth's music hits and the Intercontinental Champion makes his way out onto the stage. He stares at Collins for a bit before nodding and raising the title over his head with one hand. Looks like we've got another match set for the PPV!

Fourth Match: Haven vs. Quinten McDaniels
Quinten gets back on the mic and says that he hopes Haven accepts this challenge. Haven has gone on for too long without punishment and Quinten feels like he needs to tackle this one gaping wound from his past before he can really move on. Haven can forget about Victor Dark, Andrea, Hugo, or whoever the hell else. Quinten is the man to worry about!

The music of Haven hits as evidently the Dark Shepherd will be accepting this challenge. They get right to it as Quinten seems to be reinvigorated. It was a pretty hefty loss at Survivor Series, but it appears he's not letting it get to him. It's a solid heavyweight slugfest, but things are about to get worse for Haven. He gets Quinten by the throat and looks to deliver something devastating but CHET MORRIS RUNS IN FROM BEHIND!!! He's got a chair and smacks Haven across the back with it. That's going to be a DQ but that's of no concern to neither Quinten or Chet. Quinten holds Haven and that allows Chet to deliver some more shots to Haven's mid-section. Victor Dark makes his way out onto the stage and observes the 2-on-1 beatdown with a smirk on his face. What the hell is the deal with guy? Quinten and Chet eventually take their leave as once again Haven has been left brutalized. *****, 94% overall.

Fifth Match: Jenna Kyle vs. Vivian Merrick
The Women's Champion and Woman of the Year Sonya Braddock joins the commentary team to observe this match. She's congratulated on her Slammy win and Sonya responds by saying it'll look great with the one she's going to win next year. She's asked about Naomi's injury and she replies by pointing out how much it sucks that she's not going to be able to knock her ass out again anytime soon. Naomi only needs to worry about getting better because despite the fight that Jenna Kyle is going to bring at Bragging Rights, Sonya is still going to be waiting for Naomi if she wants to take another shot at taking the title.

The match at hand, though, is all kinds of awesome. I often forget that Vivian is also a worker despite being a manager to the Future Foundation. Jenna BUILDS MOMENTUM by picking up a hell of a hard-fought win by nailing the Kyle Driver and scoring the pinfall. She has a staredown with Sonya Braddock as the champion looks on from the announce table. *****, 95% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Kerry Cemenko vs. Wrakk
If I'm going to have Kerry talk a big game, I should probably be sticking him in some high profile spots. This main event should do nicely. Wrakk is, of course, his dominating self. Kerry manages to escape the Demon Cross and gets the champion down in position for a Curb Stomp but Brandon Reigns is at ringside and he trips up Kerry as he goes to the ropes. That's a DQ as Reigns climbs in to deliver some more abuse. Things look bad for Cemenko BUT HERE COMES RYAN PATTILLO!!! He evens the odds as he tosses Reigns out and slugs it out with Wrakk. Cemenko recovers and he and Pattillo team up to clothesline Wrakk over the top rope. We go off the air with the four men exchanging gestures and threats. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

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I had to look up Athena and to say I'm scared would be an understatement. You may not need Kong after all. I, on the other hand, need more Toni in my life.

How is this ROH deal supposed to be working? Do people just go back and forth as they please or is a title necessary? The pieces are there to do a big time promotion vs. promotion angle if you were so inclined.

LOL, OMG @ Maria Kinellis. I remember your crush on her. I wonder if she has any regrets and hard feelings seeing Punk happily married. Forget Matt and Jeff; SHE'S the big shock to me if she's still sticking her hand in wrestling these days. I would've thought Matt and Jeff would be two of the most over members of the roster and boost that rating a bit more. Still, this was nothing to sneeze at.

Madison Rayne is another blast from the past. I'd give her a blast, I tell you what.

Abrahantes is a new last name that I've never heard. I imagine him ending up in Vince Land being named Abraham Alexanderson. Mark Henry doing interviews still continues to be funny. It's just a weird visual to imagine.

La Sombra translates to "the shade" so it's safe to say that Andrade threw some shade on him. :shifty: Dalton has a cool name and it would fit well for a manager.

I'm going to try to be an adult about the slapping meat line. Big beefy men reaching four stars is a rarity so enjoy it when it happens. I'd make Cobb's finisher the Tossed Salad. Hey, I said I was going to be an adult about the meat thing. I didn't say anything about anything else.

This is some old school Undertaker/Mankind/Jake Roberts stuff. I try my best to do this kind of thing with Haven, but it's always a chore because there's a certain way to do stuff like this without it sounding hokey.

Shawn Spears has a good name. I'd book him as a Britney fanboy who's way too obsessed and went the extra mile to change his last name to match hers. God damn, I can be stupid when I really put my mind to it, so to speak.

It sucks that my flame for real world wrestling is dead and gone because I just know Punk would be bringing the goods just like this promo. It just feels so odd how some indy schmuck from over 20 years ago now has the ability to command so much attention and conversation...even from people who want to claim that he sucks and isn't worth shit.

I could go either way on the name Juice Robinson. Of course, it could be an easy target for ridicule if the guy was ripped and overly muscular. But when you're racking up ratings like that, what does it matter? One of my favorite eye-rolling things of EWR is when you have an established team on a show and your road agent is apparently gobsmacked over how well they mesh and work together. It's like, how much am I paying you again?

I'm assuming you are going for some sort of a stable formation with everybody dropping the "set free" line, and I'm all for it. The slow realization that all of these folks are up to something is good shit.

Always have a soft spot for heels getting themselves counted out. It's a well you can't go to too often and I feel like, in kayfabe, there should be some level of financial incentive tied to every match. Even if not explicitly stated, there's a winner's purse and that's reason enough for heels to not just skirt there way out of every match they're in.

But then you have a deeply personal rivalry where someone just says "nah I'm good" and the countout hits different.

Really good shit as you'd expect. Hotbody is now up to a whopping 4 and a half lines of an intro even on my large gaming monitor, so if I read this thread on my phone it's probably take up the whole screen. Covering up Douche of the Year is just classic.

At this stage I feel like Hotbody's eventual dethroning could be saved for a WrestleMania moment, but he's run through nearly everyone so I'm not entirely sure who will get the honor. I firmly enjoy this angle.

I like the simplicity here. Sometimes guys are just between feuds and you need to keep them busy, and that's fine. That's where the hypothetical, unspoken winner's purse comes into play. You get yourself a good match to keep yourself going and that's good enough.

I've said it before but I just love the ability to freely move people from wrestling to managing, and am just as happy sticking people into a "Manager" spot if I want to ensure they're standing there at ringside for any teammates or partners. EWR doesn't really know the difference between the roles.

Good to see Jenna BUILD MOMENTUM. I would like to BUILD MOMENTUM in my personal courtship of her.

If this were mid-2000s WWE, Toni and Athena would having an ass-and-thigh contest. Not saying I wouldn't like to see that, but I'm glad to have women in the business now who are both hot and kick ass.

So ROH was owned by Sinclair broadcasting. Once COVID hit the company more or less went dormant aside from a few shows in 2021, and the word was that Sinclair was looking to dump it.

Tony Khan proceeded to buy ROH in 2022, including the entire tape library which has led to some cool callbacks, like CM Punk entering to AFI's Miseria Cantare for a PPV match. Sinclair didn't include any TV deals in the buyout however. Tony's claimed he's searching for a cable deal for them, but he's been saying that for so long now I don't know it'll happen.

Instead, he re-opened the Honor Club (ROH's streaming service), made the entire back catalog available and new episodes of ROH stream weekly. They generally tape ROH either before/after Dynamite, or do standalone tapings in Universal.

There are no roster rules with ROH, anyone is free to go and most of the titles are held by main AEW roster talent, though I'm currently offloading the belts. Technically, I could've set up a 4th weekly TV show for ROH in-game. But that's just far too much weekly booking, plus it would mess with the in-game morale mechanics to have a 4th show.

But in real life most ROH matches feature undercard guys or developmental guys. So I turned ROH into my Development Fed in-game. I will shuffle people back and forth from there as needed, obviously if the game decides you can't possibly improve and I still can't use you, you'll be on your way out.

Maria's still around and still fine as fuck.

https://wrestlingnews.co/.image/ar_1...he-kingdom.jpg

That is a 41-year old woman whose given birth twice. Not bad. Not bad at all. She's married to Mike Bennett (on the right). Been with him since 2011 so she moved on from Punk without issue.

https://ewrestling.com/wp-content/up...atchphrase.jpg

Henry's a pretty fun interviewer. The aesthetic they were going for with Rampage for a while is he'd always do an interview before the main event, and it would be a split-screen style deal like you'd see in a sporting event.


I was genuinely impressed by the promo the chatbot spit out. I asked for dark and brooding and god dammit, they gave me dark and brooding!


Juice has some pretty decent size to him, and he's got a big personality and solid charisma. Real good over-the-top obnoxious kinda character but knows how to get serious when the time calls.

Also, he's married to Toni Storm so he's clearly got something going for him.

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LOL, I checked my Merchandise section and of all the fucking people on my roster to be in the top ten, there's God damn Ethan Lang at number 7. The motherfucker isn't even close to the other people on the list in terms of overness and his charisma sucks dong. WTF are you smoking, EWR? :lol:

Does he have the Fonz Factor or have any sort of an outlandish gimmick? I've never paid too much attention to the merch section but I could see why someone "cool" would do well with merch.

Forbidden Door coming shortly.

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Holy shit, he does have the Fonz Factor!!! That's probably why I picked him up in the first place. :lol:

https://i.imgur.com/5WEAzKW.png

So before I post this afternoon I'm going to add some disclaimers and say this pre-emptively about Forbidden Door...this is probably the closest I will get to having an "M-A-G" level show. I have a great base roster but most shows won't be this good because they aren't interpromotional spectaculars.

1. The NJPW guys I booked for this are largely their top guys. First off they are very talented. Very high brawl numbers generally (Japanese Strong Style), and some solid technical skills for many of them. But also pretty reasonably over even compared to my midcarders (most of the guys booked are around low 80s overness, except Okada who is legit main event 90+ overness level)

2. The overness ratings being that high is up for debate, casual WWE fans won't know these guys. BUT, I'd argue, in today's wrestling landscape the vast majority of people who attend shows are smarks but that's doubly so for AEW, the indies, etc. Basically if you booked a major NJPW name on any random show and promoted it accordingly, chances are a lot of people there would pop and know these guys.

3. As a result of the above, this show rules tons of ass and even though this card would bang in real life I'm not sure it'd get this many snowflakes in a row.

4. Technically I could "cheat" in this game by using these talented and over NJPW guys all over my programming year-round. Since the only times they are unavailable to me is when NJPW's touring commitments are happening. But that's not reflective of the real-life working relationship between the companies. NJPW guys make sporadic appearances outside of Forbidden Door season, and even then, the very top level guys don't usually come over. Most of them live in Japan and the real-life NJPW schedule is far longer than it is in EWR.

5. Even if I did "cheat" by booking them most of the year, I'd be in financial ruin. Case in point, there are 9 NJPW talents wrestling on this show, plus Jeff Cobb on Collision. According to my finance page, my workers costs so far this month is $406,000. Well, that only accounts for Open contract guys used so far, so that's those 10 guys. The money I brought in for PPV revenue? $405,000. So basically the guys paid for themselves for this show, but if I booked them constantly I'd go broke, especially with Okada charging like $85k per appearance.

6. As a Global promotion I can't even sign anyone with Japanese commitments to contracts, even on Open deals. The NJPW roster was on the AEW roster on open deals in my game save. There's a chance when the month ends, everyone from NJPW will make a mass exodus. Not sure if that happens. They might also quit working for me if I don't book them since they aren't earning money. If this happens I might just Arsenic them onto my roster for next Forbidden Door season but it otherwise changes nothing about my day-to-day booking of the promotion.

TLDR; a 20-year old game unsurprisingly does not really lend itself to the modern workings of a wrestling promotion :lol:

https://cdn-az.allevents.in/events5/...g?v=1685554328

<b>AEW/NJPW Forbidden Door
June 25, 2023
Scotiabank Arena, Toronto, ON</b>

Tony Schiavone and Excalibur welcome us to the proceedings as the early arriving crowd is already in a frenzy. Let Scott Keith, Dave Meltzer, and everyone else run out of stars before the night is over! But before the main show kicks off, we have Zero Hour!

---

<b>Zero Hour - ROH Pure Championship: "Red Death" Daniel Garcia vs. "The Wrestler" Katsuyori Shibata</b>

As the lights dimmed in the jam-packed arena, the thrilling anticipation rippled through the crowd. The stage was set for a brutal clash of two renowned wrestlers, Daniel Garcia, the defending ROH Pure Champion, and the challenger, Katsuyori Shibata. Known for their hard-hitting styles and relentless grappling skills, both wrestlers promised a match that would leave the audience on the edge of their seats.

The bell rang, and the match got underway. Garcia, calm and focused, circled Shibata, analyzing his opponent's movements, ready to seize any hint of vulnerability. Shibata, on the other hand, exuded an air of relentless determination. The intensity in the ring was palpable.

The first part of the match was a grappling masterclass. Garcia, known for his remarkable technical wrestling skills, locked Shibata in a series of innovative submissions, trying to force the challenger to tap out early. However, Shibata's endurance and resilience shone through, as he tenaciously wriggled free from each hold, much to the crowd's astonishment.

Shibata, renowned for his striking prowess, retaliated with a series of stiff elbow strikes, each blow resonating through the arena like a gunshot. Garcia absorbed the punishment, gritting his teeth, refusing to stay down. Back-and-forth they went, exchanging punishing blows and complex submission holds, each wrestler looking to gain the upper hand.

The end came after an exhausting, high-intensity encounter. Shibata, summoning his last ounces of strength, struck Garcia with his feared finisher, the Penalty Kick. The sound of his boot connecting with Garcia echoed throughout the arena, followed by a gasp from the crowd. Garcia fell to the mat, unable to rise, and the referee counted the pin. 1...2...3!

With that, Katsuyori Shibata was declared the new ROH Pure Champion. The crowd erupted, acknowledging the amazing display of technical mastery and brutal toughness. Despite the loss, Garcia's stock had only risen after the incredible match. Both warriors had pushed each other to their limits, creating a contest that would perfectly set the tone for the show ahead.

<b>Winner and NEW ROH Pure Champion: Katsuyori Shibata
***
73% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 1 - Title for Title: ROH Television Champion "The Samoan Submission Machine" Samoa Joe vs. IWGP Television Champion Zack Sabre Jr.</b>

The crowd is still buzzing from the opening pyro detonations as Samoa Joe's music hits. The arena darkened once again to herald the arrival of Joe, smugly and confidently walking to the ring after his impromptu title defense not even 24 hours ago. Samoa Joe, the ROH Television Champion, squared off against IWGP Television Champion, Zack Sabre Jr. This encounter promised to be a submission spectacle.

The bell tolled, and both champions eyed each other, circling around the ring with the gaze of eagles. The initial few minutes of the match were a slow, meticulous dance, a chess match where each participant was sizing the other up, looking for a chink in their armor to exploit.

Joe, the embodiment of power and intensity, swiftly gained momentum with a flurry of high-impact moves. His explosive chops echoed through the arena, each landing with resounding thuds on Sabre's chest. The ROH Champion's goal was clear: wear Sabre down, sap his strength, and lock in the feared Coquina Clutch.

But Sabre was not to be underestimated. The IWGP Champion, known for his unparalleled technical skills, parried Joe's onslaught with an impressive array of submission holds. Arm-bars, leg-locks, and intricate choke holds were dished out with surgical precision, turning the match into a masterclass of grappling artistry.

The climax came in a stunning and unexpected sequence. Joe, sensing victory, managed to lock Sabre in a headlock and seemed poised to transition into his signature Coquina Clutch. The crowd held its breath, anticipating Sabre's imminent defeat. But the resilient Brit had one final trick up his sleeve.

Demonstrating his agility and quick-thinking, Sabre used the ring to his advantage and maneuvered towards the turnbuckle, using his feet to jump off and flip over Joe's head, turning it into a flash pin. The referee hit the mat. 1...2...3! Against all odds, Sabre had reversed the tide and emerged victorious.

The crowd erupted in thunderous applause as Sabre was declared the winner, now holding both the ROH and IWGP Television Championships. The match proved to be a technical spectacle and a testament to the cunning and guile of Zack Sabre Jr. As Sabre leaves with his two championships, Joe is left gob-smacked in the ring, pounding the mat in frustration.

<b>Winner, still IWGP Television Champion and NEW ROH Television Champion: Zack Sabre Jr.
****
83% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 2 - Jon Moxley vs. "Stone Pitbull" Tomohiro Ishii</b>

As the dust settled from the prior contest, a sense of foreboding and raw energy filled the air. This was no ordinary match. It was a clash of titans. Two men known for their brutality, their tenacity, and their complete disregard for their own wellbeing: Jon Moxley and Tomohiro Ishii.

The match began with a roaring bell, and the audience could immediately feel the visceral tension between the two gladiators. It was evident that this would not be a contest of finesse or high-flying acrobatics, but a brutal, punishing display of sheer willpower and resilience.

Their hard-hitting strong style approach was evident from the get-go. Each punch, each knee, each stinging chop was met with a defiant retort from the other. Neither was willing to back down, their attacks echoing throughout the arena like war drums.

The action soon spilled out of the ring, as both Moxley and Ishii began brawling with unchained ferocity amongst the ringside area. Ishii, ever the bruiser, relentlessly assaulted Moxley, his blows pushing Moxley into the barricade landing with brutal precision. But Moxley absorbed the punishment, his bloodied face a testament to his indomitable spirit.

The match eventually made its way back into the ring, with Moxley's bleeding getting worse. Blood trickled down his face, his battle-scarred visage the personification of his warrior spirit. Yet, he continued to fight, his resilience further cementing his reputation as one of the toughest men in professional wrestling.

The climax of the match came when Moxley, his face a mask of crimson, managed to hook Ishii under his arms. With a roar that echoed through the arena, he drove Ishii into the mat with the Paradigm Shift. The impact shook the ring, and the audience watched with bated breath as the referee counted. 1...2...3!

Despite the grueling brutality of the match, Moxley had emerged victorious. The crowd erupted into thunderous applause, acknowledging the breathtaking spectacle they had just witnessed. It was a match that embodied the spirit of wrestling: raw, intense, and completely unforgettable. A testament to the tenacity of both men, it was a reminder of why Jon Moxley and Tomohiro Ishii are regarded as two of the toughest men in the business.

<b>Winner: Jon Moxley
****1/2
89% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 3 - AEW International Championship: "Freshly Squeezed" Orange Cassidy (C) vs. "The King" Minoru Suzuki</b>

After the sheer brutality of the prior bout, the tone shifted as the ever-enigmatic Orange Cassidy, the AEW International Champion, sauntered out to the ring, his casual nonchalance a stark contrast to the storm about to break. The storm had a name: Minoru Suzuki, a name synonymous with brutality and a reputation that commanded fear and respect in equal measure.

From the outset, the juxtaposition of styles was as stark as night and day. Cassidy, renowned for his laid-back approach, and Suzuki, the embodiment of relentless aggression. Cassidy left his signature sunglasses on, kept his hands in his pockets, and started with his signature slow kick spot, trying to offset the rhythm of the match. But Suzuki was not to be swayed.

Ignoring the mind games, Suzuki retaliated with a resounding forearm that rocked Cassidy to the ground, a shocking exclamation point that even broke Cassidy's glasses. This brutal awakening seemed to flip a switch in Cassidy. The comedic antics vanished, replaced by a determination that surprised the crowd and perhaps even Suzuki himself.

The rest of the match saw Cassidy, usually the master of minimal effort, take the fight to Suzuki in earnest. The man known for his sloth-like approach now moved with purpose, utilizing a mix of unorthodox offense and technical wrestling that kept Suzuki on the back foot.

The end came when Cassidy, with a surge of adrenaline, hit Suzuki with his finisher, the Beach Blast. The audience counted along with the referee, their voices echoing in unison. 1...2...3! Cassidy had defended his championship, once again proving that he could get serious when needed and continuing his run of maintaining the gold even in the face of brutal punishment.

In the aftermath of the match, a shocking development unfolded. Suzuki, known for his lack of respect for his defeated opponents, extended his hand to Cassidy. The crowd hushed in disbelief as Cassidy, equally surprised, accepted the gesture. This unexpected display of sportsmanship from Suzuki was the perfect end to a match that proved the mettle of both men and showcased the unpredictable and diverse nature of professional wrestling.

<b>Winner and STILL AEW International Champion: Orange Cassidy
***1/4
81% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 4: CM Punk vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi</b>

There's no rest for the crowd in this one. Onto a dream match between two legends of the wrestling world, CM Punk and Hiroshi Tanahashi. The Best in the World vs. The Ace of New Japan. The match was a year in the making, initially slated for the previous year's Forbidden Door event. However, an injury to Punk had derailed their encounter, turning the dream match into a 'what could have been'.

Both Punk and Tanahashi entered the ring to an explosive ovation. There were no titles at stake like there would have been a year ago, but the prestige of victory in this battle of titans was reward enough. From the opening bell, both men showed why they are considered among the best in the business, putting on a spectacular display of athleticism and in-ring psychology.

The crowd was thoroughly engaged, every near-fall, every reversal met with a chorus of cheers and gasps. Tanahashi and Punk fought tooth and nail, each landing their signature moves to the delight of the audience. But the turning point came as Tanahashi went for his signature High Fly Flow.

As Tanahashi launched himself from the top rope, Punk managed to get his knees up at the last second, causing Tanahashi to crash and burn. Capitalizing on the situation, Punk quickly hit his Go To Sleep (GTS) finisher on the fallen Tanahashi. The referee's count followed: 1...2...3! Punk was declared the winner of this highly-anticipated bout.

Following the match, a show of respect was seen as the two icons shook hands in the center of the ring. Tanahashi exited, leaving Punk alone to soak up the applause. But the moment was shattered when Samoa Joe, still seething from his earlier loss, stormed the ring and blindsided Punk.

Joe's assault was brutal, and it took multiple officials to pull him off Punk. The turn of events left the crowd booing, a stark contrast to the loud cheers just moments before. Despite the tumultuous ending, the showdown between Punk and Tanahashi would undoubtedly go down as one of the most memorable matches of the evening, a testament to their enduring legacy in the world of professional wrestling.

<b>Winner: CM Punk
****1/4
92% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 5 - IWGP United States Heavyweight Championship: Kenny Omega vs. "The Aerial Assassin" Will Ospreay</b>

The atmosphere in the arena was electric as the fifth match of the night was set to commence. In this battle, Canada's very own Kenny Omega, the IWGP United States Champion, prepared to defend his title against the spectacular high-flyer, Will Ospreay. The stakes were high, the tension palpable, as this was a rematch of their epic clash at Wrestle Kingdom earlier in the year - a match hailed as one of the best in recent memory.

Before proceedings could begin, Don Callis made his way out from behind the apron to massive boos and even chants of "fuck you Callis" from the crowd. Callis took a seat on the commentary desk, seemingly disowning his own Canadian brethren, calling them classless heathens. He's here for one reason and one reason only - to insult Omega on commentary.

Omega, the hometown hero, was received with thunderous applause as he made his entrance, his every move accompanied by the roar of the excited crowd. Across the ring, Ospreay, a human highlight reel, accepted the challenge, his steely gaze fixed on the championship he so eagerly desired.

Once the bell rang, the ring came alive with an awe-inspiring blend of jaw-dropping aerial maneuvers and hard-hitting blows. Ospreay demonstrated his mastery of high-flying offense, his every leap and flip defying gravity, while Omega showcased his potent mix of powerful strikes and exceptional technical prowess.

The decisive moment came when Omega hoisted Ospreay onto his shoulders, ready to deliver his infamous One Winged Angel. The crowd held its breath, fully expecting to see Omega seal his victory. However, Ospreay proved his mettle by fighting his way out of the precarious position and landing a precise strike that sent Omega staggering into the ropes. Ospreay lands awkwardly, on landing, forcing the referee to check on him.

All of a sudden, one of the New Japan cameramen, wearing a COVID mask, clocked Omega with his camera! What in the world? Ospreay, seeing what transpired, quickly waved off the ref and regained his composure. Seizing the opportunity, Ospreay capitalized on the distraction and landed the Stormbreaker, his signature move. The referee counted - 1...2...3! Will Ospreay has won back the IWGP United States title, in Omega's home country!

But the surprises weren't over. As Ospreay celebrated his victory, the masked cameraman revealed himself to be none other than Konosuke Takeshita. Of course it was Takeshita! He has ensured Ospreay steals the title from Omega.

Takeshita continues to put the boots to Omega as the crowd boos. Ospreay joins in, making it a 2-on-1 situation. All of a sudden, a golden star appears on the video board. HOLY FUCK, IT'S KOTA IBUSHI!!!!!!!

The crowd loses its collective shit as Kenny Omega's long-time tag team partner from Japan rushes the ring and sends the heels packing with a mixture of lariats and knees. He helps to bring Kenny to his feet as they embrace. The Golden Lovers have reunited!

<b>Winner and NEW IWGP United States Heavyweight Champion: Will Ospreay
****
86% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 6 - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship: Adam Cole vs. "Cold Skull" SANADA (C)</b>

It's weird to imagine a World title match being something of a cooldown bout, but boy do the crowd ever need a collective cigarette after that moment. But we must press on! Adam Cole, a charismatic force of energy, sought to challenge the icy composure of the reigning IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, SANADA. The stakes were enormous, the tension thick, as both wrestlers prepared for a match that could define their careers.

Cole started the match by firing up the crowd, his every gesture and word drawing them in. His infectious energy was a stark contrast to SANADA's icy calm. SANADA, despite being cast as the heel, opted to fight a clean match, seeking to unequivocally prove his superiority through pure wrestling skill and strategy.

The bell rang, and the battle for supremacy began in earnest. It was a contest of equal matches, with neither wrestler gaining a decisive upper hand. Each move, each counter, seemed to be met with an equally powerful response. Cole's fiery passion clashed with SANADA's cool determination, creating a riveting spectacle of athleticism and strategy.

The match swung back and forth, a brutal ballet of power moves, technical finesse, and high-flying stunts. However, the end came when SANADA managed to lock Cole into his dreaded submission move, the Skull End. Despite his best efforts, Cole found himself unable to escape. After a valiant struggle, Cole had no choice but to tap out, awarding the match and title retention to SANADA.

The crowd erupted in applause, recognizing the fantastic display of wrestling they had just witnessed. While Cole's quest for the championship fell short, his performance against SANADA only solidified his reputation as one of the best in the business. As for SANADA, he proved that he was a champion who could defend his title with honor and skill, standing tall in the ring as the true IWGP World Heavyweight Champion and proving that his run to the top of the New Japan ranks was no fluke.

<b>Winner and STILL IWGP World Heavyweight Champion: SANADA
****
84% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Match 7 - AEW World Championship: MJF (C) vs. Tetsuya Naito</b>

We continue on to the second of our World Title matches. This was a clash of personalities as the AEW World Champion, MJF, defended his title against Tetsuya Naito. MJF had made it clear before the match that he saw himself above this event, expressing disdain for having to defend his title against a New Japan Pro-Wrestling star. In contrast, Naito remained unphased, using his own brand of mind games to rile up the self-proclaimed "salt of the earth".

From the moment the bell rang, it was clear this was going to be a unique encounter. MJF's usual cocky demeanor was shaken by Naito's nonchalant attitude. The champion struggled to understand Naito's unorthodox approach, his every taunt met with a tranquil smirk or a dismissive gesture.

For as much as SANADA proved in the previous match that you can win a clean match even when you're not a fan favorite, MJF went for the complete opposite approach and opted to employ every underhanded tactic in the book. From distractions to attempted cheap shots, MJF did everything he could to retain his title, but Naito managed to thwart him at every turn.

The match reached its climax when Naito prepared to hit his finisher, Destino. However, MJF managed to shove Naito into the referee. The ref bump served to create the chaos he needed. With the official down, MJF took the opportunity to retrieve his Dynamite Diamond Ring hidden in his trunks.

MJF landed a punishing blow on Naito with the ring, sending him sprawling on the canvas. As the referee regained consciousness, MJF disposed of his illicit weapon. MJF covered Naito for the pin as the referee, unaware of the deceit, counted - 1...2...3!

Despite the boos from the crowd, MJF celebrated his underhanded victory, clutching his championship with a smug satisfaction. The match, while tainted by MJF's tactics, had still been an exciting back-and-forth affair, showcasing the diverse personalities and styles of AEW and NJPW's finest. The night was not over yet, but the controversy surrounding MJF's win would undoubtedly continue to fuel discussions long after the event's end.

<b>Winner and STILL AEW World Champion: MJF
****1/2
93% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Main Event - "The American Dragon" Bryan Danielson vs. "Rainmaker" Kazuchika Okada</b>

The final bout of the night was a dream match that had fans buzzing with anticipation since the inception of the AEW-NJPW partnership. Bryan Danielson, known worldwide as "The American Dragon", would face Kazuchika Okada, the "Rainmaker" and unquestionably the top NJPW star for over the past decade. Although there were no titles at stake, the magnitude of this encounter was so significant that both promotions agreed it deserved to close the show.

Before the match, Okada extended a hand in a show of sportsmanship. Danielson, however, dismissed him, setting the tone for the intense clash that was about to unfold. The ring was their battleground, and the crowd could not contain their excitement.

The match was a showcase of Danielson's ruthless aggression against Okada's unwavering resilience. Each move was delivered with precision and strength, with Danielson seeming to take a perverse joy in pushing Okada to his limits. Yet, Okada, who had battled against the very best in his illustrious career, remained undeterred. His every counter and offensive move resonated with the promise of a fightback.

The closing moments of the match were nothing short of dramatic. Danielson aimed for his Busaiku Knee, but Okada evaded it, retaliating with a massive running version of his infamous Rainmaker lariat. The crowd was on their feet as Okada proceeded to land not one, not two, but three consecutive Rainmakers on Danielson, an emphatic statement that silenced even the most skeptical of observers.

The referee's count followed: 1...2...3! Okada emerged victorious from the epic battle. The final image of the night was of golden streamers cascading from the ceiling, bathing the triumphant Okada in a sea of gold. The crowd erupted in cheers and applause, celebrating the victorious Rainmaker and the fantastic night of wrestling they had witnessed.

AEW/NJPW Forbidden Door 2023 concluded on this high note, and the fans knew they had witnessed a night that would be etched in the annals of wrestling history.

<b>Winner: Kazuchika Okada
****
89% overall rating

87% overall show rating</b>

Post-Show Notes:

-Dean Malenko praised several of the matchups, saying their styles blended together. No shit, Dean...it's almost like I researched the stats before I put the card together.

-Suzuki and Orange were the only match where the guys really didn't have THAT similar of styles, which was by design since that was meant to be a bizarre social experiment of a match I'd love to see in real life. And they're over so it worked. ***1/4 being the worst match on a loaded card is ridiculous.

-My one booking fuck-up was I accidentally got Suzuki docked overness. It wasn't because he lost to Orange (Oranges' overness rating is higher) but it's presumably because he did the handshake afterwards despite being a heel with a Bad Ass gimmick. Oops, please don't hurt me, Suzuki-san.

-The way the show was going I swear I was ready for Okada/Danielson to get to 5 stars. In hindsight, their stats are at least somewhat more different compared to some of the others on there. Plus add in MJF being like 97 over with 97 charisma and it being a world title match, I get it. Still, last year's show ended with an AEW Title match going on last with Mox going over Tanahashi, so it seemed fair to put a NJPW guy over in the finale. Plus in real life Danielson/Okada is happening Sunday and man I hope they close out the show.

-Speaking of fair, NJPW went 5-4 on the PPV but add Miro's win over Cobb and it's 5-5 on the weekend. Par for the course for an interpromotional arrangement. Last year's Forbidden Door featured a bunch of tags with guys mixed in from both promotions on each side so it wasn't a full-on promotion vs. promotion match like I was shooting for here.

-Following his surprise debut, Kota Ibushi has signed with AEW full-time. In real-life his NJPW contract expired this year, in this game data he's a free agent with no Japanese commitments, so I signed him on literal day one just waiting for this moment.

This post is sponsored by the patient in Operation
 

I have to laugh at a dude with the moniker of "The Wrestler". As opposed to what, the Bassist? :lol:

I have to ask if you went to the AI again to come up with the report because this was a very different presentation. Like there was an actual storytelling element to each match breakdown. That's quite scary when you think about it if that's the case. All you have to do is give the thing a few points and the thing churns out some great captivating shit.

I would absolutely play up Joe being angry over not being victorious on the same show where Punk stole the show and came out on top. I don't think there's a reason to not extend this program out, especially if you're not in a rush to do Punk/MJF. It's some easy stars at the very least.

But stars were definitely the theme with this show. Plus you got that overall rating in the high 80s, which is always a win. It blows that you can't get all of these guys locked down but if nothing else, it almost makes the show that much more special. I still remember my one SummerSlam show from way back when getting a 98% overall rating and I've been chasing it ever since.

The elusive 5-star match is the result of high stats, similar styles, charisma up the ass from both competitors, and good morale. In real life I imagine Danielson and Okada can get there in their sleep but this is the game we're talking about. It has its fickle moments and knows how to disappoint you in the worst ways.

A guy losing overness always hurts because you want to do what you can to get it back up and there's not always a guaranteed way to do it, other than a feud, but that takes a while. When I did the finish to Jenna/Faith in the Iron Woman Match, I knew the handshake was going to hurt Jenna because she was still a heel basically, but I was confident she'd regain those points with the face turn and subsequent feud against Naomi and Eclypse.

So with this show taken care of, and the fact that you need to do PPV events every month despite the real AEW not following the same format, what's next for you? Do you have your own names for the shows that aren't on the real life schedule?

I believe the moniker is primarily because Shibata was the definition of EWR's "No Gimmick Needed" gimmick. Wrestlers who work as young boys in the New Japan dojo always start off in plain black trunks and black boots, then go away on excursion to either the US, UK, or Mexico for a year or two and then return to NJPW with flashier attire and maybe a gimmick.

Shibata never did this, keeping the plain gear and just staying purely a wrestler. And a total shit-kicker at that.

If you ever think you're in pain, just watch highlights of Shibata vs. Okada and you'll remember it could always be worse.

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Yeah I figured PPVs called for longer than the quick TV write-ups. So I asked ChatGPT if it would be possible to recap of a hypothetical wrestling card one match at a time and it said yes, just give me the participants, outcome, and any specific spots.

So I did Shibata vs. Garcia first. Had it generate three different recaps for it, decided which one I liked the best and then responded to that one and said "this is exactly what I'm looking for, now onto the next match" and gave it the next match parameters etc.

It's really kinda fascinating to give it certain spots/tones etc and watching it "come to life". Obviously I did clean a few things up and add in some of my own stuff too but it made for a fantastic baseline.

I feel like the one advantage I have here is the AI knows these are actual wrestlers. So in knows the mannerisms, characters etc. Using AI to write results for your game would be near-impossible because you'd have to train it on all the characters. Although having it try its hand at a standalone Michael Hotbody promo would be kinda interesting.

Yeah I'm sorta imagining it being Punk wanting MJF but Joe being the roadblock he has to get through first. So figure Joe/Punk at the July "PPV" and then Punk/MJF in August.

If I could lock these guys down my game would basically become an NJPW game instead of an AEW game. I might book some underneath NJPW guys here and there and maybe bring in a big star or two for a major show if the calendar allows (August's PPV, in theory, is in Wembley Stadium which is the kinda show you go all out for) but otherwise I'll keep it realistic and keep most of these guys away until next year's Forbidden Door.

The game data I downloaded had the core AEW PPVs set as PPVs and then the other months had ROH PPVs as large events. But I'm not booking ROH.

Real-life AEW often will have one big "special" episode of Dynamite a month where the card feels like a mini-PPV on free TV. I might borrow some of those names for the new "PPVs" I set up. In my imagination, these might be bonus shows they stream on HBO Max or something vs. true PPVs. Like July can be Fight for the Fallen, which originated as an AEW PPV where all the proceeds went to gun violence. But yeah, the game will basically force me into running monthly PPVs.

August/September will be interesting to me because I believe the plan in real life is to run PPVs in consecutive weekends. Wembley (All In) the last weekend in August. But then the following weekend is Labor Day weekend where they do one of their core US PPVs (All Out). I'd presume it'll be like building a giant mega-card between the two shows. I'd expect the Wembley show to have more involvement with NJPW etc and be more like a super-show while the September show would be strictly AEW.

I think I'll try running it like that in my game too, the benefit is I'll then have a shitload of time before my October pseudo-PPV and my actual main November PPV (Full Gear).

https://cdn3.whatculture.com/images/...45-600x338.jpg

AEW Dynamite
June 28, 2023
Hamilton, ON, Canada

The crowd is still buzzing from Forbidden Door a few days ago, and one can only imagine how anyone could possibly top that show. But there's a whole locker room of talents willing to try.

<b>Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Men's First Round Match: Adam Cole vs. Daniel Garcia</b>

The Owen Hart Foundation Cup is back for a 2nd year as 8 men and 8 women will look to win their respective brackets and earn a future championship opportunity. The finals will be taking place July 23rd at Fight for the Fallen. As last year's winner, Adam Cole is the first man out of the box looking to repeat. He's got a first-round match against Daniel Garcia. Both men are coming off of losses at Forbidden Door, with this tournament giving them the opportunity to have quick turnaround of fortune.

These two have history with one another, meeting up in tag team action a few weeks ago with the Jericho Appreciation Society earning a cheap victory. Speaking of Jericho, the announcers remind viewers of Cole's brutal cage match victory over Jericho last week. Jericho seemingly walked out of an interview in stunned silence, and reportedly none of the other Jericho Appreciation Society members have seen him since.

Anyway, these guys have themselves a really nice back-and-forth match, showcasing a nice blend of speed and technical wrestling befitting of an Owen tribute. However, Cole manages to work Garcia down onto the mat long enough to lower The Boom and get the win. Clearly these guys have gotten the "try to keep the banger PPV quality matches going" memo. <b>****, 81% overall rating</b>

---

As Cole walks up the ramp to celebrate, the music of Dr. Britt Baker hits. Baker makes her way out for her match, giving Cole a smooch on the way out.

<b>Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Women's First Round Match: Dr. Britt Baker vs. Saraya w/ Ruby Soho</b>

Much like her beau Adam Cole, Britt Baker won the women's side of last year's Owen tournament, providing a nice visual for the crowd with the couple celebrating their newly won trophies. As last year's winner, she's also the first one out in her bracket this year. Tonight she is facing off against Saraya, who beat Britt in her AEW debut last fall.

Britt's had no shortage of issues with The Outcasts for several months now. Luckily for her, the Outcasts have also done a good job of pissing off most of the AEW women's roster in the process. Including referee Aubrey Edwards. Ruby Soho makes a nuisance of herself at ringside a few times behind Aubrey's back, but when she catches Ruby trying to help drag Saraya to the ropes during a submission hold, she gets thrown out in no time.

With Ruby ejected and Toni being tied up in other business, Saraya has no backup and no hope against a game and determined Saraya. The Lock Jaw submission is put on and Britt gets the first victory on her road to repeating. <b>***, 79% overall</b>

---

[The video opens to MJF sitting in a lavish home, his AEW World Title sitting prominently on a table next to him.]

MJF: Hello, AEW Universe. As you can see, I'm not there tonight. You see, I refused to spend one more second in Canada than I was contractually obligated to.

[He grins, crossing his arms. The crowd in the arena boos, both at the insult to Canada and at the gall of MJF to refer to an AEW crowd as the "AEW Universe".]

MJF: So here I am, back in the most magical place on earth, Long Island, resting and recuperating from my epic battle against Tetsuya Naito at Forbidden Door.

[He chuckles, shaking his head.]

MJF: Naito and his glorified indie fed, New Japan Pro-Wrestling, thought they could take me down. But guess what? Just like every other challenger, they failed. So, Naito, why don't you go back to your rinky-dink company and tell them who the real champion is.

[He lifts the AEW World Title and smirks.]

MJF: Now let's talk about CM Punk and his encounter with Samoa Joe. Punk, I told you to watch your back. But did you listen? No. Instead, you got choked out after your little match with Tanahashi. Have fun trying to calm down the Samoan Submission Machine.

[He laughs, leaning back in his chair.]

MJF: And then there's the Owen Hart Cup. Tony Khan trying to determine a number one contender for my title? It's all a big formality.

[He scoffs.]

MJF: No matter who comes out on top, they won't be on my level. They won't be able to touch me. Khan's just lucky I don't take the entire summer off and leave AEW without a world champion. Just like I might take this gorgeous belt with me wherever I may go in the Bidding War of 2024!

[He smiles, leaning towards the camera.]

MJF: So keep watching, AEW Universe. Keep cheering for your heroes. Because no matter who they are, they'll never be MJF.

[He raises his title one last time, the camera focusing on the gleaming gold before the video ends.]

---

<b>FTW Championship: "Jungle Boy" Jack Perry vs. "El Toro Blanco" Rush (C)</b>

This match just keeps the JungleHook vs. LFI feud plugging along nicely, with the face Perry trying to win the title that Rush stole from his friend. These two guys have clashing styles but in a way that actually benefits the match, with the smaller Perry selling like hell for Rush's stiff shots.

As the match winds down and Perry gains moment, Andrade saunters out to the ring to run interference but Hook is right behind him. Hook locks in the Redrum on Andrade at ringside as the crowd goes nuts. Unfortunately, these ringside happenings also distract referee Mike Posey, and he doesn't see Rush clock Perry with a chain. Rush steals the win. <b>***, 77% overall rating</b>

---

The scene transitions to Renee Paquette, the experienced wrestling journalist standing ready, microphone in hand. She is flanked by The Dark Order, each of them donning their characteristic masks and attire.

"Thank you, everyone. I'm here with The Dark Order, who have requested this time to speak," Renee begins. She turns towards Evil Uno. "So, what would you like to say?"

Before Evil Uno can respond, the shot of Adam Page comes into view. He walks into frame, his eyes focused on The Dark Order. "I've been looking all over for you guys since last week. I need to speak to you."

Evil Uno raises a hand, effectively silencing Page. "Save it, Hangman. You've already made your point clear," Uno states, his voice cold. "You teamed with The Elite against the Blackpool Combat Club. What? Didn't trust us to have your back like we always have?"

Page begins to speak, to defend his actions, but Uno doesn't let him. "We've noticed, Page," he continues, looking straight into the camera. "The Dark Order has been on a mean streak lately on Rampage. And now, we want to show you that you've placed your bet on the wrong group."

The camera zooms in on Uno's face, his eyes filled with determination. "Blackpool Combat Club," he calls out, "we challenge you. Next week. No disqualification, no holds barred, anything goes."

Page looks shocked, he tries to step in, to talk The Dark Order out of this reckless challenge, but they turn their backs on him, ignoring his words, leaving him behind as they march out of the frame, leaving Renee and a silenced Hangman in their wake. The camera lingers on Page's face, full of concern and regret, before the scene fades to black.

---

<b>TNT Championship: Lance Archer w/ Jake Roberts vs. Wardlow (C) w/ Arn Anderson</b>

Wardlow vs. Lance Archer was exactly as advertised - a match between two big, yet also surprisingly agile hosses. These guys gelled really well and got the crowd engaged in the action in the ring. Meanwhile, fans got a nice burst of nostalgia outside of it as Arn Anderson and Jake "The Snake" Roberts got into a shouting match. Fans were eagerly awaiting to see the legends throw down, although it ultimately did not come to blows.

In the ring, Archer gets Wardlow up for a Blackout but he manages to slide loose, hit the ropes and then run through Archer with a big lariat. He goes up the top and hits an impressive Senton, followed by a Powerbomb for the win. Wardlow keeps his hoss winning streak intact while Jake the Snake is pissed off at ringside. The only question now is who's next for Wardlow? <b>***, 74% overall</b>

---

The AEW arena is charged with energy as the titantron flickers to life. Christian Cage, with Luchasaurus towering behind him, appears on the screen. A smug smile plays on Christian's face as the audience reacts with a mix of cheers and boos. The music fades, and he begins to speak, his voice cutting through the crowd noise.

Christian Cage: "Well, well, well... If it isn't the AEW International Champion, Orange Cassidy. The 'King of Sloth Style', the man who's held onto that title for nearly a year now. I gotta hand it to you, Cassidy. You've gone up against some of the toughest men in this business and still managed to keep that title around your waist. Hell, even Minoru Suzuki seemed to give you a nod of respect at Forbidden Door."

Christian pauses, his smirk growing wider as he leans closer to the camera.

Christian Cage: "But let me make one thing perfectly clear, Cassidy... You may have fooled some people with your gimmicks and your aviators, but you haven't fooled me. You haven't earned my respect."

Christian's voice lowers, and the intensity in his eyes becomes more pronounced.

Christian Cage: "You see, I've been in this business long enough to know that it's not about how long you can hold a title. It's about the impact you make, the stories you tell in the ring. And what's your story, Cassidy? That you can put your hands in your pockets and still win matches?"

He chuckles, shaking his head.

Christian Cage: "I'll admit, it's entertaining. A great trick for the crowd. But this is professional wrestling, not a comedy show. When I step in the ring, I do more than just entertain, I leave a mark. I create moments that will be remembered long after I retire. Can you say the same, Cassidy? Or will you just be remembered as the guy with the lazy kicks and the constant smirk?"

Christian stands tall, Luchasaurus roaring behind him, as he looks directly into the camera.

Christian Cage: "You can keep your aviators, your half-hearted thumbs up, and your sloth-style wrestling, Cassidy. Because I'm coming for that title. And when I take it from you, everyone, including you, will know what real respect feels like."

The titantron fades to black, the image of Christian's intense gaze and Luchasaurus' roar echoing in the minds of the audience. The challenge is set. The hunt for the AEW International Championship has begun.

---

Later in the night, Renee Paquette finds herself in the locker room of the Blackpool Combat Club: Bryan Danielson, Jon Moxley, Claudio Castagnoli, and Wheeler Yuta.

"Blackpool Combat Club," Renee begins, standing amidst the group, microphone extended. "The Dark Order has issued a challenge to you all for next week. A no disqualification, no holds barred match. Do you accept?"

Before any of them can answer, Bryan Danielson steps forward. "Before we get to that," he starts, running a hand through his hair. "I want to address something. Yes, I suffered a deeply personal loss against Kazuchika Okada at Forbidden Door. And now, everyone thinks he's dethroned me as the best wrestler in the world."

He shakes his head, a determined look on his face. "I want everyone to know that this has made me more focused, more dangerous than ever. Okada, I don't care what country or what continent we meet in again. Mark my words, you haven't seen the last of me, and next time, I'll make you tap out."

Before Danielson can continue, Jon Moxley interjects, a wicked smile playing on his lips. "Now, about that challenge," he begins, his eyes gleaming with excitement. "The Dark Order wants to dance with us in a no disqualification, no holds barred match? That's right up our alley."

His smile broadens, the thrill of the upcoming fight evident in his eyes. "They want violence? We'll give them violence. They want chaos? We're the kings of chaos."

Moxley leans into the camera, his voice dropping to a growl. "Dark Order, be careful what you wish for. You're stepping into our world now. And trust me, it's a world of pain. See you next week."

With that, the segment concludes, the Blackpool Combat Club standing united, their expressions promising an intense match for next week's show.

---

<b>AEW Tag Team Championship: Sammy Hager (Sammy Guevara and Jake Hager) vs. FTR (Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler) (C)</b>

FTR remain fighting champions, willing to take on all comers and answering the call of Sammy Hager who called them out during the JAS' promo last week. The announcers again speculate on the status and whereabouts of Chris Jericho, remarking that there have rarely been any Dynamites in company history without him.

Anyway, it's an FTR match so you know it's going to kick all sorts of ass. In addition to their stats being great, their tag experience is high so it feels damn near impossible for them to not pull a 4-star match out of anyone, even a team that's somewhat thrown together.

Finish sequence sees Hager make a blind tag as Sammy goes up for a 630 and misses, leaving Hager all alone for the Big Rig for the win. After the bell, the familiar intro sound effect for Bullet Club plays over the arena. FTR drop their titles and begin scanning all corners of the crowd, anticipating a run-in that never comes. Some head games from Bullet Club Gold as the champs retain. <b>****1/4, 86% overall</b>

---

[CAMERA ON: The scene unfolds backstage on Dynamite. RENEE PAQUETTE stands with DON CALLIS and KONOSUKE TAKESHITA. Callis' face is a mask of smug satisfaction, Takeshita's, as ever, is cool and focused.]

PAQUETTE: [Microphone in hand, addresses Callis] "Don, Kenny Omega lost his IWGP United States Championship to Will Ospreay at Forbidden Door, but some would say it was your 'son' Takeshita's interference that made that happen. How do you respond?"

CALLIS: [Laughs, dismisses the question with a wave of his hand] "Let's not get lost in the details, Renee. The important thing here is Kenny Omega is no longer the IWGP United States Champion. Will Ospreay is. The wrestling world is shifting, and I dare say it's moving in our favor."

[Paquette seems to want to follow up, but Callis continues.]

CALLIS: "And speaking of change, Kota Ibushi having the nerve to show up in AEW. Coming to Kenny's aid at Forbidden Door. Getting involved in something that doesn't concern him. How... [His lips curl in distaste] touching."

[Callis leans in closer to the camera, his gaze intense.]

CALLIS: "But listen here, Ibushi. I don't care about your past with Kenny, or whatever bond you think you two share. In fact, your arrival here is, in my eyes, nothing more than a temporary blip. Because my 'son', Konosuke Takeshita..."

[He turns, placing a hand on Takeshita's shoulder, who meets the camera with a cold, challenging stare.]

CALLIS: "...is ready and waiting. You might be a Golden Star, but remember, even stars burn out. And when Takeshita is done with you, your time in AEW will indeed be very short-lived."

[CAMERA OFF: The scene ends on that chilling note, Callis grinning menacingly into the camera, his confident gaze not faltering as the frame goes black.]

---

<b>Konosuke Takeshita w/ Don Callis vs. "Golden Star" Kota Ibushi</b>

Konosuke Takeshita vs. Kota Ibushi...in the spirit of Forbidden Door, the kind of match that seemed unfathomable just a few days ago is now taking place in the main event of AEW Dynamite! Excalibur explains that, despite both men spending nearly their entire careers in Japan, they've nearly always been in different companies and their paths haven't crossed. They haven't shared a ring since 2015, and their lone singles matchup was just over a decade ago on January 27th, 2013.

Anyway, Takeshita's been running through some luchadores to get him established as a heel. But Ibushi is a whole other level. Really the purpose of this match is to familiarize the audience with Ibushi (not particularly difficult as smark heavy crowds would know him) and make sure he has a banger of a first AEW match.

And boy does he ever. These guys' stats match up nearly identically and it shows, as they pull off the elusive 100% match quality stat. Tons of hard hitting, a flurry of nearfalls and acrobatics all in one epic PPV quality main event. Ibushi connects with the Kamigoye for the win.

Don Callis pounds the mat in anger, and Takeshita pounces right back on Ibushi, acting like a sore loser. Here comes Kenny Omega for the save. Omega and Ibushi embrace again, as the crowd goes off the air with the pop at the reunion of the Golden Lovers. <b>****1/2, 86% overall rating

82% overall show rating</b>

This post is sponsored by F.A.N.G.'s poison
 

Aww, yeah, tournaments! You're going to need some neat looking brackets so that I can keep track of things. This is a solid opener. Actually more than solid if it reached 4 stars.

Hey, if you like women's tournaments as much as I do, you're going to love what's coming up for me in a few months after the Rumble...

I missed stuff like this. World Class would do this kind of thing all the time with Jimmy Garvin and Gino Hernandez and the like. It gave a much deeper look into the lives of these people you're watching every week. There's social media now, but it doesn't really register the same. I try to read these promos in the same manner as that video you linked me and I can absolutely see it. Letting guys talk for themselves...what a wacky idea, am I right?

Hey, you can't give the referees names! Don't you know they're just supposed to be anonymous, amorphous entities that for some reason are just there in the general vicinity of the action? That's what the WWE taught me, at least. I actually need to look at my staff because for the life of me I'm not sure who is still a ref in my promotion. I don't know if you've ever sent me a picture of it, but is the FTW Title belt still the same from ECW back in the day or did someone decide to give it an "update"?

This reminds me of when Lex Luger got jumped by "Sting" and the NWO and everyone wasn't sure about Sting's loyalties and for whatever reason Sting waited like 6 fucking days to even try to talk with Lex and the Horseman. Like, you all don't have phones? Wrestling asks us to accept this really weird world where people need an audience present to talk to one another. AND WE GO ALONG WITH IT!!! :lol: I'm guessing this is leading to Page doing some kind of turn.

Oh, man, Jake Roberts vs. Arn Anderson? Did that ever happen? The promos alone would've been amazing. Shame you have Mark Henry, I assume, as a mere member of the staff, because he'd make a great payoff to this thing you've got Wardlow doing, going through hosses and all.

This is exactly the kind of thing Christian would say about someone like Cassidy. I'm trying to imagine what the actual roars would sound like. Like, is he actually trying to do dinosaur roars or is it just a normal yell? Why does this promotion bring up so many questions?

I'm surprised that I haven't asked this question yet, but does AEW acknowledge the marriage between Renee and Moxley? They acknowledge so many other relationships from what you've told me, so I don't see why they wouldn't go for it here with these two. How soon do you think you'd be able to do Danielson/Okada again if you were so inclined?

I don't think I ever knew Harwood and Wheeler before I stopped following. I know a couple of guys on your roster just by name, like Omega, and a few that I knew in previous incarnations like Hager, but FTR are a complete unknown, I think. Everyone seems to praise them so I'll accept that such an outcome as this is absolutely possible.

I would've thought you'd save an encounter like this up for another show, possibly a PPV, but how can you argue with a rating like that? The next step I assume you're going to make is building towards Ospreay/Takeshita vs. the, uh, Golden Lovers?

This post is sponsored by Radio Shack
 

Raw: December 10, 2040

Twenty Minute Opening Promo of Doom Time as Orlando Kincaid of all people decides to start things off. He's not going to lie to us, he's had a rough couple of weeks. It was a rough pill to swallow losing at Survivor Series, but then it was an even rougher one last week when Ryan Pattillo came out on top. Now he has to watch Pattillo go on to possibly win the Unified World Title at Bragging Rights. "Well, Ryan, last week you said you owe me for your new found focus. I'd hate for you to carry such a debt with you so on the off chance that you're able crank out a miracle and take home the title twenty days from tonight, I've got a great idea about how you can repay me and that's giving me a crack at it."

"Orlando, Orlando, Orlando...", speaks a voice, interrupting things. Everyone looks to the stage and out from the back, one at a time, emerges Chet Morris, Quinten McDaniels...and Hugo! What's the deal with these three? They all step into the ring and stand facing Orlando as Quinten continues on the mic.

"At ease, Orlando. You've got nothing to worry about when it comes to the three of us. You know Chet and myself, obviously, and you know that if we're coming to you, we have nothing but the best of intentions. The three of us have come together for very different, yet very similar reasons. There's been a weight tied to each of us and it's what's been holding us back from our real potential. Chet had his worthless cousin dragging him down. Hugo was too confined by rules and regulations. And myself? Unfinished business. Orlando, I think it's safe to say that I know you better than anyone and I definitely sympathize with what you're saying out here. But take it from us, you can't move forward unless you're willing to be honest with yourself. You see there is a great man that we think you should meet, Orlando, and his name is Victor Dark."

Chet takes the mic and continues from where Quinten started. "Orlando, we go way back, so we can be honest with each other. Victor Dark helped us all realize what was wrong in our lives, and in turn, we can now see what's wrong in yours. We would all love to have you at our side as we help you get rid of the baggage that's holding you back."

Orlando takes this opportunity to interrupt. "Are you talking about Haven? Uh, hate to break it you guys, but I've been over him and that whole mess for a long time now, so I don't know where all of this is coming from."

Quinten takes back the mic and sighs before responding. "Orlando, you can't kid yourself and you can't kid us. Victor Dark has shined the light on something so obvious. We're prisoners of our past until the moment we confront it and destroy it. This is why Noah Carmichael and Seth Von Kamp managed to get the better of me. It's because I've been letting myself get the better of me. Victor is reaching out to you as a former victim of Haven's nonsense, but more importantly, I'm reaching out to you as a friend. We'll happily be at your side as you take the first real step towards actual rehabilitation."

Orlando takes his time as he looks at each of the other men and then gives his reply. "Quinten, no offense, but what the hell have you been smoking? Chet, don't take this wrong way, but I've always thought you smelled kind of funky. You, Hugo, I don't know what your deal is and we've never had any kind of relationship, but just the fact that you're standing here swallowing all of this crap tells me you're as dumb as you are big. And Quinten, did it ever occur to you that the reason you couldn't beat Noah and Seth is because you just suck?"

The crowd cheers all of this as each man is aghast at what Orlando is saying. He's not done, though. "Last I checked, Quinten, when we all split, you wanted nothing to do with me. Well, I learned to deal with that so you're a little late to the party. And as far as your great man Victor Dark goes, all I need to know about the guy is that he apparently doesn't have the balls to even come out here himself and face me. So thanks, but no thanks. I've got better things to do. You guys have fun with whatever the hell this is."

With that, Orlando tosses the mic down and makes his exit. Upon reaching the stage, he meets Victor Dark himself who merely looks at him briefly before closing his eyes and shaking his head. He steps aside and gestures to Kincaid to continue his exit. This isn't stopping Quinten McDaniels, though, and he gets back on the mic. "That's fine and dandy, Orlando. I guess we're just going to have to make a better pitch. We dare any team back there to come on out and face any two of us right here and now and maybe then you'll see what you're turning down!" With that we go to break as the three men await an answer.

First Match: Hugo and Chet Morris vs. The Wasteland
Well, we've our answer as we return from break as Duke and Drakken have stepped up to the plate. Quinten plays cheerleader on the outside as Hugo and Chet pretty much dominate this motherfucker. It comes to an end when the faces manage to get their shit together and have Chet set up for the Toxic Kiss but Quinten drags Drakken out of the ring behind the ref's back. Duke turns around to see this and that allows Chet to low blow him and deliver his Backwoods Bomb variation to score the pin. WAIT A MINUTE!!! HERE COMES EDDY CLASH!!! He's full of piss and vinegar and tries his hand at getting to Hugo. The three heels decide to regroup instead and make their escape. Like I said, more twists and turns. *****, 87% overall.

Second Match: Neil Quint vs. Ozzy Mandias
Ozzy gets on the mic as he wants to explain his actions. He declares that both Martyn LaSalle and Jordan Demiras got what was coming to them, something that was overdue. If it weren't for their incompetence and arrogance, Ozzy Mandias would be standing before all of us as the Cruiserweight Champion. Martyn LaSalle talked himself into a corner and ended up not being able to cash that check. "It's not my problem that he couldn't handle being called out on his BS! And then to add to the misery, all of you people though that freaking Jordan Demiras deserved a Slammy? For what?!? If he thinks he's earned that Slammy so badly, I'll knock him upside the head with it and then shove it up his ass because I'm through with being in the backseat!" So with that said, we've got a match to take care of and it's pretty lit. I've got plans for both guys and there's no need to end Quint's streak just yet. Neil has Ozzy set up for the Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver but Ozzy rolls out of the ring before Neil can launch. Ozzy tries taking a breather BUT HERE COMES JORDAN DEMIRAS!!! He's looking none too happy and Ozzy realizes this and thus gets the bright idea of running away with Demiras in pursuit. That's going to give Neil the count out win as he continues his winning ways but no doubt this isn't over between Demiras and Ozzy. ****1/4, 81% overall.

Hey, suck my balls, DUD show! :)

Third Match: Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper vs. The Sin City Rollers
So this is the first team up between Jake Connelly's clients. Connelly declares that he sees great potential in both of these young talents, but he wants to be see how well they fire on all cylinders together. That's why he issued an open challenge earlier to see if there is any team that can put his new project to the test. Connelly believes that Lang and Harper can go far...now they have to prove it. Vic Gambler and Luis Ortega have answered the call and are ready to put these two newbies over. With Lang being a top merchandise seller, I may have a hidden gem here on my hands. I didn't foresee that big of a future for him but the game might be giving me a sign. Connelly gets his two clients through this ordeal with his verbal orders as the Rollers obviously have a huge experience advantage here. Lang does the job of clean up after Harper gets the hot tag. Lang hits Gambler with the Bitter Languish and stumbles into the corner for a brief respite. Harper tags himself in and jumps on Gambler's body to score the pin. Connelly slides in to celebrate and congratulate the two as it appears he's got himself another pair of winners. ****1/2, 81% overall.

Seriously, suck my balls. :)

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time this time with the WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp. "I knew from the moment I won this strap there was going to be nothing a barrage of would-be potential champions coming right at me, all looking to want to make a mark and all at the expense of my name. I scratched and clawed for nearly a decade to finally get my hands on this beauty so my only real message to the poor SOBs who are thinking of trying their hand is good freaking luck and sorry about what I'm going to do to your face. This belt will definitely get you noticed so it should be no surprise that I've got Chris Collins knocking at my door. Chris, we go back, and I always wondered where we'd each end up after we went our separate ways. Fast forward to right now, and I have to say that I'm not exactly interested in being part of your crisis. But like I said before, the struggle for this belt was real and I'm prepared to do it again, especially against someone like you. So I'll be there at Bragging Rights just like you asked. Think of it as a little something for old times sake. But as far as what you're going to do with yourself after I beat you, well, I can't help you there."

The arena gets blasted with the sounds of the entrance music of Chris Collins and the second-generation star makes his way on out to the stage. How's he going to respond to this? "Seth, if I hadn't been dealing with so many small fry issues this past year, understand that I would have surpassed where you are without so much as breaking a sweat. Now it's time for me to start catching the big fish again. Today, the Intercontinental Title; tomorrow...well, the sky is limit as far as I'm concerned. You can parade that lovely piece of hardware around all you like, but you're still the same Seth Von Kamp I used to know. I, on the other hand, am a new man. Sorry to have to cut your new lease on life short, but destiny is calling and you're in the damn way. Keep your apologies, Seth. I'm going to be just fine after Bragging Rights." And with that, Chris drops the mic and confidently struts his way to the back leaving Seth with a ponderous look on his face.

Backstage, Brooke is with Salvatore Scabbia and Ronnie Costello, and none of them are having what the Academy said on SmackDown!. Brooke has all of her ducks in a row. The Academy just didn't have what it took to measure up to the standards she has and so they decided it'd be easier to tuck tail and run. Well, it's not easier. Scabbia and Ronnie are prepared to make things VERY difficult for them. They've actually been toying with the idea of challenging the Academy to a match at Bragging Rights. Brooke thinks it's a great idea...or is that too tough for Justin and Randy?

Fourth Match: Gavin Jones and Clubber Harris vs. The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody and Zed Jones
Gavin Jones gets on the mic and addresses his current deal with Michael Hotbody. "I may have lost my crew and I may have lost my partnership, but I haven't lost my ability to get under people's skin. And if there's one person who's been asking for it for a very long time, it's none other than a guy who managed to win an award called Douche of the Year. Don't get me wrong, it was a beautiful ceremony on SmackDown!, but you'll forgive me for reading the room and reaching the conclusion that, just like me, everyone is sick and tired of Michael Hotbody and company. But there's a bigger issue at hand than Hotbody being a stain on this business. Hotbody, you've got the Cruiserweight Championship, and every day that passes where you're able to call yourself that is an embarrassment and a slap in my face. I've damn near broken my body for that belt in the past and I'm ready to do it all over again because a coward like you doesn't deserve it. But that's Bragging Rights; tonight is another deal entirely. And as I mentioned before, I am without my crew but I am not without backup. You've got a whole other problem with the man standing right next to me. I think he's got something to get off his chest, too. What say you, Clubber?"

Clubber Harris takes the mic and focuses his words on Zed Jones. "It's nice and all that Michael Hotbody has got himself a bodyguard in you, Zed. Unfortunately, there ain't nobody guarding your sorry ass. There ain't nobody that CAN guard your sorry ass. So when you step up to me, son, with your tough act and steel gaze, and then get smacked down into paste by an even tougher and badder sumbitch like Clubber Harris, I want you to look at each and every cut, every scrape, every bruise, and every bloodstain, and I want you to remember that your boy, Hotbody, was the one that put you up to it! I've been in fights that'll make your skin crawl, Zed. I have seen some stuff. So by all means, when you're ready to get some quality one-on-one time, I will give you an education you won't believe. COUNT ON IT!"

The heels make their way out and Luscious isn't about to let all that talk go unanswered. "All that talk and nothing to show for it! Look at all of this shine that we've got going on over here! Neither Michael nor Zed have anything to fear from two people like you! Gavin, you don't have a belt. Harris, you don't have a prayer." Everyone seems to have gotten what they need to say out of their system so now it's go time. Hotbody, of course, doesn't actually want to do anything here and is more than happy to let Zed muscle everyone else around. The Slammys need polishing you know! Gavin manages a hot tag to Harris and thus begins the part where Harris is on fire. Zed gets knocked around and Harris proceeds to bring in Hotbody against his will. Zed prevents any harm and slugs it out with Harris. Luscious slides a Slammy award to Hotbody and he tries to nail Clubber with it from behind. Clubber turns and catches Hotbody's arm and yanks the award away. Hotbody bails but Zed spins Harris around and he instinctively retaliates by striking Zed with the award causing the DQ. Gavin chases Hotbody around the ring and manages to grab him and send him back inside with Harris. Harris looks to drill Hotbody with the same award but Zed shoves Harris down from behind, scoops up Hotbody and gets his crew out of there. Heated doesn't even begin to describe this situation. ****1/2, 83% overall.

More backstage goodness as Madison and the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Wyldhearts want to rip into The Royal Effect. They hope that winning the Tag Team of the Year Slammy Award doesn't go to the heads of Moses McKay and King Kavovit. After all, the two of them were riding high as the Tag Team Champions not that long ago and living in a little bubble thinking they were untouchable and then that blew up in their faces. The Wyldhearts delivered a nice stiff jab when they captured these titles. So now all that's left is to knock out the Royal Effect for good. Believe Blaine and Robbie when they say they're ready whenever the Royal Effect are. 2041 is going to be year where everyone will have to pay attention to the Wyldhearts.

Fifth Match: Adam Hail and The Southern Belles vs. Simon Bennett and The Perfections
Nathan Quinn wants to laugh at the pathetic assemblage of clients under the banner of Paul Andrews. Andrews can get whoever he wants, they'll all be doing nothing but chasing rainbows and fantasies because they'll be chasing the best. Adam Hail is better than he's ever been. Hannah McCormick and Bobbi Jo are the Women's Tag Team Champions and the finest well-oiled machine in any of the tag divisions. "Paul, you need to understand that the main reason we're all in these positions is because you and your crew failed to see what was coming. You never suspected a damn thing because you lack vision. That's going to be your downfall. Bragging Rights is shaping up to be one of the worst nights of your career. First, my girls are going to keep these titles. Then, Adam Hail is going to put the finishing touches on what he started when he embarrasses Simon Bennett again. But don't take my word for it. By all means, come on down and get a piece!"

I've been wanting to do this trios match for a while, but Survivor Series kind of forced my hand to do other stuff. I'd have saved it for the PPV but I feel Bennett/Hail deserves a PPV slot on its own. The only issue is getting a buyrate large enough to cover their cost. Anyway, the match is the bomb as they work hard to offset the DUD factor. We head home as it's down to Bobbi and Bonnie as the legal competitors. The ref is distracted with Hail and Bennett going at it on the outside. Bobbi has Bonnie waistlocked and it looks like she's trying a suplex or takedown or whatever. Bonnie makes the ropes, trying to break free but Hannah uses this opportunity to clobber Bonnie with a title belt over the head. Bobbi uses the momentum to get a roll up and she uses the tights for good measure. Andrews and Quinn have managed to separate their clients the ref is free to count the cheap pin for the heels. Nathan Quinn might have had a point. ****1/2, 81% overall.

Sixth Match: Xavier Cross vs. Alexander Piero
This is essentially the main event but the final segment is going to be more talky stuff. Piero needs to be rebuilt, too, but Cross is the one with a major feud going on that still needs resolution. Cross declares that he's still looking to get retribution for being triple teamed at Survivor Series. He can't do anything about Ryan Pattillo now as he's got business at Bragging Rights. But Alexander Piero and Kyle Jacobs are ripe for the ass kicking. Cross hopes Jacobs is watching because he'll be bringing the same to his doorstep. Once that's all done, he hopes and prays that Ryan Pattillo is champion after Bragging Rights, because his beating will be the hat trick and just the start of the new year Cross is hoping for! We get a good outing here. Piero has managed to rack up some decent mileage this year despite still being relatively new and certainly way less seasoned than a guy like Cross. Cross makes good on his word, being hella vicious on Piero and working over the arm. It comes to an end when Piero fights back enough to where he can try a Flashpoint but his arm isn't up to snuff and he doubles over in pain, clutching the source. Cross grabs the arm and jumps over the rop, snapping the arm across it to make things worse. Cross slides in to go for the kill and he hits the Cross Cutter on a vulnerable Piero to get the pin. Afterwards, Cross looks like he's going to really deliver some punishment but HERE COME KYLE JACOBS!!! Cross feels discretion is the better form of valor and decides to bail. ****1/2, 83% overall.

SPORTZ ENTERTAINMENT!!!!~~~ Time to close us out and we've got the number one contender for the WWE Unified World Title, Ryan Pattillo, joining us. "Against all odds and hope beyond hope, I knew that eventually I would be here again someday. I knew that I would be in prime position to once again take that top spot on the mountain and wear that gold one more time. It wasn't easy, watching the title scene get overrun with all of the drama and chaos and uncertainty. It's been a long time and while I may have forgotten a few things as time has passed, I haven't forgotten how to be a champion. I haven't forgotten how to win. At Bragging Rights I have the chance to close the book on a really bad time in my career and begin writing a new epic. In one night, in one big move, I can undo the bad and bring about something that you people deserve!"

"These people don't deserve a damn thing, Ryan." Well we knew this wasn't going to go on too long without an interruption. It's the Money in the Bank winner himself, Brandon Reigns! He talks as he makes way down to the ring to join Pattillo. "Oh, sure, I can give them a bit of credit for actually having the brains to name me as the Superstar of the Year, but a room full of monkeys could've made that same call. Although, maybe I can sort of see where you're coming from. A group of mediocrity definitely does deserve someone like you. You didn't just have a "bad time", Ryan. You had a disaster. And now you think you can somehow turn a negative into a positive? Well, points for enthusiasm, but you need to understand that should you succeed, it'll be fleeting. I'm here to remind you of what's in store for any champion that makes it out of the WrestleMania main event. The trail of bodies I've been leaving is leading to that night."

The music of Kerry Cemenko hits and the man himself makes his way out to give his thoughts, standing in the aisle. "Brandon, it's nice that you can make such bold plans, but the problem is that a lot can happen in the next few months. There could be a stock market crash. A new species of ocean life can be discovered! Crocs could make a comeback! But most importantly, I could probably mess you up so badly that WrestleMania won't even be possible for you. I know you feel like you have to come out here all the time and bluster and make a big showing for the sake of your ego, but I have to wonder as the days to WrestleMania begin to dry up, do you secretly look at yourself in the mirror and worry? Could all of your best laid plans be snuffed out in an instant? Would you be better off choosing to cash in that contract sooner? I don't envy your position, Reigns, but I know what I would've already done. I'd already be standing here the Unified Champion and I'd be the one looking towards WrestleMania."

Pattillo takes this opportunity to reply. "No, you'd be the one I'd be taking down at Bragging Rights."

Reigns interjects with his own take. "Sorry, but this is all moot anyway. You don't have this contract, Kerry. I do. Neither one of you was selected as Superstar of the Year. I WAS! There is nothing the two of you bring to the table that can shake my resolve!"

The music of the WWE Unified World Champion hits and Wrakk makes his way out onto the stage. "Maybe they can't rattle you, Brandon, but I sure as hell can. You got a trail of bodies? I've got a pile. You got a Slammy? I've got the Unified World Championship. You got the briefcase? I can shove it right up your ass. I am going to plow through everybody that gets thrown at me. Haven was the first. Ryan, you're going to be next. And when it all comes to pass, Brandon, once I've finished annihilating whoever is in that main event across from me at WrestleMania 57, if you're actually going to be there at ringside like you claim, I'm going to kneel over the broken body of my opponent, I'm going to hold up their head, face them towards you so you can see what's left of them, and I'm going to watch the piss drip from you as you slowly realize what a huge mistake you made in waiting so long. Now I don't have many vulnerable moments, but should you ever be so lucky to stumble across such an opportunity, you'd be stupid to not go for it. Of course, that actually might be worse."

Patillo responds by calling Wrakk stupid if he thinks he's heading into a cake walk at Bragging Rights. Wrakk counters that the two of them have already danced to this number before and it didn't turn out so great for Ryan in the end. Ryan dares Wrakk to test him right now if he's so confident. It'd be a great way to show a jackass like Reigns what he's getting himself into. Reigns takes offense to this comment and tries to cheap shot Pattillo in response. Pattillo blocks the shot and he and Reigns slug it out. Kerry slides in to lend a hand but Wrakk isn't too far behind. It's a wild four-man brawl. It comes to a close as Wrakk tries whacking Pattillo with one of his title belts but he swings too wildly and Pattillo avoids getting hit and manages to land the Shutdown on the champion. Reigns nails Pattillo from behind with his briefcase, sending Pattillo to the outside, leaving him standing over the fallen body of Wrakk. He looks down at the champion and it slowly dawns on him what an opportunity this is. He looks at the Money in the Bank briefcase, then back at Wrakk. He looks around the arena with an expression of uncertainty. Is he thinking about cashing in right now?!? This could really disrupt things if he decides to do it. He clutches the briefcase, still looking unsure, but Kerry Cemenko is going to make the decision for him by getting back into the fight and clotheslining Reigns over the top. Reigns decides he's done for the night and takes off in disgust as we go off the air. Would Reigns have done it??? The march towards Bragging Rights continues!

Overall show rating: 82%

I didn't say to stop sucking my balls!!!

Loved the opening promo with the heels all finally acknowledging why they've come together. Selfishly I hope the group winds up being called the Dark Order :lol:

I also kinda have to crack up at the open challenge being answered by two guys that I automatically picture as The Ascension from WWE. Total jobbers, inasmuch as a jobber can exist in this world where everyone just rules ass in the ring.

I've said this before but I love the role of managers in this game. I don't know why but at some point WWE got to the mindset of managers only being allowed to have one and only one client at a time and that's just totally different from how managers operated in the '80s. It would make sense for managers to try to recruit a robust list of candidates, bringing them together when necessary but ultimately just trying to make bank.

AEW does something similar, solid amount of managers. Smart Mark Sterling manages the jobber Trustbusters stable but his highest profile client is Jade Cargill....and he's responsible for costing Jade the title and undefeated streak because he decided to issue an open challenge on her behalf.

Nice work with the promo before the Hotbody match, he continues to grate on everyone's skin which is great, but I also love Clubber going after the bodyguard too. Zed Jones vs. Clubber Harris feels like it should be a boxing match from 1985.

Also good on you for not shying away from ending the show with a talking segment. I'm so used to the way AEW books that I very rarely don't end with a match, but ending with a promo makes for a nice change of pace.

I've set both tournaments up to be reasonably quick sprints. The next Dynamite and next two Collisions will have the first round matches and then it's right onto the semi's and we're then set for the finals on the "PPV".

As best I can tell it's the original ECW belt. Taz reintroduced it in 2020, awarding it to his client Brian Cage. Over time the Team Taz stable got built. By summer of 2021 they were having some in-fighting between Brian Cage and Ricky Starks and Taz was like "I'm sick of this shit, you guys fight it out for the FTW title". Taz proceeded to screw Cage out of the match, booting him from the stable.

Starks mostly just carried the belt for a year, only sporadically defending it, until Taz's son Hook won the belt last summer and he's held it ever since. It's not a sanctioned title so it really is just a prop. But I like the idea of the belt falling out of the realm of Taz's family.

It really is kinda daft, isn't it? :lol: I feel like with wrestling I do have to suspend my disbelief for things like this. Also when a miscommunication happens and apparently nobody bothers to sit down and watch a replay until the next week. Also people bouncing off the ropes in general. Man this sport is so dumb, I love it.

I have no knowledge of that match actually happening but if I have legends available as managers, dammit I'm gonna use 'em.

As for Henry, he's said in interviews he'd be open to a proper retirement match but since he's not worked a match since 2018, whoever made this data set up up as a staff member only. Whereas I have some other staff members that ARE available to be booked because they at least sporadically wrestle.

I've got some fun ideas for Wardlow that are in the realm of "probably wouldn't be a good match, wouldn't want to see it in real life, but it would still kinda pop me because of how surreal it is"

I've never once heard Luchasaurus roar :lol: it's not the first time ChatGPT has made him roar in a generated promo either. It must read his name and decide, DAMMIT, SOMEONE WHO LOOKS LIKE THAT MUST ROAR! I read that in Vince's voice.

Yeah, real-world relationships are definitely canon in AEW. Although I don't believe Renee ever actually interviews Mox, maybe for conflict of interest reasons + him being a heel and all of that. It's been acknowledged in passing that they're together but since it's not a part of the story it kinda is glossed over.

In game, NJPW are touring for all of July-much of August. There's a brief window in late August where I could hypothetically book them for the All In Wembley show to fit the "supershow" theme.

Dunno if I'd do Okada/Danielson again in-game though - I had him hint it in his promo but with this being a working relationship with NJPW, my headcanon is that he might go over and work the match during the January 4th Tokyo Dome show.

This timeline checks out since you stopped watching around WM32. I believe 2016 was the year The Revival (as they were known in NXT then) exploded and went on a run of tag team greatness. They ended up being called up to the main roster a year later.

Though they did hold main roster gold, they were always gonna be kinda fucked there. The Revival's best work came from really long-form matches packed with psychology. Main roster WWE at the time was just quick 5 minute TV matches, which was the opposite of their strength.

I probably should've saved Ibushi/Takeshita for a bigger show, but the conundrum I have is that my next "PPV" in July I've softly targeted as being the big blowoff to the Elite/BCC angle that, in real life, has been going on since late March. Not sure I want to stretch it all the way to late August at this point. In game it would be great, in reality it's time to wrap the feud up.

As for the Golden Lovers...if you ever care to read a very long/geeky blog post, this is a very in-depth glimpse onto the origins of their story. TLDR it's like a 15+ year gay story arc and they've done such a brilliant job of blending the angle with kayfabe that nobody even total knows the extent to their personal relationship outside of the ring.

Just kinda love the idea that angles like this can slowly go from being hush-hush/being played for laughs in the early to mid 2000s to being something you can actually bring over to mainstream.

https://medium.com/we-need-to-talk-a...d-e9fc604e3a7f

Well, it's the last day of the month so may as well power through a quick Rampage to get to my first batch of month-end goodness.

https://www.wrestlezone.com/wp-conte...ge-logo-1-.jpg

AEW Rampage
June 30, 2023

The Dark Order (Evil Uno and Stu Grayson) w/ Alex Reynolds and John Silver vs. The Wingmen ("Pretty" Peter Avalon and Ryan Nemeth) w/ Cezar Bononi

Third Rampage in a row I'm opening up with The Dark Order as they continue to mow their way through jobbers to look more serious ahead of their match with Blackpool Combat Club on Dynamite.

More or less a one-sided affair with the heels impressively selling their asses off for Dark Order here. Bononi tries to get involved by Reynolds and Silver thwart his attempts, as Uno and Grayson finish Avalon off with The Fatality for the win.

After the bell, Nemeth is slid into the ring to get a Fatality of his own. And then the big man Bononi is impressively given one as well. We haven't seen the Dark Order look this imposing since 2020. Maybe they'll give the BCC more of a run for their money than Hangman thinks (narrator: or not). The group all do their signature claw gesture as we go to commercial. <b>***, 69% overall rating</b>

---

<b>Roderick Strong vs. Tony Deppen</b>

Booking Rampage really is a breeze sometimes. Scan my roster, find someone "important" I want to book and give some reps, scan through my list of "already in the ring" jobbers and enhancement talent to see if someone could be of use.

Picked Tony Deppen for the task as I felt like their stats would mesh well. Apparently was wrong here which surprised me, both guys have really nice brawl and technical. They still pulled a Perfectly Acceptable rating but nothing to write home about.

Alas, Deppen is also a vacuum of overness so that probably didn't help. Either way, he's here to make Strong look good and put over his shit. Strong wins with the Death by Roderick and that's that. <b>**3/4, 68% overall</b>

---

CM Punk and Samoa Joe hype video building to their clash on Collision tomorrow. Naturally this pulls a rating somewhere in the 90s as I continue to use videos to artificially bump up the fact that the wrestling itself is often just for enhancement purposes so the network doesn't cancel me.

---

<b>TBS Championship: Kris Statlander (C) vs. Penelope Ford w/ The Bunny</b>

Last week, Stat defended against the Bunny in a good match, but got jumped by Ford afterwards. Today it's Ford's chance to get her some as the champion takes on all comers.

I.....did not realize how bad Ford's stats were in this data. Because yikes, this was the worst rated match I've had in this save. I mean with that said it could've been way worse, but yeah the bar is quite high in this universe. I didn't realize but if you have a bad match and read the match results, Scott Keith will say stuff like "Ford hits a crap dropkick" and whatever, basically telling you the match sucks. Case in point, the TBS Title lost image in this match. It's hard to have an image-losing title match in this game.

Anyway, Stat avoids Bunny interference and wins with the Big Bang Theory. After the bell, Ford and Bunny double team her (there aren't enough zeroes for what I'd pay for THAT double team :shifty: ) and Thunder Rosa runs out for the save. Rosa has come in to save the woman she's been targeting for a title opportunity. In theory this is building to a tag match that I might go through with despite Ford's showing here, just for the sake of the story. We'll see. <b>**, 65% overall</b>

---

Bryan Danielson is standing by with Claudio Castagnoli, building to tonight's main event.

DANIELSON: "Forbidden Door might be in our rear view mirror, but the Blackpool Combat Club have come out of it learning some valuable lessons. Jon Moxley reminded everyone why he's one of the toughest sons of bitches on the planet, and I went toe-to-toe with the so called best in the world.

But my loss on Sunday will not be in vain, the Blackpool Combat Club enjoy being pushed. We push each other to the limits every single day in training. We push ourselves to be the best.

So tonight, Claudio steps into the ring with a man many others consider to be one of the best.

Chris Daniels, you've done a lot for us in our careers. You're a legend in this business. You're much more skilled than those clowns in the Dark Order that want to fight us next week. You're damn sure more reputable than those amateurs in The Elite. We don't want to hurt you. But tonight you're in the wrong place, wrong time."

---

<b>"The Fallen Angel" Christopher Daniels vs. Claudio Castagnoli</b>

Come on, just look at those names. Is there any doubt that this is gonna rule all kinds of ass?

Sure enough, it does! Danielson joins commentary and tries to refrain from letting his inner wrestling fan geekdom come out as Claudio and Daniels just put on a clinic in the ring. Given the squash-ish nature of the other three matches I'm seriously imagining this one being given the last 20 minutes or so of an hour-long broadcast, just let 'em cook.

Anyway, after captivating the audience with Daniels pulling off a number of surprise nearfalls, a brutal uppercut stalls his moment. Ricola Bomb and that's all she wrote, Claudio gets the win. Danielson hops in to raise his hand in celebration as we go off the air. <b>****1/4, 86% overall rating

80% overall show rating</b>

End of Month Notes as we head into July:

-Not an e-mail note but I'm retconning my referring to the July "PPV" as Fight for the Fallen. I've re-named it to Blood and Guts. If you recall from my previous game, Blood and Guts is basically War Games. Well, I'm doing one of those matches at the show. And calling it "Fight for the Fallen", a show meant to raise money for gun violence and having a match called Blood and Guts on it would be, well, a choice :lol:

-NOAH announced their touring roster which includes Timothy Thatcher, who was on my roster on an Open deal but I couldn't use him because he was away for most of the month on a NOAH tour. Anyway, Thatcher announced he was dropping me and any other global-level bookings because of pressure from his Japan commitments.

What this means is that, all of the New Japan guys are going to leave me in March 2024 when NJPW announce their roster for the next year. I will need to use Arsenic if I want to get them all back on Open deals for Forbidden Door 2024. I probably will, because I'm not really here to "win" the game, just have fun booking.

-Also some of the Open contract guys demanded a 10% wage hike, it's whatever, they are independent contractors and can ask for whatever they want I suppose. It's mostly the lower paid guys on the NJPW crew I won't be using much if at all anyway.

-Staff member Danny Davis retired. I hired him and every other good trainer in the game immediately upon starting, including a bunch of WWE's jettisoned trainers that were good (Norman Smiley, Matt Bloom). Thankfully I've got the workload more than covered.

-Minoru Suzuki turned 55 years old and subsequently has announced he will retire at the end of the month :( alas, I saw that coming which is why I wanted to do the handshake thing with Orange. NJPW are on tour the entire month of July so that was my one and only Suzuki match.

-Main Roster Birthdays (not including NJPW birthdays since they'll be used sparingly, nor ROH birthdays because I have no idea when or if they'll be called up)

The Blade (43)
Dax Harwood (39)
Cezar Bononi (37)
Brandon Cutler (36)
Hikaru Shida (35)
Max Caster (34)
Peter Avalon (34)
John Silver (33)
Tay Melo (28)
Jack Perry (26)
Riho (26)

Next week I'll have over twice as many e-mails because I'll start getting some developmental reports from ROH.

This post is sponsored by the Sphinx's missing nose
 

With a name like the Wingmen, their gimmick should either be old timey pilots or the sidekicks of one guy and they help him land dates. The comedy of the latter writes itself. Like, imagine them macking on Brit Baker and it draws the ire of Cole and it leads to some matches or whatever. It's a good idea to have some anchor talent for a show that's not really considered the flagship. I should probably focus my efforts better in that regard because sometimes I want Superstars to be important and others it's just some matches with guys I'm not using on a consistent basis.

Death by Roderick is a good name. Gaps in overness are often an issue because it kind of reflects real life where a crowd may not really get into a match where it's a main eventer taking on an opener. Like, is the outcome really in doubt? A 10-point difference or less between workers should be a good rule of thumb. Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling is fine because you want people to pay for the really good shit. One thing I wish the game had for the television shows is segment breakdowns and how they did in the TV ratings. There's a segment rating, sure, but I always imagined that to be the audience at the show.

LOL, network cancellation. The closest I've ever come to pissing off my partners is when I bumped up my risk level to 100% just so I could do a Death Match. They were not happy. I spent the PPV money on hookers and blow. I think I got the better end of that deal. Punk and Joe is going to be a great payoff, unless the DUD show wants to be a douche.

Yeah, I've seen some of that Scott Keith commentary and it's all hilarious. It's usually when I would get some random worker in for a one-shot jobber deal to get someone else over. It can be offset if they're in the ring with someone REALLY good who can carry things or if they've got charisma up the yahoo. I've seen it whenever I've stuck a manager into the proceedings. I need to ready myself for when it happens again. There's a match I have lined up down the road that I'm dreading for this reason, but for the sake of the story I feel like it needs to be done. Stay tuned!

An added benefit of starting another game is you get Daniels back into play as a worker as opposed to him switching to non-wrestler in your other game. Do what you can with him while you can because I'm sure the game is looking to screw you regarding him. Of course the alternative may happen like it does with me where he could end up going into his late fifties and refusing to take it easy or hang it up. I know I had Daniels way back when but I honestly can't remember what I did with him as far as feuds go. To me, he was always in the background to guys like Punk, Joe, Styles, and Danielson.

Even a lesser show deserves to have a quality main event. Shame Vince and Company never really wanted to do stuff like this with Main Event and Superstars in its later incarnation. I remember starting fairly strong and then slowly degrading to the fucking D-shows. Like, fine if he's got people that he doesn't want to push, but at the very least stick them on a show like this and let them go all out. It's like, "Yeah, pal, I signed you because they told me you had some great wrestling skills, but I'm just going to give you 5 minutes every 6 six weeks on Saturday Morning Slam and let you be a lumberjack in a Raw main event every so often. Oh, I also need you on hand in case Stephanie needs to emasculate someone in a backstage segment."

This post is sponsored by the Freebird Rule
 

Calling them the Dark Order would be appropriate because it'd be in opposition to what Haven had done and it's the brainchild of a dude called Victor Dark. Although, I'm doing something slightly different here because they're not really a stable, per se. I'm looking to send them all off on their own respective journeys after Bragging Rights as I just need people to keep Haven occupied until the inevitable showdown with Dark himself. It's also going to give me a chance to...oops, wait. I can't give away all the details just yet. :)

The thing with the Wasteland is that they're super over and ridiculously talented. I should probably be pushing them, but I'm bloated as it is. They give a great hand when it comes to filling up the undercard with a quality match at the very least.

Just like with the non-Dark Order angle, I want to stay really tight-lipped about what's in store for Hotbody down the road. I have his whole run mapped out and so far, we're on track, barring the game being a fucking piece of shit. I'm sure you could think of a certain somebody who could be the one to dethrone him for the title. Damn it, I need to pick up the pace so I can get to that part already. :)

I'm likely to do a special edition of SmackDown! to tackle some of these high-profile matches that aren't going to fit on the PPV. Stuff like Ozzy/Demiras, Cross/Jacobs, a tag title rematch, and Clubber/Zed. It'll be a good hoss fest, I'm sure.

The thing about me closing things out with an angle as opposed to a match is that I can only run so many matches in the time between PPVs and it's even worse now when I have a 5-week gap between Survivor Series and Bragging Rights. I figure Cemenko and Reigns could use some more heat and rubbing shoulders with main event guys like Pattillo and the freaking World Champion can only do wonders for them. The thing with Reigns is realistically he doesn't really have anything to do until WrestleMania and he doesn't really have to. He's got his ticket punched already so him participating in matches is kind of a waste of his time. In fact, that gives me an idea for him after Bragging Rights.

This post is sponsored by Eddie and Beat
 

Superstars: December 13, 2040

I think I can afford to be a little laid back here after the hurricanes of both SmackDown! and Raw in the last two shows.

Opening Match: The Love Connection vs. Southern Gentlemen
This is more like it. This is how Raw should've opened up with no pesky DUD show sneaking its way in. I'm thinking of doing a big four way for the tag titles and the Love Connection ought to be one of the teams involved. Aphrodite is her usual sexy self and she adds a lot to the scenery, if not the match. Brody Lee gets isolated towards the end of the match and he's going to fall victim to the Love Letter and unfortunately get pinned by Coleman, giving the faces the win. The Future Foundation come out onto the stage to give Greene and Coleman and Aphrodite some dirty looks and remind them that things aren't over between them. *****, 95% overall

PROMO TIME as it looks like we're going to get Andrea and Victor Dark to deliver some more of their spiel. Victor is disappointed in Orlando Kincaid's refusal to allow his friends to help him. However, he doesn't want Orlando to feel pressured into anything. Victor is a much more forgiving individual than someone like Haven. Victor wants to make it clear to Haven that he doesn't have "grunts" under him. What Quinten McDaniels, Hugo, and Chet have embarked upon is their own doing and they are free to do so. It's not Victor's fault that Haven has made so many enemies. Nonetheless, Victor will monitor the situation very closely. When a man is put out of his misery, you want as close of a view as you can get.

Backstage, Nathan Quinn and Adam Hail are prepped to give Simon Bennett some more of their minds. They want to inform Simon Bennett that Adam accepts Simon's challenge to a match at Bragging Rights. It's not because they believe Simon deserves it, but rather Adam deserves it. Adam deserves the opportunity to finally kick Bennett to the curb with an exclamation point because apparently he didn't get the message the last time. Adam will get to prove that he's better than Simon in every way and show the world that Adam is ready for the big stage. All Adam has ever wanted was to be acknowledged as one of the greatest, and if Simon Bennett is going to deny him that, then let Bragging Rights be the end of him.

Second Match: Ainsley vs. Debra Phillips
Fuck me for putting this after that banger of an opener. I don't know if anyone wouldn't have suffered after that one. You'd think the segments in between would give me some breathing room, but NOOOOO! A crowd reaction rating of 54% is pretty rough. Debra is just not up to snuff in the charisma department to help ease the pain. Either way, before the match Debra talks about merely using Ainsley to get her own foot in the door here in the WWE. It's an every woman for herself scenario once you bust your way in and Ainsley needed to find that out the hard way. She'll be more than happy to leave Ainsley in the dust while she skyrockets to the top. So, yeah, despite the circumstances, technically the match works so that it's not a complete disaster of a segment. They brawl to the outside as the referee begins her count. Debra gets desparate and rakes Ainsley's eyes to stop an onslaught. She goes for both legs and sets Ainsley up for a catapult into the ringpost and that knocks her loopy. Debra quickly slips back in to break the count and unfortunately Ainsley isn't going to be so lucky and that's a countout win for Debra, who bolts as if she's got something on the stove in the back. ****, 75% overall.

Third Match: Neil Quint vs. Sammy Brady
Sammy was Neil's original opponent for Raw until I realized I needed to address the Ozzy Mandias heel turn so he got the spot. Well, now we're here and it's some good shit. Neil is on a path and I've got plans for him. Sammy gets set up for the Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver. Neil starts to climb but Sammy's partner Johnny Dangerson hops on the apron to get in Neil's face. The two exchange some pleasantries until Sammy gets his bearings back and tries attacking Neil from behind. Neil is quicker to the punch and sidesteps Sammy, sending him into Dangerson. Neil gets Sammy back into position and goes up top for the Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver to score the pin. Quint once again leaves the ring undefeated. ****1/2, 90% overall.

We get a video showcasing the awesomeness that is the Woman of the Year, the WWE Women's Champion Sonya Braddock. She had a hell of a year and is looking for a strong closing come Bragging Rights.

Well, that segues perfectly into our next backstage interview with Jenna Kyle and Faith Connors, the Lonely Girls. Jenna is asked about what was shown in that video for Sonya Braddock as that's the woman Jenna needs to beat at Bragging Rights if she wants to win the Women's Title. Jenna points out that it was interesting and captivating and certainly very informative. The one thing it wasn't, however, is scary. Jenna knows scary. That fifth Halloween reboot? Very scary. The band that played at her prom? Also very scary. Sonya Braddock? Not so much. Sonya can be content with her 2040, but Jenna Kyle is set to kick off 2041 on one hell of a positive note. Faith gets her turn to speak as she calls out someone else who isn't scary, that being Dusk. Faith took a chair to the face from her at Survivor Series and she wants more. Faith personifies fearlessness every time she gets in that ring. If Dusk thinks her spooky Spirit Halloween nonsense is going to get the job done against Faith, then all of those nail polish fumes must be going to her head. The Lonely Girls can take anything anyone wants to throw at them.

Fourth Match: Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper vs. The Agents of Change
Harper looks thrilled beyond reason to be here. He wants to thank Jake Connelly for what is a huge opportunity. The chance to learn from and be properly guided by one of the greatest legends the WWE has seen is something he's not going to squander. He hopes Ethan Lang feels the same way and shows it by picking up some more slack because it's a two-man effort. Harper can't always carry things like on Raw. It's OK, though, because they've got another great chance here against Corey Mattis and Clayton North. Ethan looks like he doesn't know how to respond to that, but it doesn't matter as the match gets underway when Harper chucks the mic, not allowing either Connelly or Lang to respond. Nevertheless, Connelly's boys work well here against yet another fairly established team. Lang once again plays the role of getting the hot tag and unloading on the heels. He manages to hit the Bitter Languish on North. Mattis tries attacking Lang as the latter is against the ropes, but Lang ducks and pulls the top rope down causing Mattis to stumble to the outside. Harper gets back into the thick of things and picks up North's body and hits the Cam Jam and gestures to Lang to get the cover. Lang does so with a confused look on his face and gets the victory. Harper goes nuts with the celebrating as things continue to look somewhat good for this new duo of Connelly's. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Fifth Match: Ronnie Costello vs. Randy Ellis
We get back to the battle between Sophie Waters's Academey and what's left over in the camp of Brooke. Sophie tells Brooke that the Academy have found some much better company. She's open to any kind of match Brooke has in mind. She's also open to anyone else who might be tired of their current circumstances and are looking for a change of scenery. Brooke insists that she doesn't have any deserters under her watch because she's managing people with actual brains! She's also managing people with actual guts and Ronnie here is willing to demonstrate that fact. So the match that ensues rules all kinds of ass. The conclusion comes about when Ellis and Ronnie end up on one side of the ring as the former is taking a beating. Sophie goes over to provide some more encouragement, but C4 are over there, too. Carmella starts jawing with Sophie, but Cordelia keeps her eyes on the match. Eventually, Carmella gives Sophie a shove and she responds with a shove of her own, sending Carmella into Cordelia, knocking her into the steps. The ref goes over to break up this chaos and that allows Brooke to slide in a chain to Ronnie and he uses it to KO Randy and that's enough for the cheap pin. Brooke goes over to her girls to sort things out. More trouble brewing? Hey, Ronnie actually gained some overness here. ****1/2, 93% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time, this time with Kyle Jacobs. Kyle Jacobs agrees with the frustrations felt by Xavier Cross over what went down at Survivor Series. Nothing against Alexander Piero and Ryan Pattillo, and he's naturally happy that he walked out with a win, but it wasn't as satisfying as a good old one-on-one, mano y mano, up close and personal battle where Cross still gets his ass kicked. Kyle should know, because he's already done it before. "You remember, don't you, Cross? I pinned you in a big time PPV match and if you lost you'd have to be my servant? I remember. I especially remember what happened afterwards, where you threw a tantrum like a bitch, refused to own up to the deal, watched me return, and then somehow turn into an even bigger bitch by cowering away from me. You talked a big game on Raw, so you'll forgive me for wanting to test your resolve in getting your payback. I am standing here, willing, ready, and able to take the fight to you one more time, Cross. By all means, come forward and make me suffer. Get your retribution! All you have to do is take down little old me. That won't be so hard, right?"

Time for this shiznit to get interrupted and freaking Ziggy Styles of all people feels the need to make himself known. He joins Kyle in the ring and states his business. "Oh, man, the WWE these past few weeks is getting way too hot and way too stressful. Things really need to settle down and bit. Never fear, because I feel with all my heart that deep down in the bowels of this man, Kyle Jacobs, is a rumbling of excitement. A need to just let go and be happy. My friends, I think now is the right time for Kyle Jacobs to Get Ziggy With it!"

Kyle Jacobs merely shoots Ziggy a death stare that doesn't waiver for an instant. Ziggy reads the room and adjusts his focus and continues on. "Well, maybe you're not quite ready just yet. But there is another reason why I felt the need to come on out here and maybe, just maybe, with Kyle and me jiving on similar wavelengths, we can get to that place where you feel like you can get Ziggy with it. You're out here throwing out challenges and all, looking to finally settle old scores and move on to bigger and brighter things. Well, I, too, have some unfinished business and I am absolutely feeling your initiative, Kyle, if not your attitude. I am giving Mr. Michael Haywood a major opportunity here to consider throwing down in one more match to get things square between us. Michael, you didn't need to keep that hold on me for that long at Survivor Series! It's not my fault you're such a stick in the mud! I'm lucky to even be able to talk after what you did! And have I even heard anything remotely close to an apology? No! So the way I see it is this: you owe me, Michael! You owe me this. I deserve my chance to beat you once and for all, so that I may continue on my quest to bring joy and good vibes to the WWE!"

Kyle looks like he's had enough of Ziggy's talk and gets back on the mic to admonish him. "Hate to break it to you, pal, but you stumbled onto the wrong set. This isn't your stupid little talk show and it's certainly not a dance floor. This is a place for actual adult men and if you can't understand that or bring yourself to get involved in that, then you need to go shake your ass somewhere else."

Ziggy tries calming Kyle down BUT HERE COMES XAVIER CROSS! Kyle takes his attention off Ziggy and locks eyes with Cross who is making his way down to the ring. Kyle demands Cross get in the ring, but Ziggy decides to low blow Kyle from behind. Cross immediately gets in and starts to assault Kyle. Ziggy leans back in the corner and observes the attack BUT HERE COMES MICHAEL HAYWOOD!!! Ziggy freaks the hell out as Cross stops his attack and steps in front of a charging Michael. Michael just plows through Cross with a clothesline like he wasn't even there and continues his pursuit of Ziggy, who has decided now might be a good time to take Kyle up on his advice. Both Cross and Kyle start to recover and Kyle goes for the Legacy Bomb but Cross slips out and also decides to bail. If these guys are serious about their respective matches, when will they be taking place?

MAIN EVENT: Quinten McDaniels and Chet Morris vs. The Dillingers
Chet Morris talks about how Orlando Kincaid's rejection hurt, but it can't keep him, Quinten, and Hugo from moving forward. They're all confident that Orlando will eventually come around once he sees what can be accomplished with a bit of introspection and the realization that he needs to overcome his past. Quinten continues by claiming that they can and will handle Haven with or without Orlando. The thing Orlando needs to understand is should he not come around, well, that would be yet another problem from the past that would need correcting. And considering how they've been correcting their problems in recent weeks, it'd be a shame for Orlando to be a part of that. In fact, let Eddy Clash try his hand at the three of them again and it'll be quite clear what's on the horizon for Haven and anyone else that wants to become a problem.

This match is nothing but win as the heels once again shine like a boss. Maybe they really did go through some rejuvenating process. Hugo is on the outside for obvious moral support. He starts to notice that Fantasee might also need some guidance and begins to approach her to make a pitch. Ben Dillinger sees this as the match has broken down to BONZO GONZO levels and tries to dive onto Hugo to intercept him. Hugo catches him in mid-air as poor Joey is left alone in the ring and Quinten sends him into Chet for his Backwoods Bomb variation and that's going to give the heels the win. Meanwhile, Hugo sends Ben through the announce table. These three look strong once more and...WAIT A MINUTE!!! It's Eddy Clash again! He tries to get at Hugo but Quinten and Chet go on the attack and Eddy unfortunately suffers a 3-on-1 beatdown as the heels all grab chairs and just demolish the big man on the outside. We go off the air as we're left to ponder what all this means for the WWE and if anyone can stand against these guys. *****, 97% overall. I mean...damn. I may have stumbled ass backwards into some pretty good angles here.

Overall show rating: 88%

Oh, why did I have to put that women's match there? I could've probably broken the 90% barrier. :nono:

Leah wants me to let her work with Cordelia Capriati as she thinks I'll be impressed with the results.

https://i.imgur.com/adiBjS9.png

Yeah, I can see that.

Cameron Harper thinks he and Lang should be a regular tag team so that they can then use it to springboard their singles careers. Oh, Harper...you sweet summer child. :)

OK I'm even more intrigued with the Dark "stable" now, knowing they're still more or less doing their own thing but not being his underlings. I don't know what the end game is but it'll be fun to follow.

****, 75% overall is literally an amazing rating in my game universe so the idea that in the world of 2040, something like that is viewed as a dud of a segment, good lord just imagine the workrate. a 54% crowd reaction makes me imagine you could hear a pin drop vs. the normal crowd reaction

That main event segment :eek:

LOL Cameron Harper - reading his mannerisms as described I just automatically imagine him as a short little shit trying to overcompensate in any way he can. And I love that he lobbied to stay part of a team :lol:

This post is sponsored by Bubba and Stix
 

For shits and giggles I decided to check for any updates as far as relationships between workers go. Here is what the game has decided for some of the workers:

Adrian Gallagher is loyal to Nate Exley. Not surprising considering their partnership.

Aphrodite loves some schmuck named Marc Godecker who isn't even on the fucking roster.

Arianna dislikes Marcus Dean, who is also not on the fucking roster.

Blaine Bellamey dislikes Robbie Greer. That's your fucking partner, dipshit.

Brody Lee hates El Siliencio. Why? He doesn't say anything. :shifty:

Cameron Harper is friends with Taylor Matheny. She WAS on the roster way back when.

Clayton North is friends with Tiger Mulligan. HOW ARE YOU FUCKERS INTERACTING?!?

Doug Michaels is evidently a blood relative to Emilio London. Half-siblings maybe?

Drakken is friends with Tokyo Kid. Well that's sweet. You'd think my teams would be like Adrian and Exley, gelling and being bros and shit.

El Silencio reciprocates the hatred from Brody Lee. I wonder what happened there.

Galino & Farnes apparently hate each other also. This is making me worry.

Joey Dillinger is friends with Big Coburn. Do my teams just not talk to each other in the back and they need to seek out companionship with people outside of the company?

Justin Mitchell has loyalty to Randy Ellis. See? That's more like it.

L.A. Xander dislikes Devin Nash. I doubt he'd even still be alive at this point, but sure, I can see someone disliking him. Oh, wait, DEVIN Nash? My bad...

Lisa Benton is friends with Mike Preston, yet another fuck not on my roster. I hope none of these fucks are going to try to pressure me into hiring their buddies. Can't you and Riott just seek a close, close intimate relationship with each other? :shifty:

Matt Riley is loyal to Sweet Dreams. Well go fuck off and leave and go be with her if you want it so much.

Nathan Quinn is another fucker making friends with someone not under contract: Mike Majors. I will not be signing him.

Robbie Greer dislikes Lindsey. She's not on the roster, bro. Get over it.

Stephan Q. Sterling is friends with Blazin' Benny Chong and James Watkins, who are two more people not under contract.

Vivian Merrick is friends with J.J. Johnston. Woman, I surrounded you with two guys and it's like you don't even give a shit.

Wu and Tokyo Kid dislike each other. Fuck you all, you bunch of ingrates.

Zachary Vale is loyal to Plague. HOW?!?!? He hasn't been on my roster since fucking 3.0 and you were a God damn training camp worker!!!

And that about does it. I only checked the main roster, but I'll give NXT a looksee sometime and see how little sense I make of what may be going over there.

:lol: brilliant, I completely forgot that worker relationships can change over time (except for ones that existed before the game started, because apparently humans are inflexible to change)

Reading through the FAQ and I think this one in particular can be explained away:

The FAQsays Loyalty exists in 2 main ways - student/trainer and long-time tag partners. My guess is that Plague had Trainer as a secondary worker characteristic, so the implication here is that anyone who can train can potentially develop bonds with your Training Camp workers.

However, that also makes it very surprising that some of your tag teams hate each other. As far as I know, you don't get an e-mail or anything if you pair two workers that hate each other in a tag team. So either they had bad blood that was never noticed before, or the game programmed a mechanism where tag teams apparently spend so much time on the road together that they get on each others' nerves to various levels (hence some having dislike and others having hate)

I'm now imagining the eventual Galino & Farnes breakup resulting in a massive lawsuit over who gets to control the firm, culminating in a Legal Papers on a Pole match. Only downside of course is that the loser will have a huge morale drop from putting over someone they hate, but if you're either trimming the fat or one of them is retiring anyway it would be A+.

The worker relationships in my save data were pretty lazily done. In fairness, the updates are done by one guy over at EWBattleground and he does monthly updates. That's already enough work without bothering to keep changing worker relationships.

For instance I see no Loyalty ones for tag partners. The 2 teams within Dark Order (Evil Uno/Stu Grayson, Alex Reynolds/John Silver) have been teaming for 17 years and 12 years respectively. FTR are definitely loyal etc. Feel like these ones should've been in there. No friendships either.

But they do have Love relationships for the couples and blood relatives for those it applies to.

I don't see any adverse relationships except for one guy......

https://i.imgur.com/3iZ0GNW.jpg

They don't even all fit on the screen (Nick Jackson is underneath). I'm kinda shocked they didn't make Colt Cabana a hate relationship really.

Is it any wonder why I've basically kept The Elite, Jericho, and Mox away from Punk? :lol: I kinda doubt I'll put the title on him since he'll likely never win it again in real life, but I wonder if morale in the company would tank among my top guys if I put it on Punk. Low key want to create a second save file just to see.

Did some more digging and it would seem on GameFAQS the consensus is that tag teams will develop a dislike or hate relationship if there is a perceived imbalance in the tag team.

Things that could cause this include one worker being higher up on the card than the other and beginning to feel "held back" by their partner. Or one worker consistently getting the pins or being the one getting pinned. As an example, by this metric Ron Simmons should've eventually gotten fed up with Bradshaw because he was clearly the one always scoring the victory for the APA.

First off, that's pretty impressive coding/tracking something like that for a 20+ year old game.

Second off, holy shit I can't believe I've had the game this long and never knew about it.

This post is sponsored by the Great Barrier Reef
 

Well here's how things stand with the Wyldhearts and Galino & Farnes. That overness gap might help explain things between Blaine and Robbie, but I'm not sure what's crawling up the ass of Galino and/or Farnes. I wonder how recently these relationship statuses formed and if it's been affecting things, because I haven't noticed.

https://i.imgur.com/ql9ym7S.png

https://i.imgur.com/WPTLA0j.png

https://i.imgur.com/TYFjqw4.png

https://i.imgur.com/pv168j8.png

Also, that Punk screenshot is just gold. Punk not putting up with any horseshit is at least still consistent. :lol:

This post is sponsored by Luke McKay
 

I put off doing more for a bit because of some nonsense, but I have SmackDown! done. I need to get to the report for that one, but another post I did brought up this question: did anyone try doing a simulation game using TPWW posters as the roster? That'd have been fucking amazing.

Yeah I was trying to stay ahead of the real-life calendar but, sadly, life had other plans. Would've rather been gaming that being outside in a cemetery, in a suit on a 100+ degree day but alas.

I'm pretty sure somebody tried doing an EWR game with TPWW posters way back when this game first started, whenever they had a data editor which I think it always did. This would've been 2002 when the game first came out and seemingly everyone was playing it, but also so far back that it pre-dates the current board (2003) so there wouldn't be any record of it.

https://cdn-cache.wrestlingnewssourc...2_711_400.webp

AEW Collision
July 1, 2023
Hamilton, ON, Canada


Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Men's First Round Match: "The Natural" Dustin Rhodes vs. "Switchblade" Jay White

The first round of the Owen Hart Cup kicked off on Wednesday and continues along tonight. The announcers point out that Dustin's been tied up in some other business with the Mogul Embassy, but that is put on hold for tonight as, as one of the few members of the AEW roster to share a locker room with Owen Hart, he wanted to be sure to participate in this.

Anyway these two have a pretty solid match with Dustin bringing an intense brawling and White working a sound brawling tactic in return, mixed with slimy heel sneakiness. Dustin reverses the Blade Runner but White turns it into a roll-up with his hands on the trunks to steal the win!

The production team flash a graphic on the bracket. Jay White next week will face the winner of the other first round match tonight between Ricky Starks and Brian Cage. Also, in the spirit of having Owen's locker room mates compete, the crowd pops as it's revealed that the final first round match that will happen on Dynamite will be......Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy! (side note: god dammit Jeff Jarrett, way to check into rehab at the worst time)

This match got a <b>***1/4, 72% overall rating</b> however the overall was lower than both the crowd reaction and match quality, which means I'm kicking off my July with the first DUD show of the game. And White was one of the most over guys I'm using tonight, ruh roh.

---

Backstage we see a limousine arrive and out walks Samoa Joe! That's certainly a fancier arrival than we're accustomed to seeing from Joe. We last saw Joe attacking Punk after his match at Forbidden Door. Punk's demanded to get Joe face to face tonight.

---

Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Women's First Round Match: NJPW Strong Women's Champion Willow Nightingale vs. Ruby Soho w/ Saraya and Toni Storm

We last saw Willow having a solid outing against Toni next week only to have the match disrupted by the surprise appearance of the ROH Women's champion Athena. Fellow Outcast Saraya lost on Wednesday to Britt Baker. Ruby Soho was a finalist in this tournament a year ago, but this year she doesn't provide much more help to get on the board. Botched interference from Toni leads to Willow picking up the win and just like that, both members of the Outcasts are out of the tournament, ensuring Toni won't be seeing one of her stablemates as a challenger.

The women's bracket is shown, much like with the men's tournament - another first round match is taking place tonight. The aforementioned Athena makes her in-ring return against Riho, with the winner facing Willow next week. On Wednesday, the final first round match will see Emi Sakura face off against Hikaru Shida. <b>**3/4, 62% overall rating</b>

---

We cut to an eerie looking room. At the forefront of it all is “The Redeemer” Miro, fresh off of picking up impressive wins in each of the first two Collision episodes. Miro has a deadly serious expression on his face.

“There are only three things that had motivated me – my TNT Championship, a vengeful god, and a flexible, double-jointed wife. Before two weeks ago, it had been a long time since anybody saw me in AEW. I took my time, I waited for an opportunity. I trusted God to give me a sign when the time would be right to make a return. To give me a higher purpose. I’d been in exile for almost a year. And then at one point I was summoned.

And then when he finally spoke to me, he told me I would be his favorite champion once again. That I would retain my beloved TNT championship gold. That I would receive the glory and adoration. There were his blessings in my muscles that I would never lose again. And all I’d need to do is praise him.

It was at that moment that I realized that this coward was not the one kneel to. The Redeemer kneels before no man or god. So now I know what I must do. I must walk alone and I must be what this fool is not – righteous without seeking reward.

Therefore I now renounce my god, my gold, and my beautiful wife. Because I am Miro, and I am godless.”

---

<b>AEW World Trios Championship: The House of Black (Malakai Black, Brody King, and Buddy Matthews) (C) vs. The Spanish Announce Project (Angelico, Serpentico, and Luther)</b>

I envisioned this open challenge as a glorified squash, which actually parlayed into a decent match rating here. Probably because Serpentico and Angelico are very much guys who can sell their asses off and make everything the House does look like death. Side note – Serpentico is the losingest wrestler in AEW history with a career AEW record of 14-122 as of right now. Fittingly, he also takes the loss here with Buddy pinning him after Matthews Law. <b>***, 63% overall rating</b>

---

As we return from commercial, the House of Black are still in the ring, Malakai with a microphone in hand. Before he can even utter a word, the music of The Acclaimed hits. Out come The Acclaimed and Daddy Ass! No time to chat here tonight, tonight is all about them trying to kick ass. The House exchange a flurry of rights with the faces before eventually taking their leave and deciding to fight another day.

Anthony Bowens grabs a microphone. “House of Black! We still want our Trios title match. You and us, 2 weeks, Blood and Guts. No disqualification.”

A sinister grin works its way across the face of Malakai Black, with a nod to seemingly accept the challenge.

---

Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Women's First Round Match: ROH Women's Champion "The Fallen Goddess" Athena vs. Riho

The first round matches continue and here is where I give the DUD rating a nice hearty fuck you as these two women went out there and proceeded to have the best women's match I've had so far in the game, only to be punished with a lower overall rating than it should have.

The Outcasts were shown backstage watching on, trying not to interfere in this one but Toni Storm clearly not liking seeing Athena here kicking all kinds of ass. Anyway these two beat the shit out of each other with Athena's typical mean streak being matched by the diminutive Riho breaking out every bit of hard-hitting joshi upbringing she could muster.

In the end though it was Athena prevailing with the O-Face, setting up a semi-match with a fellow champion in Willow Nightingale next week! <b>****, 71% overall rating</b>

---

Mark Henry is backstage with the AEW World Tag Team Champions, FTR.

Henry: "Dax, Cash, on Wednesday we saw you guys successfully defend your titles against the Jericho Appreciation Society, only for Bullet Club Gold to send a signal to you. It would seem your issues with them are far from over."

Dax: "You're right Mark, we have a much bigger issue looming with Bullet Club Gold. They seem to like cheap shotting people from behind, and we're not sure why. We've made it clear to everyone that we'll put the titles on the line for anyone that wants to take their shot. All they have to do is name a time and a place."

Cash: "And we know they still want a piece of our good friend Ricky Starks too. He's got business to tend to in just a few minutes against Brian Cage in the Owen Hart tournament. But he's been wanting to get his hands on Bullet Club too, and if he wins tonight he can kill two birds with one stone next week. Hope you're paying attention, Jay White!"

Dax: "Oh and one more thing, we didn't forget about you, Cage. We know you've got your Mogul Embassy friends on speed dial. Don't even think about calling for help, because we've got a few friends who have a score to settle with you."

*Sting and Darby Allin walk on scene, brandishing baseball bats as we go to break*

---

<b>Owen Hart Foundation Cup - Men's First Round Match: "The Machine" Brian Cage w/ Swerve Strickland and Prince Nana vs. "Absolute" Ricky Starks</b>

Our final tournament match of the evening sees Starks opting to go it alone, knowing he's always got backup on hand in case the Mogul Embassy choose to make nuisances of themselves.

To the heels' credit, they opted to let Brian Cage largely do his thing, as the big man dominated the early part of the contest. The announcers reminded us of the bitter history these two have had over the years, dating back to their time together and subsequent fallout in Team Taz.

Starks eventually regains momentum and the Mogul Embassy try to intervene. But true to their backstage appearance, Darby and Sting make their way out to the ring. Swerve tries to play it cool and exit gracefully at the threat of Sting's baseball bat, while Nana is chased around the ring by Darby on a Skateboard.

All of the hijinx around the ring leave Cage alone with Starks in the ring, where Starks impressively gets the big guy up for the Roshambo and the win. Ricky Starks advances to the semi-final as Jay White and the rest of Bullet Club Gold look on from backstage. <b>***, 67% overall rating</b>

---

We see CM Punk backstage, heading out to the ring ready to face Samoa Joe. Mark Henry asks him if he has any words before tonight's main event. Punk tells Mark he has no comments other than the fact that Joe is about to find out that it's clobberin' time.

---

CM Punk makes his way out to the ring, looking focused and determined as he throws his shirt into the stands and waits for Joe's arrival. And waits. And waits. Referee Bryce Remsburg and ring announcer Dasha Gonzalez find themselves asking the same thing - where is Samoa Joe?

After Dasha makes another attempt at introducing him and his music hits again, Joe finally saunters out to the ring but noticeably still in street clothes. He gets into the ring and yanks the mic out of Dasha's hand.

Joe: "Punk, Punk, Punk...we must have a misunderstanding. Last week you said you wanted to see me here on Collision. All week AEW have been saying we'd be facing off one-on-one. But I don't recall AEW ever saying we'd have an actual match.

We've had more than enough matches over the year, Punk. I assumed you'd be tired of that. I just thought we were here to fight."

Punk yells at Joe that he's fine with that, let's just have a fight then. Joe gets right in Punk's face.

Joe: "Good, I'm glad to hear that. Honestly, I'm not paid enough to wrestle you. I beat you almost 2 decades ago, I've got nothing left to prove there.

But if you wanted to fight, well, I've got no prob---"

Joe abruptly cuts himself off as he clocks Punk with the microphone, the cheap shot sending Punk down.

What we have now is the two men getting into a big fight that Joe is very clearly winning with the element of the cheap shot on his side. The slow beat-down of Punk does last for a while, effectively making this a proper main event angle.

The announcers ask what has gotten into Joe, why does he seem to hellbent on actually taking Punk out of commission in this brawl. The fight spills to the outside and a few officials are tossed aside by Joe who has a plan and is damned if he's not going to execute it.

Joe eventually wedges Punk's arm in between the steel steps and the ring post, and he then uses his full body weight to crash into the steps, sending nearly 300 lbs of force on Punk's arm.

Joe leaves the ring smiling as Punk writhes in agony, with the medical staff tending to Punk's damaged arm.

<b>77% overall show rating</b>

In the grand scheme, considering that your roster is loaded with ****1/2 matches even on DUD shows and you pull low 80s, having a 77% DUD show with my roster is nothing to sneeze at at all. That's roughly what I'd expect from a Rampage. Somewhat glad I had a good amount of angles and promos as those aren't as susceptible to the DUD hits as matches are.

This post is sponsored by the waterfalls you shouldn't go chasing
 

The DUD show just loves popping up when you're really expecting a banger. But Dustin pulling out a ***+ match in this day and age should be something worth remembering and praising. Jeff Jarrett being gone definitely sucks as he'd be a fine choice to take the whole thing just out of sympathy and to create a catharsis. The WWE would probably have him go all the way to the finals along with some other sympathetic babyface, then have him get screwed over when the other guy turns heel with the aide of a bunch of other heels to create a stable and then he suffers a beatdown afterwards...in Tennessee.

I could've sworn Joe used to ride in limos in TNA as part of the Main Event Mafia thing. A lot of TNA stuff blurs together so I don't remember it all that well. He SHOULD be doing the Batista thing of dressing like a sharp motherfucker that looks cool and badass.

I can't help but think of the song whenever I see Ruby Soho. If you're not going to give this tournament to Toni Storm, I can only guess that you're going with Willow as secondary to take the whole thing.

I mean, it's hard not to believe in a god when you're blessed with a gorgeous double-jointed wife, but I can get behind something like this. He'd draw millions in the Bible Belt. I often wonder what would he be doing currently had he not left the WWE...aside from his gorgeous double-jointed wife.

Have they modified the game to where you can do a six-man championship? I know which collection of superstars I'd slap those puppies on over on my roster. Is there someone actually keeping track of the win/loss records of wrestlers? That's some dedication for sure. Jesus, even the Detroit Lions would be probably be all, "Wow, what a loser." He joins the elite company that is JTG, Curt Hawkins, Slam Master J, and Heath Slater.

The Acclaimed and Daddy Ass should unite under one solid team name if they're serious about this. How about The Acclaimed Ass? Find a way to get Toni Storm with them and it's a gold mine, I tell you.

Aw, that stings. A solid 4 stars and the game is just "LOL". I'm very curious as to what Athena's O-Face looks like...along with the other women...

I actually had to re-read that last bit to make sure it said what I thought it said. I would've thought Darby would be chasing someone WITH his skateboard, not actually ON it. Now I'm trying to visualize that and it's all kinds of hilarious. The DUD show continues to be a dick, unfortunately.

This is the kind of stuff that fans who have been following the careers of both men would absolutely dig. Digging up the past and using it for fuel is what makes angles work. I also love the dichotomy of Joe being all, "Meh, I've got nothing to prove, but I'm still just going to be a dick to you and beat you up CAUSE I CAN!" Doing the main event angle is nothing to shy away from when you've got people who the audience gives a shit about. Plus, you got two other shows where a match can close things out. In terms of the real world, it's nice to give your guys a break and the fans some variety.

Yeah, this version of EWR is hella weird considering 3.0 would have a DUD show and knock off at least a star and a half along with the low percentage rating for the matches. Willow/Soho would have been 2 stars at best and Scott Keith would be pointing out flaws in his commentary. This is another reason why doing angles, especially a really strong main event segment, is important as they're spared from the ravages of the DUD show for some reason. That's actually my dirty little secret as to why some of my DUD shows still turn out fairly well. I should probably start putting in the ratings for those segments. I need to use whatever spare time I have later today to get back at it. I was in such a nice little groove these last few weeks.

Yeah there were some fun possibilities for Jarrett. I probably wouldn't have had him win it all given a title shot being at stake but I'd have at least thought about it. I suspect the game is going to give me the "one week til retirement" notice after July, and if so I could've quickly turned him face and had him put over MJF on the way out.

Man I forgot so much about TNA, even some of their bigger angles. And I say this as someone who watched them regularly for a while, and was all but desperately rooting for them to gain some traction to give WWE actual competition so they couldn't just coast anymore.

She actually used it as her theme upon joining AEW. Was given the blessing of Rancid and all of that (Rancid being super tight with CM Punk surely helped matter sas well). Since she's turned heel and joined the Outcasts though she's using their generic ass heel rock music which is a shame.

I've left both Toni (as well as Kris Stat) out of the tourney as a shot at an AEW title is a prize for winning. But I'm purposefully vague on when the title shot will happen. I imagine it as sorta a hybrid MITB. You can't cash in as a surprise but you can get your title shot at any time with a one week notice. I don't really imagine an expiration date either, you're just guaranteed a one-time title shot whenever you decide you want it. Makes it easier to, say, have a heel win this thing even if there's a heel champ at the moment.

Gotta say, I straight up ripped this promo from one he did 2 weeks ago in real life. Thought it was so good and better than what I'd come up with, curious to see where they take his character in reality.

[quote]Have they modified the game to where you can do a six-man championship? I know which collection of superstars I'd slap those puppies on over on my roster. Is there someone actually keeping track of the win/loss records of wrestlers? That's some dedication for sure. Jesus, even the Detroit Lions would be probably be all, "Wow, what a loser." He joins the elite company that is JTG, Curt Hawkins, Slam Master J, and Heath Slater.

Nah, the Trios belts don't exist in-game, just gotta use my imagination for that one. But there are tons of stables in AEW so I like having the "imaginary" belts around.

As for records, AEW does track everything back to the inception of the company and the records are kept on the roster page. For example:

https://i.imgur.com/QarJTOf.jpg

5 tag wins + 8 trios wins = 13 wins. The 14th win was a 10-man tag back in February. 8-man tags, 10-man tags, battle royals or whatever else still count toward the record but only singles/tag/trios for the current year are shown separately.

I'm not tracking records since it would be too cumbersome, BUT this is the first time I've booked Serpentico and I took a gander at that poor bastard's record. :lol:

Aw, that stings. A solid 4 stars and the game is just "LOL". I'm very curious as to what Athena's O-Face looks like...along with the other women...

https://media.tenor.com/ngdrtQ8u10YA...he-eclipse.gif

Given that Darby Allin is friends with Tony Hawk, I'm sad that there wasn't proper Darby facepaint in the THPS 1+2 remake or I totally would've made him as my custom skater instead of making a half-assed version of myself. Maybe in the THPS 3 + 4 remake (please Activision...please put that project back in motion :'( )

I like the idea of Joe still knowing Punk's never beaten him. Of course in the real-life AEW this just changed over the weekend with Punker finally getting one over on Joe, but I enjoy the idea of keeping it going here. And perhaps this angle is to build to a match where Punk can finally beat him without actually pinning him, always giving the heel something he can be a dick about later :shifty:

I quite appreciate the way they do it in this game. In theory, good wrestlers can still have good matches even on a DUD show. Yes, good wrestlers can also have an off-night but I'd say the majority of the time, the good'uns are gonna be able to do their thing even if the crowd isn't feeling it, the announcers are having a bad day, the "vibe" is just off etc

Of course you end up seeing the differences in overall rating anyway. I do try to limit myself to 5/6 matches per TV show at most with the rest being angles, both to hedge against a DUD and also for realism. I'd low key have a hard time booking an Attitude Era show realistically in this game, it wasn't unusual to have 10+ matches on a 2-hour Raw, but they were all like 2 minutes long. That era really was just all about the angles.

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SmackDown!: December 14, 2040

Let's see if I can get back on schedule here.

Opening Match: Ziggy Styles vs. Stone Walsh
Ziggy takes the mic and declares that he feels a great deal of sadness and pity for people who don't have it in them to get Ziggy with it. Those people cling on ever so desperately to their darkness and failures and it ruins them! Take Michael Haywood for instance. The destruction of his little group was no one else's fault but his own, and now he thinks that gives him leeway to just be a big meanie to everyone! To the credit of his former teammates, Ryan Pattillo has a chance to become the new Unified World Champion come Bragging Rights, and Gavin Jones also has a championship opportunity at the same event! What's Michael been doing? He's been nothing but a sour puss! "I've only been trying to help! But I am not without mercy and generosity. I am offering Michael his own day in the sun by challenging him to face me next week! It's high time we put this business of ours to rest and see what is more powerful here in the WWE: your cancerous negativity or the positive energy that is the Zig-Meister!" Ziggy's stupidity aside, this is a banger of an opener. Walsh is someone else who should be in a better position considering his attributes, but alas, he has to play the role of making this doofus look good here. The top turnbuckle in one corner gets exposed by Ziggy during the match and it comes to into play in the end as Ziggy escapes an attempt at the Stone Cutter from Walsh. He slips behind Walsh and yanks him into the exposed steel and catches Walsh in a small package off the rebound to score the pin. No time for celebration as HERE COMES MICHAEL HAYWOOD after the match to help Ziggy get his steps in for the day and chase him and the two go off into the night through the crowd. *****, 94% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Hotbody gets on the mic as he wants to talk about Gavin Jones. "Ladies and gentlemen, if there was ever a time when I needed your support and well wishes, it is definitely now. The thought of a degenerate holding this Cruiserweight Title quite frankly makes me a little nervous. Gavin Jones, last week you defiled the beautiful Slammys that I and Madison EARNED! You're lucky none of them were scratched otherwise you would've been hit with a lawsuit from Galino & Farnes so hard you'd think you were hit by a bus! But Gavin is just the latest in a long line of people who want to take away the things that I have worked so hard to obtain, and he thinks he can do it by being an annoyance and a punk. Well, if there's one thing that I can't stand, it's a goof! I will absolutely not tolerate silliness while I'm the champion, and the amount of arrogance that you have, Gavin, in thinking that you of all people are going to be one to end the year that was Michael Hotbody is a clown show! But the thing is, I don't fear clowns. I punch them in their stupid noses and stomp their teeth in. The time for funny business is over, Gavin, because you're not going to be laughing come Bragging Rights. When it's all said and done, the term "tears of a clown" will never be more appropriate!"

This calls for the number one contender himself to interrupt the show and make himself a guest. Gavin Jones steps into the ring with a mic and gets in Hotbody's face. "You know, you can run me down about goofing off, but if you'd been paying attention to me and all of the Hunters, you'd know that when something serious like gold is on the line, we all get serious about that business. And you? Your big claim to fame when the going gets tough is to whine and find an excuse to explain why you're not a man."

"Hey! Who the hell do..."

"NO, THIS IS WHERE YOU ZIP IT!" Gavin explodes. "90% of your entire God damn career here ever since you showed up is you flapping those gums of yours! So right now, you don't get to speak. You've done enough talking! You're going to stand there and listen and you had better listen good! Every cheap shot you take at me, that's one body part of yours I'm going to break at Bragging Rights. Every insult you throw towards my former teammates, that's another body part I'm going to break at Bragging Rights. Every dumb tactic you might try to get out of this, well, hell, I won't wait until Bragging Rights to break something. You think me a clown? Well, that's going to be one hell of a boot shoved up your ass. Keep your Slammys. Keep that jezebel of yours. Keep your stupid lawyers. Keep that big dumb oaf. I hope they all provide you comfort when I take that Cruiserweight Title from you!"

With that, Gavin shoves his microphone into Hotbody and makes his way to leave the ring, but Hotbody isn't phased by the words we all just heard and takes offense to it all and makes the decision to jump Gavin from behind. He stomps on Gavin a couple of times, screaming at Gavin and asking him who the hell he think he is. He tries going for a Hot Ticket, but Gavin grabs Hotbody's leg and latches on. Hotbody panics and kicks away with his free leg and bails once he's free. Gavin glares at the champion as the latter makes his escape.

Second Match: Leah vs. Cordelia Capriati
Cordelia has Brooke with her, but she doesn't look particularly thrilled about it. Leah may have business with the Southern Belles come Bragging Rights, but she's all focused here and shit. This is another fucking sweet women's encounter, with some good back and forth shit. Sadly, it has to get ruined by Hannah McCormick who is looking to ruin things for Leah. Leah tries a Sultry Splash, but Hannah pulls the rope causing Leah to slip and tumble. That's going to be a DQ. Hannah slips into the ring and looks to get her some of Leah. Cordelia recovers and is understandably miffed at this turn of events and spins Hannah around to get in her face. The two argue for a bit, but Brooke hops up on the apron and tries to reason with Cordelia, beckoning her to just back off and let it go and take her leave. Cordelia turns around and starts to leave, but Leah is back up on her feet and drop kicks Hannah into Cordelia. Cordelia responds by turning around and knocking Hannah down with a forearm! She must've though Hannah pushed her on purpose! Leah grabs Hannah and tosses her out of the ring. Brooke is incredulous as it looks like she's losing more and more control over her ranks. ****1/2, 87% overall.

Third Match: Neil Quint vs. Johnny Dangerson
Gotta keep Neil's momentum going. He's already trounced Sammy Brady. Let's see how he fares against his more experienced tag team partner. Johnny may have the better name, but his future isn't as bright as other people on the roster. Case in point, Neil has Johnny down and set up for the Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver. Sammy Brady slides in and covers Johnny's prone body and tries to call off Neil from executing the move. Neil says "Fuck it" and comes off with the move anyway on both men and that's going to be enough to give Neil the victory via pinfall. ****1/4, 89% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as we're joined by the Woman of the Year, the WWE Women's Champion Sonya Braddock! She brings up the year that she had and how she was looking forward to bringing closure to it all. "That closure would've come by getting a chance to once again make Naomi Bailey my bitch and knocking her ass out. I was actually on board with her complaining and lobbying because it was going to make it all the more sweet when I still walked away from that fight with this belt on my shoulder. Now, Naomi isn't cleared to compete, but in a way I've got something even better lined up come Bragging Rights. I've got Jenna Kyle. And while Naomi's humiliating defeat would satisfy me because I'd be destroying a big mouthed pretender to my throne, beating Jenna Kyle is a whole other beast. You see, Jenna, you're one of the few women who has managed to elude utter destruction at my hand. And look at all you managed to acheive. You racked up 3 Slammy wins for some of the biggest historical moments this year alone. As Woman of the Year, and as the WWE Women's Champion, what kind of person would I be if I let all of that go unchallenged. You're the unicorn, Jenna. You are just the thing that's going to help put a nice bow on this year. Everyone will be able to take a step back and look at that package and they'll be able to say that Sonya Braddock made that and she made it because she was the best. It's nothing personal, Jenna, but you know how things go. And upsetting you will be just the message I need to be sent to Naomi to let her know what's waiting for her when she's ready to go another round."

Well, like before with Hotbody and Gavin, this is the time for the number one contender to come on out here and give their take on the matter. Jenna Kyle comes on down and shows no fear getting into the ring with Braddock as she takes the mic.

"Let's clear up a misconception you seem to have, Sonya. I am not now nor will I ever be made a stepping stone or an example. I am a 3 time Women's Champion. I am a two time, back-to-back Queen of the Ring winner. I made history with Faith Connors by being part of the first team to capture the Women's Tag Team Titles. So, yeah, getting one over on me would be a pretty big deal. Which is why you're going to have such a hard time pulling it off. I promise you right here and now, if you walk into Bragging Rights thinking you've got it in the bag, your hopes of ever getting that chance to humilitate Naomi are dead before you even climb in between the ropes. I'm on my own path towards redemption, Sonya, so I hope you understand that it also isn't personal and that you don't take it as such when I take that title for the fourth time."

Sonya smirks as she circles Jenna while making her retort. "If I say you're a stepping stone, then a stepping stone is what you'll be. Everyone eventually gets crushed. But you don't need to take my word for it. The next time you have yourself a heart to heart with your pal Faith, I want you to ask her yourself how things went for her earlier this year. In fact, if things had gone even worse, you probably wouldn't have had someone to call a partner. I believe you when you say that you're not going to make things easy for me, but unless you've grown more vicious, unless you're willing to go to that dark place in your mind, and unless you've grown a stomach for the unpleasant, you don't have a prayer at Bragging Rights. Take solace in what you have managed to accomplish, Jenna. Let that be more than enough."

Jenna steps up to Sonya and looks the champion in the eye. "Until I get that title off of you, Sonya, it's never going to be enough. I'll see you at Bragging Rights." And with that we go to break as the two women stare each other down.

Fourth Match: The Royal Effect vs. The Tokyo Titans
The Royal Effect are, of course, due their rematch for the Unified Tag Team Titles, something we're all looking forward to. They have their Slammys with them and they take the time to remind the audience that they won the award for Tag Team of the Year because they are just too damn good to ignore. They are making it their new year's resolution to start the next year as the champions! The dislike between the two members of the face team has no noticable effect on the match as things are cooking. Things break down as it's BONZO GONZO and Wu and McKay are the legal men with Kavovit and Tokyo Kid fighting on the outside. The ref is distracted with the outside brawl and he goes out to check on Wu when Kavovit sends him into the steps. Kavovit slips McKay one of the Slammy awards while the ref is busy and McKay clobbers Wu with it. Kavovit informs the ref of the pinfall attempt and the shenanigans lead to the three count giving the Royal Effect another win. *****, 96% overall.

To the back we go as we see Jake Connelly waiting on his clients for the next match when Cameron Harper steps up to him. Jake looks confused as to Cameron's presence and asks him what he's doing here seeing as Jake didn't arrange a match for Cameron. Cameron says that he's here to continue showing his gratitude and loyalty to the Jake Connelly brand and he wants to lend a hand in any way he can. After all, Zoey and Katie are also his fellow clients so he should be working with them, too. Connelly says that he appreciates the gesture, but after the last couple of outings with Ethan Lang, Cameron might need a bit more seasoning with him before branching out. Cameron should consider it a hard rule with Connelly, in that if you're not booked, you're not needed. Connelly has got this covered. Cameron looks dejected, but he says that he understands and apologizes for stepping out of bounds. He wishes Connelly luck and takes his leave.

Fifth Match: The Lady Liberties vs. The Brooklyn Sisterhood
Zoey and Katie have themselves quite the test here with the monstrous veterans in Billie Padgett and Emma Edwards. Fortunately, Jake Connelly is behind them as their manager and mentor. Nothing can wrong! Right? Well, after a pretty cool underdog vs. monster match, things boil down to Billie and Katie. Cameron Harper decides his fellow clients are in need of his assistance despite what Connelly said earlier and comes on down and hops up on the apron to play cheerleader. Connelly is confused as all fuck and goes over to talk him down. Katie escapes an attempt from Billie at the Red Hook and she tries to run off the ropes for her next move but stops when she sees Cameron in the way. She's just as puzzled as everyone else but Cameron continues to encourage her. Billie comes up from behind and shoves Katie into Cameron, knocking him off, and that allows Billie to hit the Red Hook and give the Sisterhood the pin. That's actually their first loss since coming under the wing of Connelly. Speaking of which, he doesn't look too thrilled with Cameron's actions. ****1/2, 89% overall.

PROMO TIME as the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk feels the need to address his upcoming match with Ryan Pattillo. He tells Pattillo that the two of them have had this dance before and it didn't end so well for Pattillo. He asks us all to think about the fact that the previous encounter between the two of them didn't even have the belts on the line and Wrakk was STILL willing to brutalize Pattillo beyond belief. Just imagine what's in store for Bragging Rights now that that piece of crap is daring to try to take away the one thing that Wrakk thought about day in and day out for that entire year that was stolen from him. Ryan is trying his best to lash out at the cruel, cruel world that had forgotten him and do what he can to right what he perceives as wrongs. Wrakk can emphathize somewhat, but none of that is Wrakk's fault or problem. Now the embarrassment that Ryan is going to suffer at Bragging Rights? Well, that's going to be all Wrakk's fault and he's going to laugh about it. Wrakk has come too far to let it get taken away. And as far as Brandon Reigns goes? That moment of vulnerability on Raw is something he should remember for the rest of his life, because Reigns is never going to have another opportunity like that again. Not while Wrakk is the WWE Unified World Champion.

Sixth Match: Eddy Clash vs. Chet Morris
Good to get Eddy back into the thick of things. He's really had a roller coaster of a time since his debut. I didn't really think of sticking him where I'm going to stick him for Bragging Rights. Oops. Got to save that bit for later. Anyways, Eddy is out for revenge and he's his usual monstrous self, but Chet isn't going down easy. It's an awesome brawl, but Eddy gets Chet set up for the Thunderstrike and that's going to cause Hugo to slide in to save Chet by attacking Eddy for the DQ. It looks like we're going to get another beatdown BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT!!! Everyone freaks out and when they come back on Haven is in front of Quinten McDaniels in the aisle and he takes him out with a choke slam. He then slides into the ring to even things up. Things start to look bad as Haven looks like he can't do much against Hugo and the latter starts to hammer the Dark Shepherd silly in retaliation. Haven goes down in the corner and looks like he's toast, but Eddy disposes of Chet and just rams his entire body into Hugo knocking the big man through the ropes and to the outside. He runs out to the timekeeper's area to grab a chair and slides back in to ward off the heels. It looks like Haven has himself an ally in this battle. But three on two hardly seems fair. Hmmmm.... ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Seth Von Kamp and Kyle Jacobs vs. Chris Collins and Xavier Cross
Kyle Jacobs declares that he's ready to go against Xavier anytime he wants to put pen to paper. What happened to Cross at Survivor Series was unfortunate, but he shouldn't have signed up if he was going to whine about the outcome. Kyle says that he would've much preferred going one-on-one with Cross and he can't think of any reason why that can't happen now, other than Cross not being as bold as he wants us to believe. "So name the time and place, Cross, and I'll finish what I started all that time ago." This is one excellent choice for a main event as the rating shows. It breaks down and Seth and Collins are the legal men. The ref tries to get things back in control with Cross and Jacobs fighting on the outside. Jacobs stalks Cross but Cross suckers him in and kicks the ring steps into Kyle's knee. Cross goes in for the kill and delivers a Cross Cutter ON THE STEPS! While this is happening Collins snatches Seth's Intercontinental Title belt from ringside and clobbers the champion from behind with it. He disposes of the evidence and picks up Seth's carcass and hits the Fall From Heaven as the ref gets his attention back to the match as EMTs attend to Kyle Jacobs. The pinfall is academic after that as Collins BUILDS MOMENTUM for Bragging Rights. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%

:lol: Ziggy's promo was great. I'm a fan of a heel just using tons of corny language. I also think Positively Page was a low key banger of a gimmick so I'm happy with any sort of "overly happy heel" gimmick.

And then doubling it up with the Hotbody/Gavin promo was gold too. Gavin cuts a nice promo and damn, Hotbody gives his opponents so much to work with it really does get crowds thinking that maybe, just maybe, this is the time when he can finally get taken down.

Heels now having the Slammy Award available to be used as a weapon = ratings, classic heelery there

Oooh, Eddy Clash and Haven teaming up now for THE GREATER GOOD. I like that. 2 on 3 does hardly seem fair, even if EWR allows it. But it's a hell of a spot for someone else to come in and form an unlikely bond.

Nice to see the DUD show disappeared and fucked off into the ether. The usual goodness here and lots of BUILDING MOMENTUM!

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Raw: December 17, 2040

We open with our illustrious General Manager Lisa Benton on the stage, where she's got presents all over the place. She's excited about tonight and has a lot to announce. This time of year is her favorite as it's all about the holiday season. She can't wait to get the festivities started so she's going to kick them off a little early. So tonight is hereby dubbed Christmas Comes Early Night! She has three very important presents that she wants to give away to a lucky few, all of which will have a bearing on their respective matches at Bragging Rights. Also, SmackDown! next week is not just the last SmackDown! before Bragging Rights, but also the the last SmackDown! of the year, so it's only fitting to try to make it extra special. It'll be a SmackDown! Send-off. She has some great matches planned for that event, but we have to get through tonight first. Right now she wants to give away the first present and it's going to be awarded to the winner of this opening match!

Opening Match: Orlando Kincaid vs. Cameron Harper
Harper is with Jake Connelly and he gets on the mic, declaring that he wants to let everyone know that he apologized to Jake Connelly in a major way over what happened on SmackDown! this past Friday. "I was overly enthusiastic and I let it cause me to overstep my boundaries. But I just want Jake and everyone to understand that this is such a huge deal for me. Being under the guidance of one of the biggest stars, one of the greatest legends, of the industry is overwhemling and it's tough to keep a lid on some of these emotions. Nevertheless, I am more than prepared to make it up to you, Jake. I don't know what's in that box that Lisa Benton is giving way, but I'm sure it's good and I'm sure it's worth kicking ass over, so let's do this!" Both participants do indeed do this as this gets us up and running in a strong fashion. After an awesome exchange things come to an end when Harper goes for a pin after a superplex. Kincaid saves himself from a three count by placing his foot on the bottom rope at the last second. Harper thinks he's got the win, however, and leaps off in celebration. Jake Connelly and the ref both try letting Harper know that the match isn't over but he's not hearing it and he turns to Connelly on the outside, posturing for approval. Connelly keeps pointing at Kincaid who is behind Harper and has recovered and nails Harper with a German suplex with a bridge to get the actual pin and the present, whatever that may be.

Post-match, Harper is dejected as Kincaid makes his way back up the ramp to the stage. Lisa Benton stands there waiting for him next to the present that he's won and tell him that he's free to open it now. Kincaid has a "WTF" kind of look on his face about all of this, but nonetheless goes forward with opening the box and taking out what's inside. It looks like...a contract?

Lisa Benton clarifies what it is. "What you have in your hand, Orlando, is a document giving you the right to book your own match for Bragging Rights. There are some limitations, of course, as we already have some matches set, but outside of those parameters, you've got final say. Choose wisely...and happy holidays." Kincaid's confused expression turns into a sly grin, no doubt contemplating the possibilities as he looks at the contract. What will he end up doing? ****1/2, 92% overall.

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Backstage, Jordan Demiras has some thoughts on Ozzy Mandias that he wants to share. Jordan 100% believed in Ozzy and in the future that he was going to have here in the WWE. But then he got bitter. He got bitter and angry and desperate and foolish. That foolishness drove him to cross Jordan Demiras. "Well, now that future Ozzy had? It's not looking too bright. Let him come and try to bring that bitterness and anger to my doorstep one more time."

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Second Match: The Lonely Girls vs. C4
Brooke once again gets on the mic and demands unity from her clients. She believes that no doubt Randy Ellis and Justin Mitchell and Sophie Waters are having a laugh at her misfortunes and one of the last things Brooke wants to be known as is a laughingstock. So this match rules all kinds of ass. Jenna and Faith are just a well-oiled machine. Jenna, naturally, has to stand out here as she's got Braddock lined up at the PPV. Dusk decides she wants to make her presence known and comes out to the stage to observe, catching the attention of Faith. The trouble comes not from Dusk, however, as there's miscommunication over on the heel side of things. Carmella holds Jenna as Cordelia looks to nail her with a clothesline. Jenna escapes and rolls out of the way. Cordelia stops herself in time and she and Carmella have a few words. Faith takes advantage of this exchange to try a Mirror's Edge on Carmella. Carmella moves out of the way and Faith hits Cordelia. Jenna tackles Carmella out of the ring as Faith goes for the pin on Cordelia and gets the duke. The Lonely Girls take their leave in celebration, but that's not the end of this ordeal as Brooke is furious at what went down and starts to berate Cordelia. Well, that's all she can stands and she can stands no more as Cordelia just drops Brooke with a forearm and then proceeds to toss her to the outside into Carmella. Looks like a face turn to me and the crowd seems to agree. *****, 95% overall. I think the turn is what put it over the top.

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Third Match: Simon Bennett vs. Lonny Richards
Lisa Benton is back out on the stage standing next to a very large present and explains the conditions as to how it's going to be won. It will go to either Simon Bennett or Adam Hail, whose match at Bragging Rights has been made official. Simon will compete first here tonight and should he win, Adam Hail has a chance to take the prize if he can win his own match later tonight by beating Simon's time. If Adam can't do that, then Simon will get the prize. Should Simon lose right here and now, though, Adam will take it by default. So let's get down to business and kick things off.

The match is solid and naturally there is a sense of urgency from Bennett to wrap things up as quickly as possible. Things come to a head when Lonny tries locking in the Dragon Sleeper, but Bennett forces the two of them to the corner, causing Lonny to lose his grip. Bennett snap mares Lonny over and locks in the Bennet Lock to score the submission win. It's going to be all up to Adam Hail later tonight to try to do better. ****1/2, 91% overall.

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We go backstage again as Orlando Kincaid is gathering his things, apparently getting ready to leave for the night. Quinten McDaniels decides to approach him and make another overture. Orlando looks annoyed as he asks Quinten what he wants. Quinten expresses his dismay over Orlando's decision to not be part of the tremendous undertaking that Victor Dark has begun. Haven is still up and about and he made fools out Quinten, Hugo, and Chet when he made his return. Had Orlando been part of this great movement like the three of them wanted, there's no doubt Haven would've been struck down by a unified force that even he couldn't overcome.

Orlando breaks up the tirade by pointing out that he doesn't give a damn about any of that. "I didn't care when the three of you got all up in my face and asked me about this whole nonsense, and I don't care now. I've got a lot on my mind with what I picked up earlier tonight...on my own, I might add."

"Well, that brings me to why I'm here, Orlando," Quinten continues. "That's a lot of power in your hands right there with that contract. Imagine it, Orlando; 4 of us all against one man. One selfish man who let all of us down, and you wield the power to make him pay and suffer and quite possibly hang things up for good. Out of sight, out of mind, and we can all move on. And all you have to do is let us in and help."

"You know, I'm glad it's just us one-on-one right now, because maybe your hearing will be much better this time around. I'm not interested in whatever it is you're selling. I don't care about Victor Dark. I don't care about Haven. If you still got issues, go see a God damn therapist. Just leave me the hell alone. The whole Order thing collapsing and scattering us all over was probably the best thing to happen to me to date. I haven't needed any of y'all since and that's not looking to change anytime soon."

"Orlando, I'm going to still cling onto a small sliver of faith that you'll come around, because the alternative isn't pretty. The alternative is me being pissed off at you."

"Then you should get therapy for that, too." And with that final line, Orlando takes his leave.

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To another location in the back we go as Andrea is with Victor Dark as they feel the need to address Haven again. They talk about how dangerous it is for Haven to gain power. That's why intervention was necessary at Survivor Series, because making Haven into a figurehead just opens the doors to more of his manipulation and smoke and mirrors. Haven serves himself and no one else. Let that be something that needs to sink in to anyone who might be thinking of aligning with Haven. The destruction of Haven is inevitable. There's no need for anyone else to suffer the same fate.

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Fourth Match: Gavin Jones and Clubber Harris vs. Galino & Farnes
Lisa Benton is back out as she declares that this match is also for one of the presents she's giving away, with the prize affecting the match between Gavin and Hotbody for the Cruiserweight Title at Bragging Rights. The winning team will claim the present, with Galino & Farnes being the representatives for Michael Hotbody. Lisa also announces that Clubber Harris vs. Zed Jones will be one of the feature matches for next week's SmackDown! Send Off.

Michael Hotbody isn't deterred by these declarations. He has worked so hard and so long to ascend the ladder to where he is now. Rung by rung, commoner by commoner, the voyage to the top hasn't been easy, but prevailing in the face of adversity and hostility has been the name of the game. But by all means, opening presents is always fun, so he'll be happy to take whatever's in that box. So the match gets underway and it's fun all around. Things break down towards the end as the ref is distracted with Hotbody on the apron. Harris and Farnes are legal and Harris stalks the latter as he's getting to his feet. Zed Jones tries sneaking in with a big boot but Harris moves out of the way and Farnes eats the boot instead. Gavin dives into Hotbody, taking him off the apron and Harris tosses Zed. Farnes then falls victim to the Club Pain and that's going to give the faces the win via pinfall.

The heels are all kinds of upset as Gavin and Harris make their way back up the ramp. Lisa greets Gavin with his present and tells him to open it. Gavin does so and what should be inside but...another contract? Lisa explains that this particular contract awards the holder the right to name the stipulation for their match at Bragging Rights. Lisa tells Gavin that this is a big decision and she doesn't expect him to come up with an idea anytime soon, so he's welcome to take some time to think about it.

Gavin isn't having that and he takes the mic. "Actually, I don't see a reason why I can't name the stipulation right now. Hotbody, you wanted to talk about climbing the proverbial ladder? Well, climbing a real one should be no problem. So at Bragging Rights, our match for that Cruiserweight Title you're holding, is going to be...A LADDER MATCH!" The crowd pops in enthusiastic glee as Hotbody throws a fit. Maybe Gavin has found the magic key to ending Hotbody's reign? *****, 95% overall.

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Fifth Match: Brandon Reigns vs. Jordan Demiras
Brandon Reigns does a little pre-match gabbing, talking about how his match with Kerry Cemenko at Bragging Rights is about justifying the award he received. Reigns has no problem stepping up to the challenge because he's not insecure. Superstar of the Year isn't some gimmick. It's a reality. Reigns talked the big game at the award ceremony because he's not afraid of backing it up. Cemenko made the right move...he just made it against the wrong person. This is another great outing for the night. Demiras plays underdog, but he holds strong against the Money in the Bank winner. Unfortunately, Ozzy Mandias must've heard Jordan's comments earlier and he comes out to ruin things. He does so by shoving Demiras off the ropes when he goes for an Axe Kick and that causes Demiras to land into the waiting arms of Reigns and into the Reignfire to give him the pinfall win. Ozzy stands over Jordan's body and berates him while Reigns starts to take his leave and goes to gather his briefcase. However, when he goes to collect it, Kerry Cemenko is on the other side of the barrier next to the case. Kerry teases going for the case and it's a game of chicken as Cemenko and Reigns stare each other down. Ultimately, security comes to get in Cemenko's way allowing Reigns to take the case and retreat while shouting some less-than-friendly verbage towards Cemenko. *****, 95% overall. I mean, God damn.

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In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as this time around we're going to be blessed to hear from Michael Haywood. "I'm going to try to make this short as there's been enough chatter tonight and I'm sure you're sick of it. I know I am. Sure, you can chalk it up to me not being much of a speaker to begin with and it's hard dealing with so many loud mouths, but boy, has there been one particular son of a bitch that's just been asking for a fist down his throat, and that's Ziggy Styles. Ziggy, I am not now or ever will be down with 'getting Ziggy with it'. None of these people are interested either. What they are interested in is when they'll get to see me finally shut that trap of yours. Well, consider your challenge accepted, but it's come to my attention that Lisa Benton is going to hold that encounter next week on SmackDown! Send Off. And how fitting is that, Ziggy, because I know just the way to give you your own little send off: your broken body being wheeled out of the building."

This is going to open the door for Ryan Pattillo to come on out and join Michael in the ring. Everyone's surprised, but happy as it's been a while since the two have shared the ring. Pattillo takes the mic and starts his spiel. "It's so odd how things change with enough time, but still manage to stay the same in a lot of ways. The last time you and I were in the ring together, Michael, it was one of the most difficult things I think either one of us had to do. Fast forward to right now, however, and I don't believe for a second that any of us let that night get the better of us. Here we stand, more determined than ever, and still the winners we've always been. We can't rewind things and they'll never be like they were, but that doesn't mean they can't be good again. Gavin has got Bragging Rights in the bag. You are on your way towards teaching Ziggy Styles what real rage is all about. And of course, I've got Wrakk's number, and even though I can't get back our crew, I damn sure can get back that Unified World Title."

Cue the music of the Unified World Champion himself, Wrakk, and he decides to come out to the stage to address Michael and Ryan. "Looking at the two of you, it really does hit me how you really are a pair. So delusional, so sad, and most importantly, I've managed to wreck the both you in the past. You two want to whine about what you've lost? I lost a whole damn year. Don't try to trivialize that, ever! It's actually quite the conundrum. I can't tell if you were more pathetic as a group or now as individuals. But here's something you can all hang your hat on. I'm still Wrakk. I'm still the measuring stick. I'm still the man I was when I first came on to the scene. And as far as the two of you are concerned, we can all count on you guys to still be losers!"

Cue the music of Ziggy Styles and he comes out next to Wrakk with his usual stupid idiot expression on his face. He wants everyone to just take a breath because it's getting way too gloomy in here. "Michael, I am so happy that you want to take that next bold step in your career by facing me next week. Now I don't want you to go into the match thinking that there won't be an upside when you lose. The personal reflection that you will undergo afterwards will be tremendously healthy. You won't have to carry around the burdensome question of whether or not I'm better than you. And with revelation, comes healing. And with healing, comes transformation."

Wrakk interrupts Ziggy by asking him who the hell he thinks he is and tells him to take a hike. Ziggy tries to speak up in defense but Wrakk grabs him by the collar. Michael warns Wrakk not to do anything that might cause Ziggy to not make to next week. "Otherwise, I'll have to do something to you that'll keep you from making it to Bragging Rights, and Ryan won't get his chance at taking that title of yours."

Wrakk takes offense to this and declares that the two of them together still couldn't add up to him. Ryan dares Wrakk to try to test that hypothesis. Wrakk lets go of Ziggy and stares at the ring while pondering things over. "The two of you deserve each other. Keep thinking that things are going your way. I always enjoy a good laugh when things blow up in someone's face." Wrakk decides to leave things at that and heads to back, pointing menacingly at Ziggy as he does so.

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Backstage, Chris Collins and Xavier Cross feel like bragging about their recent success. Cross brings up the fact that Lisa Benton has made it official that he and Kyle Jacobs will be squaring off against each other at next week's SmackDown! Send-off. Cross hopes to send Kyle off to obscurity. This has been boiling for a long between Cross and Jacobs and it's time for finality. Is Kyle worthy of that last name of his? Is he destined for a prosperous future? Or will it be the same story as always? The story of Xavier Cross being the cornerstone of the WWE, of being the gatekeeper. Cross has been in a lot of battles, but credit to where it's due, none of them have been as annoying as this one with Kyle Jacobs. Cross understands Kyle wanting to finish things off the same way he started the year. Cross just isn't the doormat Kyle thinks he is. It's all OK, because Kyle can dust himself off afterwards and he is more than welcome to try his luck with some other sap.

Collins takes his turn and runs down Seth Von Kamp, his opponent for the Intercontinental Title at Bragging Rights. Seth had to have known that their paths would cross again someday. But Collins had imagined it with him being on top of the pack with Seth being the one nipping at his ankles. Collins isn't thrilled with the scenario as he is superior to Seth in virtually every measure you want to think of. The frustrations that Collins has experienced being sidetracked with so much nonsense are all going to come out at Bragging Rights. It sucks to be Seth Von Kamp, but those are the cards he got dealt. The house Seth has built for himself has been flimsy at best. It's time for a new chapter in the book of Chris Collins and he's going to write the opening statement in Seth's blood.

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MAIN EVENT: Adam Hail vs. Alexander Piero
Lisa Benton comes back onto the stage to remind everyone of the stakes here. Simon Bennett has set the time to beat and if Adam Hail can't do better, Simon Bennett is the one walking out of here with the present. If Adam is successful, then he gets the spoils. Bennett comes out to the stage to watch the match, obviously interested in the outcome. The match itself is a banger of a way to close the show. Piero is only going to improve as time goes on. Like I said before in another report, Piero needs to be rebuilt. Being able to hang tough with a vet like Hail is a good thing for him, I think, plus there's the matter of the present. So the match concludes with Hail getting more and more desperate to put the rookie away as time slips away. Hail looks like he's got Piero in position for the Hailstorm, but Piero recovers in time to nail Hail with a dropkick as Hail is perched on the top rope. Hail loses his balance and stumbles off the top and collapses onto the apron and down to the floor. The clock reaches Bennett's time and that's going to end the match in a draw. Simon Bennett gets the prize. Nathan Quinn is upset as he tries to get Hail back to his feet.

Lisa Benton makes it official and allows Bennett to claim his spoils. What the hell could be in that big box? We get our answer as Bennett lifts the thing and reveals a table loaded with all sort of implements. A chair. Brass knuckles. A pipe. A leather strap. A kendo stick. Lots of goodies. Bennett is confused, but Lisa explains that Simon has won the right to pick any one of the items before him and that item will be legal in his match against Adam Hail at Bragging Rights. Bennett gets a devilish grin on his face as he looks over his options. Hail and Quinn look on with concern. Ultimately, Bennett settles on the steel chain as he picks it up and points at Hail. Like that match needed to be even more out of control. Hail and Quinn are livid as we go off the air with Bennett holding the chain up. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Overall show rating: 87%

Loved the show structure of this episode. I like the idea of wrestlers being able to pick their own matches, their own stipulations etc sometimes.

Quentin trying to talk Orlando into a 4-on-1 match tickles me if only because I know such a match isn't even possible in EWR land. But I also like the idea of the delusional heel being unwilling to ever listen to the face even after clear rejection. Dude, he's just not that into you!

Hotbody in a ladder match is gonna make for some really good times. The best part of his run isn't just the promos but the fact that he keeps getting thrown into these blowoff gimmick matches and finding some way to bullshit his way through it every time. It's gold. I'm half expecting the Gavin to be ready to grab the belt only for Luscious or someone to climb the ladder on her man's behalf to get into a tug of war which, somehow, ends with the title falling on Hotbody's corpse for the win.

Ziggy Styles promos are fucking awesome too. That perfect type of annoying heel that even the other heels are like STFU.

Think the comments I'd drafted a week ago were more robust but ah well. Just wanted to make sure I said something.

I've got a bunch of shows "in the can" that I've booked and just need to write up, but this month has been pure chaos. Sadly barring a server turnaround I think my time here is coming to a close :(

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Were this a real show I would imagine getting pressure to do some kind of Christmas themed nonsense and I figured doing a night like this would help break up some of the monotony. Plus, it's a cheap way to get some of these Bragging Rights matches booked, the ladder match especially.

Doing 4-on-1 would be amazing. I don't like handicap matches, but I would allow it for an angle like this. First and foremost I would want Elimination Chamber. Needless to say, there's a different approach I'm taking with Kincaid. I feel like he's been really underutilized and what I've got in store for him should help reinvigorate him, if only for a bit. The end game is still getting around to doing Haven vs. Dark, but there's a lot I need to do to get there. I'm cooking up quite the fireworks factory.

Speaking of which, booking Hotbody the way I have has been a treat. Doing a ladder match should make for some more idiocy from him. Your idea for the finish would be hilarious, but I could absolutely envision the same finish from King of the Ring 1999 with the Magic Briefcase where someone lowers the belt all the fucking way down to the ground so that he doesn't have to climb. :lol:

I've got time coming up so I need to use it wisely and try to finish up December. The dread of the Rumble is coming up, too. I'm both looking and not looking forward to that ordeal.

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Superstars: December 20, 2040

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Hotbody has his crew with him as he wants to talk about what went down on Raw and the match that Gavin Jones wants to have with him at Bragging Rights.

"Now far be it from me to want to have a gripe with a proposed match as I am the most fighting-est Cruiserweight Champion in history, but I have to say that this ladder match that Gavin wants to have, well, it's just not going to work for me. Now, I am well aware of the horribly veiled threats to my person that Gavin made to me should I try to pull some kind of shenanigans to get out of this match. Look, no one is looking more forward to beating the snot out of Gavin Jones than I am, OK? I am watering at the mouth thinking about conquering another delusional opponent who thinks they're better than me! I WANT to face Gavin Jones! But, this is a bridge too far and it has nothing to do with any kind of tricks of any kind. My CRACK LEGAL TEAM Galino & Farnes is out here with me to explain the situation and how I cannot be penalized for refusing to partake in Gavin's silliness. What this is all about is something that I've kept to myself and is very difficult for me to confess in public. It's embarrassing and deeply personal and I know it may lower my image in the eyes of my multitude of fans across the world. It's something that I've kept from even my dear Luscious. But in light of what Gavin is asking for, I feel the need to bring it to light and I only pray that you, Luscious, don't think of me as less of a man because of it. This isn't easy for me, but it's necessary. The ladder match that Gavin demanded between himself and me can't happen because...I'm afraid of heights!" The crowd boos as Luscious looks shocked but sympathetic. The announcers express their doubts as Hotbody continues.

"No, it's true. It's something I've carried with me for practically my entire life. It's why I'm a champion conga dancer and not a skydiver or bungee jumper or pilot. I'm just a nervous, sweaty mess when I have to deal with heights, OK? Gavin, I know you earned your spot as number one contender and I know you had the right to name a stipulation, but those rights mean nothing if they are going to be discriminatory! I turn things over to Galino & Farnes to elaborate."

Freddie Galino takes the mic and continues from where Hotbody left off. "In this line of business, forcing someone into a situation where there is a clear disadvantage towards one party due to any physical or psychological ailments is unfair. What Gavin Jones and Lisa Benton have done is orchestrate a scenario in which our client cannot possibly win. The rights of our client take precedence as you wouldn't ask someone with a fear of blood to participate in a First Blood match. This is yet another gross abuse of authority excerised by Lisa Benton."

Jimmy Farnes takes over, following up on Galino's statement. "But fear not because Michael Hotbody is not without mercy. Gavin Jones and the WWE can avoid any unnecessary legal drama by simply calling off the match and have Gavin relinquish his status as number one contender to the WWE Cruiserweight Title, whereupon Michael Hotbody will find a suitable replacement, one who will not be so brazen in exploiting a severe handicap. This is the only fair and just and acceptable outcome, otherwise Lisa Benton will be facing some very real discrimination paperwork! We have the necessary documents lined up and ready so the threat is very real and if Gavin Jones had even slightest bit of humanity in him, he would make the moves to limit his liability!"

Speak of the devil and he'll appear as Gavin Jones has evidently heard enough and makes his way out to respond to all of this. He's wiping his brow in what appears to be frustration, but nonetheless he presses on. "Michael, I only just became the number one contender a few weeks ago and I'm already God damn sick of you. That's talent right there. You don't have a fear of heights, you have a fear of being a man. You have a fear of the ass kicking that's been long overdue. I warned you about what was coming to you if you tried to weasel your way out this. Unlike you, I don't view that belt as a toy to carry around with that trophy bitch you got. That belt, to me, means that you're the best at what you do, so having to watch you, day in and day out, walk around with it pisses me off to no end."

Michael interrupts Gavin with an incredulous tone. "Yeah, well, what the hell do you want to do about it? You're not going to get your match and I've got my entire crew here ready to back me up in wiping the floor with you! I should let you get in here and take your licks for daring to insult my precious Luscious! It's the least I could do for her being so understanding and supporting even after learning about my deepest, darkest secret. But I have a lot to process and consider after all of this so the best thing you can do, Gavin, is go walking back to Lisa Benton and have a good cry with each other. You have nobody to blame but yourself for this!"

Gavin stares at the site in the ring, but he appears undeterred by the entirety of Hotbody's crew. "That would be smart, but unlike you, Mikey, I actually have balls and I can actually back it up."

Gavin starts to make his way down to the ring but who should interrupt this turn of events but Miles Shawcross! He comes out to the stage bemoaning what he's seeing. He tells Gavin that sometimes things need to just be let go and that he's holding up the show with all of this self righteous horse crap. The people want to see a real top level cruiserweight and Miles Shawcross is all that and then some! In fact, he'll be happy to take Gavin down a peg or two by facing him tonight!

Michael Hotbody takes this opportunity to deflect from himself and calls out Gavin Jones, asking him if he's going to just stand there and take that from Miles. "Well, seeing as how Gavin isn't going to get any kind of match out of me and the fact that I'm willing to show a bit of mercy, I don't see why Gavin can't get his jollies by facing Miles Shawcross here tonight! We'll let you two hash things out. Gavin, hopefully when we next meet, it's under better circumstances and this ladder match nonsense is behind us!" And with that, Hotbody signals his crew that they should depart. They make their way through the crowd as Gavin and Miles exchange stares.

First Match: Mathias vs. Steve Hayes
Nothing really major here. Just some quality big man on big man action. I figure if Simon Bennett is going to be parked in the same camp as a guy like Mathias, then the dude should get some shine here and there. Anyways, Mathias gets a hard-fought win here, finishing Hayes off with a Goliath Gore for the pin. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Promo time as somewhere backstage Dusk is with her raven, Sorrow. Faith Connors is what's on their mind. Well, Dusk's mind, but I like to imagine she and the bird are simpatico. Anyways, what's she got to say about the Parkour Princess? "Can you sense it, Faith? Can you not feel it all around you? That shining spotlight under which you exist and thrive is slowly being engulfed by a vile, choking, all-consuming blackness. It eminates from me, Faith, and it has no compassion. I hope that in your mind you didn't truly believe you were always going to remain safe in that light forever. Light ultimately reaches two possible outcomes: it burns out...or it is extinguished."

Elsewhere backstage, Cameron Harper is pacing in the dressing area when Ethan Lang walks in. Lang has a rather disapproving expression on his face as he confronts Harper. Harper is quick to be defensive as he addresses Lang. "OK, look, I know why you're upset. Believe me, I'd be just as upset if the situation was reversed. I blew it on Raw, and I'm sorry, OK?"

"Blowing it is a bit of an understatement, Cameron," Lang counters. "It wasn't that you made a simple mistake or that you got out-wrestled by someone better than you. You just flat out ignored Jake Connelly and what he was trying to do for you on Monday in that match! The same Jake Connelly you made such a stink about wanting to learn from and have as your manager! And you missed out on that contract. Think of what you could've done with that, man!"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it, Ethan," Cameron continues. "I'm well aware now of how badly I screwed the pooch. Believe me, I've spent a lot of hours thinking over the matches I could've booked for myself."

"Wait, for yourself? You could've used that contract to give the two of us a shot at the Tag Team Championship."

"Oh, right, right, of course. Of course I was absolutely thinking about the two of us!" Cameron assures Ethan. "Of course, if you really think about it, it would've been MY choice since it would've been ME doing all the work in winning the match so I'm not sure where you would fit in to all of it...."

Jake Connelly comes in to interrupt this exchange that looks like it's getting more tense as Ethan looks offended at what Cameron said. Connelly tries to calm things down. "Hey, hey, let's not go all out of control sniping at each other here, OK? Ethan, you don't need to browbeat Cameron. He made a mistake, this is a learning opportunity. That's why we accepted him into the fold, right, because he wanted to learn?" Ethan inhales deeply and lets it out as he begrudgingly agrees with Connelly. Connelly continues, however. "Now with that being said, Cameron, I take it that you're going to listen to me from here on out, right? Opportunities like the one on Raw don't come around often and they need to be snatched up when you can. The two of you are capable of great things, I know it. But it's not going to happen if there isn't a united dedication. The sky is the limit, guys. So tonight, let's get on the same page. What happened on Monday, we're just going to set it aside. We're going to build on that. We're going to make so much noise that opportunity will be breaking down our doors. Emilio London and Doyle Hughes, the Wolves of Wall Street, they haven't seen a pack like this before. Let's do this, alright?" And with that, Ethan and Cameron look at each other, give a nod and bump fists. Looks like things are back in order on this end.

Second Match: Southern Gentlemen vs. The Wyldhearts
Madison gets on the mic and announces that Lisa Benton has made it official that her boys, the Unified Tag Team Champions The Wyldhearts, will be defending the title against the former champions The Royal Effect next week on the SmackDown! Send-Off. Blaine and Robbie have been looking forward to that match just as much as Kavovit and McKay have because it's a chance to show the Royal Effect how it wasn't a fluke when her boys took the belts the first time around. The Wyldhearts are more than just a couple of pretty faces, and it looks like Kavovit and McKay have been getting too wrapped up in their own hype to remember that fact. "You can't call yourselves the Best Tag Team if you're not wearing these belts. We'll be waiting for you next week." To say this match is fire is underselling it quite a bit. A far cry from that first match, this is a great display of technique and high-flying goodness. The champs look to finish things cleanly here as Murdoch gets back body dropped over the top rope to the outside by Bellamey. Brody Lee moves in to try to clothesline Bellamey but the latter ducks. Greer comes back in and joins Bellamey and Lee turns around from his missed opportunity and eats the Heartstopper from the champions to give them the win. It's celebration time as the Wyldhearts hold up their belts in victory, but in true heel tag team fashion, the Royal Effect come sneaking in from behind to lay them out. Things are getting uglier and uglier between these two teams. *****, 95% overall.

Third Match: Gavin Jones vs. Miles Shawcross
Michael Hotbody plants himself at ringside to provide commentary and his expert insight on Gavin Jones. This match is all goodness all around. I figure giving Gavin a lot of strong outings helps in Hotbody putting out a strong aura of fear so that the audience buys Gavin having a good shot at dethroning him at Bragging Rights. Hotbody continues to reiterate his point about not going through with a ladder match as the match goes on. He's not going to walk into a situation where he's at an obvious disadvantage. It's discrimination at its worst and Gavin should feel ashamed of himself for even bringing it up! Anyways, Shawcross and Gavin slug it out on the top rope as Gavin tries escaping an attempt at a superplex from Shawcross. Hotbody declares that he's a nervous wreck just looking at this and that he'd be sweating Crisco if had to be at that height. Jones eventualy wins the exchange by landing a massive European uppercut on Shawcross that sends the latter flying back into the ring in perfect position for Jones to come off with the Frog Splash and get the win by pinfall. Jones then proceeds to stare a hole through Hotbody, for all the good it does him as Zed stands in the way of anything Gavin might be thinking about. How is this situation going to get resolved? *****, 95% overall.

Fourth Match: The Wolves of Wall Street vs. Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper
Well, let's see if that backstage pow-wow meant anything. Harper comes across as more reserved here, not going off half-cocked like in previous outings. I feel bad having a perfectly fine team in the Wolves that I can utilize as major players, but I'm sticking them out here to further an angle. Oh, well, it's not like the match sucks or anything. It breaks down at the end with all four men battling it out. Lang sends London to the outside through the middle rope. He goes down to one knee to get his breath with his back turned. Meanwhile, Hughes sets himself up as he looks like he's going to charge Lang. Lang starts to get back up and Hughes pounces by going for a big boot but Harper shoves Lang out of the way and ends up eating the kick instead. Hughes is confused as he looks down on Harper's body and Lang capitalizes by doing that twisty Booker T sunset flip thing on Hughes to get the roll up and the pin. Connelly and Lang check on Harper, but he's fine and Connelly looks proud as it looks like everyone is operating like one. ****1/2, 93% overall.

More backstage interview goodness as Paul Andrews is with Simon Bennett. Bennett gets asked why he picked the chain on Monday to be legal in his match against Adam Hail at Bragging Rights from all of the available choices. Bennett says that it wasn't an easy choice. "I stood there on that stage on Monday looking at all the options. Each time I looked at an object, my mind would race with creativity, thinking about what would bring me the most joy when I used it on Adam. What was going to put the biggest smile on my face as I put it to good use in beating the smugness out of his ass. The chain, though, caught my eye for one major reason. It's symbolic. A chain is all about connection, linking things together. Well, Adam had a link with me. We forged a chain together. A then he decided to throw it all away. He decided to break that chain. Well, congratulations for that, Adam, because now it's come full circle and I'm going to enjoy using that chain to bring karma right to your doorstep. And with each choke, with each whip, and with each fist you experience, I hope the thing that runs through your mind is the question of what the hell you were thinking in ever turning your back on me! The chain that you so callously discarded is going to be the thing that comes back around and wrecks you at Bragging Rights!"

Fifth Match: The Future Foundation and Vivian Merrick vs. The Academy and...Cordelia Capriati???
Wait a second. On Monday, Cordelia looked like she finally had enough of Brooke and her attitude. What is she doing here now? Sophie Waters gets on the mic and explains the situation. "Let me set the stage for everyone, especially Brooke, who is no doubt throwing a tantrum and pulling her hair out as she watches this. Much like Randy Ellis and Justin Mitchell before her, Cordelia was fortunate enough to stumble into a revelation. And that revelation was a simple one, one that I even had way back when. And that is the fact that Brooke is such a bitch. A snobby, screeching, stuck up, know-it-all little bitch to be more precise. Her loss is my gain, though, as I can actually appreciate these three outstanding talents. But don't worry, Brooke. I know you had high hopes for them. So take comfort in knowing that I'll be helping them along the way in reaching those high hopes." Well, how about that for a wrinkle? Sophie's words prove prophetic as her crew looks like they've got things well in hand here. It shouldn't be a surprise, as they operated as a unit before, just under different circumstances. Anyways, it boils down to Vivian and Cordelia as the legal participants. Vivian reverses an Irish whip from Cordelia, sending her into the corner. Vivian tries following up with a charge, but she eats knees from Cordelia. That sends Vivian reeling backwards, dazed and hurting and Cordelia strikes while the iron is hot, coming off the turnbuckle to nail Vivian with the Crowning Achievement to score the pin. How is all of this going to affect Brooke and what remains of her crew? ****1/2, 91% overall.

Sixth Match: Orlando Kincaid vs. Josh Turmell
Quinten McDaniels comes down to join the announce team for commentary as we're told that so far nobody has heard anything about what Kincaid plans to do with the contract that he won on Monday. Quinten says that it's a good thing and that it's a sign that maybe, just maybe, Orlando is coming around to what Quinten, Chet, and Hugo have been asking from him. Orlando has a history with Quinten and Chet, and it's not something so easily forgotten, but perhaps Orlando just needs a few reminders. The match goes on smoothly as Quinten observes and regales us all with stories of his time with Orlando. Orlando looks laser focused here. The calm can't last forever, though, as Josh ends up stumbling to the outside in front of the announce table. Quinten sees this as an opportunity to lend a hand and he gets up and goes over to Josh. Orlando yells at Quinten to back the hell off. Quinten looks shocked and incredulous and tries pleading his case again. Orlando isn't hearing it, though, and he heads out to grab Josh himself and sends him back into the ring. Quinten and Orlando exchange words as Orlando threatens Quinten again. Quinten turns back around to go back to the announce table, but Josh baseball slides into Orlando, sending him into Quinten. Josh brings Orlando back into the ring and he goes up, looking to land a crossbody block, but Orlando rolls through with it and ends up on top and scores the pin. Orlando celebrates, but here comes Quinten to ruin things as he slides in behind Orlando and nails him, sending him to the mat. Quinten yells at the fallen Orlando and pulls him up only to send him to the outside. Quinten looks disappointed and conflicted, but ultimately he decides to send Orlando into the steps. Quinten decides that an exclamation point needs to be added so he picks up part of the steps and nails Orlando in the face with it when he tries getting up. If Orlando hadn't wanted to be a part of whatever Quinten was offering, I doubt it's happening now. ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Haven vs. Hugo
I started with big man on big man, it feels right to end the show the same way. This is the kind of match I feel I can get away with putting on a show like Superstars as the main event. The real money match I would imagine people wanting to pay to see is the eventual Haven vs. Victor Dark showdown. As you'd expect, this is a power match, helped by Haven's overness and more athletic prowess. Hugo just monsters his way through this, and it's an odd sight seeing Haven as a vulnerable underdog, but here we are. That Victor Dark is such a weasel. A cunning weasel, though. Haven starts a comeback after surprisingly nailing a Stun Gun on Hugo, disorienting the big man. It comes to an end when Haven looks to hit the Sting of Solace, but Hugo escapes and back body drops Haven to the outside. Chet Morris comes over and taunts Haven while the latter is on his knees, but Haven responds by grabbing Chet by the throat as he gets up. Hugo goes out to continue the match and breaks up the grasp Haven has on Chet. Haven shoves Hugo away, but that leaves him open to Chet just kicking him in the balls to draw the DQ. Things looks bad for Haven in this 2-on-1 scenario but fortunately Eddy Clash comes running down, chair in hand to help chase away the heels. Quinten McDaniels comes down to withdraw his crew as we're left to ponder just how Eddy Clash and Haven are going to fight this battle fairly when it's just the two of them? ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

As always, the Hotbody stuff is gold. Crackhead lawyers trying to get him out of the match because of his fear of heights :lol:

I would like a 75 year old R-Truth to walk out and hype up his upcoming match with Hotbody and everyone's like WTF you're not in the match and he's like "Oh, sorry. My bad".

51
 

SmackDown!: December 21, 2040

OPENING TWENTY-MINUTE PROMO OF DOOM TIME as the Stable That Isn't A Stable comes out to join us. It's more of an alliance of convenience. Anyways, Quinten McDaniels, Hugo, and Chet Morris come on down to express their grievances. Quinten takes the mic and proceeds to bare his soul. "It can be quite disheartening when you set out to make things better for yourself in life and barrier after barrier after barrier keeps coming up to disuade you. Look no further than the noble intentions of the three of us and then try to say that we aren't being tested. Haven is still up and about and filled with more righteous indignation than ever. Eddy Clash, in what is becoming the story of his WWE career, doesn't know how to keep his nose out of other people's business. And last, but certainly not least, the personification of the dagger through the heart known as Orlando Kincaid. You all witnessed the events that led up to last night so you can't call any one of us three a liar when we say that Kincaid did it all to himself."

Chet takes the mic and continues. "It wasn't that long ago that the three of us stood with Orlando in this ring before you all and let him know how welcome he was in our fold. But he thought he knew better. He thought he had everything all figured out. Orlando, credit where it's due, you did continue your trend of choosing the wrong path. So neither or Hugo hold it against Quinten for what he did to you last night. You can't expect to get off free when you bite the hand that's extended towards you. No barrier is going to stand in the way of the three of us purging our souls of failures."

Hugo takes his turn with the mic and address Haven. "Haven, I'm not through with you by a longshot. A great truth was revealed to me during our encounter last night, and that's the fact that when I looked you in the eye as I was pounding away at your carcass, you are no idol. You are no leader. You are no savior. I hate frauds. But Haven, you saw it and you damn sure felt it. You know that I'm no fraud. You know that I can break you. And it doesn't matter who is standing by your side. In fact, I demand justice for being cheated last night!"

Quinten takes back the mic and declares that he's in agreement with Hugo. "There's no reason that all of this can't be settled right now. Eddy and Haven, come and take your medicine! The quicker you face your fate, the better it is for everyone. And Orlando, if you're watching, know that what ends up happening to these two is the same thing we have in store for you."

The music of Eddy Clash hits and Big Thunder himself comes out to the stage, looking pissed. He's got a mic and wants to respond to all of this. "You know, if I can address something you brought up earlier, I actually was minding my own business for a good while. I remember it like it was yesterday. There I was at Survivor Series, beating the snot out of the Superstar of the Year, when this lunatic comes out of nowhere and ruined my night. Then that same lunatic surrounds himself with two other nutcases. So now I've got myself a problem. See, I really, really, REALLY want to wrap my hands around the neck of that original lunatic, but to do that, I've got to deal with the other ones. Well, I'm nothing if not a go-getter and a problem solver, so while I can't speak for Haven, I'm not about to turn down a chance like this."

With that, Eddy drops the mic and starts making his way down to the ring. Is he seriously going to do this with a 3-on-1 disadvantage? Regardless, he easily trucks Quinten and Chet thanks to his size and starts slugging it out with Hugo. Hugo doesn't go down as easy and it's only a matter of time before the tables are turned on Eddy, made even worse by Quinten and Chet making their way back into the fight, clipping Eddy's knee and bringing him down. Things look bad BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT!!! Oh, shit, things are picking up. Indeed Haven is in the ring when the lights return and he's a house on fire! Down goes Quinten! Down goes Chet! Down goes Quinten again! Eddy gets back into it and Quinten and Chet are disposed. Haven and Eddy look like they're going to survive this but Hugo makes his comeback and just trucks the two faces. He gets them both by the throat and it looks bad BUT WTF IS THIS?!??!??! IT'S ORLANDO KINCAID!!! Orlando just came in out of nowhere behind Hugo AND HE'S GOT SOME HARDWARE! Steel chair hardware to be exact. He unloads on Hugo repeatedly, enough to break the grip he had on Eddy and Haven and to bring him down on all fours. Chet tries his hand at it but gets a chair to the gut for his trouble and gets sent to the outside by Haven. Orlando goes after Quinten, but Quinten isn't feeling that tonight and he retreats, calling for his comrades to call it a night. It's a 3-on-3 staredown as Orlando has added a new wrinkle to all of this.

Backstage, Brooke is with Salvatore Scabbia and Ronnie Costello, none of whom are looking happy about what's been going down between them and the Academy and now Cordelia Capriati. Brooke calls her former clients ingrates. Unintelligent ingrates, even. Leaving her fold is one thing. She can even understand going off and finding a new manager. But to go so far as to challenge her is a bridge too far. Brooke isn't hurting for talent in the slightest, but if Sophie Waters wants to make it seem otherwise, they can settle a few questions at Bragging Rights. Brooke will bring Carmella, Ronnie, and Salvatore and Sophie can bring those outcasts she's so proud of. It's time they all learned the hard way what a stupid decision it was to ever leave Brooke.

First Match: Neil Quint vs. L.A. Xander
Making Quint stand out and look good is certainly not an indication of something in store for him fairly soon, right? L.A.X. isn't even a cruiserweight, but I figure the wins need to continue somehow, so fuck it. We get a sweet outing here from these two, all of which is leading up to the streak continuing. Neil gets the pinfall win here after hitting the Quint-Essential Top Rope Maneuver. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Second Match: The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody, Zed Jones, and Galino & Farnes vs. The Wasteland, Isaac Wolff, and El Silencio
Hotbody gets on the stick as he wants to give us an update on the issue of the proposed ladder match. "The WWE is taking the issue I brought up last night VERY SERIOUSLY! Their legal department knows that a case of discrimination this severe and this blatant would be a huge black eye to the company's public image. This is nothing but good news because now it seems like some fair treatment for their Cruiserweight Champion is in order! I understand that the cancellation of this match is a huge letdown for all of my fans, but you will come to realize that it was all for the best! I am a wrestling champion, for sure, but I am also a champion for civil liberties! And in that epic struggle, there is always one winner which prevails, and that is justice! Yes, true justice, and Gavin Jones will come to realize that being on the right side of justice is way more important than any title!"

Well, with all that said, let's get this match underway. This is more about letting Zed get some shine, along with letting Hotbody go completely ridiculous with his supposed fear of heights, notably a spot where he's got Wolff down and he tries climbing to the top only to "freak out" and go to the middle rope where he also "freaks out", finally settling on "coming off" the bottom rope with a forearm. He hyperventilates a bit, while his crew shows concern, but he assures them he's OK. The match comes to an end when it's down to Drakken and Hotbody. The ref is busy trying to get some order with the other participants. Hotbody tries crawling away from Drakken, making his way towards Luscious on the outside. Drakken grabs his leg, trying to pull Hotbody off the rope. Luscious slips Hotbody her Slammy and he lets go of the rope as Drakken continues pulling, causing Hotbody to go towards Drakken with the Slammy just happening to collide with Drakken's skull. Oh, dear, what a horrible accident. Hotbody tosses the Slammy back to Luscious, as she no doubt misses it, and the ref turns around to count the pin for Hotbody. ****1/2, 91% overall.

More backstage interview time as we go to Nathan Quinn and his client, Adam Hail. Adam gets asked if there is any concern over the choice of stipulation that Simon Bennett made for their match at Bragging Rights. Adam says Simon could've picked a God damn Abrams tank and it wouldn't have mattered. "All Simon did was pick out the thing that I'm going to bludgeon his face with. He wants the chain? He's got enough to hang himself. Cutting my ties with him ultimately came down to the fact that I have always been and will always be better than Simon Bennett, and I refuse to be anchored to dead weight like that. Bragging Rights is where I'm finally free of this nonsense!"

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as the Parkour Princess, Faith Connors comes out to join us. She's got Dusk on her mind and wants to share some thoughts with us about that. "One of things that I still get asked about is how I'm able to dive into whatever I'm doing without fear. And I always respond the same way: don't be mistaken, the fear is always there. It's just a matter of how strong you are to overcome it. It's being able to have the feeling that what you're doing is going to pay off when you challenge that fear. And quite frankly that adrenaline rush I get when I've conquered whatever's in my way is like no other. So it shouldn't come as a surprise that when I get confronted by some chick talking about darkness and gloom and misery that I end up getting a little bored. Dusk, you're new here so I'll be somewhat gentle. I survived the onslaught of one of the toughest women ever to grace this ring to win the first ever Queen of the Ring. I upset the monster known as Sonya Braddock to capture the Women's Title just one year into my career here. I won the first ever Women's Money in the Bank. And I stood side-by-side with my sister-in-arms Jenna Kyle to make history by winning the Women's Tag Team Titles for the first time ever. So if you're thinking that you something in your bag of tricks that can ever rattle me or kill the high that I got in all of those moments, you're not just naive, you're delusional. Now under normal circumstances I'd just dismiss you, but a chair to the face is the kind of thing that sticks with me. I've got no issue with settling things if someone wants to come in here and be the big dog in the yard, and if that's how you want go about it, I'm more than ready to match you hit-for-hit. That is, unless, you're nothing but talk."

That's the cue for Dusk's music to hit and the Doll of Darkness herself makes her way out with Sorrow in tow. How are you liking these monikers I've been dropping for some of these people? Anyway, Dusk has a rebuttal for sure and she lets Faith know how she feels about what was just said. "Poor, poor Faith. It's quite the sight to see you flailing about, searching for meaning. But what else is left for you to do when you're being swallowed by the abyss? You can certainly scream, but that's just as futile because I won't hear it. You think yourself special because of your supposed form of 'fearlessness'? You think yourself above it all because you walk the mirror's edge, that thin line that separates the unreal from the truth? The only thing that makes you is alone. And with loneliness comes despair."

"You really know how to say a whole lot of nothing," Faith counters. "Critique me all you want, but one thing you can always count on is that I'm up-in-your-face direct about everything. And I'm not alone and I never have been. I've had people like this family over here. I've had people like this couple. I've had people like that group up there with the banner. All these people you see here raising their red gloves, they've been with me. The people at home watching right now. They've all been with me, loving every moment, from every big chance I ever took and every time I made some loudmouth eat my knee. So I'm willing to bet that they'll be with me all the way when I do the same thing to you. Which bring me back to my original point: are you going to bring some action with all of that talk or are you just going to stand around with your bird like some scarecrow?"

"You don't make demands of me," Dusk replies. "I am not beholden to your whims or any of your mindless followers. But if they want to be by your side, then let them be overtaken by the darkness, too. Next week seems appropriate, don't you think? If we're going to call it a send-off, then it only makes sense if you get a farewell." And with that Dusk takes her leave as next week's SmackDown! Send-off looks like it's getting even more packed.

Third Match: Clubber Harris vs. Romeo Valiente
There are times when I wonder why I even have Romeo still on the roster and then I remember it's for situations like this. Clubber Harris gets on the mic and announces his match against Zed Jones next week on SmackDown! Send-off. "Now I know Zed thinks he's got something in the badass department, but he needs to understand that I'm the damn boss of that section. Zed you got the tools physically. You're big, you're tough, you're strong. But what do you got right here, in your gut? Right here, in your heart? Right here, in your head? We're all going to find out together next week, only you're going to be finding out the hard way. You're running with a crew of people too big for their britches and you're going to learn you're no different. Muscle up and man up the best you can, Zed, because you're overdue one hell of a lesson!" So this is a sweet big man vs. little man outing. We've got to do what we can to get people looking forward to next week. Harris naturally has to go over here and so he does by hitting Romeo with the Club Pain to pick up the pin. *****, 94% overall.

Fourth Match: Kerry Cemenko vs. Vinnie LaPaige
Hey, it's round two of Matches For The Purpose of Putting a Dude Over. Brandon Reigns takes an interest here as he decides to watch from the stage as he and Cemenko have a date at Bragging Rights. It's another solid outing as Kerry looks good, trading glaces with Reigns throughout. Ultimately, Kerry gets the duke by hitting the Curb Stomp on Vinnie to score the win. We go to break as Kerry and Brandon shout some words at each other. ****1/2, 88% overall.

Fifth Match: King Kavovit vs. Robbie Greer
A little preview ahead of the Tag Team Title match scheduled for next week. Neither man has their respective partners out with them as it's going to be a true one-on-one affair. An awesome one-on-one affair as the rating demonstrates. A good sign for next week, unless the game wants to be a dick about things. Anyways, the end comes when Kavovit reverses an Irish Whip but Robbie rebounds off the ropes with an attempted crossbody. Kavovit ducks and Robbie hits the ref. He goes down and Robbie shows some concern. Kavovit takes advantage and grabs Robbie from behind, looking to dump him over the top. Robbie reverses and Kavovit ends up on the apron. A dropkick from Robbie puts Kavovit down on the floor and that gives Robbie a chance to try to revive the ref. The ref looks like he's coming to so Robbie turns his attention back to Kavovit. He reaches through the ropes and tries to pull Kavovit up, but Kavovit pops up and nails Robbie with his Tag Team of the Year Slammy in the side of his head. Kavovit gets back in and a dazed Robbie is open to an Oklahoma Roll from Kavovit and that's going to be enough to give him the cheap win. *****, 96% overall.

To the back we go again as Kyle Jacobs has some things to get off his chest. He's looking forward to next week's SmackDown! Send-off where he's hoping to send off Xavier Cross to obscurity. He talks about breaking into the business and all of the advice and talks he got from his father and uncle. They told him that he was a special case because the hardest thing he was going to ever have to endure was not the training, not the abuse, and not any kind of loss. The hardest thing he was going to have to overcome was the doubt and the reluctance of the people and his peers to accept him because of the simple nature of his last name. There was going to be resentment and scrutiny and they were right. But Kyle feels like he's past that and is ready to reach new heights. All that needs to be done is break through that barrier named Xavier Cross. "Cross, I've earned my place here, same as you. What happens next week was inevitable."

MAIN EVENT: Ryan Pattillo vs. Chris Collins
So we've got the two challengers for the two main singles titles at Bragging Rights going at it here. Collins brings up how this is a bit of a reignition of what went the two of them went through earlier this year, and much like how things are reigniting between him and Seth Von Kamp, the end result is going to be same: Chris Collins coming out victorious as the winner that he is. His father didn't do much for him as a person, but he passed on the necessary attributes to be the best in this business. Circumstances may change, but talent is talent and the proof will be presented to you come Bragging Rights! So this is a rocking main event as these guys have awesome chemistry. We can't really let either guy job here, though, so unfortunately we're going to have to go the double countout route as the two brawl on the outside. Things continue to break down afterwards, but luckily the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk looks like he's going to break things up, namely by attacking Ryan Pattillo. Wrakk tries charging at his challenger, but Ryan ducks in time and Wrakk nails Collins. Ryan looks to get one over on Wrakk and proceeds to nail a Shutdown on him to send a message. We close the show with Pattillo standing tall. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 91%

Another solid show with some logical storybuilding. Kincaid inevitably being drafted in to make it 3 on 3 against the "Dark Order" is good shit and I imagine it would've gotten a huge pop. Simple but effective.

Lots of names on here I don't see around too much. Very easy to forget you have a gigantic roster of talented guys that mostly hang out in catering if only because there's only so many programs to go around at once. Wasteland, Wolff, and Silencio feels like a super fun mismatch team that served the purpose of putting over the Hotbody Family.

I just know Dusk is a super hot goth chick. Me likey.

24
 

Raw: December 24, 2040

It's Christmas Eve!!! Let's see how our lovely roster celebrates tonight! Oh, and there's a PPV this Sunday, too. Our main event has been dubbed a Champion Showcase as the WWE Unified World, WWE Intercontinental, and WWE Unified Tag Team champions are all going to be involved. Let's get to it.

OPENING TWENTY-MINUTE PROMO OF DOOM TIME!!! Damn it, we just did this on SmackDown!. Anyways, this time it's Orlando Kincaid who wants to start us off with some griping. It looks like he's got some strong fan support. This turn of events might open up some new avenues for him. Anyway, Quinten McDaniels and the rest of his crew are going to be the target for his venom. "You know, before what went down a few days ago, I was on track to having a pretty damn good Christmas. Now, instead sipping cocoa peacefully by the fire I'm going to be spending the time thinking about pounding the hell out of a certain group of guys. This isn't the three wise men, it's a trio of the dumbest sons of bitches you've ever laid your eyes on. My feelings on these guys are the same as they were a couple of weeks ago when they were in this ring, sticking their hands out and trying to bring me into their little camp. You see, Quinten, I can recall a time not too long ago when we had the opportunity to stick together, but you felt that you had outgrown me. The whole collapse of the Order was your ticket to doing things your own way. Now I'm not going to stand here and claim that it didn't sting, but it did open a door for me, too. So just like you didn't need or want me then, I don't need or want you right now. But you couldn't just drop it, could you? You had to go and pull what you pulled on Superstars. Well, 'tis the season for giving and I'm in the giving mood, so Quinten, why don't you bring your ass out here right now so you can get what's coming to you and so that I can finish what I started on SmackDown!."

Sure enough, Quinten McDaniels eventually makes his way out looking none too pleased. He's ready to rip into Orlando as he stands on the stage. "Orlando, I was willing to be humble and merciful when I realized that what happened on Superstars was an accident. But then you once again decided to be rash and self-destructive when you decided to cross us on SmackDown!. You showed your true colors by choosing to stand with the man who has been the bane of the existence of so many people's lives. You want to cast your lot with him, then you'll suffer the same fate!"

"This isn't about Haven or any of this whack job therapy crap you're on. This is about you pissing me off! And since you've got yourself a crew that's willing to stand by you, they can get my boot up their asses, too. You see, I finally decided how I'm going to use my contract that I won last week. I want to take on all three of you! Now, you and everyone else watching might think that's a tad crazy to go forward with this, 3-on-1. So I'm going to add this wrinkle to it. I'm fine going it solo, but I'm thinking that there are two other people who would want a piece of the action, men who you are so keen on destroying. So if they're open to it, at Bragging Rights, Haven and Eddy Clash, this is their invitation to the party. And there's no egg nog or cider, no presents or reindeer, and definitely no jolly fat guy. It's going to be the fight that you asked for, NO TAKEBACKS!" And with that, Orlando drops the mic to the cheer of the crowd as Quinten looks on with a serious glare.

First Match: Jesse Capalbo vs. Doug Michaels
I'm mainly doing this to get Capalbo back into the mix and to get Doug's gimmick to finally change. There are some other people who need the same thing, but I can only do so much on a show. Also, I imagine with it being holiday time, some of my top guys would want to be off the road and at home. Cruiserweight action is also always a welcome addition. There may a gimmick change in order here, but it's not going to be Doug's night as Capalbo dropkicks Doug as he comes of the top with some sort of offensive attack and that opens him up to being locked in Capalbo's Spitfire to give him the submission win. Another person Hotbody or Gavin needs to worry about? ****1/2, 88% overall.

Second Match: Salvatore Scabbia vs. Justin Mitchell
Brooke gets on the mic and announces that on the pre-show for Bragging Rights her team of Scabbia and Ronnie & Carmella Costello are going to be facing Sophie's team of her former clients, The Academy and Cordelia Capriati. "And isn't just a perfect little snapshot of the kind of person Sophie Waters is and always has been. She's been nothing but a poor soul struggling to grow in the shadow of people better than her, specifically ME! I have always been smarter. I have always been more talented. I have always been more accomplished than she could ever hope to be, and now, even at this stage in my career she has to find a way to jump on my scraps and find a way to be relevant off of them. Let tonight be a sharp stinging jab, Sophie, to remind you of your place and to prepare you for what's in store. And to you ungrateful children who couldn't measure up, regret doesn't even begin to describe what you're going to experience!" So this is all about giving a peek at that aforementioned 6-person match for this Sunday. It may seem like an odd detour for a guy like Scabbia who was in a great position on the card not too long ago, but I feel like this is a good way to keep him occupied and an interesting story to tell for all parties involved. Again, it's about more avenues that everyone involved can take that wouldn't have happened otherwise. Plus, it's not like I'm going to let Scabbia just become some scrub. Case in point, Mitchell looks to climb to the top, but as he's perched Brooke hops on the apron to give him a mouthful to distract him. Scabbia sees the opening he needs and press slams Mitchell from his position and he follows it up by locking in the Omerta. Justin, to his credit, doesn't submit but the ref determines he can't continue as he starts to pass out and calls for the bell. Brooke's words may very well be prophetic. ****1/2, 89% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as the number one contender to the Women's Title, Jenna Kyle, comes out to join us. "Happy Holidays to everyone, first and foremost. Hopefully tonight and tomorrow morning turn out to be everything you're wishing for. Everyone is thinking about what gifts they'll be getting for the season and I'm no different. And while I may have to wait a little bit longer than most, I'm still planning on enjoying my present and that's the WWE Women's Championship. Now at the home of my family we do the upside-down tree thing, and yeah, go on, make your jokes about Australia and upside-down and all that, but it's so appropriate as it's been nothing but a topsy-turvy world for me this last year. From WrestleMania to SummerSlam and now Bragging Rights, never let it be said that life can't throw you curves, and that's what's coming for Sonya Braddock this Sunday. She spoke a good game a while back when we were face to face, but I know she's been at home training. She's been hard at work getting herself in top form, and I know this because she can't afford not to. She can't afford to take this Sunday for granted. She knows that she'll lose a lot of face if it's not backed up. Imagine the aftermath she'd have to contend with if the headlines read 'Woman of the Year Sonya Braddock Loses Championship'. So she's taking this extremely seriously, don't you doubt that, and I expect nothing less. I'm ready to make history one more time this year, Sonya. So with all due respect, enjoy your happy Christmas, because it's going to be a rotten New Year's."

Ordinarily, this would be the end of the matter, but it looks like someone's got the urge to add some more on top of this segment. That person being the Doll of Darkness herself, Dusk! She has Sorrow with her along for the ride, and needless to say neither one of them is decked out for the holidays. They join Jenna in the ring and get face-to-face with her. Obviously Dusk is going to do the talking...although I wouldn't put it past present day WWE to give the raven a voice. "All this cheer, all this joy, all this celebration...it's making me want to puke."

"Listen, Morticia, if you're going to be out here to ruin the mood and hate on the holidays, we're going to have a problem."

"You already have one. You know, I could never stand people like your friend, Faith. So full of herself that she thinks it's game to laugh in the face of the abyss. I could never stand people like your opponent for this Sunday. Accolades constantly heaped upon her despite the bare minimum. And most importantly, I could never stand people like you. Two-faced...conventionally pretty...a poster girl of who we're supposed to be. The blonde Barbie doll of "perfection" But the upside to it all is that I have the power to break all of you. The power to reduce you to ruin."

"You have to the power to reduce us to sleep. You see what people like you don't get is that I knew that I'd have a hard time being taken seriously, so I didn't worry about my looks. I made sure to work my ass off towards being the best I can be in this ring so that when some supposed "hard knocks" character like yourself came knocking, I'd have no fear because I'd know that I could handle them. Both you and Sonya are making a mistake thinking that I'm some fragile piece of porcelain. I grew up in Australia. Where'd you come from, the suburbs? What makes you so hard, Daddy forgot your Sweet 16? Mum didn't get you the fancy sports car? At least with Sonya Braddock, I know where she's coming from and I get how she can command such credibility. You? Sorry, mate, but I'm going to need more than words."

"You want actions then? Very well. But don't complain when you don't like what you see. Watch what I do to your companion this Friday and should you emerge victorious on Sunday, I hope the image of Faith's broken body is emblazoned in your mind, reminding you of what's to come. What you asked for."

"You don't need to worry about Sunday. I'll be taking that belt for sure. As far as Faith goes, she's never needed me to fight her battles or stick up for her with words, but I will say this. If you're going to underestimate her the same way you're doing to me, you're going to want to crawl back into that hole you came from and never show your face again." And with that, Jenna drops her mic and rolls out of the ring, apparently done for the night, leaving Dusk to ponder things over. We're actually not done with her tonight as she's got a match later. We'll see how that goes.

Third Match: The Love Connection vs. The Future Foundation
It's tag team goodness! Aphrodite and Vivian, of course, provide extra entertainment with their out-of-the-ring shenanigans. I'm looking to inject these guys into a four-way for the tag belts down the line. The Future Foundation would certainly love to get back on top of the ranks considering how dominant they were during the year. Anyways, it's down to Greene and Julian as the legal men. Greene has Julian set up for the Greene With Envy, but Vivian pushes him off the top. Julian manages to catch Greene as he comes down and rolls through trapping Greene in a small package and that's going to give the heels the cheap pin fall win. *****, 94% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Wait a minute...Hotbody isn't coming out. It's Gavin Jones making his way to the set in the ring and he takes the mic declaring himself the host for tonight's edition of the Hot Button. "Actually, that name kind of sucks. I'm thinking we change it to something a bit more Gavin-esque. How about the Play Pen? That sounds good, right? Anyway, as your host I think we can make some other changes. This podium? Looks pretty ugly if you ask me. Plus, it's kind of cheap. I think we can safely say goodbye to it." Gavin picks up the podium and chucks it out of the ring. "Now, what other changes can we make? Oh, I've got a good one! How about we get ourselves a new Cruiserweight Champion?!? That sounds like a great idea. In fact, that's been long overdue. Well, not to worry, I've got the power to take care of that, too!"

This is going to be the part where there's an interruption and Michael Hotbody himself comes out to the stage, looking angry and flabbergasted at what's going on. "Gavin, what the hell do you think you're doing?!?"

"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest on the show, the soon-to-be former Cruiserweight Champion, Michael Hotbody! Michael, thank you for joining me here tonight!"

"What the hell are you talking about?!? Gavin, this is MY SHOW! That's MY SET! That was my podium you just broke! You're already in a lot of trouble as it is and now you're out here doing this?!? What the hell is wrong with you?!?"

"I'm just out here to talk about Bragging Rights, Michael. And now that you're out here, we can proceed. See, against all odds, your legal team has actually made some headway in their efforts to stop the ladder match from going down."

"Yeah, I know. That's what I was going to talk about on my show tonight before you..."

"Michael, you're too kind, but I've got this covered, OK? So Galino & Farnes have tried to get things between Hotbody and myself canceled because of the supposed discrimination of the match. Mind you, despite there being no actual proof of Hotbody's supposed fear of heights, the WWE isn't about to get thrown into a sea of litigation and risk tremendous liability. So it's with a heavy heart that I must announce that I have retracted my choice of stipulation, therefore there will be no ladder match at Bragging Rights."

The crowd boos at this announcment, but Hotbody is all smiles. "That's right! That's right, and you know what? It sounds so much better with you saying it! You thought you were going to pull a fast one and take advantage of my severe handicap! Well, look at what that got you! You get nothing! You deserve nothing! It's going to be such a merry Christmas at the Hotbody household this year! You, Gavin, can go choke on that lump of coal! Better luck next year! Maybe next time you should think twice about who you're trying to screw and hopefully your heart grows three sizes and you'll come to understand that this is all for the best. Thank you all, and enjoy the holidays!"

"Woah, woah, woah, let's not get ahead of ourselves. The stipulation may be off the table, but I'm still the number one contender to the title and I'm still entitled to pick what kind of match it's going to be at Bragging Rights. Now, I'm sure you've got some way to create another legal mess, so I've come up with a solution to this whole drama. This Thursday, on Superstars, how about you pick one of your goons to face me one-on-one. If they can beat me, I will relinquish my status as number one contender and you don't have to worry about me...but if I win, I keep that Bragging Rights date, and even though I can't make it a ladder match, I keep my right to name a stipulation and you CANNOT refuse it under any circumstances. What do you say?"

Hotbody ponders this over and turns to the entrance and makes a summoning motion with his hand. Galino & Farnes comes out and the three of them huddle, talking things over. They break after a bit and Hotbody returns his attention to Gavin. "Alright, if you're serious about giving up your title shot, you're on! This Thursday, you've got Jimmy Farnes. The wheels of justice may turn slowly, but rest assured Gavin, they're going to grind you to a pulp!" And so it looks like we've got this matter settled for now as Hotbody and his crew take their leave.

To the back we go as Paul Andrews is with his team, the number one contenders to the Women's Tag Team Titles, The Perfections! Andrews declares that neither Leah or Bonnie have ever really bought into the whole "better to give than to receive" thing. They're ready to receive those tag belts from Hannah and Bobbi Jo this Sunday. In the spirit of the season, Leah and Bonnie are hoping that the Southern Belles enjoy the remaining time they have as champions...and they'll make it relatively quick and painless when they take them away.

Fourth Match: Dusk and Debra Phillips vs. Ainsley and Phoebe Hanson
Well, we're back at it with Dusk. Let's see if she took anything Jenna said earlier to heart. Debra and Ainsley seem to be coming along nicely. I hope I can turn them into major players down the line. Dusk is the standout here for now. It's down to her and Ainsely and the latter gives it her all with a series of forearms to get Dusk down to her knee. Ainsley looks to come off the ropes with something big but Debra trips her up and that's the opening Dusk needs to get in for the Final Sunset and get the pin. ****1/2, 88% overall.

SPORTZ ENTERTAINMENT TIME!!!111 as Mr. Money in the Bank and Superstar of the Year Brandon Reigns comes on out to rap. "So how was your year, everyone? As you all are preparing to celebrate the coming of the next 365 days and open presents and be merry and all that, it only seems like the right time to ask yourselves if you deserve any of that. Do you really think you've earned any sort of reward or present or bonus or merriment this year? I know I have. This briefcase, this statuette, this status, I've earned it all. For me, it was Christmas virtually every month. You people? You have to wait all year for one moment and it's so sad to see. But never let it be said that I'm not generous. You may have to wait just a bit longer, but I am bringing the entire WWE Universe a very important gift. The gift of change. At WrestleMania I am opening the best present I could ever imagine. I am taking this briefcase to that main event and I'm going to become your new WWE Unified World Champion! You will all have the privilege of bearing witness to the birth of a new era. Forget Jesus, this will be the coming of an actual king worthy of worship! So take comfort in that fact that even though the gifts you get might be terrible, you will have me to look forward to. You will have a WWE that's headed by a champion you can be proud of. And in return for this generous offering, all I ask is that you all show me the respect that deserve! I can see some resistance out there, but understand that you're going to have no choice. You're eventually going to have to cave. You just watch Bragging Rights and see what I end up doing to Kerry Cemenko. He's choosing not to give me respect. He's choosing to muddy the waters and defy my status as Superstar of the Year. Kerry is another speed bump on my road to destiny. He'll learn, just like all of you will learn!"

And with that, we're going to get Kerry Cemenko interrupting things as he comes out and joins Reigns in the ring. "Brandon, there's not a doubt in my mind that you've got the chops to leave WrestleMania as the WWE Unified Champion when you cash in that contract. I just want you to remember one thing. When the confetti is falling all around you, and you're raising those two title belts over your head, and the crowd is making noise, and all the joy is flowing through you, I hope that you reflect on the moments leading up to that moment. Particularly, I hope you remember Bragging Rights and you reflect on the fact that I was better than you on that night and that I've got a claim to your ass and your title. Respect is a two-way street, Brandon, so if you want to continue this game of overlooking me, well it's a good thing I'm capable of reminding you otherwise." And with that, Kerry drops the mic and nails Reigns with a clothesline, knocking him down. Oh, no, we're not doing a holiday brawl, are we? Damn it, we are. Cemenko proceeds to use the decorations to knock Reigns around a bit before the Superstar of the Year decides it's not worth sticking around and he bails the first chance he gets, namely after shoving Kerry into the pile of presents on the stage. Does Cemenko have Brandon's number this Sunday?

Fifth Match: Kyle Jacobs vs. Ziggy Styles
We're reminded about the SmackDown! Send-off with Kyle Jacobs taking on Xavier Cross and Ziggy Styles taking on Michael Haywood. Xavier himself comes out on to the stage to watch. Michael then comes out and joins Xavier on the stage, giving him the stink eye, basically warning Xavier not to try anything. The match rocks all kinds of ass. It gets tense as things start reaching a climax. Xavier tries squirming his way down to the ring, but Michael matches him, wanting to keep Xavier out of the proceedings. Xavier eventually fires back and it looks like we've got an argument. It looks like Xavier comes up with a solution as it seems he's suggesting that they both just leave and go to the back, leaving the match be. That seems to be cool with Michael and Xavier even begins to leave first. Of course, that puts him in prime position to turn around and nail an unsuspecting Michael with a clothesline, knocking him down. Xavier continues his march to ringside, but he's greeted by Ziggy's body being flung over the top by Kyle. The ref begins the count, taking time in between to keep Kyle in the ring. Michael recovers and is full of piss and vinegar and he has Xavier in his sights. Xavier and Ziggy start coming to their feet, the latter trying to get back in the ring to beat the count. Michael charges at Xavier with a tackle attempt and that shoves Xavier into Ziggy, sandwiching the latter. Xavier and Michael brawl on the ground as Ziggy goes down again and the ref eventually reaches 10, having not seen Ziggy get crunched. Kyle is going to get the win but the fun isn't over as we get a two-on-two brawl to close out the segment. ****1/2, 93% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Wrakk, Chris Collins, and The Royal Effect vs. Ryan Pattillo, Seth Von Kamp, and the Wyldhearts
So you've got the three top titles being represented here. I'd say this is quite the collection here, and a great preview for what's down the road, both on SmackDown! and Bragging Rights. With 8 talented men and tremendous heat between them, this one's a lay up as far as getting over with the crowd. We want to send the crowd home happy for the holidays so this is going to be unfortunate for the heels. It comes down to McKay and Von Kamp as they renew their hatred from earlier this year and Seth isn't going let McKay forget about it. McKay gets things back under control by flipping out of a suplex attempt as Kavovit climbs up on the apron, Slammy in hand. McKay, with a waste lock, shoves Seth towards Kavovit but the Intercontinental Champion puts his boots up and kicks Kavovit off the apron, using the rebound to flip over McKay and setting him up for the Collapse of Society. It connects and that's going to be enough to get the pin for the faces. They win the battle for now, but the war is still going on. How's this all going to conclude? ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

23
 

So we've got the SmackDown! Send-off looking like this:

Kyle Jacobs vs. Xavier Cross (the likely main event)

WWE Unified Tag Team Titles: The Wyldhearts vs. The Royal Effect

Dusk vs. Faith Connors

Michael Haywood vs. Ziggy Styles

Clubber Harris vs. Zed Jones

I'd say there's room for at least one more. We'll see what I can do on Superstars.

Bragging Rights is looking like this:

WWE Unified World Title: Wrakk (c) vs. Ryan Pattillo

WWE Intercontinental Title: Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Chris Collins

WWE Women's Title: Sonya Braddock (c) vs. Jenna Kyle

WWE Women's Tag Team Title: The Southern Belles (c) vs. The Perfections

(pending Superstars) WWE Cruiserweight Title: Michael Hotbody (c) vs. Gavin Jones

Orlando Kincaid, Eddy Clash, and Haven vs. Quinten McDaniels, Hugo, and Chet Morris

Kerry Cemenko vs. Brandon Reigns

Simon Bennett vs. Adam Hail

Pre-show: Salvatore Scabbia, Ronnie & Carmella Costello vs. The Academy and Cordelia Capriati

I think I've packed things fairly well. The DUD show better stay the fuck home.

DUD shows are just the absolute worst. Except in your gaming universe where they're actually still filled with belters and the crowd are just imbeciles.

Bragging Rights sounds really good and "SmackDown Send-Off" is such a great tagline for a year-end show.

2
 

Superstars: December 27, 2040

Opening Match: Ozzy Mandias vs. Nigel Gallagher
Ozzy gets on the mic before things get underway and declares that he's not about to left out of the festivities. He still has a mad-on over Jordan Demiras and the fact that he struts around the place actually proud about being the Cruiserweight of the Year. "Jordan, you and Martyn LaSalle are two peas in a pod. You both overestimated your worth, and you did it at the expense of overlooking me! Well, I'm nothing if not fair. I laid out the challenge to LaSalle, so I'll extend the same courtesy to you, Jordan. If you've got the balls to actually put action behind your words, you can face me tomorrow night on the SmackDown! Send-off, where I'm going to do my damndest to send you off the same way I did LaSalle!" Oh, you know this is quality shit here and it kicks off the show with a bang. Ozzy ends up getting the pin after yanking Nigel off the top rope, causing him to get crotched. A Blizzard of Oz follows and that's going to secure the win. Ozzy doesn't have much time to celebrate afterwards as Jordan Demiras makes his way out with SERIOUS INTENT and tries getting his hands on Ozzy. Ozzy bails through the crowd, but Demiras looks like he's accepting Ozzy's challenge. Tomorrow night is really going to be something...hopefully. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Second Match: Cordelia Capriati vs. Tamara Whitford
Sophie Waters wants to rip into Brooke and her camp but feels that Cordelia can probably explain things better than she can as she has inside information so Sophie turns the mic over to her newest client to speak from the heart. "Brooke, it's really simple. There comes a time when enough is enough. Gratitude is a two-way street. You spent so much time and effort and energy in the hopes that you could finally have a world champion under your management that the rest of us were just expendable. I didn't come into the WWE to be chopped liver. It took me a while, but I saw the writing on the wall and Justin and Randy ditching you was the big iceberg that really started this whole unravelling. This Sunday, and this is for you, Carmella, you want to draw battlelines and think you're in the right camp? I'll personally make sure you go down with the ship." So this is a fine match, obviously meant to get Cordelia some shine ahead of things on Sunday. New faces in the women's singles can only help matters, plus it gives me a route to pursue for the women's title match at the Rumble. Oops, getting ahead of myself there. Cordelia puts Tamara away with the Crowning Achievement off the top. Carmella comes out onto the stage during the celebration to glare at Cordelia. ****1/2, 87% overall.

Third Match: The Perfections vs. The Brooklyn Sisterhood
Hey, it's more women's awesomeness. Leah and Bonnie, obviously, need the shine as they head into Bragging Rights for their title match. Wrestling is weird as you've got a chick like Leah who got mad heat just a few months ago being the rival of one of the more popular female stars and now just a few months later, she's over as a popular star as well. Anyway, the Sisterhood are great opponents here as the Perfections can demonstrate their resolve and resiliancy and all that face stuff. The Southern Belles try their hand at ruining things as Hannah has the ref distracted. Padgett has Leah up for the Red Hook as Bobbi Jo tries to sneak in and attack Bonnie from behind. Bonnie is quick to the punch, however, and kicks Bobbi in the midsection, then sends her into Padgett's midsection in spear-like fashion. Everyone goes down, but Leah ends up on top of Padgett. Bonnie kicks Hannah off the apron and the ref turns to count the pin on Padgett, giving the win to the Perfections. MOMENTUM HAS BEEN BUILT!!! ****1/2, 93% overall.

To the back we go as Eddy Clash has something on his mind. He admits that he doesn't know a whole lot about Orlando Kincaid, but he knows that the offer laid out by Kincaid on Raw was too tempting to ignore. A chance to kick in the head of that dumb oaf Hugo some more is just the kind of thing he's open to. Orlando Kincaid enters the picture and wants to set the record straight with Eddy. "I need you to understand something, Eddy. This match is all about me settling the score with Quinten. Now he's got some company that needs addressing, and that's where you and Haven fit in. We're not really partners in the traditional sense. This is my match, you two are just along for the ride, so I'm hoping and expecting that you can follow my lead."

Eddy leans in closer to Orlando and replies, "I'm willing to play along for this at least...but you still need to convince Haven about all that." And with that Eddy takes his leave as Orlando has something new to ponder over.

Fourth Match: Jimmy Farnes vs. Gavin Jones
Michael Hotbody and Galino & Farnes are out here with a contract that Hotbody says spells out all of the stipulations and intricacies of this match. It is IRON CLAD so that there are no loopholes that Lisa Benton and/or Gavin Jones can exploit to worm their way out of a negative outcome. Farnes gets on the mic and says that all parties have reviewed the document, verifying its authenticity and legality. The only signature missing is that of Gavin's. Gavin gets handed the contract and pen and he briefly looks at it with trepidation before ultimately putting his name on the dotted line, making things official. He needs the win here so that he can keep his title match at Bragging Rights and name an alternate stipulation, if he so chooses. Gavin puts up a hell of an underdog fight here, wanting desperately to get that win. The match starts going south when the ref is bumped and Gavin has to fight off interference from Hotbody's crew. He looks like he's run into a brick wall when Zed gets involved BUT HERE COMES CLUBBER HARRIS! That gets Zed's attention and he makes a beeline to the Ebony Experience and they have themselves a fight on the aisle. Luscious tries sneaking up onto the apron with her Slammy to nail Gavin, but he grabs her arm. Farnes charges at Gavin, who moves out of the way, taking the Slammy with him and Luscious gets knocked off into Hotbody's arms, sending them both down to the ground. The ref starts to come to and Gavin notices that fact and reacts by tossing Farnes the Slammy and feigning getting hit and falling down. The ref only sees the falling part, looks at Farnes holding the Slammy, and assumes the worst and calls for the bell, disqualifying Farnes and giving Gavin the win. Oh, that sneaky little bastard. Gavin makes his escape with an Eddie Guerrero-esque smirk on his face. Oh, but wait. He still gets to name a stipulation and he wants to make sure it's announced right now. He waits for Hotbody to be back up on his feet so that he can hear the news. "Well, despite all odds, Michael, I am still your number one contender for that title this Sunday. What can I say? Destiny just has a weird sense of humor. But it's not all bad news, Michael. The upside is that I can't ask for a ladder match, right? Everything else, though, is fair game and thanks to that IRON CLAD contract we all signed earlier, you CAN'T refuse the match, otherwise you can say goodbye to that title. So after much deliberation, the only real choice that I can make is that our match at Bragging Rights will be...A TLC MATCH!" The crowd explodes in delight as Gavin tosses the mic with a smirk on his face and Hotbody and crew go ballistic. Oh, how the turntables. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Fifth Match: Jason Sorola vs. Jesse Capalbo
Capalbo is all smiles and confidence after his outing on Raw. Sorola still has that aura of misery around him. He decides to take out all of his frustrations on poor Jesse here. It's still a rocking match. It comes to an end when Sorola goes to the eyes to escape an attempt by Jesse to lock in the Spitfire. Sorola sends Jesse through the ropes and he hits the ring post and Sorola schoolboys him for the win. Sorola gets on the mic afterward and mocks Jesse, telling him to not get so caught up in himself just because things are looking slightly up for him...a lesson certain people around here need to learn the hard way. That was rather ominous. ****1/2, 91% overall.

It's video package hype time as we take a look at the Women's Champion Sonya Braddock as she's been prepping for Jenna Kyle this Sunday for their title match. A voiceover from Braddock tells Jenna that 5 months without the title can build a lot of frustration in a person, and that Jenna is sadly mistaken if she thinks it was all taken out on Naomi at Survivor Series.

More promo time as we've got Andrea and Victor Dark. They want to talk about Orlando Kincaid and the wrinkle that he's created. It's rather disappointing as the two of them had high hopes for him, but now it seems that Orlando seems content on suffering the same fate as Haven. The only real hope that Orlando has is that things go quickly and painlessly on Sunday. It would be a shame if Victor had to get his hands dirty.

Sixth Match: Dusk vs. Phoebe Hanson
Faith is on commentary, hyping up the match between her and Dusk tomorrow night on the last SmackDown! of the year. This is a good "two birds with one stone" situation as we need to wrap up things between Dusk and Phoebe while getting the people ready for the showdown with Faith. I just hope I'm going too fast with Dusk here. I mean, if this were a real life thing, she's essentially getting involved with the biggest female star on the roster virtually right out of the gate. What was it, October, when she debuted? Anyway, we've got Dusk looking all powerful and dominant as Faith assures us that she's not going to get rattled by Dusk. Regardless of how she feels, Dusk wraps things up in a neat little fashion here as she catches Phoebe off a crossbody attempt, delivers a gut buster, and that stuns Phoebe enough to where Dusk can hit the Final Sunset and get the win. Faith looks on with a serious look in her eye, perhaps with concern. Dusk takes Sorrow and has him screech at Faith while she makes a threatening gesture with her free arm. How are things going to play out tomorrow night? ****1/4, 89% overall. Dusk gained 3 points of overness. Things are looking great for her.

Once more to the back as Jake Connelly looks like he's wrapping up some promotional stuff when Cameron Harper pops in. Jake is surprised to see him and asks what the deal is as he doesn't have matches booked for any of his clients tonight. Cameron responds by saying that he felt bad about the holidays coming and going and not getting anything for Jake. "After all, just agreeing to be my manager has meant so much, I don't want you to feel like I'm taking you for granted."

Jake responds by repeating what he had said a while back. "If you're not booked, you don't need to show up. Plus, we all agreed we weren't going to do gift exchanges."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, but chalk it up to anxiety or enthusiasm or whatever, I just couldn't help myself. You need to know how much I appreciate you, Jake. So, here, this is for you."

Cameron hands Connelly a wrapped gift, which Connelly reluctantly accepts. He thanks Cameron and begins to open it, but Ethan Lang comes in. Jake and Cameron both wonder what he's doing here and Ethan says that he came to give a present to Jake. "I know the agreement was that there wasn't going to be gifts being exchanged and what not"

Cameron looks mad and gets on Ethan's case. "Uh, yeah, we all said no presents. What's the deal, Ethan?"

"Yeah, I know, but my mother kind of gave me grief about the whole thing. She basically browbeat me into doing it. She's really appreciative of you, Jake, taking me under your wing and helping me out. She's always believed in me and my dream of making it here in the WWE. So, if it helps alleviate things, you can consider this more of a gift from her than from me. Here you go."

Cameron isn't having any of it. "Wow. You're really something else, you know that, Ethan? You're gonna play the Mom card? You're just trying to carry favor, that's all. Jake, you shouldn't accept that present. Just being happy to be his manager is good enough, right?"

"Wait, you just gave me a present, too, Cameron."

"Yeah, but this is different because I actually mean it."

"What the hell are you getting at, Cameron?" Ethan asks rather defensively. Both he and Cameron start sniping over each other as Jake's face turns to frustration.

Jake has heard enough and demands that everyone calms the hell down. He says he's grateful for everything from both of them. He's grateful for all of his clients. He appreciates both of their gifts and he'd hate for this moment to be ruined by a bunch of pettiness. The two of them just got back on the same page last week so what the hell is happening here? Jake reminds them they have a match tomorrow for SmackDown! Send-off and wants to be sure they're going to close out the year the right way.

Ethan and Cameron seem to agree and apologize to each other. Ethan and Jake start to leave until Cameron asks Jake if he's going to open the presents. Jake and Ethan stop and Jake relents and decides why not. Cameron insists that Jake opens his first. Jake proceeds to do so and he appears rather puzzled as to what he sees it is. Cameron is all smiles and explains it to Jake and Ethan. "See, isn't it great? It's a framed photo of me celebrating the first win I ever got after becoming your client! Now it may seem like it's just all me, but I made sure to get you there in the background in the lower right corner. See? Look how happy you are for me! I knew you'd want something like this commemorated because it's a portrait of the foundation that we've built together. Merry Christmas, Jake, I knew you'd like it!"

Jake looks like he isn't sure how to take all this but manages to utter out a thanks while looking at the picture. He turns his attention to the present Ethan gave him and opens it up. His expression is that of shock and wonder and joy as he sees what it is. "Oh, Ethan, no freaking way. I can't believe you remembered! Hell, I can't believe you even found this thing!" He holds up the contents and it's a jacket. Cameron looks confused and says it's just a jacket. Jake clarifies by explaining that it's the first jacket he ever wore on a show when he was first starting out. "Yeah, I told Ethan all about it. I didn't have anything snazzy to wear for the match and the promoter just threw this thing at me and said it was OK to use it for the night as long as he got it back. Unfortunately, I left the jacket too close to the crowd and there was some kind of fight or whatever happening and a bunch of beer and other crap spilled all over it. The promoter told me to just keep the damn thing, but he docked my pay for the night. I thought I'd lost this thing a long time ago. Ethan, you didn't have to go through all that trouble."

"Yeah, Ethan! You shouldn't have done that!" Cameron snaps. Jake and Ethan look really uncomfortable and ultimately Jake says that he's thankful for both of the presents but they need to focus on business now. He expects the two of them to move past this. And with that, Jake goes off on his merry way leaving Ethan alone with Cameron glaring at him.

MAIN EVENT: Simon Bennett and Seth Von Kamp vs. Adam Hail and Chris Collins
Let's close this out strong. Collins declares that he has always been better than Seth Von Kamp. Seth has managed to get to where he is because Collins hasn't been in his way. "Well, you couldn't avoid me forever, Seth. The past has a way of sneaking up and catching up with you in the worst ways possible. It's about time someone brought you off that cloud 9 and dragged you kicking and screaming to Earth!" With that out of the way, let's have ourselves a banger! Four veterans, all over as fuck, 2 sets of feuds. It all adds up to a match that has the crowd eating it all up. Speaking of eating, Hail delivers a drop toe hold to Bennett, sending him throat first into the middle rope. That leaves him vulnerable to a Hailstorm off the top from Adam. The ref goes for the pin, but Bennett manages to get his foot on the bottom rope at two. The ref doesn't see it though and Nathan Quinn earns his pay by pushing the foot off and the ref continues the count as if nothing happened, giving Adam and Chris the undeserved victory. Adam isn't done as Nathan hands him a length of chain. He wraps it around his fist and proceeds to pound away at Simon's forehead a few times, busting him open. We close the show with Adam standing tall, holding the chain up high over a fallen Bennett. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

Wrakk wants a couple of matches with Duke. I think he's back on the stuff that caused him to get suspended in the first place.

Chris Collins wants to be in a regular team with Adam Hail. Yeah, I don't see that happening. You have been paying attention to Hail's story, haven't you, Chris?

:lol: Gavin Jones resorting to the Eddie Guerrero trick. That is an absolutely timeless spot and one I pop for every single time. So many variations of it are great too, like the heel having to plead with the ref to not call for the bell only to then get rolled up anyway.

TLC MATCH bah gad. Maybe Hotbody should invest in some better lawyers. Galino & Farnes can't be much more effective than Barry Zuckerkorn.

And I love when guys have good chemistry in the ring and propose being a regular tag team despite the character being a prick. He's like that delusional girl convinced she will be the one to finally tame the broken bad boy.

I got SmackDown! and Bragging Rights done and ready to be typed up. They turned out pretty damn good if I may say so myself. I'll try to get them written up by Saturday. This laughing fit I suffered from one of the rinky-dink promotions offering me a job set me back a bit.

SmackDown!: December 28, 2040

It's the final SmackDown! of the year. Let's do this shit!!!

Opening Match: WWE Unified Tag Team Titles
The Wyldhearts (c) vs. The Royal Effect
This is, of course, The Royal Effect's rematch after losing the belts a month ago. The results here should speak volumes as to why they deserve that Tag Team of the Year Slammy. The Wyldhearts are great pretty boy underdogs and it's a banger the whole way through. We get shenanigans in the finish, however. The ref is bumped pretty badly and as a consequence we get a second official down while the first gets attended to. The match continues its awesomeness and as the second ref is turned around helping the first out of the ring, McKay fakes tagging in by clapping his hands as it looks like Kavovit can't make it to the corner. He comes in and immediately hits the Mass Effect on a dazed Robbie Greer and the second ref counts the pin. NEW CHAMPIO...woah, woah, woah, wait a second. The first ref is back on his feet and gets into the ring and puts a halt to this. It looks like he's telling the second ref that he saw McKay coming in illegally. They relay this to the timekeeper and announcer and thus we restart the match. The Royal Effect are besides themselves. Bellamey rolls Kavovit back into the ring as Greer dropkicks McKay to the outside. Kavovit is left 2-on-1 and he falls victim to the Heartstopper and thus that leads to Greer getting the pin for the actual official victory. I don't see The Royal Effect letting that one go, but what a way to start the show. *****, 95% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Hotbody has his set in the ring adorned with ladders. Aside from that, he looks miserable and defeated as he addresses the crowd.

"I want you all to take a look at the scene before you. This horridness is what Lisa Benton and Gavin Jones are trying to force on me at Bragging Rights! Forget my TOTALLY REAL fear of heights. Just the sheer brutality and carnage and bedlam that typically comes with a TLC match is enough to make my stomach wretch. Gavin, you think you're so clever with what you pulled last night, but all it did was demonstrate just how sick and twisted and vindictive you really are! When are people around here going to learn that you can't just take out your inadequacies on me. I'M THE VICTIM HERE! My good people, I know you don't want to see this match unfold at Bragging Rights. I know you have a strong sense of justice, just like I do. So I implore you all to fill those petitions, flood those inboxes, and raise those voices in a huge show of opposition for this vulgar display of cowardice! You people, your cries and your support, are the last hope in getting this unfair situation thrown out. Lisa will listen to you! She couldn't bear seeing such a revolt! There is no need for...."

And that right there is where the challenger for Hotbody's title, Gavin Jones is going to interrupt things. He shows no fear or remorse as he enters the ring and gets all up in Hotbody's space. "Michael, I want you to understand something about this match. It's not really all about the gold. The hope of me capturing that Cruiserweight Title is only a small part of it. The real appeal is being able to use all of this lovely hardware to hopefully shut up that God damn trap of yours. But, hey, listen, I consider myself a bit to be a man of the people, too, so let's make this fair. How about we just forego all that campaigning you asked for and we get the crowd right here to settle things?"

"Wait a minu...."

"No, no, it's fine, Michael, I got this. Ladies and gentlemen, in the words of the immortal Scott Hall, it's survey time! How many of you here don't want to see a TLC match this Sunday at Bragging Rights for the Cruiserweight Title?" The crowd just erupts in a aura of boos and the camera catches several people giving the thumbs down. "OK, OK, now for the next question: how many of you here want to see me, Gavin Jones, use every table, ladder, and chair he can get his hands on to break this weak sauce, spineless, man-baby's stupid face over and over and over and over and over and over again until he won't even be able to remember his own name and we get ourselves a NEW Cruiserweight Champion?"

The crowd, of course, starts going apeshit with approval before Gavin can even finish the question. He walks around the ring, looking out to the crowd with the mic pointed out to them and the cheers just get louder. He starts to turn around to address Hotbody but Hotbody decides to introduce a ladder to Gavin's face instead of continuing this dialogue. "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT ON SUNDAY, GAVIN?!?" he screams into the mic. Hotbody isn't done and decides to demolish the set by knocking ladders over onto Gavin's body. He grabs a chair and proceeds to pound Gavin across his back with it. He stops and fixates on a ladder. He takes the mic and declares that he's going to conquer his fear right now. He takes a ladder and carries it with him to the corner where he climbs to the top turnbuckle, then rides the ladder down, shouting "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" as it falls forward onto Gavin, crushing his mid-section. Hotbody gets back on the mic in joy, declaring that he might have conquered his fear and wants to try that again. He sets everything back up again and sure enough, does the same thing to Gavin, again shouting "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" the whole way down. He looks satisfied with what he's done and leaves the ring as Gavin looks seriously hurt.

Second Match: Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper vs. The Millennium Rebels
Before Lang and Harper come out, we're shown the backstage area where Connelly is with Lang, getting ready. Harper pops in, eager to get going. Connelly notices that Harper has something in his hand. "Uh, Cameron? Is that the framed picture you got for me for Christmas?"

"Yeah, of course. I saw that you forgot it at the hotel, but don't worry. I made sure to get it so that it could be here tonight," Cameron explains.

Connelly is dumbfounded as he responds. "Uh, I didn't 'forget it', Cameron. I left it there. It's a nice gift and I appreciate it, but it's a picture. There's no reason for it to be brought to a match."

"No, see, that's where you're wrong. It's inspiration! It's a sign of humble beginnings and a reminder of where we came from. It's a symbol and it's going to motivate us all to be our best every time we're out there in that ring!" Cameron explains with enthusiasm.

Connelly sighs with resignation and turns to Ethan asking him what he thinks. Ethan says that he really doesn't care either way; they need to get going. Connelly reluctantly tells Cameron that it's fine, but to focus on the match.

Well, with that out of the way, the match is sweet as hell. We get shots of the framed picture as it rests on the announce table throughout the match. Things come to a head when Dangerson gets launched over the top rope by Harper via back body drop, and Sammy is left alone with Lang to suffer the Bitter Languish to give Connelly's boys the win. Harper goes into overdrive mode as he immediately grabs the photo and parades around the ring with it in celebration. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Third Match: Ozzy Mandias vs. Jordan Demiras
You want cruiserweights? You got cruiserweights. Ozzy is, of course, still miffed about supposedly being overlooked and the fact that Jordan is the Cruiserweight of the Year. He did some hurt on poor Martyn LaSalle and he's looking to do the same here. It's all good shit as you'd expect as Demiras demonstrates the moves that helped him get that aforementioned accolade. Ozzy looks like he's got Jordan in a precarious and vulnerable state and he goes to the top rope to try to home in on the kill. Jordan manages to shake off enough cobwebs to where he springboards off the middle rope AND HITS AN AXE KICK ON OZZY WHILE HE'S ON THE TURNBUCKLE! Ozzy is dazed and he collapses to the outside in an ugly fashion. Jordan goes back down, having spent himself and the ref counts Ozzy out. That's not going to sit well with him and sure enough, as soon as he recovers and realizes what's up he goes on the assault on the fallen Jordan Demiras. More refs come on out to get in between the two and to get Ozzy out of there. No doubt the feud must continue. *****, 94% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as the WWE Women's Champion Sonya Braddock makes her way out in front of the crowd. "I know I wasn't scheduled to be here tonight, but I found that to be a bit of a problem. This is the last SmackDown! of the year, but more importantly it's the last one before this Sunday at Bragging Rights, and it's only right that I get a couple of last minute things off my chest before I defend this title. Jenna Kyle, it's fine if you don't feel intimidated or nervous with the idea of facing me. What I really hope you feel is honored. Honored to be the last victim that helps me close the book on this year with a bang. There's no shame to it. You, and Faith for that matter, have a lot to be proud of in 2040. And I have no doubt you'll go on to accomplish even more greatness in the coming year. But you're going to have to have to start it without this title. Those five long months I spent at home without this title were filled with some of the longest days I've ever experienced. More stressful than any match, more agonizing than any pain, living while not being recognized as the best woman this industry has to offer is a torture. Jenna, I know on some level you understand that sentiment, and that's why I know I'm walking into a fight this Sunday. The lion's den is waiting for you, Jenna. You may leave with some glory, but you won't leave with the gold."

That should be the end of it, but it looks like things are going to pick up as the arena is filled with the sounds of a screeching raven and the music of the Doll of Darkness hits, heralding the arrival of Dusk herself. Oh, this looks bad as she makes her way down to the ring and confronts the Women's Champion, who stands defiant as a mountain as she observes Dusk's entrance. Dusk has a mic of her own and she addresses Sonya. "Forgive me, but I'm sure you'll understand when I ask you to beat it. I've got my own slaughter to which I must attend and you're in the way. I think you're familiar with her, no? You barely got past her earlier this year if I recall. And now we're being forced to be an audience to this megalomania. I'd ask if you had any degree of shame flowing through you, but that's not really a trait associated with people like you."

"People like me? You mean a winner? A champion?"

"A monument. You're the kind of person who is propped up for the rest of us to admire. The only thing to admire about you, however, is that prize you hold. I have no doubt you'll remain on this path of glory, which means it'll only be a matter of time before you cross my own path and I have my opportunity to take that symbol of power."

"This isn't a symbol of power. It's excellence. The power is in the woman holding it. You must live in a really, really remote void if you've got designs on being the woman who can carry this, and if your theater hasn't moved Jenna or Faith, you can rest assured it hasn't got a prayer against me."

"Another so-called fearless competitor stands before me. Those are always a treat...because I get to put the fear in them. Do yourself a favor and watch what unfolds here tonight. It should prove quite educational. Now if you don't mind, there's the exit." Dusk points to the ramp, essentially signaling Sonya to leave. Sonya really has no recourse as we've got a match scheduled so she exits the ring, locking eyes with Dusk the whole time. The music of Faith Connors hits and the Parkour Princess herself makes her entrance and that's going to segue right into...

Fourth Match: Dusk vs. Faith Connors
I wonder if it's too early to do this match. I mean, sure, we're getting a great outcome here BUT AT WHAT COST?!? Anyways, Faith shows her usual fire, still pissed as all hell over that pesky chair to the face incident at Survivor Series. Dusk plays Vader to Faith's Sting, though, and is all about shutting down Faith's craziness. Faith plays a tremendous underdog here as she gets bounced around like a pinball, showcasing how willing she is to put Dusk over. The best analog would be her match against Sonya earlier in the year. Anyways, despite the brutalization of her body, Faith starts the comeback and through it all manages to counter a boot from Dusk into the Crisis of Faith. It only stuns her and she doesn't go completely down. Faith summons enough juice to attempt a Mirror's Edge but Dusk catches her as she comes off. Dusk looks like she going to power bomb Faith into the opposite corner as she runs towards it with Faith in position. Faith, though, uses the last of her reserves to roll off Dusk, sunset flip style, pull Dusk down into a pinning predicament and adds a jackknife for good measure and extra leverage and that's going to get Faith the upset victory. Unfortunately, like it was mentioned before, that was the last gasp from Faith and she's vulnerable to an irate Dusk and her retribution. Dusk rag dolls Faith around some more before going for a chair. She proceeds to lay it across Faith's face and then stomps on it. We get medical staff out on the referee's orders as it looks pretty bad for Faith, despite her win. Is Dusk the new scourge of the women's division? ****1/2, 93% overall.

To back we go as the number one contender to the WWE Unified World Title Ryan Pattillo has some last minute thoughts to get off his chest. He starts out by saying he's moved by what just went down in the previous match as Faith went through absolute hell and she's in a bad way. He feels for her, as it's a scene that nobody wants to be a part of. He hopes he doesn't have to experience that at Bragging Rights, but he will go through it if he has to if it means walking out of there the new WWE Unified World Champion. It's been too long and the stakes are too high. He's played this game with Wrakk before and he's still standing here, ready for more and ready to be champion.

Fifth Match: Zed Jones vs. Clubber Harris
Michael Hotbody gets on the mic before the match starts as he wants to lay down the law for Harris. "Harris, I know you're not the brightest knife in the drawer, but after witnessing what went down earlier between Gavin and me, even you have to be able to recognize that I am, in fact, a dangerous dude, and logically you'd be able to conclude that I only run with a dangerous crew. Witness Lord Zed standing right here before you! Your accolades and accomplishments may impress mere mortal men, but they only fuel the machine that's running under this chasis. And Gavin, if you're even capable of hearing me right now, there's plenty more where that came from because Camp Hotbody knows how to get physical when the circumstances call for it! Now let's get this show on the road, and Harris, I hope that throughout the pain you're about to experience, this one thought can solace you: you asked for this!" So it's hoss-on-hoss and you can imagine how that goes. Harris utilizes the experience advantage, but that's constantly halted via outside shenanigans from Hotbody when ref isn't looking. The match comes to a close as things look pretty drastic for Harris as it seems Zed is looking to lock in the Dragon Sleeper BUT HERE COMES GAVIN JONES! He's looking pretty bad as he limps out clutching his side but with determination in each step...and a chair in the other hand. He makes a beeline for Hotbody and even with Gavin's condition, the champ is not interested in further confrontation. Zed stops what he's doing and reaches over the top rope to grab Gavin by the head. Luscious has the ref distracted as she's trying to get him to do something about Gavin. Gavin responds by smacking Zed in the face with the chair and he stumbles backward into the waiting arms of Clubber Harris. Zed suffers Club Pain from Harris as Gavin continues the chase, sending Hotbody and Luscious running and the ref counts the pin, giving Harris the victory.

Hold the phone! Lisa Benton makes her way out and asks for a bit of control from everyone. "Things have certainly gone off the rails here and I need to be able to know that things don't go off any further than they have to. From what I've witnessed here tonight, it's clear that there needs to be a few safeguards for this Sunday. Therefore, in the match for the Cruiserweight Title between Michael Hotbody and Gavin Jones...everyone is banned from ringside!" Hotbody and crew throw another fit over this bit of news and Gavin gets a devilish grin on his face. It looks really bad for the champion on Sunday. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Sixth Match: Ziggy Styles vs. Michael Haywood
Ziggy tries a pre-match motivational speech but Michael just spears the shit out of him to start the ball here. Clearly he's heard enough. Besides he can always get Ziggy with it after the match. Or not. Probably for sure not. Ziggy weathers the storm and it eventually settles down into an awesome competitive affair, despite Ziggy's goofiness. Michael's rage can't be contained too long as he escapes an attempt at the Thing-ama-Zig from Ziggy and immediately locks in the Rage Quit. And much like Survivor Series, Ziggy can't take the heat for long and submits. Michael has the awareness this time around to let go and not get disqualified. I'd say that's a pretty definitive cap to this whole affair. *****, 94% overall.

More In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as Orlando Kincaid wants his turn at addressing the people. "It's a damn shame that I have to wait a little bit longer than most to get my present, but what keeps me from going insane with anticipation is that I already know what I'm going to get and that it's going to be worth the wait. This Sunday at Bragging Rights, I've got three targets down range that need a lesson in manners. First is a big, bad, dumb nutcase named Hugo. Tall as a Christmas tree, but not as bright and definitely easier to cut down to size. Next, some uppity hillbilly named Chet Morris. Chet, this little reunion we're having only served to remind me how much I never really liked you back in the day. You've come back declaring yourself to be in the middle of a reawakening! Well, make sure your ass shows up Sunday because I've got a way to knock you out again. And last, and certainly not least, the biggest pain the ass, the one who's going to put a smile on my face and make it the best holiday season ever when he's coughing up blood all over this ring after I pound his carcass, Quinten McDaniels! Quinten, I'm no Santa Claus but you're definitely on my naughty list right at the top. And while I don't have any coal I'm more than prepared to dish out the lumps. Quinten, I tried warning you away. You apparently never learned anything about me in that entire time we were all together. Well, Bragging Rights is where you get all the instruction you missed out, only it's going to be taught the hard way. As a bonus, I've got two assistant instructors that will make the lesson go a lot smoother. Eddy Clash and Haven, you're more than welcome to take what you think is your pound of flesh, but just keep in mind that this match is my brainchild and it's my show. I run a tight ship and I expect to see that this Sunday. If you're not on board with that, now's the time to let me know and you can go jump overboard."

That's going to cause Haven to make himself known as the lights go dim and the music of the Dark Shepherd plays. What will he have to say about all of this, including Kincaid's demands? Haven steps up to Orlando and speaks his mind. "I will applaud your spine in this situation, Orlando. You always were the initiative of the Order. But while you may have outgrown me, understand that you still have ways to go before you surpass me. I am no leader to you; this is certainly true. However, the same can be said of you. And when it comes to the affairs of Victor Dark, I warn you as a courtesy that you are in over your head. As far as unity for the sake of this fight, however, I will state this for the record, right here and now. I will do what I need to in order to survive, and more importantly, whatever is necessary to send the right message. I will be your ally, but I will not be your underling. Make of that what you will, Orlando. I have far more pressing issues that concern me more than your feelings."

Orlando smirks before delivering his rebuttal. "You always did have a way with words. Fortunately, I'm in a position where I'm not at their beck and call. But as long as we're all playing nice, it's fine with me." Orlando starts to leave but stops as he looks to deliver one final point. "Oh, and by the way, Haven. It's not gone unnoticed by me that this whole theater is essentially all because of one man's grudge against you. So when you get a chance, do us all a favor, and handle your business...or I'll have to handle it for you." And with that, Orlando goes off on his merry way, leaving Haven to think about what he said. How's this all going to play out on Sunday?

MAIN EVENT: Kyle Jacobs vs. Xavier Cross
If this were a real promotion, I could picture Kyle being a guy that gets the win here, uses it to start a buzz, and then go on to have an awesome showing in the Rumble next month. Not saying he's going to win the Rumble or anything...probably. :shifty: Anyways, these guys have a good amount of matches against each other under their belt, so you can imagine they've got things down by now. It's a great way to close out the show. Shame I couldn't squeeze them into the PPV. That aside, we finish things off, or rather Kyle finishes things off, with Cross getting his attempt at the Cross Cutter countered as Kyle slips free from the grasp and turns it into a Legacy Bomb to get the win. Kyle does his victory lap as confetti falls as SmackDown! says goodbye to 2040. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

See you at Bragging Rights!

Bragging Rights: December 30, 2040

Pre-show Match: Salvatore Scabbia, Ronnie & Carmella Costello vs. The Academy and Cordelia Capriati
It's the complete breakdown of what was once Brooke's united group of clients in all of its ugly glory. Brooke and Sophie are with their respective teams as this match is a great warm-up for the crowd. It goes south for the face team as things start to collapse and Carmella and Cordelia have themselves a catfight on the outside in the midst of the chaos. Brooke and Sophie try separating the two, but Brooke goes the extra mile by forearming Sophie in the face. That draws Justin's attention and he goes after Brooke and Carmella. His chase is cut off by Ronnie who clothelines him down as he turns the corner. This leaves Randy Ellis alone with Scabbia and he falls victim to the Omerta to give Brooke's team the victory as he passes out. Maybe things haven't completely imploded over in Brooke's camp? ****1/2, 89% overall.

BRAGGING RIGHTS STARTS NOW!!!

Tonight's theme song is "Vicious" by Halestorm

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Opening Match: Brandon Reigns vs. Kerry Cemenko
This was really the best option for the opening match, even though I debated back and forth in my head. Cemenko does have a habit of having a banger of a first match, leaving the rest of the card in a rough position. Well, they need to earn their paychecks anyway, especially a certain pair of really expensive fuckers. THEY KNOW WHO THEY ARE! Anyways, both men here have their working boots on tonight and set the table in an awesome fashion. Reigns was certainly a top choice to win that award. The end comes when Cemenko tries coming off the middle rope for a Curb Stomp, but Reigns rolls out of the way and immediately grabs a schoolboy pin using his feet on the ropes for some extra cheating and that's going to give Mr. Money in the Bank the win. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Second Match: WWE Women's Tag Team Titles
The Southern Belles (c) vs. The Perfections
I don't think this will be the blow off for this whole ordeal, but it's a fucking great match either way. Leah's really come a long way in such a short time. It probably was for the best that I had started her out feuding with one of the top women in the company. Bonnie plays face-in-peril for this outing as the Belles just dismantle her for a good chunk of time. Hot tag to Leah is eventually made and she comes in on fire. It's a massive flurry from her and she gets set to come running off the ropes to deliver something to Bobbi Jo, while the ref tries getting Hannah out of the ring as she's not legal. Nathan Quinn trips Leah up, though, and that causes Paul Andrews to come over to tackle his ass and begin a scuffle on the outside. The ref is distracted with that now and the Belles try double-teaming Leah. They set her up for a double suplex, but Bonnie comes back and clips Hannah, taking her out of the picture. Officials have come down to separate Nathan and Paul, allowing the ref to turn her attention back to the match and witness Leah reverse and roll Bonnie up in a small package and that's going to get her the pin and the titles!

Winners and NEW WWE Women's Tag Team Champions: The Perfections! ****1/2, 93% overall.

Third Match: WWE Cruiserweight Title: TLC Match
The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody (c) vs. Gavin Jones
Michael INSISTS on hanging up the belt himself as he's already mad over this whole situation so he might as well just get it over with. The bell rings and he tries running away immediately up the ramp to the stage. Gavin is in hot pursuit and he catches up with the champion and they brawl on the set. Hotbody has the bright idea of low blowing Gavin and sending him into some of the set pieces. He immediately runs back down to the ring, grabbing a ladder on the way, and sets it up to try to grab the belt as fast as he can. Is this going to be the shortest TLC match in history? Well, no, as Gavin manages to make his back to the ring and grabs Hotbody's leg. Hotbody realizes this and tries begging off, but Gavin merely shakes his head and yanks Michael off. Now the fun can begin. Gavin just absolutely unloads on Michael, fucking up his shit royally with chairs. Michael buys himself a few hope spots here and there, but they're fleeting for the most part as the match goes on. It's a wild affair that comes to an end when Gavin manages a Frog Splash on Michael. That's clearly not enough in Gavin's mind and he goes up one of the ladders and delivers a Frog Splash from the top of that. Hotbody is DONE! Gavin sees that this is the perfect time to go for the belt as Michael is no shape to stop him. Gavin climbs up and starts to remove the title from its position. We're going to have new cha...WAIT A MINUTE!!! WHAT JUST HAPPENED? Something went off in Gavin's face! It looks like paint or dye or some kind of liquid! It looks like it came from the apparatus holding the belt. Either way, it makes Gavin let go of the belt and he goes falling off the ladder in an ugly fashion. Now he's blinded and hurt. Hotbody starts coming around as Gavin struggles to get to his feet, trying to clear his vision. Hotbody sees Gavin in his vulnerable state and takes advantage, grabbing Gavin from behind and sending him over the top rope through a table on the outside. Hotbody is free to climb the ladder! He fights his way up, no doubt in tremendous pain (and fear) but he eventually makes it to the top and retrieves the title to retain yet again! Hotbody's crew immediately comes down to collect Hotbody's broken body and get him the hell out of there. *****, 95% overall.

Fourth Match: WWE Women's Title
Sonya Braddock (c) vs. Jenna Kyle
Jenna is FEARLESS here and determined as all hell. This almost beat for beat the kind of match Sonya had with Faith back in April, just not as brutal as Jenna isn't insane like Faith is. Jenna tries a ground game with the mighty champion, managing to put Sonya in danger a few times using her elevated Boston Crab. The champion isn't going down that easy and fights back viciously. The match comes to an end as Jenna once again looks like she's got Sonya set up for another Crab attempt. Sonya fights to not get turned over but Jenna is just stubborn. Finally, Sonya cuts the proverbial Gordian knot by just nailing Jenna with the Left Hand of God as she's struggling to lock in the hold. That's going to put out Jenna's lights and Sonya gets on top for the pin and that's enough to give her the win and keep the title. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fifth Match: WWE Intercontinental Title
Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Chris Collins
Two experienced vets with a lot of mileage between them. You know this is going to go well. Both men know each other inside and out so the match is all about gamesmanship and trying to predict what the other will do. The match ends when Collins is overzealous and thinks Seth is ripe for the pickings after giving him an alley-oop face first into the top turnbuckle. He tries the Fall From Heaven, but Seth slips out the back and hoists Collins up and into the Collapse of Society and the pin is academic after that. Seth retains! ****1/2, 93% overall.

Sixth Match: Orlando Kincaid, Haven, Eddy Clash vs. Quinten McDaniels, Hugo, Chet Morris
Oh, boy. To say we're not going to get much control here is an understatement. We don't even get a face-in-peril segment as everyone is just at 60 mph the whole way through. It's down to Chet and Haven as the legal men for their respective teams. Haven has Chet by the throat but Quinten comes in from behind with a chair while the ref is busy with Hugo and Eddy, and whacks Haven with it. Orlando tackles Quinten out of the ring and proceeds to unload on him on the outside. Chet has Haven in trouble BUT HERE COMES LYLE MORRIS!!! Chet's cousin is back from the beat he took just a few weeks ago! Chet is speechless as he watches his cousin coming down the aisle and that's the opening Haven needs to recover and hit the Sting of Solace of him to get the pin for the faces. Lyle comes into the ring afterwards and tries getting him some of the fallen Chet, but Hugo pulls his teammate out of the ring and gets him out of there. What's next for all of these guys now? ****1/2, 93% overall.

Seventh Match: Adam Hail vs. Simon Bennett
We're told that due to the behavior of Nathan Quinn and Paul Andrews earlier, neither manager is going to be allowed here for this match. So we have a length of chain that's going to be perfectly legal to use for the match as per Simon's right to choose. You better believe it's put to good use from both men. Adam manages to reopen Simon's forehead and that's going to get the blood flowing on his end. It's nothing but good shit reminiscent of old NWA bloody brawls in Mid-Atlantic. Bennett eventually gets a good solid run of straight offense, including a ton of whips from the chain across Hail's back. It comes to a conclusion when Bennett manages to wrap the chain around Adam's neck and uses it to help apply the Bennett Lock. It looks really bad for Hail, especially when he's got blood coming out of his mouth. He tries to fight out of it as he's not giving up but his body eventually fails him and referee has no choice but to call for the bell and stop the match and award the victory to Bennett. I'd say that's pretty final if you ask me. We get help for Hail as he's still down and out, and Bennett makes his exit, bloody and victorious. ****1/2, 93% overall.

God damn, 4 matches in a row with the same fucking rating?!?

MAIN EVENT: WWE Unified World Title
Wrakk (c) vs. Ryan Pattillo
Let's end this night on a high note, shall we? Take their match from a few months ago and crank it up about 5 or notches. The gold is on the line after all. Pattillo takes no shit from Wrakk the whole way through and matches the physicality. The ref is bumped when he checks on Wrakk who's slumped in the corner and Pattillo tries to nail him with a corner clothesline. Wrakk "accidentally" pulls the ref in the way as he moves out of the corner. We're going to be lawless for a while here. Wrakk nails Ryan from behind and then goes out to grab one of his title belts. He has nefarious uses in mind for it as he climbs back into the ring. Ryan headbutts Wrakk's midsection as he gets back up to his feet and Wrakk loses his grip on the belt. More brawling and eventually Wrakk gets in a position to where he tries the Demon Cross but Pattillo counters and has Wrakk set up for a Shutdown BUT HERE COMES JASON SOROLA!!! WTF IS THIS?!? Sorola grabs the fallen title belt and plasters Pattillo in the back of the head with it and makes his escape as the ref comes to. Wrakk takes the vulnerable Pattillo and hits the Demon Cross and goes for the pin. The ref makes the three count and that's going to allow Wrakk to retain the Unified World Title. We go off the air with Wrakk in celebration and Sorola glaring at Pattillo on the mat. What is this all about? ****1/2, 93% overall.

Make that 5 matches in a row.

Overall show rating: 94%

How are we going to close out the year on Raw?

Banger of a PPV for sure. And a killer theme. I don't think I've ever seen that many matches in a row pull identical ratings before but it's all great shit so so be it. Thankfully the horrible DUD show did not rear its ugly head.

As always, Hotbody's stuff was great. I was wondering how he'd be able to weasel out of it this time and I can't say I saw the black ink thing coming. Love it. Also love that he'd pissed Gavin off to such an extent that Gavin chased him up the ramp instead of just going up the ladder right then and there. Babyfaces and their lust for revenge can bite them in the ass sometimes.

Chet vs. Lyle being set up is a great outcome for that trios match. A good 'ol fashioned Family Feud is always a winning angle.

I still laugh at thinking that Hail and Bennett were brought in on the world's most expensive open contracts and they parlayed it into a lengthy run and a big stipulation match program. Out of curiosity, what stip do you pick in-game for a chain match?

WHY SOROLA WHY???

Yeah, "Vicious" is one of my favorite songs from them, and it's even better live. That many matches in a row getting the same outcome is a WTF moment for sure, but that just means everyone had a fire under their asses. And I'm especially grateful that the DUD spared not just this show but the SmackDown! Send-Off as well.

I'm sure Gavin didn't see it coming either.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!!!!

But, yeah, Hotbody continuing to Honkey Tonk his way through this run would be something to see in real life. And you just know the moniker is going to get longer after this. I'm just proud that he was able to conquer his fears in the face of such tremendous adversity.

That six-man gave me pause as to who should take the loss because a lot of them have been on a rough string of losses on PPVs and at the same time the Stable That Isn't a Stable needs to be established, but I figured this was a good out for them so they don't lose too much face. Chet and Lyle will probably take care of their business at the Rumble. Now about the rest of the crew? We'll see about that.

I mean, I'm paying them all that money, they'd better fucking deliver. I should've done a stipulation here where the loser gets the axe to really put a nail in the feud and save me some payroll expenses, but I'm not quite done with them as I need a contender for the World Title at the Rumble. Oops...let it slip. I'm pretty sure I just did a Hardcore Match for this outing as it was probably the closest thing to what I had in mind. I wish there were chain/strap matches as part of the game.

The black sheep of the Hunters needs his attention. :(

I need to get to work on Raw tonight as it's the last show of the year. I'm curious how my financials look compared to last year. I'm sure there's going to be a noticeable dip thanks to you-know-who. :lol:

OK, so I finished Raw and thus finished the whole year, and I didn't know the game gives you a top 100 workers list. I'll try to get that posted, too.

Top 100 Workers of 20240

1. Butch Fleming
2. Stone Walsh
3. Duke
4. Whiskey Murdock
5. Ben Dillinger
6. Doyle Hughes
7. Sonya Braddock
8. Rayne (Free Agent)
9. C.J.
10. Orlando Kincaid
11. King Kavovit
12. Quinten McDaniels
13. Kayla Hunter (Free Agent)
14. Paul Andrews (???)
15. Missy Brantley
16. Gavin Jones
17. Jason Sorola
18. Haven
19. Moses McKay
20. Arianna
21. Martyn LaSalle
22. Eclypse
23. Eric Silverman (Free Agent)
24. Jordan Demiras
25. Madison
26. Brandon Reigns (Come on! He's the Superstar of the Year!!!)
27. Drakken
28. Carl Deveroux (???)
29. Ryan Pattillo
30. Tania
31. Chris Collins
32. Naomi Bailey
33. Faith Connors (REALLY? She's at least top 20!!!)
34. Aaron Ramsey
35. Jenna Kyle (lower than Faith, huh?)
36. Miles Shawcross
37. Phoebe Hanson
38. Aphrodite
39. Shane Croft (Free Agent)
40. Hannah McCormick
41. Chris Carville (Free Agent)
42. Sandy Rochet (Free Agent)
43. Vivian Merrick
44. Cameron Harper
45. Roman Kensington (Free Agent)
46. Kyle Jacobs
47. Jake Connelly
48. Lyle Morris
49. Raymond Delaney
50. Stephan Q. Sterling
51. Marty Preston (Free Agent)
52. Daniel St. Croix
53. Noah Carmichael (He's a top 10 at least!)
54. Rick Bach (Free Agent)
55. Ozzy Mandias
56. Randy Ellis
57. Marcus Dean (Free Agent)
58. Lisa Benton (???)
59. Blaine Bellamey
60. Kerry Cemenko
61. Billie Padgett
62. Scott Andrews (Free Agent)
63. Kevin Daniels (Free Agent)
64. Rick Hilton
65. Sophie Waters
66. Hector Delgado (Free Agent)
67. Nathan Quinn
68. Mikhail Grigori (Free Agent)
69. Ziggy Styles
70. Xavier Cross (Come on...)
71. L.A. Xander
72. Emma Edwards
73. Kevin Martel (Free Agent)
74. Lzzy Ryd
75. Wu
76. Bonnie Beckham
77. Hugo
78. Romeo Valiente
79. Azazel
80. Robbie Greer
81. Simon Bennett
82. Sammy Brady
83. Ian Moore (???)
84. Michael Haywood
85. Tokyo Kid
86. Wrakk (That's right. The fucking WORLD CHAMPION gets put this far down.)
87. Nate Exley
88. Shawn Dangerson
89. Brooke
90. Mourn (Free Agent)
91. Joey Osbourne
92. Ainsley (who just fucking debuted a few weeks ago)
93. Emilio London
94. Julian Merrick
95. Jorn (Free Agent)
96. Melissa Gold (Free Agent)
97. Tom Foley
98. Fortune (Free Agent)
99. Chet Morris
100. Riott

That's right. MICHAEL GOD DAMN HOTBODY doesn't make the cut, but a shit ton of senior citizens working the indy circuit and conventions get in, not to mention all the fucking managers. I should use this for promo fuel if nothing else. :lol:

Fuck, even my Intercontinental Champion, Seth Von Kamp didn't get picked. :n:

End of the month (and year) notes:

BIRTHDAYS!!! Lisa Benton turns 51, Vic Gambler is 37, Vivian Merrick is 32, DeeJay Stokes is also 32 and seriously needs to be cut already, Bill Crockett is 24, Ainsley is 26, Zed Jones is 25, Doyle Hughes is 28, Jordan Demiras and Hugo are 27, Romeo Valiente is 38, and Billie Padgett is 41.

I'm praised for our increase in our money. Let's take a gander:

December finishes with a cool $12,964,840 which is an increase over the last two months. So in total I end the year with $202,799,040 in revenue, which is a drop from $258,283,155 in 2039. I wonder who I can blame for that.

Ecylpse, Sonya Braddock, Brandon Reigns, Carl Deveroux, and Doug Michaels all have contracts coming up for renewal.

I'm told Kevin Kleinrock is looking to start his own promotion down the road. Good luck with that.

Oh, and Lisa Benton plans on finally retiring at the end of the month. :(

So, yeah, nothing major...

To this day I've never been able to figure out how the game calculates the top 100 workers. I'd think it's gotta be some sort of algorithm between the worker stats, overness, charisma, all of the extra factors that could add value (Superstar Look, Fonz, etc) but I really don't know. Would think there's an element of randomness to it too.

Or maybe the game is telling you to book Duke vs. Stone Walsh in the main event of WrestleMania. I don't know.

Hotbody not making it is :lol: though. Consistently gets the most TV time, but now there's brilliant promo material to be had. He can launch an injunction.

Also I popped for Chris Carville in free agency. A name I remember from way back in the day!

I think the "over" stat is the biggest factor and then it just goes from there. A lot of those free agents are on the list of people one of my staff members keeps telling me I should hire, even though they're way past their prime and I already had them on my roster a long ass time ago.

But never let it be said that I don't make the effort to right a few wrongs. Let's see what the ACTUAL top twenty looks like, as composed by the person who knows my roster best...me.

1. Noah Carmichael
2. Brandon Reigns
3. Butch Fleming
4. Haven
5. Wrakk
6. Sonya Braddock
7. Seth Von Kamp
8. Michael Hotbody
9. Kyle Jacobs
10. Faith Connors
11. Jenna Kyle
12. Xavier Cross
13. Jordan Demiras
14. Naomi Bailey
15. Quinten McDaniels
16. Chris Collins
17. Ryan Pattillo
18. Moses McKay
19. Clubber Harris
20. Salvatore Scabbia

There! Doesn't that look more reflective of the promotion over this last year than whatever the fuck the game thinks? I can't wait to see what it does in 12 months.

Raw: December 31, 2040

It's the last show of the year! How are we going to close things out here tonight? The road to the Royal Rumble begins here!

TWENTY-MINUTE OPENING PROMO OF DOOM TIME!!! as the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk makes his way out to the ring. He's in a bragging mood and it's only appropriate considering last night. "And with one fell swoop, I end 2040 at the top of the mountain, the same way I would have the year prior had I not been gone. I told you all that I was going to right a ton of wrongs and I haven't run into anyone who can stop me from doing that. In just a few short hours, the new year begins and it's going to be an open canvas. A whole new landscape is ripe for a new masterpiece of destruction that I will craft with my bare hands! Now I know that in 4 weeks, we're all going to witness 30 men battle it out at the Royal Rumble, looking to earn that shot at the main event at WrestleMania. Understand that what you're fighting for is the right to be laying at my feet as I stand over you in victory at the grandest stage of them all! You want to talk about a countdown? These next few months will be a countdown to that moment of glory and nothing is getting in the way of that!"

Cue somebody who is going to try to get in the way of that as the music of Orlando Kincaid hits. This is...random? We know he's coming off a win last night at Bragging Rights, but maybe he's got a good reason to interrupt the WWE Unified World Champion so let's have a listen to what's on his mind as he enters the ring and addresses Wrakk. "Sorry to intrude, but I'm sitting there in the back and I'm listening to what you got to say when it hit me that it's a whole lot of nothing and I really don't give a damn about any of it. Now before you go getting all offended and mad about your feelings getting hurt, understand that's not the end of it as far as why I'm out here. See, you got yourself a nice shiny prize in your hands in the form of that Unified World Title. And as much fun I'd have slugging it out with 29 other guys in that Royal Rumble to get the chance to have a crack at that title, I haven't had much room for patience in my life as of late."

Wrakk takes this opportunity to interrupt. "Woah, woah, woah, you've got to be kidding me if you're interrupting my time just to ask for a title shot. You haven't done a damn thing to earn one."

Orlando continues. "See, actually that's where you're wrong. As you'll recall, a couple of weeks ago I was in this ring and I whipped some ass and I earned myself a contract that let me make whatever match I wanted for Bragging Rights."

"Yeah, we know. You made that 3-on-3 match last night. So what? What's that got to do with anything?"

"Well, as you know, I made a promise to turn over a new leaf in my career and get laser focused on some gold. I told Ryan Pattillo that I expected a title shot after Bragging Rights. Now, he didn't win, but the point still stands. I wanted a shot so I took the steps necessary to get a shot. You see, that contract let me make whatever match I wanted, with whoever I wanted to have involved, and whatever stipulations I wanted. So that match I made last night came with a little bonus clause: if my team came out on top, which they did, then I have the right to be the number one contender to the Unified World Title! And seeing as how this is the last night of the year and I'm supposed to be doing some celebrating anyway, I want to celebrate by beating your ass for that championship RIGHT NOW!"

The crowd cheers in approval as Wrakk makes gestures indicating that he's not down with that idea. Lisa Benton decides to intervene by coming out onto the stage and addressing the situation. "Wrakk, I hate to break it to you, but Orlando does have a case as far as being the number one contender to your title. As per the powers granted to him by the contract he won a few weeks back, his match at Bragging Rights could be made as he saw fit, with any additional riders. Orlando, unfortunately this doesn't mean that you're going to get your title shot at any time you want. It's not a Money in the Bank contract. So, no, this title match you're asking for isn't going to happen right now. IT'S GOING TO BE TONIGHT'S MAIN EVENT!" The crowd erupts in approval again as Wrakk throws an angry fit while Orlando makes his exit with an evil grin aimed at the champion. Looks like Lisa is serious about ending 2040 with a bang! We could start the new year with a new champion!

To the back we go as Nathan Quinn is with the Southern Belles who have demanded this time in order to address Leah and Bonnie Beckham. Nathan wants to ask them if they feel proud over the fact that they stole the Women's Tag Team Titles from his clients last night. Hannah and Bobbi Jo are not to be trifled with and they are not to be insulted by the likes of the Perfections and their fluke win! Hannah adds her own take, calling the name "Perfections" a joke because Leah and Bonnie are the furthest thing you can imagine from perfect. "And you don't want to believe that now, you'll want to reconsider when you see what we do to their faces the next time we get a crack at them!"

First Match: The Love Connection vs. The Wolves of Wall Street
And thus begins the movement to get the Love Connection as part of the tag title scene as I've got the match already in mind for the Rumble PPV. Is it wrong of me to want to load a card when the show is already going to have 30 guys as it is? Anyways, this match is the goods, and you can probably attribute the high rating to Aphrodite's loveliness...and her ass. Outside of her, the charisma from this match up isn't much to write home about. What you can write about is Aphrodite's ass. Oh, I guess I already did that. Well, I'll do it again as she puts it to good use by showing it off to Emilio London as he's got Caleb Greene down. Emilio is understandably hypnotized and Coleman comes in to snap him out of it by drop kicking him in the face, leaving him open to Caleb's Greene With Envy from the top to give the faces the win. The Love Connection celebrates and it's only now that we notice that the Future Foundation and Vivian Merrick are on the stage glaring at them. More players in the game? ****1/2, 93% overall.

Second Match: Neil Quint vs. Clayton North
The announcers bring up the fact that Neil has been on an amazing streak since debuting, as he has yet to suffer a loss. Well, no doubt he's looking to continue that run here. I'd say it's a good 1-2-punch to open with a solid tag match AND a balls-to-the-wall cruiserweight match. Neil is going to need the win here considering what's in store for him down the road...not to give anything away or anything. Clayton's partner, Corey Mattis, is on the apron giving the ref a piece of his mind, so Neil catapults Clayton into him after escaping a power bomb attempt. The collision sends Corey off the apron and sets Clayton up for the Quint-essential Top Rope Maneuver from Neil to give him the win and keep the streak going. ****1/4, 89% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favortie host, The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, The Lord of the Ladder and Conqueror of Fears, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! Looks like he wants to celebrate his victory over Gavin Jones last night in that tremendous TLC Match. "Now I know that it's going to be hard for the remainder of the locker room to look back on 2040 with pride, seeing as hardly any of them accomplished even a fraction of what I was able to pull off. But we can't let that be a downer tonight! All they have to do is a little introspection and come out better than before, ready to make changes in their lives and make resolutions for the new year. Now, I understand resolutions can be difficult to stick to, and I clearly see that you people are the type who give up on them in the middle of February. But now I'm here to act as your inspiration to reach that better tomorrow and an amazing new year! Yes, much like how I reached for this Cruiserweight Title in my match last night, it's all about overcoming your fears and facing down challenges with a stern resolve! Last night, I conquered the crippling anxiety of heights and the savage brutality of Gavin's ego and now I stand here in victory, poised and ready for the new year, celebrating what once was and what will be! Plus, at the stroke of midnight, you had better believe that I am going to be smooching it up with the bestest and hottest girl around, the lovely Luscious! Yes, she is incredibly lucky to have a man as successful as I am at her side. I can't name someone in the WWE right now with a track record like mine, but if he exists, I'll slap him down, too. 2041 is going to be better than ever in the camp of Michael Hotbody! More wins! More accolades! More spectacle! You know what? I can't wait for midnight. I need to do some celebrating right now! Luscious, please come on out here. We're going to ring in the new year a bit early and I need those lips of yours to help. So come on out, babe!"

Luscious makes her way out, looking overjoyed and excited, and joins Hotbody in the ring. Hotbody continues his spiel. "Oh, baby, this is a moment. This is a moment that I'm going to remember for decades and decades. Now I get that the new year is going to have its own share of hurdles, but I stand here the Lord of the Ladder and the Conqueror of Fears! So 2041, I say do your worst because right now, I'm going to get me some of the best! Let's count it down, baby, from 10! 10...9...8...7..." Hotbody stops when he realizes that the crowd is counting along with him. "No, no, no, this is only for Luscious and me. You don't get to do the countdown with us. You have your own countdown later, OK? Your only job is to observe and learn from my example and status, OK? No counting! Where were we? Right...6...5...4...3...NO COUNTING ALONG!!! 2...1...LAY ONE ON ME, BABY!!!" The two smooch in a heated fashion as the crowd boos. It's actually a pretty lengthy kiss with no end in sight until the music of Jake Connelly hits, heralding the arrival of the man himself and his clients. Well, they are involved in the next scheduled match and Jake looks irritated. Luscious and Hotbody remain oblivious and it takes Jake tapping on Hotbody's shoulder to break things up. Ethan and Jake signal that it's time for Hotbody and Luscious to scram and the Cruiserweight Champion takes the hint as the circumstances are not in his favor and he bails with Luscious in tow, looking upset as we go to break.

Third Match: Hugo and Chet Morris vs. Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper
Back from break with this match getting underway. Chet and Hugo are seething over what happened to them last night and poor Ethan Lang has to suffer from their double-teaming brutality. Harper plays cheerleader on the apron, holding up the framed photo in hopes of inspiring the crowd and Ethan. Connelly isn't sure what to make of Harper's behavior. Anyway, Ethan still manages to fight back in a great showing and eventually makes the tag to Harper. Harper and Chet are legal as the former does his best to get his team back on track. Hugo gets the idea to go after Connelly on the outside. Ethan summons enough energy to dive through the ropes to intercept him, catching the ref's attention long enough for Chet to boot Harper in the nuts. Harper is down and at Chet's mercy, but LYLE MORRIS IS HERE!!! He runs in and tackles Chet again like he did last night, but the ref has turned back around at this point and sees the interference and calls for the bell. That's going to be a DQ win for Chet and Hugo, but that's a minute detail in all of this as Lyle continues to go to town on Chet's face. Hugo drags Chet out, bailing him out again. Lyle wants to pursue, but by this point, Harper has recovered and is upset as all hell over what Lyle did. He spins Lyle around so that they're face-to-face and Harper gives him a piece of his mind. Lyle really isn't in the mood for this shit and responds by slapping the taste out of Harper's mouth, knocking him down. Lyle takes his leave, no doubt in search of Chet. Well, that was a circus to say the least. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Fourth Match: Leah vs. Bobbi Jo
The feud MUST CONTINUE!!! Bobbi is naturally still upset over her team no longer being the champions and her actions here in this match reflect that. We get a hard-hitting affair from these two as we're likely to see more of this in the inevitable rematch down the line. They slug it out on the outside as the ref is delivering his count to the two women. After being knocked down on the ground, both women fight their way up. Leah starts to climb into the ring but Bobbi grabs her legs and tries to pull Leah. Leah clings on for dear life and it's a struggle. Ultimately, Leah kicks Bobbi away, sending her into the announce table. Leah rolls back into the ring and the ref continues his count to 10 as Bobbi is still on the outside and that's going to give the win to Leah. Like it was mentioned earlier, the feud will be continuing and Hannah McCormick decides to come in afterwards from behind Leah and deck her in the back of the head with her custom mic. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Once more to the back as Madison is on the phone, walking down a hallway. She eventually comes across Moses McKay who snatches the phone out of her hand and tells the person on the other end that she'll call back and hangs up. Madison tries taking the phone back but Moses keeps it away from her. He tells her that there are more important issues at hand. Like the fact that the Royal Effect should be the Tag Team Champions right now. "Now, I don't particularly care about what you were hashing out right now, but I am expecting you to answer me this. What exactly do you plan to do about this issue? You owe us."

Madison stands defiant. "I, and especially Blaine and Robbie, don't owe you a damn thing. You want another go at the titles? Go earn it! Now give me back my damn phone."

Moses merely sneers, then responds by grabbing Madison by the throat, threatening to shove the phone down her throat. Blaine Bellamey happens to come around the corner and sees what's happening and immediately jumps on Moses, tackling him to the ground. We got ourselves a fight on our hands! Eventually enough officials come in to separate the two as Moses makes his retreat and Blaine goes to Madison's aide. Looks like more tag team issues that need to be resolved.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Jason Sorola, no doubt because he wants to explain himself for what he did last night in the main event. "Now, enough time has passed since Bragging Rights to where I've heard all the talk and all the speculation. Everyone asking the question as to why I did what I did. The popular theory that's being floated around is that I'm just jealous. Jealous over what the rest of my former colleagues have managed to achieve without me. Well, you know what? So what if I am? I'm human! I have feelings, just like all of you! You can't sit there and try to act like you're above me! I can guarantee that every single one of you people has felt like I have! You're jealous of your co-workers who get the promotions you think you deserve! You're jealous of your neighbors; they've got a better house or a fancier car in their driveway! Some of you probably came here alone and are looking at all these couples and you're angry and jealous, wishing you had what they have! DON'T JUDGE ME!!! You don't have that right! Here's what separates me from the rest of you: I actually do deserve what I'm after. You don't deserve a promotion, you're probably terrible at your job and take home supplies and food from the break room! You don't deserve a better house, you'd probably just turn it into a hovel like you already live in! You don't deserve love, you're freaking pathetic! Me, on the other hand? I've always been the most talented, especially compared to the rest of the Hunters! So when I have to sit there in the back, the victim of circumstance, and I have to watch losers like Ryan Pattillo get an opportunity of a lifetime, one that he doesn't deserve, you think I was just going to hold my tongue and carry on like it doesn't bother me? Ryan, you were a terrible leader, and you turned into a terrible friend. Karma has made its way to the doorstep of all of you guys. It bit Gavin Jones in the ass when he tried to win the Cruiserweight Title, something that I was supposed to win for myself. It definitely came and bit Ryan in the ass when that Unified World Title got snatched from his hands. And I can assure you that there's more karma to come!"

With that declaration, the music of Michael Haywood hits, interrupting Jason's tirade. Michael, who is also a former teammate of Jason's, makes his way down to the ring defiantly and joins Jason to confront him over what he's saying. "Now, Jason, I hope you understand that I'm not about to fight the battles of Ryan or Gavin. They're big boys and they understood what was in store for them when it came time for us to go our separate ways. But here you, basically lumping me together with them and your tirade about them. Frustrations are frustrations, and we all deal with them in our own way. You seem to be choosing to deal with them by whining and taking joy in what you're calling 'karma'."

"Yeah, what about it, Michael?" Jason asks.

"Well, you know me, Jason. I like being forewarned and prepared. So, with you running down the list of people you think deserve your little karma or whatever, I just have to ask, is there any karma coming my way?" Michael asks while leaning in towards Jason in an aggressive fashion. "I mean, by all means, Jason, don't let me stand in your way of this indignation you've got going on here. Certainly I must've wronged you in some fashion. I just have to know. Am I due for some of that karma?"

Jason composes himself and responds with a demeaning tone. "Actually, you know something, Michael? You're not worth it. And you never were. I know what you're trying to do here. You want to goad me. Well, you can go puff your chest somewhere else. I've got better things to do." With that, Jason tucks his tail and rolls out of the ring, leaving Michael to continue to glare at him as he takes his leave. Surely Jason can't be scared, no?

Fifth Match: Clubber Harris and Seth Von Kamp vs. Zed Jones and Chris Collins
So many feuds that need to continue. We're told that there was some sort of interaction in the back with Luscious and Jake Connelly, but we don't have all the details right now. Nevertheless, this match is the goods, loaded with heat on both sides. No doubt we'll be getting another one-on-one round between Zed and Harris down the line. The match comes down to Harris and Collins as the legal men, while Zed and Seth fight on the outside. Luscious tries sneaking up behind Seth with the Intercontinental Title belt, but he turns around and catches her in the act. He starts going after her as she backs up. Zed goes on the attack, shoving Seth from behind, sending him into the ring post. The ref checks on Seth as Zed rolls back into the ring. Luscious slides the belt to Zed and he clobbers Harris in the back of the head as he's setting Collins up for Club Pain. Collins hits the Fall From Heaven and the ref turns to see the pin attempt and he counts the fall to award the win to the heels. What a brawl. ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Unified World Title
Wrakk (c) vs. Orlando Kincaid
Let's end the year with some awesome shall we. Wrakk expresses his outrage over the situation, calling it unfair that he hasn't had time to prepare for something like this, not to mention that he doesn't think Kincaid has really earned this match. Orlando fires back, saying that there are three men out there that can point to the ass kicking they got last night as evidence that he damn sure deserves this match. Not to mention the ass kicking that Wrakk is going to get right now. Orlando says it's nothing personal. It's just a case of wrong place, wrong time for Wrakk. This is simply business. What's definitely personal and what's definitely something that gives Orlando pleasure, is beating the piss out of a sorry son of a bitch like Quinten McDaniels. Orlando hopes he's watching because this is a moment Orlando's going to throw in Quinten's face. With those pleasantries out of the way, this match certainly delivers, all things considered. I mean, there's no real history here, plus it's so weird when you consider Orlando was a heel not too long ago, and here he is, closing out the year IN THE MAIN EVENT FOR THE FUCKING TITLE. I guess one good angle is all he really needed. Well, it's fun all around. Of course, the fun just has to get ruined as Orlando has Wrakk in a vulnerable state and it looks like he's about to close in on a victory but Quinten McDaniels has to fuck it all up by running in and tackling Orlando from behind. The ref is going to call for the bell and Wrakk is going to retain, but the real story here is Quinten going to town on Orlando. Wrakk gets the hell out of here with his championship as Orlando continues to suffer an assault from McDaniels. Quinten ultimately decides to put an exclamation point on this attack by hoisting up Orlando and laying him out with the Great Depression. We go off the air as our final image of 2040 is Quinten McDaniels standing over a fallen Orlando Kincaid. What's next for these two? *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 91%

Up next: THE NEW YEAR BEGINS ON SUPERSTARS!!!

Forget about some other end of the year notes, as I've got a few more NXT guys thinking they're the shit and ready to come up to the main roster. Two of them are just going to have to be content with being managers because, Jesus Christ, they suck donkey dong in other departments. The only question is whether or not they fit in right now.

What simulators are you guys using for these

I'm still rocking 4.2 of EWR, having converted all my stuff from 3.0.

Yeah EWR 4.2 is usually what I use but I'm very close to finally trying Pro Wrestling Sim.

EWR 4.2 is fun but incredibly simplified and after 20+ years it's easy for me to get burnout quickly. TEW I find to be far too immersive.

PWS it sounds like is somewhere in the middle so I'm keen to try it, just gotta find the time.

The year of Hotbody comes to a fitting conclusion. After tons and tons of faces interrupting him all year, he gets to make out with his woman and rub everyone's noses in it after all of that. Also him telling crowds to stop counting is such brilliant shit too.

A nice way to close out the year. A surprise title match to finish out the year is a cool touch, furthers Kincaid's business along while also making him look kinda brilliant for getting that loophole put into his match stipulation.

Curious to see how (or if) Lisa Benton gets any sort of a proper write-off. Does she just retire with dignity, bequeathing the position along the way? Does somebody force her out? Does Michael Hotbody become the Supreme General Manager of all of WWE in addition to his many other accolades? Stay tuned!

There will certainly be a degree of dignity to Lisa's departure. Counting her training and developmental time, she's essentially been with me for 30 years, so I figure a tenure like that deserves a nice send-off. Well, as nice as it can get with Hotbody around. It's most definitely going to suck without her, but it's been long enough. Her replacement, however, is up in the air as I'm going back and forth between two options. There's one really obvious choice that would certainly be fitting.

Finished booking Superstars and Wrakk is still on my ass about wanting to work a match with Duke. :|

30 years in-game is a pretty wild tenure, to say the least you got your money's worth out of her. Thankfully EWR 4.2 lets you assign any non-wrestler as an authority figure and I always appreciated the workaround of allowing wrestlers and managers to be authority figures too provided they were set up with the gimmick. Always helped for simulating situations like Commissioner Regal back in the day.

So when I booked the Rumble in EWR I tended to follow something similar to what WWE did in real life, I'd have the title challenger be someone unexpected who wouldn't normally be bought in a title program, therefore freeing more stars up for the Rumble match.

I feel like I'd totally just do a "first name out of this tumbler gets a PPV title match instead of having to be in the Rumble" deal and that would be my excuse to get a random like Duke an opportunity

Time to earn your year-end rating bitch

Nah, I've got an idea as to how to get to a match involving Wrakk and Duke for SmackDown!. It'll be a tad contrived, but hopefully it gets Wrakk off my ass. What's he got to complain about? He's the fucking WORLD CHAMPION!

I've already got my pick for who he'll face for the Rumble event. I think it's the right balance between "not a mega star" and "it's not beyond the realm of possibility this guy could win". Although I am a bit miffed that it's another dude who didn't make the cut for the top 100 for what I'm paying him.

I wish the game could let you book the order of entry for the Rumble, or at the very least the first two guys along with who you want the last two guys to be.

Yeah that's one way in which the other sim games give you more control. You can pick order of entry, specific eliminations, or anything like that.

Reading EWR Rumble write ups is funny because they'll have like 25 guys in the ring before an elimination.

It also doesn't let you do draws like the '94 Rumble. Although, I can understand that as with something like this, you'd want just one winner. I'm still on board with the idea of number 30 winning the whole thing, but only because the other 29 have already eliminated each other.

LOL, did a quick merchandise check again and not only is fucking Ethan Lang still rocking the top ten, four of the spots on there are taken by women, including Lisa. :lol: WTF is wrong with this thing?

Hey now! That “Thank You Lisa” retirement shirt deserves to be a best seller!

Her finisher is a submission hold called "Get Bent" and I can imagine something like that on a T-shirt would go over well with the teenagers...and maybe some of the trans community.

I've been ping-ponging in my head over whether or not I should debut some of the new guys right now. Things are pretty packed right now as it is, don't you think? Plus, I already have the Rumble card set. I suppose I could use them as a back up if any injuries come around.

It's tricky because once they decide they want out of developmental they simply won't get any better - and keeping there only serves to lessen morale.

So for me it's always just kinda a sink or swim thing. I'll give you a chance unless your stats are really trash. But if you're not bringing in good numbers, you're cut.

Having a guy or two debut in the Rumble is a pretty convenient excuse to get some new faces in the roster even if they slowly get integrated into the main shows after.

Kudos to you for not returning to the brand split roots, I'd have probably gone with a 3-way split by now with this many talented guys and gals to juggle.

Talent-wise, they're really good, but lacking in the charisma department. I do have a manager to solve that problem, but like I said, I've got virtually everybody involved in something, the Rumble is coming up, and WrestleMania needs to be stacked with the big names. I might have to hold out until after then.

Fuck, I need to get back to this. Been hella distracted as of late, plus I've been catching up on Lower Decks. Don't ask me why. I don't even like Star Trek. :|

Superstars: January 3, 2041

It's the first show of the new year! Let's do this!!!

Opening Match: Neil Quint vs. Ziggy Styles
Ziggy gets on the mic and wants to be the first to welcome us all to the new year. "How appropriate it is that I, the great Ziggy Styles, am selected to be part of the first match of 2041! It's a time for new beginnings and reflecting on what was and seeing where you can improve in your lives! Even I am capable of benefitting from a bit of soul searching. And while last week did not produce the intended outcome I had in mind, it taught me a lot. I can be doing so much more, working so much harder to bring you positivity you all need! It's no longer just about the wrestlers in the back or the fans of the WWE. The whole world needs to learn to get Ziggy with it! Put your faith in me and I can be the rock you lean on and the source of strength you need to stick to your resolutions! It begins with a small step, one that I will take right now! So come on out here, Neil!" Neil Quint does indeed come out, guns blazing. The man's been on a tremendous roll. That's bound to lead to something good for him, no? I might as well make the first match of the year something of high quality. The match comes to an end when Quint flips out of a belly-to-back suplex from Ziggy and lands on his feet. He drop kicks Ziggy from behind, sending him face first into the turnbuckle, knocking him silly and he collapses to the ground, leaving him vulnerable to the Quintessential Top Rope Manuever from...uh...the top, from Neil to keep the streak alive. ****1/2, 91% overall.

We're told that there are more details surrounding the confrontation between Luscious and Jake Connelly that was mentioned on Raw. And there's even video! Let's see what happened.

We're shown Jake Connelly making his way down a hall, presumably to meet up with his clients. Luscious is seen trying to catch up with him and she confronts him over what happened with Hotbody's celebration. "Hey, who the hell do you think you are? That was our moment out there! You have no idea how mad you made Michael! That was a beautiful moment between two people who have been through hell and back and wanted to enjoy just a bit of satisfaction and joy! I know you're just a miserable old man, Jake, but you don't get to just throw your weight around anymore!"

Jake Connelly looks like he's not in the mood to be dealing with this, but nonetheless responds. "Look, miss, we all have better things to do than watch a round of tonsil hockey. If you or your boy have got a problem with that, you're welcome to do something about it."

"Oh, we most definitely have a problem with it! I hope your guys are ready to pay the price for this! I want them to show up on Superstars and they can deal with the wrath of Galino & Farnes! How about that?"

"Fine. Ethan and Cameron will absolutely be there. After what happened tonight, they could use a chance to get out some aggression."

We're back to present time as that little exchange brings us to...

Second Match: Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper vs. Galino & Farnes
Well, before this gets underway we're shown a video of the locker room where Cameron approaches Jake Connelly, apparently upset over this match. Jake asks what the problem is. "You know what the problem is. I want Lyle Morris tonight! He insulted me, hell, he insulted ALL of us with what he did on Raw. I had that match in the bag and he wants to come on down and ruin things? No, this is BS. I don't see why we need to have this match tonight."

Connelly looks down and takes a deep breath before responding in a pretty harsh tone. "We're having this match because I put it together, OK? If you wanted Lyle so badly, maybe instead of going off on your own to pout on Monday, you could've talked to me first and I could've tried to get you that match. Instead, this is where we are. It's not the match you wanted, but I still expect you to take it just seriously as any other. Ethan expects you to take it seriously, too. Do you understand?"

Cameron looks a bit upset, but ultimately he relents and apologizes. "You know, you're right. You're right and I'm sorry. I've been getting myself all tangled in a frenzy these past few weeks, I don't what it is. I'm gonna work on that and I'm going to make this match worth your while." And with that Cameron turns around to make his way to the ring...but not before grabbing the framed photo he gave Jake.

So the match begins and it's just funny how all of Hotbody's crew manages to piss off everyone in the locker room. It's a good outing, but despite what Cameron told Jake earlier, he still doesn't seem to be too keen on spending a lot of time in the match, preferring to continue playing cheerleader with the framed picture. Things come to a head when Ethan makes his own comeback after Galino & Farnes mess up SERIOUS INQUIRIES! Farnes gets dumped but Galino goes on the assault from behind and tries whipping Lang into the ropes for something, but it's reversed and Galino collides with Harper still on the apron, still with his attention to the crowd. Harper goes off the apron and Lang catches Galino off the rebound in a small package and that's going to be enough for a surprise upset from Lang. Harper throws a fit but Connelly points out the victory and that seems to somewhat satisfy him. ****1/2, 92% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as we're going to get Kyle Jacobs out here to join us. We haven't seen him since his big win over Xavier Cross on the last SmackDown!. What's he got to say this time around? "Here we are finally kicking off the new year. It's time for us to get started on those resolutions we made as that clock struck midnight a few days ago. I made a few myself and while I'm going to keep some of those to myself, they're kind of embarrassing, there is a big one that have no problem sharing, not just with all of you, but with the entire locker room. Despite my last name, my one overarching goal is to have my own legacy in this business, separate from what my uncle and my father accomplished. The thing about that, though, is that would mean accomplishing things that neither man ever did during their career. I've taken major steps towards that goal, including capturing the Intercontinental Title, but there's an even bigger step that needs to be approached and overcome. Having a substantial, long-lasting legacy just isn't complete unless you're one of the lucky few to be standing in victory at the end of the main event of WrestleMania. So I'm making the move right now and letting you all know what's up. This is my declaration that I will be entering the Royal Rumble! Out of a pool of 30, there will be only one, and I know how to buck the odds better than anyone. Another WrestleMania moments awaits me when I head into that main event and walk out with gold one more time, only now it's for the biggest prize at the county fair. I will make the WWE Unified World Title part of the Jacobs legacy, and it begins at the Rumble!"

Now this can't just be the WWE without someone else coming on out to trade words. Here comes Chris Collins out from the back and he joins Kyle in the ring to share his thoughts. "Kyle, Kyle, Kyle; you know, people like you make me sick. You may be second generation like I am, but you fall into the category of people who want to have it both ways. You want to carve out your own piece of history, to leave behind a memorable legacy you can call your own. The problem, though, is that you can't bring yourself to stop fawning over those who came before you. You still want to praise them and ask everyone to still hold them in such high esteem. Well, Kyle, answer me this: how do you expect anyone to remember the things you do when you don't do a damn thing to make them forget about what your uncle and dad did? You don't have it in you to completely separate yourself from them. Now me, on the other, I did what was right and I made sure that right from the get-go, the story of Chris Collins was going to be mine and mine alone. I annihilated my own father because it was necessary! It's what needed to be done and I had the stomach for it! And just look at how far I've come without hitching my wagon to him! I've become my own man. I can look at myself in the mirror with a sense of pride. And I hope you and anyone else back there watching understands that I'm not done. I'm still gunning for that top spot once again and I'm going to be even better than ever in that role. You see, not only am I also announcing my participation in the Royal Rumble, I'm am also DEMANDING that Seth Von Kamp man up and give me another shot at the Intercontinental Title, one that I deserve! I will walk into that Rumble with that Intercontinental Title in my name and then I'm going to WrestleMania where I'll walk out with all the gold, something none of our seniors could ever hope to accomplish. Certainly something YOU could never accomplish!"

Kyle is keen on firing back and does so. "I'll say this much about my father and uncle. While they most certainly didn't achieve what you have, they can at least sit back in retirement with pride knowing that they'll carry way more respect and character than you ever will. Your own father, despite everything you've ever said about him and did to him, will always be on that high pedestal that you wish you could reach because he was actually a man about things. We don't choose the circumstances of our birth, and, yeah, it can be a pain with the family I was born into, but they paved the way for me and I'll never forget that! Isn't it about time you grew the hell up, Chris?!?"

Chris Collins also looks keen on firing back. "YOU DON'T GET TO GIVE ME LIP, BOY! I grew up a long time ago when I had to become the man of the house! I had to be the one keeping things together because "Daddy" wanted to be here in front of these undeserving slack-jawed nobodies! Forget your lineage. You have a LOOOOOOOONG way to go before you even measure up to ME! All the stories and coaching you got from your old man and your uncle, I assure you didn't get you ready for facing someone like me. I'll be looking to make a statement come Rumble time, and you're going to understand it the hard way, when you're out on your ass on that floor after I toss you and your stupidity out of this ring! Use this time up until that night to prepare yourself for failure, because while we're both second generation, I got to where I'm at because the real teacher was me, while you're still clinging to the scraps you got from what came before you. But don't you worry, Kyle. At the Rumble, I'm going to be your daddy."

With that last line of trash talk Kyle gets all righteous and shit and decides to slap the taste out of the mouth of Collins. Collins reels back, then looks back at Kyle with a fury in his eye, but ultimately decides to call it a night by rolling out of the ring, insulted with this whole matter. He yells a few choice words at Kyle, stuff along the lines of "You'll see". How is this going to go down between these two second generation stars?

Third Match: Hannah McCormick vs. Ainsley
Debra Phillips is on commentary continuing to run down and bad mouth Ainsley. She talks about how it's every woman for herself once they come onto the scene here in the WWE. She and Ainsley may have trained together, but it's not possible for the two of them to have the same kind of career. Debra just pulled the trigger first because she knows she's got what it takes to survive in the wasteland on her own. Well, that discussion continues as the match goes on. Hannah is extra salty coming off that loss at Bragging Rights and no longer being a champion. Ainsley has to play underdog here, as Hannah is the bigger star and the vet (relatively) in this situation, but she hangs tough regardless. It comes to an end when Ainsley is knocked off the apron and hits the announce table on the way down. Hannah tries going for the kill, but the ref tries holding her back so the count can begin. Ainsley tries getting back up and Debra is in her face. They trade a few choice words, but Ainsley decides to get back to business and turns to go back to the ring. This opens the door for Debra to sneak up behind her and shove her into the ring post and then back into the ring. Hannah capitalizes with an Oklahoma Roll for the cheap pin victory. Neither she nor Debra have time to gloat as Leah of the Perfections comes running down to get her some of Hannah for retribution. Hannah bails as Leah gives chase and no doubt there's going to be more to come from that department. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fourth Match: Alexander Piero vs. Lonny Richards
Nothing really major happening here. Piero needs to get put back on track as that loss to Collins was a major detour for him. We need as many possible winners for the Rumble as possible to make things exciting. Madison cheers her man on as he's able to catch Lonny coming off the top into a power slam and that sets things up for him to finish it off with the Flashpoint to give him the win. ****1/2, 92% overall.

More In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as Quinten McDaniels comes out to the ring, fresh off of screwing Orlando Kincaid in the Unified Title match on Raw. He gets on the mic and tells us that he's here to draw the line between himself and Orlando Kincaid. "Actually, it's more of a reinforcement of the line that Orlando himself drew when he decided to be selfish and hostile towards me! And all of it was made even worse when he decided to think that he deserved the Unified World Title. Orlando, I will be absolutely damned if a traitor like you EVER becomes world champion before I do! I've given my all to my career and to this company. I have building a path that broke free from the likes of Haven and Butch Fleming and Noah Carmichael and ESPECIALLY YOU! All of that work and sacrifice isn't going to go to waste just so I can sit and watch you try to get ahead of me. I am your superior and if refusing to joing up with me wasn't a slap in the face, Orlando, you better believe that I'm taking your little stunt on Monday VERY personal! Pal, in case you haven't been paying attention, you're dealing with the man who won last year's Royal Rumble and don't kid yourself thinking that I can't do it again because I'll gladly toss you out on your ass and leave you behind like the footnote that you are and you can watch me take that Unified World Title at WrestleMania. I hope it stings then like it stung on Raw when you came to senses after that beat down I gave you and it hit you like a ton of bricks that you didn't get your moment in the spotlight! I warned you, Orlando, that you were signing your death warrant by being my enemy. Well here's the line! You're welcome to cross it if you like, but know that even if you don't have the guts to do it yourself, I'll do the crossing on my own and end you like I'll end Haven. And with those two pieces off my board, I can finally move on! So let it be known right here and now, that I announce my participation in this year's Royal Rumble and I'm looking for a repeat. I dare anyone to just to throw me over that top rope!"

Cue someone who might try to throw Quinten over that top rope as Orlando Kincaid's music hits and the man himself makes his way out with determination in his eye. He's looking pissed as all hell, but to Quinten's credit he's not backing down and demands Orlando get in the ring with him. Orlando obliges and we have ourselves a brawl! It goes back and forth, eventually ending up outside after a tackle from Orlando sends them both over the top rope. Orlando looks to press the advantage, but Quinten goes low and sends Orlando into the steel steps. He sets Orlando up by draping him face down across the lower half of the steps and then puts an exclamation point on it by slamming the top half on top of Orlando. Quinten takes his leave with a glint of satisfaction in his eye as this is twice now that Orlando has been humiliated by his hand.

Fifth Match: Ozzy Mandias and The Royal Effect vs. Jordan Demiras and The Wyldhearts
This will be fun, I'm sure. Both Moses and Kavovit reiterate their desire, their NEED, to have another go at the Wyldhearts and the Unified Tag Team Titles. Their path to winning a repeat Tag Team of the Year Slammy starts by destroying the pretenders to the throne who think they can run and hide. Madison is with her boys, pulling double duty tonight, and she fires back that neither Blaine or Robbie are hiding. They're not that hard to find because they're the guys with the big shiny belts that mark them as the best tag team going on in the WWE today. The Royal Effect may have burned way too bright, too soon, and for too short a time, and trying to snuff out the Wyldhearts isn't going to make it any better. So I would imagine this 6-man is just all over the place. It comes down to Kavovit and Jordan as the legal men. Jordan stalks Kavovi as he tries to get in position for an Axe Kick to finish things off. Ozzy comes charging at Jordan, though, but Jordan is quick to the draw and hangs Ozzy on the middle rope via a drop toe hold. Moses discreetly hands Ozzy one of the Slammys. Jordan goes over to try to get him some more of Ozzy while Kavovit has the ref distracted. Ozzy turns around, surprising Jordan with a shot across the forehead with the Slammy and Kavovit immediately capitalizes with a quick schoolboy on Jordan and that's going to give the heels the cheap victory. *****, 94% overall.

To the back we go as Dusk wants to cut a promo from whatever dark recesses she's hanging around. Her target for her vitriol is Jenna Kyle as she calls the Wonder From Down Under a sad excuse for a competitor as she failed to capture the Women's Title at Bragging Rights. She asks Jenna to consider the ramifications of such a colossal failure. If Jenna couldn't rise to the challenge and conquer Sonya Braddock, then the little Barbie doll doesn't have a prayer should she ever cross Dusk's path. "You can't deny what you witnessed with your own eyes when your friend, Faith, was swallowed whole by the darkness at my disposal. You can dig down deep as hard as you want, but eventually you can't dig anymore and all that's left is a void inside of you. And you fear that void, Jenna. People like you always do. But not to worry. It'll be replaced by an even more paralyzing and consuming fear...ME!"

Sixth Match: Eddy Clash vs. Xavier Cross
This is probably Eddy's biggest test to date as we've got a multiple-time world champion in Cross here. It's a good showcase for both guys as Cross has to use his smarts and experience to overcome the size difference. They tumble to the outside when Eddy gives Cross the Cactus Clothesline. Clash tosses Cross back in as the count is on. The ref checks on Cross as Eddy tries getting back in the ring. But what's this? Someone is grabbing Eddy's leg from under the apron! Eddy can't get back in as he struggles to break the grip. The count reaches 10, though, so it's going to be a win for Cross. Eddy reaches down and tries to pull the person out from under the ring. IT'S HUGO! Oh, boy, it's hoss-on-hoss time. Looks like these two didn't get enough of each other at Bragging Rights. They brawl up the stage and to the back as we get more and more people out to try to get things calmed down. ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Salvatore Scabbia and Ronnie Costello vs. The Academy
Let's try this without the ladies. Brooke gets on the mic as she declares that she wants to lay down the law as she agrees that a new year is all about new opportunities. She says that every belt and person holding them in the WWE is now on notice. She and her camp are reinvigorated and are on the hunt. It's high time that her crew get over all of these petty distractions and get back to what they're the best at, and that's being on top. With that said, she is proud to announce that both Salvatore and Ronnie will be participating in the Royal Rumble. Now is the time for the people under her watch to get their rightful dues, and it starts with putting the Academy in the rearview mirror! Well, with that out of the way, let's have ourselves an awesome main event. I suppose this would be kind of a blow off for this whole angle. I have no idea how the crowd reactions can be high for all of this considering the charisma scores for everyone, excluding the managers. Maybe they just love the ring work that much. Well, it is a strong main event in that department. We close things out with Brooke putting Ronnie's foot on the bottom rope to break up a pinfall attempt from Randy Ellis after hitting Today's Lesson. Sophie Waters gives chase in protest of this as Randy argues with the ref. Ronnie makes his way over to his corner and slumps there. Randy goes over to grab him but Scabbia makes a blind tag. Justin comes in to help with a double team on Ronnie as the Academy whips him into the ropes. Scabbia nails them both from behind and then tosses Mitchell as Ronnie grabs the ropes to stop himself. Randy is alone and he gets locked in the Omerta from Scabbia and he passes out to give the win to Scabbia and Ronnie. Brooke may be onto something with what she said earlier. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

Nice to see things back up and running! The Rumble season is always a fun one to book because I lay out any remaining WrestleMania plans aside from the World Title match and always work out fun ways to integrate them into the Rumble match itself, even if most of it is just happening in my imagination.

And yeah I've (once again) dropped the ball :lol: it's been a busy last few months with the girlfriend moving in and everything. Also as tends to be the case AEW goes through so many real-life changes every time I take a break it's like I'm stepping back into the dark ages revisiting a game from only a mere few months ago

Maybe I should go back to 2022 and finish the Fire Pro tournament before TPWW actually closes for good, which sadly I feel like might be on the table next year

SmackDown!: January 4, 2041

TWENTY-MINUTE OPENING PROMO OF DOOM TIME!!!!111 as the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk makes his way out to the ring to address the people. "With 2040 behind us, I start the new year still the WWE Unified World Champion! Not even treachery like what Orlando Kincaid tried to pull on Raw can stop me from being the most dominating champion in the WWE. You don't luck your way into wearing this title. You get here because you deserve it, and thus far, I have proven that I alone deserve it. The sting of an entire year's absence still resonates, and I'm looking to make sure that every sad sack of crap that steps in the ring with me while I'm champion feels that same pain. You've been missing out on some sweet, sweet punishment and it's high time that it started catching up with you. So by all means, to the eager thirty men who want to slug it out in a few weeks in that Rumble, do what you can and summon whatever you can to get you to that main event spot at WrestleMania. That's going to be my magnum opus. A masterpiece of destruction...and despair."

Who should interrupt the proceedings but The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, The Lord of the Ladder and Conqueror of Fears, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! This is certainly random, but certainly the Cruiserweight Champion has a reason to be out here joining Wrakk. Let's see what he's got to say.

"Wrakk, buddy, I'm so glad you're out here because I often feel at times that I'm alone in my struggle as a champion. It's true that I have the love of a good woman at my side, but there's that crippling void of not getting enough respect from all of the jealous challengers to my throne. But it's good to know that we feel each other's pain and that we can find a kindred spirit in one another. I, too, am deserving of this championship despite all the naysayers and we winners have to stick together. I mean, I don't need to remind you all that I myself am a winner of a Royal Rumble! That's right, I won one last year and that was the catalyst that put me on the path that I'm on right now! In fact, I think I have it in me to do it again, only this time I can head to the main event of WrestleMania and I can give you, Wrakk, that top level opponent that you deserve. Champion vs. champion, the way it should be for an event like this! Now, I understand that you may have your eyes set on someone else for the role, but know that I would treat you with all of the respect that you deserve because I know you'd do the same for me, a fellow champion and a fellow winner."

Wrakk has been looking annoyed during all of Hotbody's spiel and looks to give the Cruiserweight Champion an earful, but who should interrupt now but Duke and Drakken, the Wasteland! This has certainly been an odd way to start the show. Let's hear what these two have to say.

Drakken has the mic and he calls out both Wrakk and Hotbody for wasting time out here. Drakken points out how the two of them have done more talking than actual fighting in their respective reigns as champions. Duke gets on the mic and says that he's all for the new opportunities that a new year can bring and it would be a swell idea for both Wrakk and Hotbody to put their money where their mouths are right here and now. The Wasteland weren't planning on a fight tonight, but that doesn't mean there can't be one. Drakken throws down the gauntlet by challenging the two champions to a tag match right now.

Wrakk merely smirks, but Hotbody gets on his mic and asks the Wasteland who the hell they think they are. "Of course Wrakk is willing to throw down! He'll happily take you on and as his buddy and champion-in-arms, even though I'm still a bit tired from all of that New Year's physical celebration, it's my duty to back him up in his efforts tonight in teaching you two some respect! Let's get a ref out here right now!" Wrakk is obviously befuddled and confused over this, but apparently this is going to be an official match as a ref does indeed come down and the Wasteland follow suit. And so we get....

First Match: The Wasteland vs. Wrakk and The Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, The Lord of the Ladder and Conqueror of Fears, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody
Hah, bet you didn't think I'd find a way to do Wrakk and Duke, did you? Well, I'm nothing if not chaotic and willing to try something new and off the wall. Speaking of which, Wrakk does the heavy lifting here and has the Wasteland as his personal crash dummies as Hotbody is in the corner cheering him on. Hotbody eventually tags in when it looks like Duke is all but paste. Drakken makes a comeback and gets the tag in to Drakken and now Hotbody has to experience some two-on-one pain. Drakken eventually gets the bright idea to drop kick Wrakk off the apron. Hotbody is in serious trouble as he gets further punishment and eventually the Wasteland get him set up for the Toxic Kiss. Wrakk comes back in, however, and plasters Duke with a clothesline. Drakken turns away from Hotbody as this gets his attention and the ref tries getting Wrakk out of the ring. Meanwhile, Luscious has run down to ringside and slides Hotbody a Slammy award. Drakken turns his attention back to Hotbody, who offers him a close up look at his prestigious award. Drakken, in shame that he hasn't won such an achievement, goes down to the mat and Hotbody quickly covers him and that's going to be enough to get the pic for the heels. *****, 97% overall.

I mean, hot damn!

To the back we go as standing by is the WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp. He's asked about the proposed rematch for the title that Chris Collins brought up last night on Superstars. "You know, I'm guessing Chris Collins and I have two very different definitions for 'deserve'. I thought me beating him at Bragging Rights would have put an end to this whole matter. But you know what? I get where he's coming from. I remember for the longest time believing that I deserved accolades like this Intercontinental Title right here. And even though I stepped on a lot of rakes along the way and got splattered against a bunch of walls in my path, I still believed that I deserved better. So, hey, points for persistance, Chris! But until you get this belt off of me, that's all you'll have and it's all you're getting. I'll grant him another match for the title, this Monday on Raw. Let's see if really deserves it." And with that, Seth takes his leave.

Second Match: Carmella Costello and The Southern Belles vs. Cordelia Capriati and The Perfections
Brooke is with Carmella and gets on the stick to reiterate her claim that her clients are going to be relentlessly breathing down the necks of the champions here in the WWE. She tells them that unless they step up their game considerably, there's going to be a lot of new champions in the coming days. Brooke puts over Carmella for being loyal and thanks her for putting forward trust. And to the Southern Belles, know that if things aren't up to snuff with Nathan Quinn, the two of them can always look to gain back those Women's Tag Titles under the guidance of Brooke.

With that said, 6 women are always a good thing. Thank Lzzy they've got the stats for in-ring work because outside of Hannah, the charisma leaves a lot to be desired. That's what managers like Brooke are for. Speaking of which, she makes herself useful by hopping up on the apron to get the ref's attention as Bonnie has Carmella in position for the Bluebonnet, but Hannah takes advantage of the ref looking the other way and KO's Bonnie with her custom mic. Brooke backs away as Carmella goes up to hit the Defamation on the fallen Bonnie to get the cheap pinfall win for the heels. Brooke looks to be getting things back in gear in her camp. ****1/4, 89% overall.

Third Match: Simon Bennett vs. Steve Hayes
More pre-match promo time as Simon has got something to say. "If you think I'm looking a bit rough you should see the other guy. Bragging Rights was, in a word, an experience. It wasn't particularly fun, but it was a fight that needed to be fought, and needed to be won. Under different circumstances, I wouldn't have wanted that for Adam and me. I get wanting to have a career of your own and had he just been honest about that up front, this whole ugly chapter wouldn't have been a thing. But what's done is done and I do have to credit Adam with giving me a gift of sorts. Adam was so gung-ho about making this return to the WWE a launching point for his trip to the top. All things being fair, I wanted to make a big impact, too. So I figure this: let's make an impact, then. Let's make this return worthwhile. Let's make all the time away mean something. Adam, in a weird way, you inspired me. What I'm about to ask for right now, I'm sure you hand in mind for yourself so I'm not going to feel bad about it. The big difference between Adam and me is that I have reached that peak and I would love to get there again. So I am officially challenging Wrakk to a match for the WWE Unified World Title! I may not have asked for these circumstances, but I might as well make the most of it while I can. Now I know he'll say something along the lines of 'things have changed since you been gone'. Well, I say let's change them back with me taking that world title from you!"

Well, that's as clear as you can get. What will Wrakk have to say about it? A question for another time as this match needs to happen. As you can imagine we've got to make Bennett look like a million bucks here. He's still smarting from the chain match and that's the story throughout this encounter as he toughs it out. It comes to end in a clean fashion as they go through a complex Irish whip reversal sequence that ends with Bennett hitting a Russian Leg Sweep on Hayes and he turns that into a Bennett Lock and that's going to give him the submission win. A strong case for Bennett being the number one contender has been made. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Once more to the back where Aphrodite is with her boys, Caleb Greene and Stanley Coleman, the Love Connection. They've got the Tag Team of the Year on their minds apparently. Aphrodite thinks that Moses McKay and King Kavovit should go back to the end of the line as far as title matches go. Aphrodite thinks that she's got the hot new thing in the tag team division, a team that could very easily be the next Tag Team of the Year. All that they need is a chance. They just need an opportunity and that can't happen when there's two sour pusses like the Royal Connection choosing to be stubborn about things. She invites the Royal Connection to test the resolve of Greene and Coleman so that she can proven right.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with the Money in the Bank holder Brandon Reigns. He steps into the ring with a five-mile smile and takes the mic to speak his mind. "Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, we are inching forward to WrestleMania 57. We're inching towards the inevitable. This briefcase holds the key to the WrestleMania moment that everyone will be talking about. Me walking out of that night with the WWE Unified Title in my hand is basically a guarantee as long as I have this briefcase. And yet, there are those who still want to be in my ear, trying to get me to second guess my plan. This even goes back to the King of the Ring, I've got people telling me to really reconsider this course of action. And I have to say that maybe there's something to that. Maybe there's a way for me to have some sort of insurance. Winning the Royal Rumble and going into the main event with two title shots in my pocket? That's a pretty juicy proposition. So I drew a number for the Rumble and thought to myself that this was a great idea, until I realized that I had so much fun watching everyone else scramble around for my amusement, and on top of that, it hit me that until WrestleMania when I cash in this contract, I don't have to do anything! I don't need to exert myself. I don't need to be answering to jealous whiners like Kerry Cemenko! I was just about ready to put that number back into the bin, but then I saw what number I did draw." Brandon pauses to reach into his pocket and pull out a slip of paper and shows it to the camera for everyone to see. It has the number 29 on it! "That's right. I drew number 29. And the idea hit me that I could make all of the peons in the back riled up. You all want a trip to WrestleMania? Well, I've got the opportunity right here in my hand. Unless you want to take a chance at maybe, MAYBE drawing number 30? The choice is yours, fellas, and I don't particularly care either way, but understand that this number right here in my hand may be your dream, but this briefcase in this other hand is your wake up call!"

Cue Kerry Cemenko himself coming on out to get in Brandon's face. No doubt he's still ticked over that whole cheap win Brandon got over him at Bragging Rights. "You know, you kind of already gave me a wake up call, Brandon. You revealed to me what a little bitch the Superstar of the Year is!" Brandon is aghast at this claim, but Kerry continues. "It takes a bitch to be proud of what you pulled at Bragging Rights, and it takes a bitch to be pulling what you're doing right now. Now I know it's not going to do me any good to try to get you to actually fight like a real man, so I'll tell you my WrestleMania plan. I'll do the whole Rumble thing, I'll take that Unified World Title, and then I'll have you all to myself."

"Pretty words, Kerry, but if Bragging Rights is anything to go by, I don't have to worry about a thing. I showed that I can handle you at anytime, it's just going to be extra sweet should it happen again at WrestleMania. But please, by all means, go give it that old college try. I'll be rooting for you the whole time. You may end up disappointing me, but you'll certainly be making me laugh like the joke that you are!"

And with that statement Kerry decides that slapping Brandon across the face is the best course of action. Brandon stumbles back from this and retreats out of the ring when he sees Kerry wants to add some more punishment. Kerry kicks the Money in the Bank briefcase out of the ring and yells a bit at Brandon as he makes his way out of here. The number 29 spot is apparently going to be up for grabs?

Fourth Match: Lyle Morris vs. Doug Michaels
It's pre-match promo night as Lyle gets on the stick to rip on his cousin, Chet. "Chet, I thought I knew you. We were close, so much that we were practically brothers! It was never in question that I would always have your back no matter the problem, no matter the size of the problem! But I guess you were hiding something from me all along. No, I don't mean your anger or your hatred or your pain. I had no idea how much of cowardly bitch you are! You talked so tough after what you did to me! You walked that aisle like you owned it and you talked one hell of a big game. Well the chicken's come home to roost and now you show how little of a man you really are. You want to throw shade at me and call me your enemy and blame me for being an anchor? NO PROBLEM! But you had better be able to back that up when the other shoe drops. I didn't ask for this, Chet. YOU DID! And one way or another, I'm getting your sorry carcass in front of me and I'm going to let you know, the hard way, just what I think of your little rebirth. You have been set free, but so have I, so I say I'm free to kick your teeth down your throat! JUST TRY ME!"

Wow, intense to say the least. Like this match as Lyle is all business and poor Michaels has to take the brunt of his aggression. Lyle finishes things fairly strong and cleanly as he sends Michaels into the turnbuckle, causing him to rebound backwards, then proceeds to come off the middle turnbuckle with a flipping clothesline/STO thing that plants Michaels and that's enough for the pin. Lyle celebrates, but notices Chet Morris on the stage looking on with trepidation. Lyle dares Chet to come into the ring to get him some but Chet isn't feeling it tonight and merely walks away. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Fifth Match: Michael Haywood vs. Romeo Valiente
We're told that Michael has been lobbying for a match against Jason Sorola, but Sorola hasn't been giving any kind of answer. Well, no time to worry about that as Michael is all business here, much like Lyle Morris in the last match. This is the third match in a row that's all about getting an individual looking strong for what's ahead. It's some fucking good shit, but then again you have to remember how Michael was part of some bangers while being teamed up with Gavin Jones. Romeo gets Michael in position to where he tries going up for the Cassanova Crush, but Michael was playing possum and he rolls out of the way of the impact. Romeo is hurting and Michael pounces on the opportunity by locking in the Rage Quit and that's going to give him the submission win. Post-match Jason Sorola comes running down and knocks Michael down from behind and locks in an STF and keeps it on while the ref tries pulling him off. To Michael's credit, he doesn't offer a tap out and instead looks like he passes out. Ultimately enough refs come down to get Sorola off of Michael, but the damage is done and Sorola taunts his fallen former comrade as he takes his leave. ****1/2, 92% overall.

And once more to the back in the dark recesses of the building where Haven has something to say. These dark recesses seem to be everywhere. He wants to talk about Victor Dark. "Victor, I know you may feel wronged. I know you may feel betrayed. I know you may feel abandoned. But those feelings, united as anger, are nothing without purpose. What will your purpose be should I fall to you? What will fill that void? If you and Andrea cannot come to a satisfactory conclusion to that conundrum, what then? Know the fight that you want to take part in. Know it as much as you know your enemy. I see my path after this fight with you is through...if you are willing to actually take part in it."

MAIN EVENT: Haven and Eddy Clash vs. Quinten McDaniels and Hugo
Quinten gets on the mic so he can brag about what he did last night. "I know for a fact that the minute I announced my participation in this year's Royal Rumble, you all went wide-eyed and then sat up straight. You did this because you needed to pay attention and be absolutely sure about what you were hearing. You did that because you know about what happened last year. I pulled off the incredible task of winning that Rumble and I came oh-so close to walking out of WrestleMania with that Unified World Title. I have felt it in my bones that I can get it done, and all I need is to complete this purge of my past and to get one more opportunity. You all know that I can do it and that makes you worry. Well, this isn't about you or your feelings. This is about me and my redemption! I invite all of my enemies, especially you, Orlando, to take part in this year's Rumble. It will be my pleasure, it will be my purpose, to take you all out myself. I have been set free and you all get to suffer the consequences!"

Well, he's confident if nothing else. Not confident enough to actually do most of the heavy-lifting here, though, as he lets Hugo handle most of the match. Eddy, the least experienced of the bunch, is tasked with face-in-peril duty. Things come to a climax with Eddy fighting off a double team and sending Quinten face first into Hugo's crotch via a drop toe hold. Haven gets the hot tag and it's breaking loose in Tulsa! Haven grabs Hugo, looking for the Sting of Solace, but Quinten low blows him from behind. HERE COMES ORLANDO KINCAID!!! He's got a chair in hand and Quinten in his sight. Quinten sees this and decides to bail with Orlando giving chase. Hugo stands over a vulnerable Haven but Eddy comes in with a save by giving Hugo a big boot. Hugo stumbles into the ropes and rebounds right into the Thunderstrike from Eddy and Haven really puts some mustard on things with a Sting of Solace and that's going to give the faces the win here. Victor Dark and Andrea make their way out onto the stage during the post-match happenings and glare at Haven as we go off the air. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

BREAKING FROM THE DESK OF THE GENERAL MANAGER! It has been confirmed that not only has Chris Collins accepted Seth Von Kamp's offer for another Intercontinental Title Match on Raw, it will open the show and be contested under Falls Count Anywhere rules.

Also, Brandon Reigns has put the number 29 spot in the Royal Rumble up for grabs and thus a 20-man open invitation battle royal will be the main event of Raw, with the winner claiming that position. How will this shape the Royal Rumble, if at all. Be sure to be there this Monday night!

Ha! That's quite the clever way to get to Duke vs. Wrakk. Visually it makes sense too because you just can imagine Hotbody being a huge asshole the entire time, trying his hardest to not get involved physically. Only to eventually tag in and nearly ruin the whole thing.

Most certainly lived up to the hype though, maybe the game is onto something with Duke. Duke for #29 in the Royal Rumble! :lol:

Brandon's antics are great too. It makes sense why the MITB winner would normally want the extra insurance but then to draw a late number and have everyone fight over it out of amusement? It's brilliant.

Raw: January 7, 2041

Opening Match: WWE Intercontinental Title - Falls Count Anywhere
Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Chris Collins
As promised, we're kicking things off with this sucker. It was a banger at Bragging Rights and it'll certainly be a banger here, no? Seth's been a fighting champion since winning the thing back at Summerslam and it's been tough to call as who can end this run and when. Collins gives it his all here to his credit. It's a fun brawl that spills into the crowd. We eventually end up at a merchandise stand as the two ruin some poor sap's day. Collins sends Seth crashing into the set up and tries choking the champion out with one of his own T-shirts. Seth responds by smacking Collins with a replica title belt, causing Collins to release his grasp. Seth finishes things by putting Collins through one of the tables with the Collapse of Society and gets the pin fall to retain the championship!

Well, that was wild to say the least. Post-match, Seth limps away in triumph BUT HERE COMES RONNIE COSTELLO!!! WTF IS HE DOING? Well, he's kicking Seth's ass apparently. He gets in some good shots after knocking the champion down and then caps things off by sending Seth through another merch stand. Brooke is evidently VERY serious with her claims about her clients. Ronnie walks off satisfied as we get officials down to the scene to check on Seth. ****1/2, 93% overall.

To the back we go where Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper are getting ready. Jake Connelly comes in to offer some words of wisdom as both men are going to be taking part in that battle royal tonight for that number 29 spot in the Rumble. Jake points out that while it sucks that there can only be one winner, if the two of them can be unified, they can assure that at least that one can be either Ethan or Cameron. Jake also emphasizes that he doesn't want any hard feelings, no matter what happens out there. Ethan says he's fine with it, but Cameron merely clutches the framed photo he gave to Jake and walks off. What's going on here?

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as our illustrious General Manager Lisa Benton comes out to address the crowd for what's sure to be a huge announcement. She takes the mic and tells the crowd that she hopes they enjoy the rest of the show, despite her announcement that she's going to reveal right now. "Almost 40 years ago, I sat in the middle of an excited wrestling crowd much like this one and was mesmerized and captivated by what I witnessed in this ring. In what was merely a chore that my brother had to do in taking me along, it became the beginning point of the path that defined not just my career, but my life. Now I stand here at another crossroads, with more than 30 years spent in this business in one form or another. It's high time that I reflect on what I'm going to do from here on out, especially with the announcement that I have for you tonight. So if you please, in the back, let's cue up the video." Lisa gestures to the big screen and we're shown a highlight package of Lisa Benton's career, interspersed with talking heads giving their insight on her as a person and performer. It ends with the announcement that Lisa Benton is the first member of this year's Hall of Fame class! And she's being inducted by Riott!

We return to the arena with a tearful Lisa and the crowd in thunderous applause, voicing their approval of this turn of events. Lisa composes herself as she continues. "I don't know if there's anything that can top something like that. I take it as the ultimate compliment from my peers, my superiors, and definitely from all of you, the people who have allowed me to take part in this journey that has been my dream. But the flipside to that is that I have to take it as a sign that I may need to head off into the sunset. So it's with a heavy heart that I will be resigning as General Manager at the end of this month." The crowd reacts with shock and voice their displeasure, but Lisa presses on. "It's not a decision that I make lightly, but looking back at all the years and being reminded of the body of work I created and with this upcoming induction, I feel like I can go home proud of all I've accomplished. I feel blessed for having this career, one that a lot of people can only dream about, but all good things must end. In their wake, there may be tears, but there is an opportunity for new good things to be born."

Cue the music of The Royal Rumble Winning Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, The Lord of the Ladder and Conqueror of Fears, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He's got a smile 5 miles wide on his face and just exudes giddiness as he comes down to the ring, interrupting Lisa. He gets on a mic and gets to work expressing his sentiments. "It must be my birthday and no one told me! Is this for real? Like, seriously? Are we finally going to be free of the tyranny that is Lisa Benton's reign of suck as the General Manager? My God, between Christmas and Luscious and I celebrating New Year's and me retaining my Cruiserweight Title, this is just an overload of excitement! I'd ask what I've done to deserve such great news, but to hell with that; I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth! This is an amazing night, to say the least. I can't believe it. Somebody pinch me because I think I'm dreaming! Lisa, it's been real, but I think I speak for a good chunk of us when I tell you don't let the door hit you on the ass on the way out! In fact, I don't see any reason why you should wait until the end of the month to call it quits. There's the exit right there! Don't let me stop you! You can go sailing off to the old folks' home right now!"

"You know, if there's one thing I'm not going to miss, it's dealing with your sorry ass, Michael," Lisa fires back. "But I had a feeling that you'd come out here. It's just in your nature to be a giant prick."

"Hey, you can't cal..."

"SHUT UP! I'm still the damn boss and I'm still capable of making your life miserable if I see fit. Like I said, I knew you'd be here so I came prepared to make another announcement, this one concerning your next title defense that will take place at the Royal Rumble event. You see, last week you made a claim that if there was anybody who had a winning record like you, then you'd be able to not only face them, but beat them as well. Well, Michael, I'm giving you a chance to prove that statement, because I did find someone with a spotless winning record that you're going to have to face for that Cruiserweight Title. It's going to be the battle of two undefeated superstars at the Royal Rumble! So let's not waste anymore time and let's bring him out. Michael, you're going to be defending that championship against this man..."

Lisa points to the stage, signaling that she wants her planned opponent to come on out. Michael Hotbody looks confused and worried as he looks to the entr...HOLY SHIT!!! IT'S NEIL QUINT!!! ARE YOU SERIOUS! The rookie comes down to the ring and shakes Lisa's hand as Michael is livid. Neil takes the mic and speaks his mind. "Lisa, it'll be an honor to take part of this match, not only because it'll be one of your last acts as General Manager, but I get to live out my own dream. And speaking of dreams, Michael, I don't know about pinching, but I do know another good way to tell that you're not dreaming." And with that statement, Neil drops the mic and slaps the taste out of Michael's mouth, sending the champion reeling. He turns back to Neil who drops into a fighting stance, making Michael think twice about this course of action and he decides to roll out of the ring in frustration. It's going to be streak versus streak at the Rumble!

Second Match: Dusk vs. Cordelia Capriati
Carmella Costello makes her way to the announce table, joining the team to lend her insights into Cordelia. Well, it's more like she wants to rag on her former partner and talk about how she's inferior. Carmella goes on to say that Cordelia left at the worst possible time because Brooke has a newfound focus. What Ronnie Costello did earlier to Seth Von Kamp is only the beginning. Carmella says that she'll prove how much better she is than Cordelia by winning some gold for herself. Carmella continues her spiel as this match goes on. Dusk continues to be a brutal, glorious mess of a performer...in a good way, allowing Cordelia to work out the kinks in her newly-acquired role as a face. Cordelia makes a comeback and it looks like she's in prime position to come off the top to hit Dusk with the Crowning Achievement, but Carmella leaves the table and goes to shove Cordelia off, causing her to land throat-first on the top rope. That's going to be a DQ, but Carmella enters the ring to try to put some more hurt on Cordelia. HERE COMES JENNA KYLE!!! Carmella makes the smart move of bailing, leaving Dusk to take the brunt of Jenna's flurry. Dusk pie faces Jenna away, giving her an opportunity to roll of the ring before things get too bad. Jenna stands tall as Cordelia starts to come around and they glare at the two heels as we go to break. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Third Match: Vivian Merrick and the Future Foundation vs. Madison and The Wyldhearts
Vivian Merrick throws the names of her boys into the hat as another team that deserves a shot at the Wyldhearts for the Tag Team Titles. Well, this seems like a good opportunity for them to make their case. Madison still has the goods as far as being able to work a match. Robbie plays face-in-peril for the majority of the match. It's interesting to revisit this combination now that roles are reversed. Anyway, the women get to be legal participants after the hot tag and Madison lets Vivian have it. The Future Foundation break up a pinfall attempt by pulling Madison off of Vivian. The Wyldhearts come in to take the Future Foundation to the outside, leaving the women alone to continue the match. Vivian ends up on the apron, but Madison tries to suplex her back into the ring. Rick Hilton is on the case, yanking Madison's foot from under her, causing Vivian to fall on top of Madison in a pin attempt. Rick holds down Madison's feet, preventing her from kicking out and Vivian is going to steal the pin for the heels. Well, this is going to stick in the craw of the champions. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fourth Match: Simon Bennett vs. L.A. Xander
Paul Andrews joins the announce team to continue to make the case for Simon Bennett being the next challenger for Wrakk's WWE Unified World Title. He points out that Bennett has been there before and since Adam Hail is no longer a factor, he can focus on leading a client to the biggest prize in the land. He asks us all to consider the story that can be told here: the prodigal son known as Simon Bennett returning to the fold, conquering adversity, overcoming betrayal, and making it to the main event of WrestleMania, Unified World Championship in hand. The team continues discussing this proposal as L.A.X. and Bennett continue a pretty solid match. Bennett continues making a good case for his claim to the number one contender status by finishing L.A.X. off pretty strong with a submission win with the Bennett Lock. Wrakk comes out onto the stage post-match to stare at Bennett with a smirk on his face. ****1/2, 92% overall.

To the back we go again where Andrea is with Victor Dark. She points out how it's been a little more than a month since their arrival, and so far, the destruction of Haven is coming along fairly slowly...if it's even happening at all. She claims that she and Victor have patience for a lot of things, but the thought of Haven's broken body and soul has been on their minds for far too long. Maybe Haven was right about one thing. Maybe Victor does need to get...physical. Victor chimes in by stating Friday seems like a good time...although he won't count out anytime before.

Fifth Match: Leah vs. Debra Phillips
I'm doing what I can to get Debra some much needed experience under her belt to set her up to be a solid hand in the women's division. I don't see championships in her future, but who knows? I do know this match is hella rough. Neither one of these ladies has it going in the charisma department. Factor in Debra's low over rating and we end up with this. It's not TERRIBLE, but we've had much better. Debra tries to bail as the ref checks on Leah, but Ainsley, continuing her little feud with Debra, comes running down to grab Debra and send her back into the ring. Debra yells her anger over this at Ainsley, but Leah capitalizes by drop kicking Debra from behind, sending her into the ropes and rebounding into a roll up from Leah to give her the win. ***1/4, 79% overall.

Ugh, that one was probably a mistake to do in hindsight.

Backstage we see Chris Collins, looking like he's on his way out of the arena and pissed as all hell. He runs into Kyle Jacobs who is talking with some officials. He tries walking past, but stops and goes to get in Kyle's face claiming that he looked at him funny. He asks if Kyle thinks it's funny that Chris didn't win the Intercontinental Title tonight. Kyle claims he doesn't care because he's got his own problems to worry about. He's about to go win the number 29 spot in the battle royal tonight. He suggests that Chris go get his head straight because being this close to Kyle in the mood he's in is asking for trouble. Chris merely shakes his head in frustration and backs off slowly before continuing on his way.

Sixth Match: The Love Connection vs. Galino & Farnes
With a good chunk of the guys being involved in the main event, it's good to be able to do these kinds of matches for the rest of the show. Aphrodite dismisses Vivian's claim of the Future Foundation being the team that deserves a chance at the Unified Tag Team Titles. She thinks it's time that some love and real sexiness get brought into the tag team championship scene. Madison may have some heart throbs, but they don't hold a candle to the Love Connection. Bold words and Caleb and Stanley do their best to live up to them here. We're back on track with the match quality here as these two teams play well off of each other. The Love Connection get Galino alone and have him set up for the Lovestruck 2.0, but the Royal Effect, apparently taking up the offer of a fight, come storming into the ring and lay waste to the faces causing a DQ. Kavovit stalks Aphrodite on the outside while McKay lays out Greene and Coleman with a Mass Effect to each one. Kavovit tells Aphrodite that's what she asked for and he takes his leave with McKay. The tag team scene is getting ugly. ****1/2, 91% overall.

MAIN EVENT: 20-Man Open Invitation Battle Royal
This was set up due to Brandon Reigns picking number 29 for the Rumble, but electing to put it for grabs for some other lucky schmo and thus we have this. Brandon himself even comes out to gloat about it and claims he's going to be sitting at ringside for this match and will personally hand over the number to whoever wins it. Just like he's going to be sitting at ringside for WrestleMania's main event, ready to pounce and cash in the Money in the Bank contract. He claims that his road to WrestleMania is already locked in and he's going to have the time of his life watching everyone else scratch and claw all over each other to get theirs.

So for this match we've got:
Alexander Piero
Xavier Cross
Zed Jones
Orlando Kincaid
Quinten McDaniels
Chet Morris
Lyle Morris
Ziggy Styles
Jason Sorola
Michael Haywood
Clubber Harris
Kyle Jacobs
Eddy Clash
Ethan Lang
Cameron Harper
Kerry Cemenko
Hugo
Lonny Richards

That's quite the collection. Two separate groups form to each try to take Eddy and Hugo out at the beginning of the match. It goes nowhere as they're able to fight off the horde and make their way to each other to slug it out. Lyle manages to eliminate himself and Chet as he tackles his cousin over the top with a Cactus Clothesline. Chet manages to send Lyle into the steps, giving him the means to escape. The match continues and Ethan and Cameron eventually get into the groove and eliminate Lonny as a team. Ziggy is the next to go at their hands. Quinten does his damndest to hide from Orlando, with the latter having to stop his pursuit every now and then to ward off anyone coming to get him. Kerry gets in a verbal scuffle with Brandon. Taking his eye off the ball ends up costing him as Quinten sends him over the top to eliminate him. Brandon taunts Kerry and it looks like a fight is going to break out but the officials get in the way. They miss Jason being eliminated by Michael Haywood. Jason slips back in and tosses Michael and the officials see THAT. Sorola feels oh-so proud of himself, but he then falls victim to Ethan and Cameron's teamwork and he gets dumped officially. Eddy is getting worked over by Piero and Kyle. Ethan and Cameron go to help. Cameron tries going for Eddy's legs and manages to lift Eddy up and over but Ethan goes over the top with Eddy in a double elimination. Ethan is all "WTF", but Cameron doesn't seem to notice. He tries going for Orlando, but Orlando turns the tables on him and manages to hit the OK Corall. Orlando dumps Cameron Harper for his first elimination. Cross gets thrown out by Clubber Harris. Hugo and Quinten are the new double team threat as they work over Piero. Zed hammers away on Clubber in the corner. He charges Clubber, looking to land a big boot, but Clubber moves out of the way and Zed gets his foot on the top rope. That leaves him vulnerable to getting dumped by Harris. Kyle gets into the groove and goes on an explosive run of offense. That gets put to a halt when Chris Collins comes down to ringside to get Kyle's attention. Kyle gestures to Chris to get the hell out of here, but Chris stands defiant and taunts Kyle. Quinten and Hugo take the opportunity to double team Kyle into oblivion. They then proceed to dump Kyle to end his night. Hugo tries charging Orlando who's leaning against the ropes, but Orlando low bridges him and Hugo goes stumbling over the top to send him packing. Quinten tries his luck with Orlando and the two struggle against the ropes, each trying to force the other over. Harris comes over to break the tie and dumps them both, leaving himself and Alexander Piero.

We get a solid mini-match here from these two and...wait a minute. Is the count off? Did we miss someone being eliminated? Seems like the count is off. Oh, well, it's good shit from these two as the pace and intensity pick up as Brandon looks on. Harris finally looks like he's got things well in hand as he goes to throw Piero over but Piero locks his legs around Clubber's head and uses the momentum to pull Clubber over the top via a head scissors and he's the last one left in the ring! Piero has don...WAIT A MINUTE!!! WHO THE HELL IS THAT COMING OUT FROM UNDER THE RING BEHIND PIERO??? IT'S BUTCH FLEMING!!! WTF?!?!?!?! He hasn't been seen since SummerSlam!!! Piero doesn't see him! Butch spins Piero around and clotheslines him down viciously. Piero is too spent to fight back and Butch takes advantage of this surprise assault and tosses Piero over the top for the actual final elimination. Oh, dear God, that means Butch Fleming gets to enter the Rumble at number 29! Brandon Reigns looks as surprised as everyone. Butch goes over to the Money in the Bank holder and smiles in his face. Brandon merely holds up the number and Butch snatches it out of his hand. Holy hell, has the landscape of the Rumble changed or what? 88% overall.

Overall show rating: 86%

If nothing else, I know who to push if Drakken gets too big for his britches or decides to ride off into the sunset earlier than expected. He'll need a good last name. Duke Silver or something or other.

The Benton/Hotbody angle was all kinds of glorious. Benton getting her moment of glory with making the Hall of Fame, Hotbody getting to be a dick to her one last time and then Benton getting one over on him.

Quint's a cool choice for an opponent and I actually have no idea what will give with that one. Hotbody's run feels like it needs to end at Mania, yet an impressive undefeated streak also feels more like a Mania thing. No idea which way it will go. Part of me would be tempted to have Hotbody lose only to sneak into the Rumble and win it in the most shithouse way possible :lol:

Speaking of sneaking in and winning - holy shit Butch Fleming! Usually the Rumble match itself is a time for surprise returns, so that makes for a nice twist to have a return ahead of time.

Wonder if the Rumble match itself will have a WWE-esque legend entrant. Get Ian Moore's ancient ass out there or something.

Oh, man, I wonder who I could grab from the free agent list to be surprise entrant. I don't know if it'd be anybody you'd know, but I'll take a gander. Ian would be something for a guy pushing 60.

Fuck, if El Dandy were still available and I went with your idea of Hotbody getting in, that'd be a great payoff.

*phonecall to AAA and CMLL*

"Listen, do you have anyone there that can grow their hair out to look like El Dandy? We want to give them a quick stint as El Dandy Jr.

Hello????"

Superstars: January 10, 2041

TWENTY-MINUTE OPENING PROMO OF DOOM TIME!!!!1111 as Butch Fleming, fresh off returning on Raw and being the number 29 entrant for the Rumble, makes his way to ring. He gets right back into the thick of things by being a dick and berating everyone. "There was a certain something that Quinten McDaniels said last week that stayed with me. He said that you all sat up at attention when you found out he'd be in the Royal Rumble. Well, Monday on Raw, in that main event, I guarantee you all not only sat up, but you soiled yourselves when you saw that I was back! The piss started trickling from every pansy in that locker room when they saw me return and get that number 29 spot in the Rumble! The brutality of Hell in a Cell wasn't going to keep me down and away no matter how hard you hoped. In fact, your hope to never see me again was the fuel I used to pick myself up out of the mess I was in and come back in the most painful way possible way! I wanted to find a way to really make you all choke on all of your stupid little hopes and wishes! AND YOU DESERVE IT!!! You all wanted SummerSlam to be the end of me! You hoped that you would never see me again! Well the nightmare is back and it doesn't matter if you want to cry about it! So now all eyes are on the Rumble. I'm in possibly the best position I could ask for at number 29. Oh, there is a number 30, I understand that. But all that means is that some poor son of a bitch is going to have 2 minutes to rethink his life and whether or not it's worth making that trip down the aisle to where I'm knocking whoever's left in the ring around from pillar to post! And if anyone wants to do something about what I did on Raw, the line starts right here and I'll give you a taste of what the hell I'm talking about because I'm on my way to WrestleMania and getting back what's mine! DEAL WITH IT!" And with that emphatic statement, Butch slams the mic down and leaves the ring continuing to taunt the crowd.

Backstage, some of the locker room has been watching Butch's comments on the monitor. Two of them are Madison and Alexander Piero. The two look extremely upset, with Piero shaking his head in disappointment and the two start walking away. They're caught by our roving backstage interview crew who want to ask them about their thoughts on Butch Fleming and what went down on Raw. Piero talks about how Butch only succeeded in doing two things: being a coward and pissing Piero off. Madison adds that Piero is eager to be first in that line Butch talked about just now. He can't just steal from Piero and expect to get away with it. And with that, the two go off on their way.

First Match: The Academy vs. Galino & Farnes
Luscious is with the TOP LEGAL COUNSEL of Galino & Farnes and wants to assure all of Hotbody's fans that the two of them are combing through EVERY scrap of Neil Quint's history as a competitor! Freddie Galino adds that if Lisa Benton is going to award a championship match to someone claiming to have a spotless record like Michael Hotbody, there can't be any shred of evidence to the contrary! "The legal team of Galino & Farnes are tireless and committed to integrity and justice will prevail in one form or another!"

Fun as it is to have Galino & Farnes be douchey and slimy, The Academy needs to make a rebound coming off of that little mini feud with their former camp. We get a great outing here as I often forget how good Galino & Farnes actually are in terms of stats. We head home as Sophie Waters runs interference against Luscious and her attempt to get the GAVEL OF DOOM involved. Randy Ellis gets a hold of the gavel but tosses it to Galino when he sees the ref about turn his attention back to the match. Galino tries to use it, but the ref stops him and takes it away. The ref goes to put it out of the ring with Galino right after him in protest. He eats a flying kick from Mitchell coming off the top and that dazes Galino enough for Randy to hit Today's Lesson on him to score the pin for the Academy. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Second Match: Kerry Cemenko vs. Zed Jones
We're shown Brandon Reigns in the crowd making his way to a ringside seat behind the announce crew. I guess he's serious about this whole "do nothing" schtick. Kerry isn't thrilled seeing the Money in the Bank winner again and gets on the mic to give him shit. He tells Brandon that he can't hide behind that briefcase forever. Kerry then says he's going to make it a point to be around to watch all of Brandon's WrestleMania plans blow up in his face and laugh about it. Well, that's good to know. We get a hard-hitting match out of these two, with Kerry being extra salty. They head to the outside where the count begins. Zed manages to press Kerry onto the announce table and thinks about utilizing a chair for nefarious purposes. Clubber Harris joins the ringside area and meets eyes with Zed. Clubber stalks Zed for a bit, putting a pause on any chair-related plans Zed has in mind. Kerry stealthily crawls back into the ring to break the count and the ref eventually reaches 10 to award the win to Kerry. Zed is understandably upset at this turn of event and decides to go after Clubber with the chair. Clubber ducks and Zed misses and we've got ourselves a brawl. Luscious hops onto the back of Clubber, trying to go for the eyes, but he gets her off. That's enough of an opening for Zed to boot Harris in the bread basket and send him over the announce table. Zed scoops up Luscious and takes his leave. These two seem to be headed towards another showdown. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Backstage we go where we once again catch up with the Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp. He's asked about what went down on Raw with Ronnie Costello after the title match. Seth wonders where the hell all of these guys come from. He's not going to think on it too hard, though, because he's equipped to send them back to wherever with their tails in between their legs and a story to tell everyone about how they failed when stacked up against the man known as Seth Von Kamp. He supposes that Ronnie Costello wants to be the next man on that list.

Brooke steps into the picture and hijacks the interview. She clarifies that the only thing Ronnie wants to be is the new Intercontinental Champion. "And while there are other avenues he could've taken, you needed to be aware of just how serious I am about my new initiative. I said it before that no champion is safe from me. The only question now, Seth, is are you going to be bold enough to try to prove me wrong?"

Seth leans in closer to Brooke and gives his response. "The question I would ask is whether or not your boy has it in him to prove you right? I'm down for some payback and I'm always down for defending this title. You get your boy to show up tomorrow on SmackDown!." And with that, Seth takes his leave.

Third Match: The Jersey Experience vs. The Pacific Connection
Man, there are some people I haven't put on TV in a while. Fortunately, this is Superstars and I'm always in need of some easy ratings. Enter 4 incredibly talented and gorgeous ladies! I'd like to be able to start pushing one of these teams into a bigger role. Maybe after WrestleMania. Anyways, some hot stuff here and Jamie Roderick finishes things in a decisive fashion by getting Mika to submit to the Roderick Legacy, giving the Jersey Experience the win. ****1/2, 88% overall.

Fourth Match: Ozzy Mandias vs. Patrick Dean Quartermaine
Ozzy gets on the mic and warns Jordan Demiras that he's still in his crosshairs. He claims that Jordan and Martyn LaSalle thought it was funny to treat Ozzy like a joke and not an equal. "They're not laughing now, are they?!? Jordan, the respect that I deserve is going to be beaten from you, one way or another!" Ozzy demonstrates how serious he's become with a very focused outing here against Quartermaine. Things finish when it looks like Ozzy has tweaked his knee. Patrick isn't buying it and keeps trying to go in for the kill, but the ref keeps stopping him. Patrick finally just pulls the ref out of the way, but Ozzy goes to the eye and quickly lands a sunset flip to get the cheap win. ****, 90% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The Royal Rumble Winning Hero to Millions Around the World, the Host With THE Highest Rated Interview Show In All of Entertainment, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover of the Manager of the Year Slammy Award Winner and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Mister Twenty-Forty, The Two Time Slammy Award Winner Including the Rookie of the Year and the Most Envied Superstar of the Year, the Man Who is the Rightful Winner of the Slammy for Cruiserweight of the Year, The Lord of the Ladder and Conqueror of Fears, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He welcomes us all to the show and wants to get down to some serious business after the events on Raw this past Monday.

"Alright so there's some REALLY big news that needs to get addressed. One that involves one of the biggest stars in the history of this company and the incredible downer it was to hear what was going to happen to them! That's right, I am of course talking about me being forced to defend my title against some flavor-of-the-month like Neil Quint! There was OUTRAGE and SADNESS reverberating throughout the fandom of the WWE! And who is the perpetrator of such ridiculousness? None other than that cow who's being put out to pasture at the end of the month, Lisa Benton!!! Well, the joke is going to be on her! You can't just have some rookie fresh off the street coming in and getting involved in the Cruiserweight Title picture after just a few months! That's absolutely absurd! But you all need to know something, and if I may reinforce what my TOP LEGAL COUNSEL stated earlier, we are making sure that Lisa Benton and Neil Quint aren't trying to pull a fast one on all of you! Lisa Benton can't promote a match claiming one participant is undefeated when chances are he's got a loss or two in some backwater little town out in some potato field in Idaho or whatever! So Galino & Farnes are hard at work combing through Neil's sordid little history because this would be a blatant case of FALSE ADVERTISING if I ever saw it! You can't trust Neil Quint, but you can take comfort knowing that I will always be a beacon of truth and a surefire bet when you need to put your faith in something. I mean, what do we really know about Neil Quint anyway? Well, we're all in luck because I have the show and the platform to get to the bottom of things, so Neil Quint, this is your invitation to come on out here and be an open book to these people and make your case for why you think a sorry sack like yourself belongs in the ring with me! Come on out here!"

Well, there's the invitation, but is Neil Quint going to resp...oh, wait, there he is. He's got the same expression on his face that everyone who deals with Hotbody has, but he persists in his trip to the ring to join the Cruiserweight Champion. He takes a mic and gestures to Hotbody that he's here and ready.

Hotbody takes the opportunity to begin this interview of sorts. "Alright, Neil, all cards on the table. You would really be doing me a solid by saving on legal fees if you just came clean and told us the truth about your wrestling record, OK? We all start out small doing shows in high schools and backyards and county fairs and what not. At least that's what I've been told. I've been lucky enough to have a straight shot into the WWE and can actually claim an incredible winning streak, but I know that others aren't so fortunate. So what's the deal, Neil?"

"Michael, let's get down to the actual reality of this situation. Whether or not I'm undefeated actually wouldn't matter. Even if I had a thousand losses to my name the sad truth is I would still be better than you."

"Oh, so you're not going to answer the question? Well, tha..."

"NO, I'M NOT GOING TO ANSWER THE GOD DAMN QUESTION!!!" Neil snaps. "I don't answer to you. I don't give two ounces of crap about you and I'm not going to get sucked into this stupid little world of yours! It all comes down this, Michael. You're not afraid of heights or cages or anything like that. You're afraid of being nothing! You're on one hell of a run, I'll give you that. But the reality of what could happen at the Royal Rumble when I face you for that title is setting in, isn't it? You've got a man with all the momentum in the world coming at you on that night and you're shaking in your boots and tossing in your sleep worried that you don't have anything in your playbook to stop it from hitting you like a ton of bricks! You want to know about Neil Quint? Here's all you and all the people watching need to know, Michael. I'm a winner. I've been winning. I'm going to keep on winning and you're in the middle of that road. Do what you need to do to get you through the days, Michael. For all the good it does." And with that Neil throws the mic down, apparently done with all of this, but as he goes to leave Michael decides to clobber him in the back of the head with the Cruiserweight Title, knocking him down to the mat. He puts some mustard on it by knocking over the podium onto Neil and walks out of the ring in a celebratory fashion as we go to break.

Fifth Match: Carmella Costello vs. Missy Brantley
Brooke wants to work that mic and get a few things off her chest. She brags about so many things being put into motion that are going her way. Ronnie Costello has a shot at the Intercontinental Title tomorrow night on SmackDown!. Salvatore Scabbia is going to run though that Royal Rumble, no matter what number he gets, and go to WrestleMania to win what's rightfully his. "And as far as tonight goes, Sonya Braddock better be paying attention to Carmella here. Sonya, I know you don't have the guts to be showing up all the time, but I'm hoping you at least have the brains to be aware of the danger that's knocking at your door. I'm going to see to it that Carmella is in line for that belt around your waist that you think is yours. It makes you look great in an 8 x 10, but that's all it is: a look. I've made it a point of professional pride to surround myself with people who have substance. Know that the day you find yourself in the ring with Carmella is going to the longest of your life!"

Carmella does her best to live up to those words here in a spectacular showing. It comes to an end when Missy has Carmella lined up for a Lasso and she preps herself in the corner for launch while the ref checks on Carmella. Brooke seizes the opportunity to be a nuisance and grabs one of Missy's ankles and holds on. Missy understandably turns her attention to these turn of events and wastes time yelling at Brooke. Carmella charges at Missy and sandwiches her in the corner against the turnbuckle then hits her with the Defamation off the top to score the win. ****1/2, 92% overall.

We're told that backstage, the cameras have picked up something odd involving Cameron Harper. Apparently, word was that Harper was spotted talking to someone and our crack interview team tried tracking him down, finding him turning a corner, coming out from some back hallway. Harper is surprised at being found and he gets pressed about what he's doing here. Cameron assures everyone that it's nothing that anybody needs to be concerned about. He's just here trying to take initiative. He knows that's the kind of thing that Jake Connelly likes. "Other than that, there's nothing more that needs to be said." Cameron goes off on his merry way, but someone else comes out of the same hallway as Cameron. It's...Chet Morris? He sees the crew and heads off in his own direction avoiding them. WTF was that?

MAIN EVENT: Orlando Kincaid vs. Xavier Cross
Orlando makes it clear before the match that he's still got his heart set on covering his hands with the blood of Quinten McDaniels. It's a fight he didn't ask for or want, but it's a fight he'll enjoy finishing and it'll be extra sweet to make Quinten one of those 29 other bodies that Orlando is going to toss over the top rope on the way to winning the Royal Rumble. "Quinten, I want you to add this to that of things you're going through with all of this ass backwards therapy crap. I'm going to do what you couldn't and that's leave WrestleMania with that World Title and that's MY WAY of purging my past!"

So we finish hella strong with this match. This might actually have to be an extended program that I do down the road so that I can get those sweet, sweet stars and ratings. I mean, look at the results of this match! And it's on God damn Superstars! Anyways, despite being a fucking awesome match, Quinten McDaniels has to come on down to ruin things when it looks like Orlando has Xavier set up for the OK Corral. He goes low on Orlando and then tosses him over the top rope. He gets a grin on his face and goes out to get Orlando's body back into the ring, only to stomp the piss out of him and throw him back over again. He yells at Orlando that it's Quinten's time this year and he stands tall as we go off the air. *****, 95% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

SmackDown!: January 11, 2041

Opening Match: Michael Haywood and Jordan Demiras vs. Jason Sorola and Ozzy Mandias
I say we start this show off hot. And then the DUD show says "LOL, go fuck yourself." I mean, looking at the rating it shouldn't be a big deal, but fuck, that could've been a 96% easily. Not hard to see why considering the heat amongst all of these fine gentlemen. Things break down with Ozzy and Jordan as the legal men and Sorola gets chased by Michael. The ref is distracted with that bit of tomfoolery. Jordan goes over to try to get Ozzy back into the ring. He reaches over the top but Ozzy pops up and smashes Jordan in the head with something. Is that Jordan's Cruiserweight of the Year Slammy? Where'd he get it from? A question for another time as Jordan is down and out and vulnerable to Ozzy's Blizzard of Oz and that's going to get the cheap win for the heels via pin. Ozzy isn't done and decides to mount Jordan and bean him in the head repeatedly with the award until he decides he's done enough. *****, 85% overall.

To the back we go where the WWE Unified World Champion Wrakk wants to finally address Simon Bennett. He's asked if he's given any consideration to facing Simon Bennett and defending the Unified World Title against him. Wrakk says that Simon must be psychic because he's going to say the exact thing that Simon predicted. "The landscape of the WWE has changed in the time that Simon Bennett was gone and doing whatever. Now, I'm not dumb. I pay attention to the major waves that are made here. I saw Simon Bennett make his big, glorious return. And while it looks like he hasn't lost a step and even gained a bit of an edge judging from that match at Bragging Rights, the years haven't brought him wisdom. Luckily, I'm in one hell of a position to provide that to him. An opponent like Simon Bennett is just the example I need to demonstrate my vision for the new year. Even seasoned veterans aren't safe! Simon, you and I share something, in that a signficant time away from all of this has left us with something to prove. At the Royal Rumble, you'll get all of what I have to prove the hard way." Looks like we have another title match set for the Rumble!

Second Match: Leah vs. Hannah McCormick
Nathan Quinn gets on the mic and informs us that his team of the Southern Belles are exercising their right to a rematch and they will get their chance at regaining the Women's Tag Team Titles that were stolen from them at the Royal Rumble. Nathan goes on to say that Leah has a lot of nerve parading around the place as if she is in any shape or form superior to Hannah McCormick. Leah leeched off of Hannah's stardom and she knows it! All that's left now are the days that Hannah and Bobbi are counting until that day they can make those posers suffer...that is, of course, if Leah has it in her to survive right here and right now!

Never let it be said that Leah isn't game. She's a ball of fire here and makes Nathan eat his words...well, via proxy as Hannah is left to take the abuse. Another sound outing that fights against the DUD show's wrath is on display. It comes to an end when the ref is bumped after Hannah ducks a clothesline from Leah. They continue to brawl and Nathan tries to help out by tossing Hannah her custom mic, but Leah makes a case for a women's NFL with her interception skills. She threatens to hit Nathan with it but he hops off the apron to avoid that. She yells some more at him and Hannah comes to grab her from behind, but Leah instinctively strikes her with the mic. The ref has come to, though, and sees this and calls for the bell to DQ Leah. Leah is understandably upset at this and goes to mount Hannah to give her some more punishment but Nathan drags his client out of the ring to save her. More and more intensity gets added to this whole affair. ****1/2, 83% overall.

God damn DUD show.

Once again to the back where it looks like Chet Morris has hijacked a camera crew. He claims that he's tired of all the talk from everyone and especially Lyle Morris about how he's apparently a coward. "Lyle, you listen very carefully. I wasn't afraid to do what I did to you and I'm not afraid to do it again! I have moved past you and it ain't my problem you feel left behind! But if you think you need to get something out of your system, well, I'm heading to that ring RIGHT NOW so let's see who's really the coward!" And with that Chet goes marching to the entryway. Are we getting a match? We go to break with that question in the air.

Third Match (???): Chet Morris vs. Lyle Morris
Well, we're back and Chet is indeed in the ring, gesturing to the back and calling for his cousin. Some time passes and it looks like we're not going to s...NO, WAIT! LYLE COMES IN FROM BEHIND! Lyle is all over Chet with a flurry that causes Chet to retreat to the outside. Lyle is in hot pursuit, not giving an inch. Lyle gets Chet down and backing away. Chet is trapped as he's up against the ringside barrier. Lyle has a dangerous look in his eye as Chet begs off. WAIT A MINUTE! Cameron Harper comes up behind Lyle Morris and spins him around. Lyle is all "WTF?" and Cameron gives him some lip before slapping the crap out of Lyle. Lyle goes reeling backwards and Chet pounces on this distraction to grab Lyle and send him into the barrier. Cameron walks off looking satisfied and Chet decides to put some more hurt on Lyle by dropping him across the announce table. Chet issues another warning to Lyle before walking away. What the hell was up with Cameron Harper?

Fourth Match: Cordelia Capriati vs. Vivian Merrick
Sophie Waters gets on the stick to talk for Cordelia and offers a counterpoint to all of Brooke's talk. She claims that as far as she's concerned, she got the real winner in the split between Carmella and Cordelia. Sophie claims that Cordelia isn't done with Carmella by a long shot, but taking a stab at that Women's Title is also on Cordelia's plate and it's going to feel so good to see the look on Brooke's face when she realizes that she backed the wrong horse.

A bit odd to compare your female client to a horse, but the point is made. Vivian, though, has something to say about all this and we get a firey back-and-forth match here. Carmella comes out on stage to observe the match and Cordelia makes it a point to acknowledge her presence now and then through the contest. It comes to an end when Vivian tries a superplex on Cordelia. Cordelia fights it off and sends Vivian off the top, causing her to land face down on the mat. Vivian struggles to get back up, but Cordelia comes off with the Crowning Achievement and that's going to give Cordelia the win via pin. Carmella walks off with disgust on her face as Cordelia celebrates. ****1/2, 81% overall.

More interview time in the back where Orlando Kincaid is eager to talk some smack about Quinten McDaniels. He claims that he's been having dreams each night these last few days. "The details change a little every time, but the overall story is the same. One way or another, I manage to wrap my hands around the neck of that little ass stain called Quinten McDaniels. And then after I wrap my hands around that neck, I look him dead in the eye and staring right back at me is a scared little puppy who knows what's coming. So once I get a good look at that and I know I've managed to crush all the hope out of him, I beat the living piss out of Quinten McDaniels until my hands can't take it anymore and then I throw him over the top rope! Quinten, dreams can come true, and at the Royal Rumble, I don't just wish for them to come true, I NEED them to come true. I need to smack you around and make you pay! I need to throw you over that top rope and eliminate you in that Rumble. Quinten, you gave me the gift of a fire under my ass. It's too damn bad that it was the biggest mistake of your life and no amount of this therapeutic crap you're going through is gonna help you!"

Fifth Match: Victor Dark vs. Raymond Delaney
This is Victor's in-ring debut as he alluded to on Raw. Andrea is with Victor, of course, and she gets on the mic to set the stage. "This was inevitable, in one fashion or another. Haven needs to understand completely who he is dealing with when it comes to Victor Dark. Haven, you need to understand that Victor is not the same man you abandoned all that time ago. He has had years to mold himself into the specimen you see right now. More importantly, he's molded all of those emotions into raw fuel. You and everyone else needs the Fear of the Dark to be put into you and it starts tonight!"

Talk is cheap, but Victor, to his credit, backs it up 100%. I just wish his debut happened on a non-DUD show so that it could've had a little more punch. This goes as you'd expect, with Victor getting his shine and being a dominant force. It comes to an end with Delaney falling victim to Darkness Falls in a thunderous impact and that's going to allow Victor to score the pin and make a hell of a first impression in the ring. Messages have been sent. ****1/4, 78% overall.

More backstage shenanigans as Vivian Merrick is storming out of the building, upset with what went down in her match earlier when she bumps into Aphrodite. Vivian is incredulous at the sight of Aphrodite and asks if she's going to give crap about Vivian's loss. Aphrodite claims she's been doing her best to lobby on behalf of the Love Connection to get a shot for them at the Tag Team Titles. Vivian scoffs at the idea of anyone under Aphrodite's watch being equipped to take home the championship. Vivian, on the other hand, has a team that was already champions. Very good and very dominant champions and it's high time that the Future Foundation have those titles again! Vivian claims that they were stolen from the Future Foundation in the first place in one of the most unfair set of circumstances EVER and she'll be damned if a couple of geeks like Coleman and Greene are going to be in contention. Aphrodite suggests that perhaps Vivian's team should take it up with those "geeks" personally. She proposes the Future Foundation versus The Love Connection this Monday on Raw. Vivian scoffs again but agrees, if only because it'll help prove her point. And with that, Vivian continues on her way.

Sixth Match: Alexander Piero vs. Zed Jones
Luscious gets on the stick on behalf of Zed and declares that Zed has had enough of Clubber Harris. She claims that Clubber has been doing a lot of overcompensating as of late because he knows that he got outshined by Zed in their match on the SmackDown! Send-Off a few weeks ago. Zed may have lost, but the blame can be put on all the things that Zed has on his plate! He has an intense training regimen to keep up! He has to be on guard for both Luscious AND Michael Hotbody! His sharpness can only be streched so far! "But rest assured, Clubber, that the next time you want to dare step into the ring and try your luck again with Zed, he's going to be all over you and the question of who's the real big dog in this fight will be answered!"

This match is the goods and while the guys do their thing, Madison is able to keep things on the level by making sure Luscious isn't pulling any crap. Ultimately, neither Madison or Luscious are going to have a say in the matter as while they have a scuffle that draws the attention of the referee, BUTCH FLEMING comes running down to smack Piero in the back with a chair! WTF?!? He puts some mustard on it by hitting the Slaughterhouse Special and rolling out of the ring. Zed dives on top of the fallen Piero as the ref finishes up with his business with the women and Zed ends up getting the cheap pin off of Butch's interference. Butch isn't done as afterwards he slides back into the ring and stands over Piero, yelling something at him along the lines of "Is this what you want, boy?!?" Zed tries to leave BUT HERE COMES CLUBBER HARRIS!!! He brawls with Zed a bit, but Butch isn't feeling discriminatory and decides to smack Clubber with the chair, too. This whole ordeal ends up being a heel beatdown as Butch and Zed pair off with their victims and toss them around. Butch is especially vicious towards Piero, bending the chair with repeated shots to Piero's body. We get officials down to get some degree of order, but the damage is done. ****1/2, 81% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Intercontinental Title
Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Ronnie Costello
Brooke addresses Sophie Waters and the comments she made earlier. "Sophie, I hope you don't think for a second that what went down earlier tonight with Cordelia is in any intimidating. Carmella knows Cordelia, inside and out. And on top of it all, she has ME! The brains are always the deciding factor and you've always come up short when you went against me in that department. Carmella's rise to that Women's Title is coming, and I am going to take great pride in being the guiding hand that will make that possible. But don't take my word for it. A preview is about unfold right before your very eyes and the Intercontinental Title will be the first prize that will be claimed by my new initiative!"

Man, is this a night for talking or what? Fortunately, Seth and Ronnie aren't down for talking and they deliver a strong conclusion to the night. Well, strong for a DUD show that is. We're treated to an awesome back-and-forth match that looks like it can go either way. Of course, it can't last as Ronnie has the Brooke factor to tip things in his favor. Well, Seth had a good run, but I've got to make it look like Brooke and her crew are serious. So we're going to go with this route: Brooke hops up on the apron to draw the referee's attention. Wait, what's this? She has the Intercontinental Title belt on the apron! She takes advantage of the ref being distracted with her and she kicks the belt through the legs of the ref towards Ronnie. Ronnie clutches it as he feigns vulnerability. Seth goes on the attack, unaware of the situation and he hoists Ronnie up for the Collapse of Society, but Ronnie clobbers Seth in the forehead with the belt to put a stop to those plans. Ronnie ditches the belt and goes up to hit the Defamation as Brooke relents in her distraction. The ref sees the cover from Ronnie and counts the pin to put an end to Seth's run as Intercontinental Champion. *****, 85% overall.

WINNER AND NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION: Ronnie Costello

And with that, we go off the air with a triumphant Ronnie and Brooke as they stand tall and confident. What does this mean for the rest of the champions on the roster?

Overall show rating: 84%

Heel of the night: The DUD show.

I still remain envious of your DUD shows pulling ratings in the 80s. The roster is just next-level all around.

Fucking sucks to have a title change "wasted" on a DUD show though, but hey it still pulled in the 5 star bonanza so FACK YOU to EWR.

Butch Fleming might have my favorite promos outside of Hotbody. Writing for Fleming is just "act like a modern day Republican" and hurl insults accordingly.

When it comes to writing for Butch Fleming, I have to picture someone who's angry at the world all the time. It's easy to get into that mindset as I often have periods where a lot of things irk me in a short period of time and I just start to hate every motherfucker and their mother. A lot of his rants are based on stuff I want to yell at people from time to time.

Hotbody is just me being completely uninhibited in my goofiness, sprinkled in with a touch of wishful thinking. In both instances, I have to ask myself what can I come up with that would drive people to want to pay to see these douches get theirs. As you can probably tell, there's a lot of inspiration in the real world from which to draw.

My brain immediately pictures Butch Fleming as The Butcher from AEW

https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/i...OhtFEWJWvqKfy_

Angry ass motherfucker with a sweet mustache (ironically he’s a super cool dude IRL and played guitar for Every Time I Die

Well, Butch is certainly an angry ass motherfucker. I think we've all come across somebody like this, especially a co-worker, where they live in a perpetual state of having woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Other note I forgot to add after one of the shows, Miles Shawcross eats a suspension for the rest of the month for apparently being tough to deal with according to my crew. Take a time out to get yourself together, bro.

I'm doing my best to keep the momentum going, but the dodgy nature of the boards as of late has been throwing me off. I'm in the middle of the next Raw right now.

Raw: January 14, 2041

TWENTY MINUTE OPENING PROMO OF DOOM!!!!!111 as the number 29 entrant in this year's Royal Rumble, Butch Fleming, comes out to grace us with his presence. He looks like he's got more venom to spew at the world so let's hear what it is this time around.

"If there's one thing I can count on whenever I'm gone for a long time it's there ends up being a couple of boys who use that time to grow too big for their britches. All of a sudden, they've managed to grow a set in between their legs and think they own the place. But the kick in the pants about all that is that I get to come back into the picture and show them the reality of the situation and who runs things around here. Alexander Piero, credit where it's due, you deserve a pat on the back for taking me up on my offer to get in line and try to do something about what I did last week. Now the best you could do was talk crap behind my back, but, hey, that's enough to get you on my radar so hats off to you! What ended up happening to you was the finding out part of you messing around. Your sad little outrage offends me, Piero! You got a dealt a bad hand last week. Suck it up and take it like a man because you don't deserve this number 29 spot and you don't deserve my attention! You served your purpose as an example and I take this opportunity to extend the same invitation I did last week. You got a problem with me and this Royal Rumble situation? By all means, take a shot and end up like Piero because I'm not going to be questioned! I'm not going to be insulted! I'm going to be the last man standing in that ring after everybody's been sent packing in that Rumble and I'm making one hell of a return by taking that Unified World Title at WrestleMania! And one more thing...Brandon Reigns! I know you're here. You're here somewhere sitting on your ass instead of being a man. For your own sake, you had better rethink this whole cash-in at WrestleMania strategy you got in mind because the only thing you're going to do with that briefcase at WrestleMania is choke on it!"

This is obviously time for an interruption and this time it's going to be the former Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp, fresh off of having his title stolen from him by Ronnie Costello on SmackDown!. Butch looks furious at this turn of events as Seth enters the ring with a mic in hand, ready to gab. "Butch, I consider myself pretty good at reading a room and I think I can safely say that nobody gives a damn about your...what's the term...belly-aching?"

Butch is incredulous at this statement as the crowd gives their approval to it. Seth continues despite Butch's anger. "No, spare me this little show, Butch! I hate to be the bearer of reality, but the truth is we're not afraid of you, least of all me. I don't care about what ticked you off this time around and I don't even know what it is you have to be mad about. You got your number 29 spot in the Rumble. You made your big return. I'M the one with the actual gripe and all this chest pounding you're doing out here is getting in the way of that. I'M going to use this time and I'm going to use it to call out that son of a bitch who stole my Intercontinental Title on Friday. RONNIE COSTELLO, get your ass out here right now so I can do what I was going to do and that's beat you for that belt!"

We get no answer from Ronnie, but Butch is ready to offer his response. "Seth, I've gone easy on you in the past because I've known that you were never one of those guys who was going to have the moxie to try to step up to me and piss me off, but you've both suprised me and proved my point! Look at you out here pretending you're somebody that anybody should respect. It's almost adorable. Of course, you do realize that now I have to teach you some respect for coming out here and getting all up in my business, right?"

"That's fine with me. I got a lot of aggression to get out and if Ronnie Costello's going to be a wuss, I might as well use it on someone who's asking for it."

Things look like they're going to reach a boiling point, but our illustrious General Manager (and Hall of Fame candidate) Lisa Benton comes out to try to quell things. "Hold on a sec, you two. I know I'm on my way out, but I'm still calling the shots around here and this little scuffle is going to have to wait a while. I suggest the two of you suit up and get prepped because you're going to be tonight's main event. And if there's any objection to that, then Seth, you can forget about Ronnie and another chance at the Intercontinental Title. And Butch? You can forget about that number 29 spot in the Royal Rumble. That's final, you two!" And with that Lisa's music plays us out as Seth reluctantly rolls out of the ring, eyes fixated on Butch the entire time. We're going to have an awesome main event...hopefully.

Backstage, Cameron Harper is getting ready when Jake Connelly joins him, looking none too pleased. Connelly is furious as he points out Cameron's mistake last week in eliminating Ethan Lang from the battle royal and then asks Cameron what the hell he was doing on Superstars and SmackDown! associating with Chet Morris and taking part in what happened to Lyle Morris. Cameron looks ready to erupt in tears as he turns to face Connelly. He responds with a major outburst.

"YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I DID WHAT I DID?!? What choice did I have?!? All I wanted was to get even with what Lyle Morris did to me a few weeks back and neither YOU or Ethan wanted to back me up on that! And as far as Ethan getting eliminated last week? That was an accident, plain and simple! Maybe he should've been more careful and more in-step with me! I don't even know why we need Ethan! Jake, he's great and all, but I don't know if this is really going to work. I'M the only client you need! Quite frankly, if this whole Lyle Morris situation is anything to go on, I have to just flat out say it: he may be holding us back."

Connelly calmly collects himself with a deep breath before locking eyes with Cameron and replies with a stern tone. "Cameron, I want you to listen and listen really well. I have a reputation to uphold and it's not going to get soiled with this attitude of yours. I have a ship and I have a course for that ship. You're welcome to get off that ship if you want, but I'm not putting up with anymore of this. Tonight, you and Ethan are going to be on the same page, whether the two of you like it or not, or you can call it quits. Are we clear?"

Cameron takes a moment to absorb this, but reluctantly nods and says, "Yeah...we're clear." Cameron takes his leave, with Jake following behind him as they make their way to the ring.

First Match: Ethan Lang and Cameron Harper vs. The Royal Effect
Well, this isn't exactly the team for Lang and Harper to be tackling when they've got the issues they have right now. To Lang's credit, he's professional about the matter and handles the brunt of the work. Harper half-heartedly plays cheerleader in his corner with the framed picture as Lang plays face-in-peril. Things take a turn when Lang gets his second wind, escaping from McKay's attempt at the Mass Effect and delivering a drop kick to McKay's back, sending him forward and causing him to collide with Harper and knock him off the apron. THE FRAMED PICTURE IS SHATTERED!!! Cameron is livid and on the verge of a breakdown as he can't believe what's happened! He looks back to the ring in a fury as Lang continues his comeback. Harper is reinvigorated and slides into the ring with a furvor. Moses McKay is oblivious to Harper's appearance behind him! Harper grabs McKay, shoves him out of the way AND NAILS ETHAN LANG!!! WTF IS HE DOING?!?!?!?! Jake Connelly is just as befuddled as the rest of us as he watches Harper assault his partner! Harper lifts Lang up and hits the Cam Jam! What the hell is going on?!? Cameron slides out of the ring and starts to leave, beckoning Jake Connelly to come with him and leave Ethan Lang. Meanwhile, Moses McKay capitalizes on this turn of events and covers Lang to get the pin. Connelly can't believe what he's just witnessed and climbs into the ring to check on Lang. Harper continues to plead his case to Connelly, but Connelly isn't having it, choosing to stay with Lang as the latter starts to come to. Harper eventually decides to climb back into the ring, standing over Ethan Lang. Lang looks up at Harper as Connelly is shouting at the latter. It's for naught as Harper nails Lang with the broken picture frame sending him back down to the canvas before he leaves in disgust. What the hell was this all about? A question for another time as Jake Connelly and officials tend to Ethan Lang. *****, 95% overall.

Backstage, we catch up with the number one contender to the Cruiserweight Championship, Neil Quint! He's asked about what it feels like to have this opportunity at such an early stage in his career. Neil counters that it's never too early for something like this. "When you're good, you're good. That's what championships are actually supposed to be about, rewarding excellence and finding out who's the best. It's not about whatever circus Michael Hotbody wants to bring every time he shows up. The details may change, but at the end of the day you know that with him, you're getting a clown show. With Neil Quint, you're getting the best. And unlike how Hotbody weaseled his way towards that belt so quickly into his career, I'm actually going to earn that Cruiserweight Title. Hotbody, tell your crew to start folding up the tents because the show's over at the Royal Rumble."

This looks like the perfect time for Luscious to come into the picture and steal some time to provide a rebuttal. Luscious points out that the belt is already around the waist of the best. "Until you've been put the ringer like my boo, Mikey-Poo, you don't have a leg to stand on, Neil!" she claims. "Everything from cage matches to submission matches to fatal four-ways to tables and ladders and chairs and everything in between, Michael Hotbody has been through the fire and come out looking stronger and better than before!"

"Then what's with all the nonsense of him trying to get this match cancelled?" Quint asks.

"Hey, Michael isn't afraid of you anymore than he's afraid of any other person he's conquered! Michael just wants the WWE to show integrity and honesty when promoting its matches to the people. If there's one thing Michael can't stand, it's a liar! You were GIVEN this match and we just all want to be sure that you didn't get it based on a lie! If you don't have a spotless record like Lisa Benton claims you have, then you shouldn't get the match!"

"It says a lot when this alleged brave champion needs you to do all of his talking for him. As far as my record goes, it's WAAAAAAAAY cleaner than a woman like you!"

Luscious is AGHAST at this accusation from Neil and her subsequent gasp in reaction to it is so great it causes her hand to shoot up and across Neil's face in an action one could theoretically describe as a slap. Neil seems to think it's an act of aggression and starts to move in towards Luscious. Luscious is evidently confused as to how Neil could have misconstrued such an action and backs away as Neil follows. Fortunately, Michael Hotbody comes around the corner to hopefully explain things, but Neil bumps face-first into Michael's Cruiserweight Title. Neil is clearly in no position for Michael's explanation to have any bearing so the champ and Luscious take their leave.

Second Match: Dusk vs. Cordelia Capriati vs. Jenna Kyle vs. Carmella Costello
It's announced that the winner of this match will go to the Royal Rumble as the number one contender to Sonya Braddock's Women's Title and speak of the devil, she is here and she joins the announce team to watch.

Brooke is with Carmella as the first people to come to the ring and she uses this time to run down the champion as well as the rest of the competitors. "First, a message to Seth Von Kamp, the FORMER Intercontinental Champion. Ronnie has asked me to pass this along, as he's far too busy being a very important figure now that he's the NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION! Ronnie wants Seth to know that there are no hard feelings. Ronnie didn't really want to be the one to have to put an end to the storybook tale that was your miraculous title reign, Seth. Unfortunately, my new initiative doesn't leave a whole lot of room for sappiness and all that noise. All that matters is bringing all the gold to my side of the tracks. Seth, you were the first victim of this bold movement, but rest assured that you won't be the last. Which brings us to tonight and the Royal Rumble. Sonya Braddock, I trust that you clutched your belt just a little bit tighter when you saw the end to SmackDown! on Friday. You realize that I'm dead serious about my clients going on the hunt for all the champions here in the WWE. You sit there and you watch as it starts to hit you that my goal starts to become more and more real. Carmella is going to walk all over her competition in this match! Look at who we've got. Let's start with Dusk. Dusk, sorry, no offense, but it's just way too soon for you to be in a match like this with stakes like this. Jenna Kyle is nothing more than a pathetic Barbie doll who doesn't even deserve this chance after already blowing it at Bragging Rights. And then there's Cordelia. There may be a special place in hell for traitors, but I've always been more keen on my own brand of punishment. Cordelia, Carmella is more talented than you and she has all the motivation she needs to wipe the floor with you anytime! Seth Von Kamp was victim number one; Cordelia, appropriately enough, you get the honor of being number two!"

Brooke is certainly wordy tonight, but the time for words gets thrown out the window as this match gets underway. Luckily, I've got four talented women tussling here, with Jenna being the anchor keeping things in line. Braddock offers her thoughts on the competitors throughout the match as she watches. Things come to a head when Dusk and Jenna spill to the outside in front of Braddock. Dusk gives Braddock the stink eye and the two have words. The ref tries to calm things down and get Dusk back into the match. Brooke uses this chance to slide some brass knuckles to Carmella. Sophie Waters goes over to Brooke to give her some attitude in response. Jenna manages to slip out of the grasp of Dusk as Dusk tries to send her into the ring post. Jenna shoves Dusk into said ring post, knocking her out of the equation. Jenna rejoins Carmella and Cordelia in the ring as Cordelia has Carmella waistlocked, unaware of the knuckles in Carmella's possession. Jenna waistlocks Cordelia as it looks like we're going to get a double German suplex. Cordelia elbows Jenna to get out of the predicament, but that allows Carmella to get free and she turns around to KO Cordelia with the knux as the ref is checking on Jenna. Carmella covers Cordelia and that's going to give her the win and the number one contender status. Braddock looks less than impressed as Brooke and Carmella celebrate. ****1/2, 91% overall.

The next inductee for this year's Hall of Fame is...Jason Collins! The multiple time World Champion and father to current WWE Superstar Chris Collins takes his place among the rest of the greats the night before WrestleMania, joining Lisa Benton for this year's class. He will be inducted by Pete Shapiro.

Third Match: Kerry Cemenko and Eddy Clash vs. Chris Collins and Hugo
Kyle Jacobs joins the announce team to offer his views on Chris Collins during this match. Chris Collins gets on the stick before the match, wanting to talk about his dad. "I bet you all think I should feel some kind pride over the news of my deadbeat loser father getting fluffed and praised by a bunch of other deadbeat losers for the Hall of Fame, huh? Let me be perfectly clear on this: I DON'T GIVE A DAMN. I'm too busy crafting my own story, my own Hall of Fame career, and I'm doing it without making the same dumb mistakes my father did! Pete Shapiro, I sure as hell wasn't going to do the induction, because I wasn't going to be some puppet blowing smoke up everyone's ass! Quite frankly, every person who takes part in that night and fawns over my dad and whatever crap comes out of his mouth should be ashamed of themselves and that includes any of you fans!"

Chris Collins glares at the crowd as they proceed to boo him. He then turns his attention to Kyle Jacobs. "You see that, Kyle? THAT'S how you handle yourself as the offspring of a famous family. Take matters into your hands and live for yourself because that's the only way you're even going to come close to a legacy like mine. And you've got the best seat in the house to watch this match because there's plenty more to learn!"

This is the part where we talk about how awesome this match is. Eddy and Hugo, of course, are down with continuing their kaiju antics. Things come to an end as things break down after the hot tag with the two giants brawling on the outside, leaving Chris and Kerry as the legal men. The ref can only watch Eddy and Hugo slug it out, allowing Chris Collins to slip out of the ring to grab a chair. Chris hops back on the apron, looking to get back into the ring, but Kyle Jacobs leaves the announce table to take the chair out of Chris's hand. Chris turns his attention to Kyle in anger, but Eddy is back in action, having sent Hugo into the steps. Eddy brings Chris back in via a belly-to-back suplex, folding up poor Chris, and that leaves him open to a Curb Stomp from Kerry and the pin fall afterward is academic. Kyle walks off, eyes on the beaten Chris Collins as he leaves. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Fourth Match: Bonnie Beckham vs. Bobbi Jo
Nathan Quinn announces that the match between his Southern Belles and the Perfections for the Women's Tag Team Titles at the Royal Rumble is going to be contested under Tornado Rules. He claims it's fitting as it's two teams, no excuses. He again complains about the titles being stolen by Bonnie and Leah. "The Perfections are far from perfect. I know them because I made them and they think that they can get even for me dumping them by stealing what rightfully belongs to the Southern Belles! The Royal Rumble is where Hannah and Bobbi Jo put an end to this charade!"

Well, this match is no charade. It's fucking sweet as hell. To think under other circumstances, namely not having the women's tag division, these two probably would've suffered from a roster purge a long time ago. Thankfully I had the tremendous idea of doing this division. :shifty: Ahem...anyway, a fucking great match comes out of this pairing as we get a preview of what's to come at the Rumble. We get our finish in the form of Nathan drawing the ref's attention as the ref questions him about possibly putting Bobbi Jo's foot on the bottom rope to stop the count. Nathan proclaims innocence but this is opening for Hannah McCormick to come on down and slide a guitar to her partner, unbeknownst to Bonnie, who has joined the ref in the questioning. Bonnie eventually turns her attention back to Bobbi Jo, who takes the guitar and El Kabongs poor Bonnie, shattering it. Hannah helps gets rid of the evidence and Nathan eventually backs down, allowing the ref to get back to the match and see Bobbi Jo covering the KO'd Bonnie and count the pin. Well, you had to know the country gals would draw inspiration from Jeff Jarrett. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Backstage we go again with Simon Bennett and his manager Paul Andrews. They remind everyone about the match between Bennett and Wrakk for the Unified World Title is, indeed, on for the Royal Rumble. Bennett claims that perhaps Adam Hail had the right idea. "All of this trouble and all of the pageantry surrounding coming back to the WWE after all these years, I might as well make it mean something. This man next to me put a lot of work into getting me back into the thick of things here. This man believed that there was more for me to do in the world of wrestling. Now who am I to refuse such a stamp of approval? Wrakk, I don't know much about landscapes or creating art or whatever it is you've been on about for these past few months. The only picture I want people to take away from all of this is the image of me holding up that WWE Unified World Title at the Royal Rumble. It'll be a picture of the absolute best and a picture where anyone looking at it will say to themselves, 'Damn, right there is a champion. That right there is a guy who went through hell.' Contrary to what you may believe, Wrakk, I came back at the absolute right time."

Fifth Match: The Love Connection vs. The Future Foundation
This was set up on SmackDown! after Aphrodite had a run-in with Vivian Merrick. These two, along with the Royal Effect, have been aiming for the Unified Tag Team Titles held by the Wyldhearts. Speaking of which, the champions themselves park themselves in the aisle to observe. So we get a fucking amazing encounter, which unfortunately is going to get ruined. Coleman and Hilton are legal for their respective teams, but BONZO GONZO ensues, resulting in all four men on the outside, right in front of the champions. The Future Foundation see fit to be offended at the presence of the champions and some words are exchanged. The ref comes over and orders the Wyldhearts to leave. They do comply and the ref goes to try to break up Greene and Merrick, but Hilton uses this chance to shove Blaine Bellamey as he's going back up the ramp. Blaine responds by charging Hilton, but causes Coleman to get squashed against the apron. Robbie pulls Blaine off of Hilton, trying to get him to leave with him. Hilton sends Coleman back into the ring and small packages him to score a cheap pinfall. Post-match, the Royal Effect comes running down to get themselves a piece of the Wyldhearts and we go to break with a massive four team brawl. *****, 95% overall.

I mean, God damn.

Sixth Match: ???
Lyle Morris comes down to the ring with a referee in tow. They enter the ring and Lyle takes the mic and reiterates his claim that his cousin, Chet, is a damn coward. "Now, Chet, I may not know you anymore, but I haven't gone through some BS transformation. I'm still the same so you do know me, and you know that it's not in me to just pack it in. I'm still coming for your ass and I'm not hoping to beat some sense into you! I'm not looking to rescue you! I'm looking to do something that's been long overdue, and that's put a smile on my face for the first time in a long time. And if kicking your ass to get me some payback is what it takes, so be it! So get your ass out here right now so we can get this out of the way because I'm not stopping, Chet!"

It takes a while but Chet Morris does come out to the stage to reply to Lyle. He has a mic and gives his thoughts on all this. "Lyle, I don't want you to misunderstand me. Fighting you is absolutely on my agenda. I need to completely bury you in my past as it's a necessary step for me to move forward. However, I'm choosing to do it on my terms. Of course, there is another path forward, and that is if you, Lyle, open your heart enough to forgive me and just step aside, blessing me with your approval of my decision. One way doesn't end well for you. The other way REALLY doesn't end well for you."

Lyle, of course, pretty much says that's absurd and that Chet can stick this new philosophical crap he's on up his ass. Chet merely shakes his head and says that's a very disappointing answer. "Maybe you should take it up with the man himself." And with that statement the music of Victor Dark hits and the man himself comes on out with Andrea and they make their way to the ring. Victor climbs in, looks at the referee, and gestures for him to call for the bell. The ref checks with Lyle and he has no qualms about it, so this shit is on!

Sixth Match: Victor Dark vs. Lyle Morris
This is Victor's second match and he's just as impressive here as he was in his debut. Lyle is game, but it's an uphill battle as it doesn't look like he fully grasps what he's up against. Plus, he's evidently got Chet still on his mind as every so often he turns his attention to his cousin who is still on the stage observing. Lyle manages to get Victor in position for his Cajun Spice, but Victor catches him in mid-air and turns it into the Darkness Falls and that's going to give Victor his second win via pin. Afterwards, Chet comes down to stand over his cousin's body with a look of disappointment on his face. More drama! ****1/4, 87% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Seth Von Kamp vs. Butch Fleming
Might as well end with a banger. This is Butch's first match on a Raw since before SummerSlam. I say working with an opponent like Seth is a good way to get the ring rust off of you. Both men are spirited as they look to take out their respective grievances against each other. Seth looks like he's got Butch right where he wants him, but Ronnie Costello comes down to the ring, apparently not busy anymore. Seth looks like he's going to try the Collapse of Society on Butch, but he notices Ronnie at ringside, flaunting the Intercontinental Title belt in Seth's face. Seth is too furious to think straight and he makes a lunge at Ronnie, who backs away, and Butch pounces by coming up from behind Seth and nailing him with the Slaughterhouse Special. That right there is going to be enough for the pin for Butch, making this a successful return match.

Afterward, Ronnie slides into the ring to hold the title belt over Seth, followed by putting some boots to the former champion. Alexander Piero makes himself known by coming down, looking to even things out and trying to get a piece of Butch Fleming for what he did to him. Piero stomps at Butch in the corner until Ronnie gets all up in his grill all "WTF, bro?". Piero confronting this interruption leaves him open to Butch clipping his knee from behind and a double beatdown on the two faces commences. We close with the new Intercontinental Champion and the 29th entrant in the Rumble standing victorious. *****, 95% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%

Yeah, eat shit, DUD show.

The amount of 5 star matches remains staggering.

Butch promos are so amusing. Such a grouchy dickhead, perfect upper card heel to throw into the mix of things.

Love that we're so far into the future that current roster members have parents who were under your employ who were also in-game creations.

Morris feud is fun too - feuding cousins isn't something you see too often. Imagine if WWF made a massive deal of a Hardcore vs. Crash feud.