The damn dud show strikes again. It's meant to only be a 1 in 25 chance but alas when all of your shows matter there's no hope of the dud show being "wasted" on the secondary/tertiary show.

I love when a babyface shows up clearly worse for wear but still wants to fight. It's a nice juxtaposition with heels who get injured and milk it for all it's worth.

With G&F's brilliant guidance, Hotbody will soon be wearing Demiras and LaSalle's ring gear when he literally sues the pants off of them.

An 89% match rating on a dud show is pretty well unheard of, and speaks volumes to how over they are and how hot the feud was. May have very well flirted with 100% on a non-dud show.

:eek: With the pure talent involved I thought everyone on your roster would be immune from the "this match is a letdown compared to the last" programming logic.

I love that finish, if it happens one time too many C4 could destroy Brooke for clearly having conflicting priorities.

I also appreciate managers having multiple clients and functioning as, well, actual sports agents.

Reigns just wants to get his baby back (baby back baby back baby back Chili's baby back ribs)

I had a fairly enjoyable journey to another planet with Kris Statlander and now it's back for another week of programming.

https://64.media.tumblr.com/fa24bb5d...2158e7e62f.jpg


AEW Dark: May 25, 2021:
-Karl Anderson def. Marko Stunt
-Jurassic Express def. Private Party
-Matt Sydal def. Peter Avalon
-FTR def. Alex Reynolds and John Silver
-Kris Statlander def. Allie
-Miro def. Joey Janela

It was another non-clicking Dark despite some solid in-ring work, but I breathe a sigh of relief in hopes that I'll be in the clear for Dynamite and Double or Nothing.

I also receive a notice that Jack Evans has suffered a Torn Calf and will be out for 9 months. Given that he just turned 39 and his main in-ring quality is speed......yeah, that doesn't bode well for him unfortunately.


AEW Dynamite: May 26, 2021

We have sort of a NJPW influenced Dynamite tonight in that we've got several big multi-man tags so as to avoid giving away too much, keeping people fresh, and not burning anybody out before the PPV.


Segment 1:

A trios match kicks us off as the surprising return of Trent? last week leads to the logical progression of Best Friends and Orange Cassidy facing off against Team Taz. Brian Cage and Powerhouse Hobbs as the two strongest men in the match make Trent?'s return a living hell in the early going before the face squad can get some momentum. Fun trios action, Orange does a tope suicida on the outside to Cage and Hobbs and lives to pay the price and the two big guys are focused on weakening him for Saturday, leaving Starks alone in the ring to take a Strong Zero from Best Friends as the faces get the win. ***, 77% overall


Segment 2:

Kenny Omega and Don Callis join us LIVE via satellite. The AEW World Champion and his challenger PAC were both ordered by Kurt Angle to stay home tonight to ensure they are in peak physical condition for their Iron Man match on Saturday, but there is undue speculation that Callis played a part in it. Either way PAC should consider himself lucky because Kenny totally would've waffled him with the gold like he has so many times in the past. 83% overall


Segment 3:

SCU's Scorpio Sky vs. Shawn Spears from Tully's crew. The match serves a dual purpose of adding to the build to the SCU vs. FTR tag match on Saturday and also gives both of these men a chance to build to their participation in the Casino Battle Royale. SCU's attempts to intervene are thwarted by Daniels and Kazarian which sets Sky up for a flash pin victory. **3/4, 74% overall


Segment 4:

We're backstage with Cody and Dustin ahead of their monumentally important match tonight. They are watching footage from AEW's very first show - Double or Nothing 2019, just two days shy of being exactly two years ago. On that show, Cody faced off against Dustin in a critically acclaimed war that saw them pull out the Dustiest match they could.

Dustin was sporting the crimson mask that night and fully prepared to retire after that match, but Cody offered to bring him along for the ride in AEW and he's never looked back. He has no regrets about the last two years he's spent in the company, and he's not ready to hang 'em up. He wants to keep his career going, but he also wants to see MJF get his ass kicked. He won't get everything he wants, but he does know that if he doesn't give Cody the fight of his life tonight, he'll be doing him a disservice. 82% overall


Segment 5:

In a preview of some of the chaos we could expect in the Casino Battle Royale - ten of the participants paired off in odd combinations as Darby Allin, Lance Archer, and Matt Sydal along with "Hangman" Adam Page and Colt Cabana of the Dark Order did battle against the Inner Circle's Jake Hager and Sammy Guevara plus Eddie Kingston, Karl Anderson, and "Big Money" Matt Hardy.

A lot of unique pairings in the ring but also previous rivalries being revisited as Darby charged at Sammy as soon as the bell rang, still with a score to settle after Sammy played a role in ending Sting's career. Meanwhile the self proclaimed toughest man in wrestling Eddie Kingston had no problems tagging out as soon as rival Lance Archer tagged in, leading to an Archer vs. Hager hoss fight instead. All the while, Matt Hardy made ill attempts to schmooze with all of his partners and convince them to leave their respective groups and sign with the Matt Hardy Brand instead.

As always, hell eventually breaks loose with bodies flying everywhere. Especially Darby's as he showed completely reckless abandon, performing a Coffin Drop onto most of the competitors. Eddie Kingston and Colt Cabana are the legal men, Eddie whipped into the corner and Colt attempts a Flying Asshole but it misses, Eddie backfists Colt into oblivion and the heels get the W. ***1/4, 81% overall


Segment 6:

After the bell, the brawl spills back into the ring with everyone throwing haymakers as Eddie slithers out of the ring. The toughest man in wrestling grabs a mic and while safely escaping through the crowd talks mad shit about everyone in the ring. 81% overall


Segment 7:

Awesome Kong gets her final tune-up ahead of Saturday's title defense, facing her former Nightmare Collective partner Mel. Mel is pretty much a total afterthought in real life AEW and actually hasn't wrestled since last year, all AEW talent were given the chance to opt out of pandemic tapings and she has yet to return. In this game though she has use as she's a solid brawler and gels well with Kong. Kong however dispatches of her with the Soul Collector and Nyla Rose jumps her after the bell with Vickie Guerrero barking orders. ***, 75% overall


Segment 8:

Miro and Jon Moxley were also ordered away from the building by Angle, if only to avoid them killing each other before the PPV. Miro has taken his night off to do a live reaction to Dynamite on his Twitch stream, we check in with him only for Moxley to find a way to tap into his Stream and deliver a scathing warning for what's to come on Saturday. Considering they're both over and charasmatic a "confrontation" angle between the two didn't go as well as I hoped. Guess the fans want to see them fight, not talk. 78% overall


Segment 9:

Our final multi-man tag match of the evening. With MJF forcing Cody to compete tonight, Angle wasn't going to let MJF have a full night off for himself. It's Inner Circle's MJF, Wardlow, and #1 contenders Santana and Ortiz vs. AEW Tag champion Young Bucks and Dark Order's Evil Uno and Stu Grayson who were cheated out of a win last week.

Another fun multi-man on a show full with them, nobody has to go too hard but everyone gets their shit in. Uno and Grayson handle Santana and Ortiz on the outside and MJF thinks better of intervening any further, leaivng his bodyguard Wardlow to take a pair of Superkicks from the Bucks for the face win. ***1/4, 81% overall


Segment 10:

Our final interview of the evening, also LIVE via satellite, sees PAC deliver his closing remarks to Kenny Omega. After all he's done to PAC over the past 3 months, Kenny should just consider himself lucky that he'll only have to be brutalized for 30 minutes. 87% overall


Segment 11:

Brother vs. Brother, Rhodes vs. Rhodes in our emotional main event with high stakes. In a matter befitting of Dusty, this would've been primarily an old school brawl with one or both men getting color and a nice bevy of false finishes. Sadly this didn't hold a candle to their real life encounter from two years ago but given Dustin's age and the amount his skills eroded after his birthday in-game, he still churned out a more than respectable performance in this final run including here and the crowd was into it (85%) which is not bad at all for a guy who at this stage is pretty low on the totem pole.

Cody kicks out of Final Reckoning, much to Dustin's shock. Dustin tries to see through the blood and pick him up to do another but Cody slides off and ends up behind him, Cross Rhodes. 1-2-3 and Cody wins while immediately sinking into Dustin's chest in sadness.

The two share an emotional embrace as the crowd applauds. Cody takes his leave allowing Dustin to soak up the adulation from the crowd as they chant "Thank you Dustin". In a nod to the old school wrestling traditions, Dustin takes off his boots and leaves them in the center of the ring. The Rhodes Brothers walk up the ramp together and hold each other's hands high. MJF and Wardlow jump them from behind to rob the emotional moment away and get nuclear heat. JR and Tony Schiavone say MJF can go to hell as we go off the air! ***, 82% overall


80% overall rating for Dynamite

Double or Nothing Card:

AEW World Championship - 30 Minute Iron Man Match
"The Bastard" PAC vs. "The Cleaner" Kenny Omega (C)

AEW Women's World Championship
"The Native Beast" Nyla Rose vs. Awesome Kong (C)

AEW TNT Championship
"Freshly Squeezed" Orange Cassidy vs. "The Machine" Brian Cage (C)

AEW World Tag Team Championship
Santana and Ortiz vs. The Young Bucks (C)

If MJF wins, Cody surrenders the Rhodes name
Maxwell Jacob Friedman vs. "The American Nightmare" Cody Rhodes

Jon Moxley vs. Miro

SCU (Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian) vs. FTR (Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler)

21-Man Casino Battle Royale - winner receives AEW Title shot at All Out
Featuring Adam Page, Colt Cabana, Darby Allin, Eddie Kingston, Jake Hager, Karl Anderson, Lance Archer, Matt Hardy, Matt Sydal, Sammy Guevara, Scorpio Sky, Shawn Spears and more!

Checking out Uranus, no doubt...

The dud show is always lurking, ready to strike and be an asshole about things and ruining your hard work.

I should be thanking the gods that none of my top guys have suffered anything major in regards to injuries. Now I just jinxed it...

So, wait, is Trent? is his actual name? Like, what does that even mean?

LOL, I love that heel trope of them acting tough when they're not in the same vicinity as their rival. It's shades of the old "I could do that...if I FELT like it" bit.

Wait, aren't Daniels and Kazarian SCU?


It's kind of weird that this is a promotion that's been around for two years and I've never seen a minute of it. Although I can absolutely picture the two of them doing a segment like this.

Kingston and Hardy are the MVPs of this match with their awesome douchenessity. It doesn't appear Page brought out anything absurdly expensive this time around so I'll imagine that he brought custom Dark Order merchandise for the rest of his partners to wear.

Well, obviously he has to do it from that location. Clearly he would have just been bumping into people if he'd stayed in the ring....


I'd have to imagine that right now, more than any other time, is a shit time to be in the professional wrestling business if you're looking for a steady stream of reliable income and the pandemic would have just aggravated that. I wonder how some of these guys and gals are making out.

Oh, I fucking HATE that shit when you've got two guys who you think would draw a good rating because of their stats but the game just decides it doesn't give a fuck. I swear to Ash I've lost count as to how many segments I've done that have been in the shitter despite all participants being at 85 or over in terms of charisma. I've found that it affects people who don't have the Superstar Look stat checked more than those who do. I'm also amused at the idea of someone who looks like Miro/Rusev doing a Twitch stream and playing something like Shantae or Little Big Planet.


MJF just had a cramp and had to walk to off. Those things can be crippling if you don't take of it right away....

SWERVE! Angle makes it a 60-minute Iron Man Match at the 11th hour!

SCHIAVONE WITH THE BASH AT THE BEACH '96 REFERENCE!!! I absolutely would have done the same thing with the heels. I guess Wardlow was very understanding of MJF's cramp situation.

Really though this demonstrates the double-edged sword with guys who are clearly past their prime still going on and wanting to go out on one final big glorious bang. Yes, it makes for a great moment on paper but in practice, not so much. Flair vs. HBK at WM 24 and Austin vs. Rock at WM 19 or any of Terry Funk's 233 retirement matches are examples of this. Although, if it's good enough for the participants who am I to judge?

Yeah that's definitely the one. Can a planet be described as "juicy"? Because, well, yeah :drool: [/quote]


Yeah I've been fortunate that I've only lost Dark regulars so far. Evans has worked his way up to like a 76 overall which is pretty great considering he started in the low 60s, he's been working mostly on Dark but churning out great performances with tag partner Angelico which has allowed both of them to steadily climb in overness, EWR usually will let guys build into like the 80s overness on match quality alone before you have to then actually push them in an angle.

That said this injury is a big setback for him, without the game in front of me right now I don't remember how devastating it was but I think his speed is now in the low 70s and that was his best stat. I don't cut people during injury but he might not have a practical spot to return to if Angelico keeps climbing in his stead.


Yep indeed.

https://i.imgur.com/DmHzS7B.png

I don't know the actual backstory. I know he worked under a differently spelled version of his WWE name (Trent Beretta) as well but I think that was too close to actually put on American TV. Given the Best Friends being portrayed as a bunch of slackers I totally could see him being asked for his name and being like "uhh...I dunno...Trent?" and it stuck.

Side story. At one point last year, Santana and Ortiz were feuding with Best Friends and one of the heels worked the angle online by going at Trent's actual mom Sue on Twitter. They eventually have a parking lot brawl which the Best Friends win. Sue herself then drives up to the parking lot in her soccer mom SUV and and the Best Friends (including a bloody Trent) simply get in and they drive off as if they were just getting picked up from practice. That visual cracked me up.


Yeah I love that stuff. I generally don't have the creative wherewithal to actually script out full promos like I saw people doing in their EWR diaries back on EW Battleground, but if I can just capture the tone and gist of what is being said that's good enough for me.


Oops, yeah I meant to say FTR. Too many abbreviations here. Also I don't proofread :o


"And the official Dark Order underwear too..."


AEW, to their credit, pays its contracted wrestlers as employees including benefits etc and they paid out workers during the pandemic who either didn't feel comfortable participating or couldn't travel.

In the very early days of the pandemic they spent a weekend filming 5 or 6 weeks of Dynamite in Cody Rhodes and QT Marshall's wrestling school in Georgia. People like Mox, Hangman Page, Matt Hardy etc chose not to participate and all of the talent based out of New York (MJF, Santana and Ortiz, Statlander etc) and California (Young Bucks, SCU, Jungle Boy etc) had no way to fly with those states shutting down flights. They taped enough matches with a skeleton crew and supplemented it with promos sent in by the wrestlers stuck at home. Several of the extras who worked those tapings made the most of it and ended up getting signed.

I believe NJPW, ROH, and a bunch of others paid everyone their per show wages as well even when there were no shows happening at all. WWE was the only place that did wholesale cuts. I imagine indy wrestlers had a tough go of it and many turned to Twitch and other streaming ventures to try to keep their "brand" afloat.


Hmm...I forgot all about the Superstar Look box but that could absolutely play a part in it. I know you get dinged if you try to book a non-intimidating wrestler in an angle where having a killer is required, and that the Fonz Factor automatically adds points to segments, but didn't know the extent to which Superstar Look impacted things.


Dustin's said that he really was going into DON 2019 expecting it to be his swan song. Cody straight after the match got on the mic and cut an emotional promo asking Dustin to be his tag partner at the next PPV and it was a shoot, Dustin didn't know he was gonna be offered another match or a spot in the company. So they hugged it out and it made for a really cool organic moment.

Given he helps as a trainer and is still a capable hand helping out the young guys I think he'll be sticking around for a decent while, not sure he's the type that would want a sendoff let alone another Cody match when they'd have a near impossible task topping the first. But given I had to act quickly in the game I felt it made sense.

Oh yeah, I forgot what my image rating is offhand but I started the game as a National promotion which is why I'm able to sign written deals. The industry is currently booming (if only) and has for most of the game. A new cult promotion (NYCW) formed and is quickly rising, AAA got to national level as well some time ago. WWE is probably at the tippy top of the rating scale by this point even though they cut a million people and thir 90 day non-competes I honor as one of my house rules have now elapsed if I choose to sign anyone they discarded. Not like I have a big PPV coming up to debut someone.......:shifty:

I'm in the upper 90s I think, and there would seem to be a good chance I get to global level if I churn out a good PPV.

SmackDown!: August 31, 2040

Final show of the month! Things have gone well enough to where I'm not regretting moving over to 4.2. I'm sure that will change when some other random thing decides to take Jenna and/or Faith from me for whatever fucking reason. Let's try to finish the month of August on a high note!

We open with the FIRST EVER WWE Women's Tag Team Champions, The Lonely Girls. Seeing as we're in Faith's home country of Canada she is of course over as fuck. Faith takes the time to get a sweeping shot of the crowd on the Runner Cam as part of this, presumably, celebration. Jenna is tolerated as Faith vouches for her even though the last time they were both in Canada she got booed mercilessly. Faith says that it's a whole new set of circumstances between her and Jenna and that it should be taken as a sign that things, no matter how hard you may fight against it, are subject to change. It's inevitable and there's no need to look any further than what the two of them are holding in their possession as proof of that. Jenna talks about what a historical night it was at SummerSlam. Things have been so hectic this last week that she and Faith haven't really had the time to soak it all in and actually enjoy the fruits of their labors. Well, they're taking the night off as it's a Friday and Faith told Jenna that Toronto has got some of the hottest spots on the town when it comes to Canada. Tonight will be a night for revelry and maybe some drunken karaoke. But they haven't forgotten their responsibilities. They know that there is an ocean full of sharks ready to strike and try to stake their claim to this new championship. The Lonely Girls will be waiting and ready. Faith puts an exclamation point on this spiel by pointing out that if her and Jenna fought like hell to win the belts, you can be damn sure they'll fight twice as hard to keep them. Until then, Toronto, let's have ourselves a hell of a time! The segment ends with Jenna and Faith playing to the crowd and making their exit through the arena while interacting with the people.

Backstage, we're joined by the lovely Luscious and her man, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody and Zed Jones! Hotbody wants to talk about those two criminals, Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle, making a mess of things on Raw. Nobody invited Jordan Demiras back unless Martyn LaSalle wants to fess up to it. And if he did invite Demiras back, there needs to be SERIOUS INQUIRIES into what sort of hijinx they're up to! Hotbody isn't a lying fraud. Hotbody actually announces when he'll be showing up because he wants the fans to know when to tune in to see him. He's not about deception and flirting with legal woes unlike those two delinquents. There is an 8-man main event tonight but Hotbody wants to make it clear that LaSalle and Demiras have no further business with him as they've both been conquered and vanquished. They should consider this their only warning as after tonight Hotbody wants nothing to do with them anymore!

First Match: Shawn Dangerson vs. Romeo Valiente
Sophie Waters joins the commentary team to talk about the challenge she laid out to Luscious in regards to the Cruiserweight Title. Hotbody has bigger problems on his hands than just Demiras and LaSalle is Shawn Dangerson manages to get a title shot. This is a hell of an opener as Valiente is a great veteran and knows what to do to put a guy over. Dangerson continues his path of destruction with another tap out win via the Danger Zone. *****. 94% overall.

Second Match: WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey and Eclypse vs. The Jersey Experience
The heels don't look like they're quite on the same page. Naomi talks about how upset she is over what happened at SummerSlam. History was ripped from her and there needs to be consequences for that! She rips Jenna and Faith for using tonight as an excuse to party while she's stuck here with Eclypse. They had better find the time to watch her tonight and what she does, though, because they'll be getting the same. Anyways, the match unfolds with Eclypse more often than not looking like she's not thrilled with what Naomi said. It boils down to Frankie and Naomi as things break down. Frankie tries a running charge but Naomi 'accidentally' pulls Eclypse into the path and the champion capitalizes by hitting Frankie with the Bail Out to score the pin. Eclypse continues to look upset. ****1/2, 93%

Backstage, Lisa Benton wants to give an update on the condition of the Unified World Champion Noah Carmichael. She still hasn't received any word from Carmichael's doctors as to whether or not he's cleared to compete so once again, unfortunately, he's not here tonight. She is waiting with baited breath to get that green light so that she can move forward with setting him up with a challenger at Unforgiven. Brooke interrupts things and declares that the person that Benton is considering making Carmichael's challenger had better be Salvatore Scabbia. Nobody on the roster right now has the record of Scabbia! Nobody has Carmichael's number like Scabbia! What exactly is Benton afraid of? Trying to protect Carmichael is pointless because after Scabbia gets done with him, he's going to be back in the same spot that he is now: broken, busted up, and hopeless. Benton tells Brooke to cool her jets because her ambition might come back to bite her in the ass. Benton knows how eager Brooke is to have a Unified World Champion as a client but maybe she should brush up on her coaching and managing skills. How about her boys The Academy take on The Wyldhearts tonight?

Third Match: Quentin McDaniels vs. El Silencio
Not much here other than giving McDaniels a strong outing, hampered by Silencio's low charisma. They get through fine enough as McDaniels scores a clean pin after the Great Depression. ****1/2, 91% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with the NEW Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp. Much like the Women's Tag Team Champions earlier tonight, Seth claims that he's yet to really grasp what it meant to capture the championship at SummerSlam. Nine long years of busting his ass in this company, not counting the years of training and scraping by to even get noticed by this company, and now he stands here with his first singles title. The first and he certainly hopes not the last as there's always that bigger fish out there. He doesn't know when Noah Carmichael will be back in action and he certainly doesn't know who will be the one to challenge him for the Unified World Title but should the opportunity arise, Seth Von Kamp knows that the impossible can happen and he'll gladly take that championship, too. There's just one little hitch and that's the pain in the ass known as Brandon Reigns. Reigns certainly hasn't been taking SummerSlam very well, has he? First he accuses Seth of not being worthy of a shot at the Intercontinental Title, then he accuses Seth of not living up to a champion's responsibilities, and then he just flat out goes nuts and decides to get physical last night on Superstars. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out where Brandon's head is at right now and what it is he wants so Seth will make it very easy for him. Seth stands here, daring Brandon Reigns to give it another go because Seth is ready to be responsible: responsible for making Reigns look like a pansy ass bitch!

Cue Brandon Reigns who's got his hands full of piss and vinegar...and the Money in the Bank briefcase. He tries to run down and take a swing with it but Seth ducks and it flies loose. Seth sets up for the Collapse of Society but Reigns escapes and bails. Seth gets a hold of the briefcase and taunts Reigns with it. Reigns is furious and demands its return so Seth just chucks it into the crowd! Someone got themselves a souvenir! Reigns continues his tantrum on the outside as we go to break.

Fourth Match: Ozzy Mandias vs. Lyle Morris
I've let Ozzy slip through the cracks so I figure get him back on TV as he delivers the cruiserweight goods. Perhaps he can be the one to unseat Hotbody? A question for another time as Lyle Morris gives him more than enough of a challenge here. Ozzy connects with the Blizzard of Oz to pick up the win. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fifth Match: The Wyldhearts vs. The Academy
Brooke once again plays her part as manager as she's in the corner of the Academy. Brooke talks about how there is discussion that she's left some of her other clients out in the rain but she counters that the Academy are proof positive that she's got what it takes to bring people to their fullest potential and become champions. Noah Carmichael isn't here to ruin things for her like he did last night so everyone should just shut and watch how she handles things! This is an evenly contested bout as The Wyldhearts are still looking for those Tag Team Titles and want to look good here. Speaking of which, the champions themselves make their way out to take a gander at things. Brooke gets caught up in a verbal scuffle with Madison on the outside as the Wyldhearts start to gain some momentum. Sadly, The Future Foundation decide to be dicks here and run in for the DQ attack on the Wyldhearts. The Academy don't look too thrilled with both the Future Foundation and Brooke. *****, 94% overall.

Sixth Match: King Kavovit vs. Gavin Jones
Kavovit demands that Michael Haywood be sent to the back in THE INTEREST OF FAIRNESS! Moses McKay sadly can't be here because of the Play Pals' deviousness so it's only right that Jones doesn't have any back up either. Haywood does, indeed, go to the back as Jones assures him that things are OK here. It's another hot match tonight as the feud between these teams is still awesome despite one guy being suspended...er, injured.... Anyways, Kavovit takes advantage of the fact that there's no one in the corner of Jones as he goes for the FOREIGN OBJECT OF EXTREME HUMILIATION and nails Jones to score the cheap win. *****, 99% overall. When I end this feud it's going to be fire.

MAIN EVENT: The Dillingers, Jordan Demiras, and Martyn LaSalle vs. The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody, Zed Jones, and Galino & Farnes
The heels come out in a conga line with Zed leading the way but him not actually dancing and still doing his silent straight man bit. Hotbody brags about the size of his on-screen name display and that there's no one on the opposing team that can even come close to all of those achievements! Hotbody-Mania continues to run wild and there is no one that can stop it! He's got the muscle! He's got the hotness! He's got the brains! And that's not even including his team! He makes out with Luscious until the faces get sick of the whole thing and start the match by attacking the heels. It's a crazy affair as you'd expect as Jordan Demiras looks to shake some of the ring rust off. Ultimately, it's down to Joey Dillinger and Hotbody and Luscious decides to get revenge for her make out session being interrupted and uses the same spray she used on Martyn LaSalle weeks ago. Hotbody capitalizes with the Hot Ticket to pick up the win for his team. His team quickly gets him out of there before anyone else can try to get them some. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Overall show rating: 91%

End of the Month stuff:

Birthdays!!! The following birthdays occured this month: Nathan Quinn (42), Clayton North (28), Mika (22), Isaac Wolff (31), Kerry Cemenko (37), Riott (42), Ozzy Mandias (24), Frankie (26), Xavier Cross (35). Some other people also celebrated but they're developmental/training guys so I'd rather not reveal them just yet.

It's apparently great that we're making money every month! I should hope so. Jenna loves being spoiled.

Got a lot of people whose contracts are coming up, including Riott. I really don't know about keeping her. I don't plan on having her compete and managing seems not on brand for her. I will, however, absolutely re-sign all the others, especially Seth Von Kamp.

Moses McKay and Ziggy Styles are back from suspension. Hopefully, they learned their lesson. Ziggy should job in his first match as extra punishment.

Big Thunder in NXT doesn't want to stay there. His stats aren't completely God awful and he's charismatic so he might have a point.

Other than that, business as usual as we march towards Unforgiven.

The Lonely Girls - celebrating amongst a sea of people and well wishers. I love me an ironic name!

I also like to imagine they worked the post-show dark match...just for you, Toronto!

Galino & Farnes' finisher definitely needs to be changed to SERIOUS INQUIRIES, complete with all caps.

Hella deep cruiserweight division - could dedicate an entire episode of Superstars to a Cruiserweight Open style gauntlet of some kind, except of course nobody could be in more than three matches in a row.

Oh come on Eclypse, take one for the team! It's all about the greater good.

****1/2, 91% overall, "they got through fine enough" :lol: I do wonder the extent to which charisma plays a role in match ratings, I always thought that it mostly impacted interviews and segments whereas matches were based on overness and ring work.

Eww, hope he sanitized his hands thoroughly. Love the idea of the MITB briefcase being chucked into the crowd. Be a funny way to debut somebody actually, a plant in the audience catches the briefcase and attempts to finagle their way onto the active roster because they claim they are owed a title match now.

Hotbody has a line of wrestlers five miles long waiting to wrestle that title away from him, if he ever does lose the title he should just create his own and act like he never lost it.

Christ I hope it's not a non-clicky show when you end the feud, just need that one final percentage point for the full monty!

More goodness here.....straight faced Zed leading the conga line :lol: Luscious had a valid beef for having her makeout session interrupted, would've been hilarious had Hotbody just tagged out and made it effectively a 3 on 4 handicap match as he makes out with Luscious until it's time to tag in and steal a win.

Sooner or later she'll wind a diamond ring the size of the Big Gold Belt.

It's always tough to decide what to do with legends. Not everybody is suited to managing or functioning in a non-wrestling capacity, at the same time it's tough to stomach the idea of them signing with another promotion. I feel like in my WWE games I'd always keep the legends on open contracts or whatever, I'd never use them but it mimics the way WWE sign their wrestlers to "legends deals" and effectively have them on retainer.

I still can't help but picture him as the weird looking offspring of Dolph Ziggler and AJ Styles, probably a very punchable face that could stand to do a job.[/QUOTE]

Getting to mingle with the two of them and take pictures and just generally be blessed to even be in their presence should be good enough. Besides, are you going to say 'no' if they ask for the night off?

It is a much funnier name than just the Cross Examination.

That actually is the plan to determine a number one contender. I also want to do one for the tag team titles. Could you imagine buying a ticket to a show and basically getting like an hour's worth of cruiserweight action>

THE GREATER GOOD! It should be pretty obvious where I'm going with these two. First things first; A SummerSlam rematch???

Low charisma tends to drag the crowd reaction rating down which usually knocks a quarter star off depending on the circumstances. They can still pull an awesome match out of their asses but it's best to stick them in there with someone who can offset the lack of charisma.


I absolutely need to do that. Ugh, but who to pick? And do I immediately do them versus Reigns or stick with the rematch against Seth? Decisions, decisions....

I imagine he's going to have an extremely severe method of coping. Like, Adam Sandler in "The Wedding Singer" but amplified beyond reason.

See, now you jinxed it. :(

God damn it, why didn't I think of that? I'm absolutely using that for the next time I do a tag match involving them. It's like "Make out with Luscious" or "Get smacked around by people who you've repeatedly screwed over and pissed off"? It's a cost-benefit analysis that should be a no-brainer. If these were real people in a real promotion I like to imagine Zed just quietly thinking to himself that he doesn't get paid enough for this shit.

Fuck, just give her the Big Gold Belt.

Looking at the birthdays struck me with the realization that Riott is the same age as Nathan Quinn. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to keep her around for special occasions. Damn sentimental favorites.

Writing this in two posts due to character limit because one of my favorite past times was fantasy booking the Royal Rumble, both for real life booking and EWR games. I’m doing the same thing with the Casino Battle Royale because it’s the same basic concept and I can just visualize how the match will play out.

https://wrestlingheadlines.com/wp-co...1-big-logo.jpg

AEW Double or Nothing
Saturday, May 29, 2021
MGM Grand Garden Arena

THE BUY IN
6-Pack Challenge: Hikaru Shida vs. Kris Statlander vs. Serena Deeb vs. Dr. Britt Baker vs. vs. Allie vs. Penelope Ford

Some bonus women’s action kicks us off on the night as 6 women look to potentially move up the rankings and position themselves as the next challenger to the AEW Women’s Champion. Doubtless all eyes will be on what happens in the Awesome Kong vs. Nyla Rose melee tonight.

The very concept of the 6 pack challenge allows all the ladies to get their own showcase, everyone hits their key spots but nobody can really begin to think about getting a pin with so many people around to stop the pin.

The match eventually breaks down into chaos and fun as per usual with the multi-person matches. Kris Statlander gets Allie alone in the ring as the legal participants, sets her up into position near the corner. Kris climbs up to the top rope and doesn’t see Britt Baker sneak onto the apron and tag Kris’ boot. Kris hits the 451 Splash on Allie, but Baker immediately sneaks in from behind and throws her out of the ring before stealing the pin for herself! Brilliant move from the doctor.

Winner: Dr. Britt Baker
**3/4, 70% overall

---

The main PPV kicks off with a recap of some of the highlights from the last two years of Double or Nothing as AEW moves into year 3 of existence. We get all sorts of pyro and ballyhoo.

Meanwhile, the ladies from the 6-pack challenge advise me that there’s a problem with the showers in the women’s locker room. I mean, I have a show to run and they probably could have just gone to facilities, but this seems super important and something that requires my direct attention. So I pass the reigns over to Sophie and head on my way.


FTR (Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler) w/ Tully Blanchard vs. SCU (Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian)

SCU opened Double or Nothing two years ago and that’s no exception tonight. As SCU do their pre-match promo, FTR hop into the ring and jump them early, specifically targeting Kazarian who gets taken out at the knee as they remove the knee brace he’s wearing and start stomping away at it.

The ref offers SCU the chance to bail on the match but no chance they’re doing that, but Daniels has to pretty much go it alone at first. No easy task for any man, let alone trying to pull it off against a well oiled machine like FTR. But thankfully Daniels knows how to work in any situation and sell his ass off, he may not wrestle much any more but he’s aged like a fine wine.

Daniels gets some hope spots in even though he’s largely playing Ricky Morton. A hobbled Kazarian finally makes his way up to the apron just in time for the hot tag. Kazarian leaps into the ring over the top rope, and throws off his knee brace. Maybe it’s adrenaline but it seems his knee is looking fine right about now! FTR hit the bricks in shock. Kazarian dares them to come back in. Daniels eventually gets his bearings and stands side by side with his partner…..WAVE OF THE FUTURE ON DANIELS! WHAT?

FTR and Tully laugh their asses off at ringside as Kazarian pulls Daniels to the corner, tags himself back out of the match and FTR pop in to give the helpless Daniels a Big Rig of his own for the easy win.

The third member of SCU Scorpio Sky runs out and asks Frankie what the hell he is doing, but shortly after he’s blindsided by a chair shot from Shawn Spears. Spears lays multiple stiff chair shots into Sky and a few into Daniels for good measure. They Pillmanize Sky’s ankle with the chair as well. Spears, FTR, Tully, and Kazarian have a group hug. This is sickening! WHY FRANKIE WHY???

Winners: FTR
****1/2, 91% overall


----

Casino Battle Royale

Justin Roberts reminds everyone of the rules: the 21 men have drawn from a deck of cards. A suit will be chosen and the 5 men that drew that suit will start the match. Every 3 minutes, another suit is drawn and another group will enter the match. Whoever drew the Joker card will be the 21st and final man to enter the match. Elimination occurs when a wrestler is thrown over the top rope and both feet touch the floor. The last wrestler standing will receive an AEW World Championship match at All Out in August.

And with that, the deck is shuffled and the Diamonds are the first group. Rey Fenix makes the first entrance to a big pop, followed by Matt Sydal who gets a good hand as well. Angelico is in next as something of a wild card entrant with his partner Jack Evans now on the shelf. The Inner Circle theme hits and out come Jake Hager and Wardlow to round out the group, with the announcers of course mentioning there's an advantage to the stablemates being in the match at the same time.

The pair naturally work together as the match kicks off, as the two of them ward off the three speedsters in the ring with him. Fenix and Sydal are able to evade elimination but poor Angelico gets the short straw as the first man eliminated by the Inner Circle duo as they pair off against the smaller guys.

Three minutes comes and goes and now we've got the Hearts next. Eddie Kingston walks out first to heat but thinks better of getting into the ring straight away. Billy Gunn is next as an unexpected entrant, but apparently the 57-year old didn't get the memo that the Inner Circle don't like old fucks. They stop what they're doing and immediately just heave Billy out before the next guy in the group's music even hits. Luchasaurus rumbles his way in to a nice pop. Karl Anderson is out next to boos. And finally "The Bad Boy" Joey Janela is out with a trash can, he goes right for Kingston at ringside, apparently taking exception to his ongoing claims of being the toughest man in wrestling.

Kingston and Janela have a mini hardcore brawl in the corner of the ring as Inner Circle get their shots in wherever. Anderson manages to sneak an elimination of Sydal.

The Spades are the third group and the crowd gets on their feet immediately as the Dark Order theme hits and "Hangman" Adam Page and Colt Cabana enter the ring together. Kingston manages to finally dispose of Janela after having a mini hardcore brawl with him since he entered, but he has no time to gloat as Lance Archer charges in next to get him some of his rival. Shawn Spears is out next to boos, still brandishing his chair from earlier. He seems to be daring the next man to enter only to laugh it off. As it turns out, the final man in this interval was meant to be Scorpio Sky and the announcers explain he was forced to withdraw after the brutal beating he received from Spears in the last match.

Main highlight from this interval is Archer throwing around everyone that moves, especially Kingston. The Inner Circle team up to toss Luchasaurus out. Rey Fenix nearly eliminates Eddie Kingston but Butcher and Blade rush the ring to keep him in. Fenix hits a tope through the ropes onto them and it ends up being a 3 on 1 beatdown on him on the outside as the clock ticks down to the last group, the Clubs...

The Lucha Brothers music hits and OH SHIT - Penta El Cero Miedo is back from injury as a surprise entrant! Penta launches himself off the steps at the Family as he and Fenix brawl with the three on the outside. Jungle Boy enters and slaps hands with his eliminated partner Luchasaurus on the way in. "Big Money" Matt Hardy is out, also not coming alone as Private Party to accompany him as they strategize in the corner of the ringside area. Sammy Guevara cockily struts out next to get the Inner Circle at full strength, and Darby Allin doesn't even wait for his music to hit before skating up behind him and getting an early jump on him.

Seeing Sammy jumped, Hager and Wardlow leave the ring through the ropes to go beat down Darby. The Family and Lucha Brothers continue to throw down. Dark Order leave the ring to have another scrap with the Hardy Party. Inside the ring, Jungle Boy's stint only lasts a couple of minutes as Spears and Anderson form a temporary alliance to throw him out. The big guy Lance Archer then takes both heels out only for Eddie Kingston to sneak back into the ring and dump Archer out himself. Kingston eliminates the man who took him out of last year's Casino Battle Royale!

Kingston celebrates alone in the ring as if he's won, despite there still being three separate brawls going on with groups outside the ring, including his henchmen continuing to brawl with the Lucha Brothers. The toughest man in wrestling continues to celebrate as the countdown is on to the #21 entrant.....



The crowd loses their absolute shit as MINORU FUCKING SUZUKI makes his way out! We’ve heard the rumors that AEW was looking to work with New Japan Pro Wrestling, well the forbidden door sure seems like it’s been open.

Kingston looks beside himself as the self-proclaimed toughest man in wrestling now has one of the scariest motherfuckers in the business marching down to the ring. The crowd scream the “KAZE NI NARE” chorus to Suzuki’s theme as he steps in and stares a bullet in Kingston. The two have a stare down and the brawling around the ring stops as everyone is transfixed by what is happening in the ring.

Kingston punches Suzuki but the pain doesn’t register with him as he counters with an open hand slap across Eddie’s face followed by spinning him around and locking him right into a Rear Naked Choke as the crowd goes ballistic. Suzuki picks up Kingston’s dead weight and chucks him out of the match! Butcher and Blade hop onto the apron to avenge their friend but ultimately think better of it when Suzuki stares them down.

Matt Hardy forces Private Party into the ring despite them not being in the match and Suzuki just smacks them around like a couple of young boys, laughing like a sadistic bastard all the way. Matt himself tries to sneak up on Suzuki but only gets a snapmare followed by a Penalty Kick straight to the chest. The crowd is still in a frenzy, Suzuki picks Matt Hardy up...can he hit it…..GOTCH STYLE PILEDRIVER! And Matt is thrown out.

Anyway that was a major markout moment for the fans, but all good things must come to an end as all three Inner Circle members jump Suzuki. I mean hey, they hate old guys, but Suzuki is a lot scarier than most so it’s gotta be all hands on deck. Still, three against one Suzuki is out to huge heat.

The Lucha Bros, Dark Order, and Darby all realize their only hope of any of them winning is breaking down the Inner Circle, so we end up with a 5 on 3 situation. Sammy and Darby resume their fight while Hager and Wardlow end up in 2 on 1 situations. Lucha Bros take out Hager, Dark Order take out Wardlow. Sammy reverses Darby and sends him flying out, but Darby still has a score to settle so he pulls Sammy out under the ropes, positions him onto the apron and delivers a brutal Coffin Drop to him.

Tornado tag action in the ring now, Lucha Bros vs. Dark Order. Ends up lasting for several minutes with a lot of elimination tease spots. Eventually Penta shelves Colt. Hangman lifts out Fenix. Penta charges at Hangman but he ducks and pulls down the ropes, HANGMAN WINS!!!

But wait, Sammy was never eliminated, he sneaks in from behind and throws out Hangman EXCEPT HE DOESN’T! Sammy doesn’t realize Hangman held onto the apron. BUCKSHOT LARIAT! Sammy does a full flip on the sell job and Page throws him out. HANGMAN WINS FOR REAL NOW!!!

Crowd goes nuts as a jubilant Hangman celebrates with the finest booze money can buy, he’s going to All Out!

Winner: Hangman Adam Page
75% overall rating
Not a great overall rating since the overness was some of the participants was down......but I give this 6 stars, fuck you Scott Keith!

I only caught the tail end of that last match but it sounded pretty epic, I only just got back from attending to the shower situation. I mean it took quite a while to get things going but eventually I got it working but the ladies wanted me to stay and make sure it didn’t break down again so I had to kinda hang there for a while. I guess it was just the excessive steam but I’m tired. Like, really really tired like I just went through a marathon. Strange. In totally unrelated verbiage I think I definitely blew my creative load on that last write up so I might be a little more to the point the rest of the way.

Anyway the ladies strolled in with a bunch of snacks and booze as a token of gratitude so I suppose I can just chill and have an impromptu viewing party the rest of the way. Good timing too as we’re heading to our Women’s Championship match!


AEW Women’s World Championship
Nyla Rose w/ Vickie Guerrero vs. Awesome Kong (C)

What is the female equivalent of a hoss fight? Does such a thing exist? Because that’s totally what this is as these two just beat the piss out of each other in a really sweet brawl. Relatively even bout throughout with Kong having what appeared to be her roughest challenge to date, she has yet to face anyone in AEW that can muscle out of her offense quite like the impressive Nyla Rose.

Several near falls in both directions and the referee takes an accidental corner bump. Vickie grabs the title and climbs the apron, screaming at Rose to use the belt to hit Kong. Vickie tosses the belt into the ring and Kong intercepts it. Rather than hit Rose with it, she gets her up for a Soul Collector onto the title as Kong retains.


After the match, Kong actually helps Rose up and they seem to nod in acknowledgment of the war they had. As Nyla leaves the ring, Vickie berates her and slaps her for losing. This makes Nyla snap, she grabs Vickie by the hair, walks her over to the announcers and HOLY SHIT Vickie takes a powerbomb through the announce table! Now that’s a write-off, excuse me indeed.

Meanwhile Kong continues to celebrate as the announcers wonder who could possibly stop Kong. Almost on queue, the lights go out and when they are back on, we see somebody on the ramp…..



BAH GAWD KANA HAS ARRIVED IN AEW!!!!

Winner and STILL AEW Women's World Champion: Awesome Kong
***1/4, 78% overall

---

Three matches in, three surprises. Did I just debut two Japanese wrestlers in consecutive segments? You betcha! The ladies especially popped for Kana, and they’re super appreciative that I’m investing more financial resources into building a must-see women’s division.

TNT Championship
“Freshly Squeezed” Orange Cassidy w/ Best Friends vs. “The Machine” Brian Cage (C) w/ Team Taz

Physically these two could not look more different. OC looks like a stringbean wearing sunglasses and Brian Cage looks like he’s done enough steroids to make Scott Steiner blush. And yet the beauty of wrestling is that they found a way to make it work well enough. OC tried to play mind games at the start by appearing to take Cage lightly only to take him off guard with a bunch of flash pins that nearly worked. Cage tried to outmuscle him and OC used his speed advantage to evade some of the offense.

Outside the ring the Best Friends and Team Taz tried to keep each other at bay and avoiding interference anytime one of the participants ended up outside the ring, but as is usually the case they did end up brawling outside eventually. As the ref was distracted by this, Cage grabs both the TNT and FTW titles and clangs them together on OC’s skull. Drill Claw and that’s all she wrote, The Machine retains.

Winner and STILL TNT Champion: "The Machine" Brian Cage
***, 83% overall

---

Jon Moxley vs. Miro

These two have been wanting to tear at each other for weeks and now they finally get their chance. Both men started like a house of file before the battle turned surprisingly more technical as both men have been known to use choke holds, but neither could get it fully locked in on one another.

Although this wasn’t a No DQ match, the bad blood between these two caused referee Bryce Remsburg to use his own discretion to basically allow them to do anything short of felonious assault, and that includes not making a 10 count during prolonged periods brawling on the floor and even among the fans.

Eventually the melee made its way to the rampway, Miro locking in Game Over on Mox and Mox slamming his fist to the ground in pain, but it can’t count as a tap up on the ramp. Mox summons some reserve energy sources and surprisingly muscles Miro up on his back...he leaps back and the two go crashing through the stage! Shades of Taz and Bam Bam Bigelow in ECW. The “holy shit” chants get up in full force as Mox is able to pull himself from the wreckage. Remsburg has seen enough and rules the match in favor of Mox by way of knock out.

Winner: Jon Moxley
****1/4, 89% overall

---

AEW World Tag Team Championship
Santana and Ortiz vs. The Young Bucks (Matt and Nick Jackson) (C)

Announcers bring up the history between these two teams – the Bucks successfully defended their titles against them a few months ago however Santana and Ortiz hold a PPV victory over the Bucks from Full Gear in November 2019.

I’m not really sure what to even say about this match because I’ve booked these two teams in this game before and, well, just like in real life it’s always quality. These two teams gel beautifully and the Bucks seem to work well against anyone they face ever.

In a night full of surprises, we see another one here as Nick Jackson is sent flying out of the ring, leaving Matt to fall prey to the Street Sweeper. 3 seconds later and we have NEW tag team champions! The surprise isn’t that Santana and Ortiz won…..but they won it clean? The Inner Circle won something clean????

The Bucks seem taken aback by all of this, but are willing to acknowledge the better men on this night. They extend their hands to the new champs but the heels blow them off.

Winners and NEW AEW Tag Team Champions: Santana and Ortiz
****1/2, 94% overall

---

This show has ruled so much ass so far, and so has the viewing party. As the ladies feed me shrimp the size of car batteries down my throat, we all settle in for the next match.


Match for the Right to the Rhodes Name
Maxwell Jacob Friedman w/ Wardlow vs. Cody Rhodes w/ Dustin Rhodes

Wardlow despite having a long run in the Casino Battle Royale is back out there as MJF’s right hand man. Though Dustin was forced into retirement from the ring three days ago, Cody wanted his brother by his side one last time to even the score.

I imagine the ring work for this one to be very old school NWAish of nature, which is fitting given that the match is for the Rhodes name. MJF just being an insufferable prick the whole time, being the Flair to Cody’s Dusty. Cody avoids defeat a few times, and a few hopes spots in there but MJF always manages to wrangle his way to the ropes and at one point Wardlow himself gets his foot under the ropes.

Naturally, this gives rise to the expected fun-but-overbooked schmozz on the outside of the ring. Dustin starts taking it to Wardlow and from there we have a heaping helping of interference spot chaos outside the ring. Sammy Guevara and Jake Hager are out to get on Dustin but Darby Allin skates his way out, wanting to get himself even more of Sammy after they fought in the Battle Royale earlier.

Darby and Sammy brawl backstage, as do Hager and Dustin. Wardlow gets back to his feet only for STING to emerge from the crowd! STING??? WHAT? MJF and Wardlow can’t believe it. Sting points his bat at Wardlow…..only to then drop it and hit Wardlow with….a spinning elbow? The crowd instantly pops at that because that wasn’t any spinning elbow, that was the Judas Effect! Sting pulls off the mask and it’s CHRIS JERICHO!!!

MJF looks like he’s seen a ghost….and while he has his eye off the ball, Cody grabs him from behind and gets him into position. Cross Rhodes! Cody wins! Cody avenges his family and the legends that MJF has tormented, and perhaps the bigger story is Chris Jericho is back and ready to make his former faction pay for putting him on the shelf.

Winner: Cody Rhodes
****1/4, 94% overall

---

30-Minute Iron Man Match for the AEW World Championship
“The Bastard” PAC vs. “The Cleaner” Kenny Omega (C) w/ Don Callis

Again even though it’s the main event I’m not really sure what else I can say about these two, they pulled out a 5 star match a month into their feud in a straight up singles match, I can only imagine what it’s gonna be like 3 months later in their blowoff match.

Basically these two gel perfectly and everybody knows it. Even though Kenny and Callis try to cheat at times, they have to be super careful with it because a DQ could absolutely spell doom for the champion. This becomes true as we chug right on past the 20 minute mark with no falls to be found.

Poisonrana attempt on Kenny is blocked. Kenny gets to his feet, V-Trigger to the back of PAC’s head. Picks him up for the One Winged Angel and hits it. 1...2...3! Kenny is up 1-0 with about 5 minutes to go.

Kenny has 5 minutes to run out the clock but there’s not a lot he can do. Although it is a 30 minute match, Kurt Angle made it very clear from the onset that a tie will mean sudden death. So Kenny can’t risk DQ or simply running around outside the ring getting counted out. He has to try to evade PAC in the ring and PAC is now tapping into energy reserves he didn’t know he had.

3 minutes left, PAC hits multiple release Germans on Kenny. Sets him up in the corner, goes up top. BLACK ARROW! 1….2….Kenny barely, and I mean barely gets his foot on the rope, pure muscle memory at this point.

Only about a minute left, PAC drags Kenny to the center of the ring and locks in the Brutalizer. Kenny screams in agony. Callis is screaming at him to not tap. Kenny teases tapping but his hand eventually goes limp. He’s passed out from the pain! Aubrey Edwards checks his arm to make sure it’ll fall. 1...2...DING DING DING DING! The time has elapsed! Kenny made it!

Kenny may not look like a winner right now, but rest assured he has won! Besides, Don Callis already paid for the celebration so here comes explosions with balloons and confetti falling down in the ring on Kenny’s dead corpse, all as PAC sits on in stunned disbelief that came so close yet so far from winning the big one.

Winner and STILL AEW World Champion: "The Cleaner" Kenny Omega
****1/4, 92% overall

89% overall show rating

---

Hell of a show. The fans loved it, Scott Keith loved it, my viewing party loved it. And after the show, it was announced that I have indeed moved into global status. I prefer to be humble about it but the ladies felt otherwise as they conspired to hoist me triumphantly upon their shoulders and parade me through the halls of the MGM Casino. Perhaps a little excessive but hey who am I to judge how they wish to show appreciation?

Moving on up.

Where's my tremendous shot of Ivelisse's glorious posterior? :cry:


Well, the doctor winning can kind of make up for the lack of Ivelisse's wonderous gluteus maximus. Also, did they do an update or something to the game where you can do a match like this?

You can't leave something of that magnitude to some schlub who works by the hour. You send in a professional...and various pieces of video recording equipment....

I figured as much that was going to happen. Kazarian vs. Daniels ought to be a hell of a swan song for The Fallen Angel. Does he still use that name?

This is actually a pretty neat idea. It's sort of a weird Royal Rumble-War Games hybrid. I was wondering how you'd get around the limit of the game not actually being able to do 21 participants but Scorpio Sky running afoul of misfortune was tops. I don't know if I'd be able to script out a Royal Rumble because I'm not Pat Patterson. I feel like I should know who Suzuki is but my memory isn't what it used to be. Page should have wheeled out cases of booze and handed them out to the crowd. Yeah, parents might complain about kids potentially getting their hands on some but what the fuck are they doing at a PPV late at night anyway?

See, this is why you need the video equipment. Should something have failed again during their hot, steamy, naked, wet, cleansing shower session, you'd have something to check on, over and over and over, to find the problem. THOROUGHNESS ISN'T SOMETHING TO TAKE LIGHTLY!

Well the females in a lot of species are called cows but somehow I doubt that would go over too well in regards to this match. That was actually a pretty OK finish. Like when Goldberg had the opportunity to use the sledgehammer on Triple H but what was like, "LOL, that's for pussies".

My head canon says that Vickie shit her pants on impact.

OK, I recognize her as Asuka back in NXT. Did she get shitcanned in real life, too?

Details on how appreciative they were and the levels of exhaustion afterwards are strictly need-to-know.

Con-belt-to??? :wtf:

I mean the rules clearly say 'tap out', not 'pound the surface'.

Was wondering when those tag titles would be switched. I'd imagine some sort of multi-team thing would be in the works judging from what went down earlier. Indeed, this show does seem to be pleasing the game.


Quite the payoff but I'd like to believe that if I were watching this live, Jericho's absurd dad bod would immediately give it away that it wasn't Sting. Like, Barry Windham trying to pose as Sting levels of ridiculous.

With a streak like the one you've been on it was bound to happen that you'd move up to global level. I also had a similar finish in mind when I did Jenna/Faith in their first Iron Woman match. The ladies no doubt want to do some more demonstrating of their appreciation. :yes:

She's too busy in rehab, undoubtedly recovering from her addiction to butt injections.

Haha nah, I just booked it as a 2 vs. 2 vs. 2 tag. I've done Elimination Chambers etc in a similar way. One time I even did a title change in the chamber by booking 2 vs. 2 vs. 2 and then the winning "team" I booked immediately after in a 1 vs. 1 cage match. I make the most of what I can with what the game gives me.

Same thing with doing 2 vs. 2 vs. 2 (vs. 2) tag ladder matches and pretending it's Money in the Bank.

Shit if I'm gonna be on camera I might need a name change. Let's see if the game will let me change my name to Max Deepwood.

Yeah he still uses that name. He's doing a retirement tease angle in real life as well. He and Kazarian decided this year that they would stop teaming as soon as they lost their next match. So they went on a months long winning streak before the newly heel Young Bucks cheated to beat them and forced the longtime partners to split. Daniels has since moved offscreen teasing retirement while Kazarian vows revenge.

Yeah I mean if push came to shove I'd just leave a schmuck like Billy out of the match in-game and imagine him still entering/being instantly jobbed out in a comedy spot but as it is this worked for the angle I was running.

There was a spell where I fantasy booked the Rumble every single year when the season rolled around. It's fun to put the match together...but alas, any passion I had for WWE is long dead.

Longtime terrifying badass in Japan. Has worked for most of the major promotions over there, including running his own shoot fighting promotion. As a legendary figure in Japan him turning up as part of the AEW/NJPW working agreement would be a cool novelty. But the main thing is I wanted to get him in here for a few dates before he retires, which I assume the game will make him do as he's about to turn 53. His age hasn't slowed him down and he has a brawl rating of 85 to give you a perspective of where he is on the scale of Japanese strong style.

:lol: the last thing I need is to get cancelled here, if only there were another promotion tone deaf enough to do such a thing

Now that's taking Holy Shit to new levels. I mean in fairness to Vickie, grating as she may be she realizes that heel authority figures and managers only work if they're willing to be humiliated when the time calls for it. That might be just a tad further than she'd be willing to go though :lol:

I love how a few shows ago I mentioned having three hot women massaging me, fanning me, and feeding me grapes and now a few weeks later I'm up to six women. What more could they do for me? Chop chop dig dig chop chop dig dig.

I was imagining it as being clanged together like cymbals which I don't think I've seen before, not even sure that could be done safely since those belts are pretty heavy but fuck it.

Santana and Ortiz are very much who I'd like to see be the ones to dethrone the Bucks in real life, although at this point their face/heel alignments have been reversed. If they can hold off a couple more months they have their first NYC show in September and I think the hometown boys Santana and Ortiz winning the straps there would be awesome.

That sad moment when a 50 year old Jericho has a worse dad bod than 62 year old Sting.

They treated me like a king for sure. That said nearly all women's wrestlers are dating other wrestlers and two of them are married to other wrestlers in my promotion. Here's hoping I avoid getting my ass kicked :lol:

Ugh, I have a pretty decent card in mind for Unforgiven but it's just a matter of having the time to be able to sit and go full blast. Luckily I'll be on vacation starting next week so who knows? I might be able to finish the year barring any distractions.

God damn it, I fucked myself when signing some new (well, not really new, I had them on the roster before but I was re-signing them because of an idea I had for the tag titles) guys and I put them on an open contract for about $260,000 per appearance! Well, I foresee this storyline lasting only a month or so. :|

Hot damn, that is quite the pay day :lol: book me whenever you want for that kind of money

Oh, you'd like that wouldn't you? :o

Raw - September 3, 2040

We open with a, um, rather unfamiliar face. This is a rather tall and beefy gentlemen walking down to the ring with no music. But wait; HE'S CARRYING THE MONEY IN THE BANK BRIEFCASE!!! That's Brandon Reigns's briefcase that got tossed into the crowd by Seth Von Kamp! Who is this guy and why does he have it? He enters the ring and gets a mic and proceeds to introduce himself.

"Apologies all around! I'm sorry for holding up the show in this manner but you all have to understand something; this has been a dream of mine for the longest time! I'VE MADE IT TO THE WWE! Forgive me, I'm getting ahead of myself. You can call me 'Big Thunder' Eddy Clash and I am here to make my mark on the industry. What I'm holding in my hand is my ticket into the company. I'm holding the Money in the Bank briefcase which grants its possessor a shot at the WWE Unified World Title whenever they want! You might be asking yourself how I got my grubby little paws on such a prize. Well, I was in the crowd at SmackDown! last week, enjoying the show, when Seth Von Kamp tossed the briefcase into the audience! I was lucky enough to be able to catch it and leave the show with it. You see, I took this as a sign. A sign to take that huge step into the spotlight and follow my dreams. I will be cashing in this contract and I will become the NEW Unified World Champion!"

Let's pump the brakes on all of this as Brandon Reigns decides to make himself known. He enters the ring to confront this apparent newcomer and makes his demands known. "Listen, I don't know who you are. I don't care who you are. Bottom line is I am the Money in the Bank winner. That's MY briefcase you're holding. That's MY title shot you're asking for. Alright? I don't have the time nor the patience for this nonsense. I'm already nursing a headache 10 miles wide having to watch Seth Von Kamp parade around with the Intercontinental Title and it only got worse when I had to watch him throw my briefcase to an idiot like you!"

"Woah, woah, let's just all calm down here. Look, possession is 9/10ths of the law, you know? The way I see it, I cash in this bad boy, I beat Noah Carmichael or whoever, and then I'm on top of the world! Then I can give you a title shot! It's win-win all around!"

"Look, Eddy, is it? You are being asked, relatively nicely if I do say so myself, by a 4-time Intercontinental Champion, a man who's retired some of the top names in this business, to do the right thing and return my property. This isn't a game. This isn't play pretend. Hand over the case...NOW."

"I don't know, man. If you were that attached to it, maybe you wouldn't have let Seth take it from you in the first place. I mean, the same could be said about the Intercontinental Championship!"

"Hey, hey! I can get back the Intercontinental Title from that poser ANY TIME I WANT. I can take that briefcase from you any time that I want, too! I just figured I tried playing things nice with a delusional moron like you! But if you're going to keep this charade up, I'll let you know first hand what you'll be getting into should you ever make it into the WWE!"

With that, Reigns tries to assault Clash but the newbie has a clear size advantage and overpowers Reigns. Clash tosses Reigns around a bit and clotheslines the former Intercontinental Champion over the top rope. Clash takes his leave while Reigns is dazed on the outside AND TAKES THE BRIEFCASE WITH HIM! Reigns continues to be the man without a belt or a contract.

Backstage Paul Andrews is walking down the hallway when he bumps into one half of the Unified Tag Team Champions, Rick Hilton. Hilton demands that Andrews watch where he's going. Hilton questions what Andrews is even doing here. Practically all of his clients have been run out of town. Maybe Andrews should take it as a sign that his management career isn't up to snuff unlike some other managers in the company right now. Take Vivian Merrick for instance. Not only is she one fine woman in the physical sense, but also in the intellectual sense. She knows what makes a great team to be the champions. Paul Andrews counters that he was actually just leaving Lisa Benton's office talking about a couple of prospects that Andrews has had his eye on for a while and that he'd like to bring in. Andrews also knows what makes a great team capable of becoming champions.

First Match: WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Future Foundation vs. Caleb Greene and Stanley Coleman
Rick Hilton looks like he's trying to shake off what he was told by Paul Andrews in the last segment. There are certainly a lot of teams gunning for the Future Foundation. This is mainly a showcase for the champions to demonstrate their dominance in the division. Vivian Merrick once again pulls her weight by distracting Coleman and Julian takes advantage by nailing the Black Sheep to score the pin. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Backstage we're joined by Martyn LaSalle and the returning Jordan Demiras. Demiras notes that this is the first time we're getting to hear from him since coming back but he asks for forgiveness because quite frankly he hasn't really been in a talkative mood as of late. See, unlike Michael Hotbody and that dysfunctional group of clowns that he calls his back-up, Demiras and LaSalle aren't about talk. They're not about looking for any little path possible to get out of a fight. Well, the fight is coming whether Hotbody and his cronies like it or not. You think something like assault with a cage door is going to be forgotten? Hotbody didn't just rob Demiras of the Cruiserweight Title or his pride. He robbed his livelihood. LaSalle adds his two cents by warning Galino & Farnes to stay out of the way.

To the ring we go as Eclypse and the WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey want to speak their minds. Naomi wants to let the Lonely Girls know that the honeymoon is over. They had their feelgood moment and they got the publicity and the pomp and circumstance and all of that vomit-inducing egostroking. It's back to the real world time for those two dolls! Eclypse talks about what the Lonely Girls did at SummerSlam was admirable but it was just one night. Eclypse is willing to swallow her pride and team with Naomi one more time to get one more crack at the belts IF the champions aren't scared. Naomi seems taken back by Eclypse's comment and asks what Eclypse means by 'swallowing her pride'? Eclypse reminds Naomi about the arrangement they had when Naomi approached her with the idea of going for the Women's Tag Team Titles. All Naomi had to do was make sure Eclypse didn't regret it; and quite frankly, Naomi dropped the ball at SummerSlam. Naomi gets even more flustered and upset and fires back. "Oh, so I'M the weak link in this little 'arrangement'? Remember this, Eclypse: I'm still the God damn Women's Champion. I am NEVER the weak link!"

Cue the Lonely Girls interrupting this tense moment. The Women's Tag Team Champions seem amused at what they're witnessing. Jenna has a mic and addresses Naomi. "Why, yes, Naomi; you are STILL the Women's Champion. Even though you LOST when I pinned you at SummerSlam and we became the champions, you STILL kept your belt. Kind of like 2 weeks ago when you also LOST when I faced you for the Women's Title and yet you STILL kept your belt. That's a little weird, huh, Faith?"

"Kind of unfair, too."

"Yeah, definitely unfair. So here's what we were thinking. The two of you have been looking for another go at us for these championships, right? Well, we're nothing if not fighting champions. So we'll grant you a title shot under one condition. Naomi, you first have to give me another shot at your Women's Title, this Thursday on Superstars. And if you can win, you'll get your rematch. If you lose, though, you don't get anything! What do you say?"

Naomi looks offended at this request. "Give YOU a shot at MY title??? Why would I do that? You don't deser...."

"You got a deal!" Eclypse interrupts.

"Great!" Jenna exclaims. "See you all Thursday!" The segment ends as the champions take their leave and Naomi and Eclypse exchange death stares.

Second Match: The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody and Zed Jones vs. The Play Pals
Hotbody has words for Gavin Jones. Gavin Jones thinks he's so special because he happened to get lucky and eliminate Hotbody from that tag team battle royal a while back! Well the truth is Hotbody just slipped and lost his grip on the top rope! It can get really sweaty in this ring sometimes, ESPECIALLY when it's dripping with the awesome sex appeal of Michael Hotbody and Luscious! And that's really what everyone needs to take away from all of the drama: the truth! Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle don't want to face the truth so they'll be forced to face it one way or another! Hotbody will once again demonstrate tonight how he is one of the last bastions of integrity in the WWE. So we get a kick ass match from these guys, mainly due to the Play Pals' standing. Oh, and also because their feud with The Royal Effect keeps on trucking as King Kavovit is joined by the returning Moses McKay and they decide to cost the Play Pals the match. Gavin gets murdered with chairshots and Michael Hotbody demonstrates integrity by alerting the referee...that he's got a pin attempt on Gavin. 1-2-3, Hotbody and Zed pick up the win thanks to the feud NEEDING TO CONTINUE! The Play Pals get destroyed afterwards. *****, 95% overall.

Third Match: Clubber Harris vs. Ronnie Costello
I really need to do more with Harris. I don't want to waste his face turn. So I'll give him a win here. Costello gets crushed by the Club Pain and Harris gets the duke. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Backstage Lisa Benton is joined by Sophie Waters in her office. Sophie asks Lisa about how the last few months have been, dealing with Michael Hotbody and all of his stupidity. Lisa admits that it's taken it's toll but she's managing. Sophie wonders why Lisa didn't come to her to solve this problem. Sophie is managing the hottest cruiserweight in the division right now, Shawn Dangerson! Shawn could have handled that moron a long time ago. Lisa appreciates that but Sophie is as good a friend as Riott is. Lisa can't be seen making decisions that would appear to be playing favorites. Sophie counters that Shawn has been on a roll. Even with the two of them being friends, no sane person can look at Shawn's record and say he hasn't earned an opportunity. Lisa still isn't sure but she will consider Shawn for an idea that she has that will determine a number one contender for the Cruiserweight Title. Sophie seems cool with that and takes her leave.

Fourth Match: The Pacific Connection vs. The Glitz Girls
Yeah, jockey for that position, ladies....Erm, I mean, this is some solid shit we got going here in the women's tag division. The heels aren't quite in the same league as the Glitz Girls so Mika suffers a Jam Session from Lzzy and the faces pick up the win. ****1/4, 85% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Ozzy Mandias. He's out here because with all of the talks about who is going to be next to get a shot at Michael Hotbody's Cruiserweight Title, he doesn't want to be overlooked. This has been the year of the rookie as tons of people in their first year here have made huge impacts and Ozzy wants to be able to say the same. All well and good but another rookie has other ideas as the returning Ziggy Styles comes into the ring behind Ozzy and lays him out. Styles isn't done and hits the Thing-ama-Zig! Ziggy demands that we all get Ziggy with it!

MAIN EVENT: Salvatore Scabbia and The Academy vs. Ryan Pattillo and The Dillingers
Brooke is with her boys and she informs us that Noah Carmichael still hasn't given Lisa Benton the all clear. Salvatore Scabbia is getting impatient and he's not going to wait forever. Carmichael needs to hurry up and step into the ring or just forfeit the title to Scabbia! It's hard to argue with Brooke as Scabbia leads his team with a dominating outing. The faces pull out a last ditch comeback and it's BONZO GONZO but Brooke has too much riding on this. Scabbia is alone with Ben Dillinger and Brooke works her magic allowing Scabbia to lock in the Omerta for the submission win. Scabbia motions to the camera that he wants the belts! ****1/2, 90% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%

The Clash debut was brilliant. Such a unique way to debut a new face and have them "rocket strapped" for lack of a better term by putting them straight into an angle with a marquee player in the company.

Intrigued by who Andrews has up his sleeve to bring in, whether they be new NXT talent or a new team formed from the current roster.

I love Naomi and Eclypse's dysfunction. Eclypse wants another tag title shot, Naomi wants nothing to do with defending her own title. Lots of good shit coming out of that division.

And of course, :lol: Hotbody adding the all important Conga award from 9 years ago into his title. Your ring announcers will be demanding a wage increase just from having to say his name every week.

Superstars - September 6, 2040

We open with Lisa Benton talking about what's going to go down next week on Superstars. She declares that it will be a special edition of the show as it will mainly focus on one element: naming a contender for the WWE Cruiserweight Championship. There will be a multi-man gauntlet match featuring the top cruiserweight competitors and the last man standing will be named the number one contender. There are already a few names that are a lock to be involved and she will be eyeing other potential competitors in the next few days. As far as tonight goes, four of those competitors will square off in a tag team match: Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle vs. Jason Sorola and Miles Shawcross!

Backstage, we catch up with the Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp. He's asked if he should bear any sort of responsibility for what went down on Raw between Brandon Reigns and Eddy Clash. Seth proudly claims responsibility because it's about time someone started making Brandon Reigns's life miserable. Seth admits to getting small bits of satisfaction knowing that Reigns is losing his mind every day that passes knowing that the Intercontinental Championship is no longer his. And now that Seth is taking the blame, Brandon is more than welcome to try and do something about it.

First Match: Jesse Capalbo, Isaac Wolff, and El Silencio vs. Jerome McDougal and the Millennium Rebels
We're told that Jerome McDougal is one of the names being circulated as possibly being involved in next week's gauntlet. There's a pool of cruiserweights here so anyone of them could be a possible participant. As you'd expect this is a major showcase for the cruiserweights as to sell next week's show. Aaron Ramsey decides to interject on the heels' behalf as he runs distraction for the ref and that allows McDougal to land that cruiserweight staple, a low blow to Wolff's netherregions followed by one of those cool lucha style cradles for the pin. ****1/2, 88% overall.

Outside the arena we see Eddy Clash trying to make his way inside...and he still has the briefcase! Security eventually greets him as he declares that he just wants to cash in the contract because Noah Carmichael is supposed to be here tonight. We can't remain here forever though so we head back to the ring as Clash continues his protest....

Second Match: Bonnie Beckham vs. Missy Brantley
Nathan Quinn is with Bonnie and he declares that he agrees with the sentiments expressed by Naomi Bailey on Raw. The honeymoon period for Faith Connors and Jenna Kyle is over. Neither Leah nor Bonnie Beckham have forgotten about those two poster girls. Now he may not know how tonight will play out in regards to the Women's title match, but his clients are looking ahead and will be involved in the hunt for those tag team titles one way or another. All that aside, this is mainly geared towards the benefit of Bonnie as I'd like to rebuild her into a solid hand for the sake of the women's tag division. She's got some great stats and I think she could flourish in that environment. Nathan provides some extra flourishing assistance by tripping up Brantley and Bonnie nails the Bluebonnet to score the pin. ****1/2, 93% overall.

It's tag team angle time as we're joined by the Royal Effect in the ring. Moses McKay is happy to be back in action. He rips into those two geeks, the Play Pals, for not being men and resorting to cheap tactics like injuring their opponents! Neither McKay nor Kavovit are keen on degrading themselves by continuing to bother with the likes of Jones and Haywood so everyone should consider the beating they got on Raw to be their comeuppance and that's that! The Royal Effect have better things to do with their time and it doesn't involve those cowardly children.

Cue the music of the Play Pals and they make their way out to the stage. Michael Haywood points out the fact that McKay called them geeks, which means that the Play Pals really don't have much to do with their time if that's the case so why not use that time to kick the Royal Effect's ass? Kavovit warns the Play Pals to know their limits because it's only going to get worse if they want to go down this path. The Royal Effect were born out of necessity because the tag team division needs them. It's moved past the Play Pals and that's not the fault of either Kavovit or McKay. However, whatever happens to the Play Pals if they choose to poke the bear will absolutely be the Royal Effect's fault.

Gavin Jones looks thoughtful as he lets Kavovit's words sink in. He turns to Haywood and declares that he's never poked a bear before. Haywood says that you only live once. With that, the Play Pals drop their mics and rush the ring to brawl with the Royal Effect. It's a wild affair that spreads around the ring where unfortunately the Royal Effect use chairs to get the upper hand and proceed to once again leave the Play Pals laying.

Backstage, Nathan Quinn is leaving the dressing room of his clients and he bumps into Paul Andrews. Nathan Quinn is actually glad to run into Andrews as he wants to rub his much more successful venture into managing in Andrews' face. Paul was never in the same league as Nathan when they were competitors and now he's being outshined in this phase of his career. Andrews points out the same thing as he did to Rick Hilton on Raw; he's got something good cooking and it's going to be the talk of the town. Quinn is looking forward to it. Actually he's looking forward to how Paul is going to screw it up. In fact, tomorrow night, Lonny Richards is scheduled to make his return. Why doesn't Paul get that sole client of his, Mathias, prepped for SmackDown! and everyone can see for themselves that Quinn is leading the charge into the future with his clients. Andrews agrees but warns that it'll just be the beginning.

Third Match: Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle vs. Jason Sorola and Miles Shawcross
So these guys are basically confirmed for the gauntlet and this is mainly a showcase for all of them. A really good showcase judging by the ratings. Of course, Galino & Farnes just have to be douches about things and they run in to get a beat down on the faces for the DQ. They declare that on behalf of their client, Michael Hotbody, SERIOUS INQUIRIES were made into the alliance between LaSalle and Demiras and they didn't like what they discovered. The firm of Galino & Farnes will always do what's in the best interest of fairness and the law and Demiras and LaSalle should never forget that! *****, 95% overall.

Fourth Match: WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp vs. Randy Ellis
Ellis is without Brooke curiously enough. This is some good shit here as I forsee Seth being an excellent Intercontinental Champion for a good while. Brandon Reigns tries his hand at getting him some of Seth just as he was invited but Eddy Clash is on the stage! How'd he manage to get in? Security is still trying to pull him back and the sight of Clash with the Money in the Bank briefcase is enough to distract Reigns. Seth pushes Ellis into Reigns, knocking him off the apron and Seth finishes with the Collapse of Society for the win. Eddy Clash is finally taken to the back and Reigns debates going after him or staying behind to get him some of Seth. He ultimately decides to take off leaving Seth triumphant. *****, 95% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as we're joined by the WWE Unified World Champion Noah Carmichael. He's still looking and feeling busted up but he's confident that he'll be ready to go by Unforgiven. He HAS to be ready to go by Unforgiven for the sake of his own pride. What Salvatore Scabbia did at SummerSlam was bold but it was a slap in the face. With that one moment Scabbia dares to place himself on par with the likes of all of the other big names that Carmichael has overcome. That's quite the boast considering the condition Carmichael left the last guy he faced. Brooke, for the sake of her man, had better understand where she's leading Scabbia. There are only so many times you can say "almost" before the reality becomes "never".

Cue Brooke and she looks like she's in a mood. She commends Carmichael for actually showing up but it's meaningless if he's not going to give Scabbia what he wants and what he's entitled to. She accuses Carmichael of milking his condition for sympathy and for a way out of facing Scabbia. It ultimately doesn't matter because there's nothing that's going to deter Scabbia and the part that everyone should worry about is that Scabbia doesn't need a fancy schmancy cage to obliterate Carmichael. Scabbia just needs the will and for Carmichael to show up to the dance. The clock is ticking, Carmichael, and Scabbia can only be held back for so long.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Women's Title
Naomi Bailey (c) vs. Jenna Kyle
This was set up on Raw. Naomi needs the win here if she and Eclypse are going to get their rematch against the Lonely Girls. This is almost beat-for-beat the kind of match they had a few weeks back as Jenna plays underdog to the powerhouse of Naomi. Things come to a head when each woman's partners show up at ringside to keep things on the up and up. Things head to the outside and all four women converge on each other. Eclypse looks like she's going to give some punishment on a fallen Jenna but Faith grabs her attention. Naomi grabs Eclypse's shoulder and Eclypse must think that it's Jenna as she immediately turns around to hit a right hand and hits Naomi knocking the champion down. The ref calls for the DQ as Naomi gets the win and retains but she looks shocked at what Eclypse did. Eclypse is also confused as Faith gets Jenna out of there. It looks like the rematch is on! *****, 97% overall.

Overall show rating: 90%

SmackDown! - September 7, 2040

We open with the rather bitter former Intercontinental Champion, the Money in the Bank winner Brandon Reigns. He's really not in the mood for anymore nonsense. Just last week he had to watch that lucky asshat, Seth Von Kamp, toss the Money in the Bank briefcase into the crowd. And then it only got worse! Instead of getting picked up by an ordinary peon like any of the people here, it gets stolen by some whackjob who thinks it belongs to him and that it's his way into the WWE! So on one hand, there's an irritating little punk pretending to be the Intercontinental Champion and on the other hand, there's a delusional irritating little punk pretending to be the Money in the Bank winner. Brandon Reigns is surrounded by stupidity on all sides and he's sick of it! He DEMANDS that Lisa Benton get off her ass and get back his property because all of this nonsense is getting out of hand!

This looks like a job for the 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He saunters down to the ring with a few sweet conga moves and joins Brandon Reigns.

"Look, Brandon, I feel you, man. I mean, I REALLY feel your pain. Things can be so unfair at times and it just feels more often than not that the world is constantly working against you, especially when you're filled with so much talent and good will that you want to share with everyone. I've been there! When I was younger, I was a conga prodigy! And let me tell you, down in Fulton Country there are two things that we take VERY SERIOUSLY! Peaches and conga line dancing! Grandma Hotbody was there with me from the beginning, bestowing upon me her decades of knowledge and smoothing out the rough edges. I was the best but I had my share of doubters and haters but my success in that area carried over to the success I'm enjoying now! And you, Brandon Reigns, can't let this window of darkness mess everything up for you!"

"Dear God, I want to shoot myself...."

"Hey, hey, come on now. There's no need to be so melodramatic. I've got other avenues to help you out. Look, we all hear you making your pleas to the boss, but I can guarantee you that the boss is the only one not listening. She's not going to do anything! If you want results, let me tell you, I have never been happier than with the services I've received from my expert legal team, Galino & Farnes! Yes, for the right price and the right case, you Brandon Reigns, can have the results you crave. No, scratch that! The results YOU DESERVE! Just like Grandma Hotbody was there for me, I'm paying it forward with this generous offer. We're a pair of winners, Brandon, and it's only right that winners look out for each other!"

This looks like a job for Ozzy Mandias and the rookie makes his way out to the stage. Ozzy poses the question of who will be looking out for Hotbody should Ozzy be the one to win next week's cruiserweight gauntlet on Superstars. Hotbody can only hide behind his wall of goons for so long and it's high time that someone takes that Cruiserweight Title. Brandon Reigns gets annoyed at this and demands that Ozzy take this matter someplace else. Reigns adds that Ozzy should pick his battles more carefully, otherwise he might end up with a dry spell in his career just like Seth Von Kamp.

This looks like a job for the Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp and he joins Ozzy on the stage. Seth points out that dry spells can only last so long before you run into the right opponent. An opponent who is overconfident and looks down on others and takes things for granted. But what does Seth know? He only became the Intercontinental Champion at SummerSlam and upset the precious plans of Brandon Reigns. But, hey, seeing as there are four guys here with nothing better to do, how about a tag team match later tonight? Hotbody looks like he wants to object but Reigns accepts on his behalf in a rage. Looks like we've got our main event!

First Match: Mathias vs. Lonny Richards
Paul Andrews and Nathan Quinn are with their respective clients here. Paul Andrews wants to let the people know that staying tuned into what he's bringing on board will be worth the wait. There are a couple of i's and t's that need dotting and crossing but Andrews is confident that he's bringing in something that's going to make an impact. But that's a story for another time, let's worry about tonight. This is Lonny's return bout after his run with a suspension...the fucker. I'm going to learn him good! Quinn's chicanery is negated by the presence of Andrews and Mathias uses the power of "M-A-G is pissed at Lonny Richards getting suspended" to land the Goliath Gore for the pin. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Backstage, the Lonely Girls are being asked about their rematch against Eclypse and Naomi Bailey. Faith and Jenna claim that they've captured lightning in a bottle and that they're not letting it go anytime soon. Jenna may not have won the Women's Title last night but there's still an opportunity to get one over on Naomi. At Unforgiven, Eclypse and Naomi will get their second shot at history and from the looks of things, they might not get a third if they end up blowing it. This leads to Eclypse and Naomi interrupting the proceedings. Naomi accuses Faith and Jenna of knowing a thing or two about blowing. The champions take offense to this and drop their belts and look like they're going to get physical. Naomi responds in kind but Eclypse puts a stop to anything starting by declaring that she and Naomi are saving it for Unforgiven. Naomi looks annoyed at Eclyspe and asks what the hell is her problem. Eclypse counters that she needs Naomi at 100%. Naomi counters that if Eclypse cared about having a partner at 100% she wouldn't have punched Naomi in the face last night. Jenna and Faith look at each other akwardly and quietly back away leaving Eclypse and Naomi in each others' face.

Second Match: Shawn Dangerson, Caleb Greene, Stanley Coleman, Josh Turmell vs. Miles Shawcross, Zachary Vale, Joey Osbourne, Tom Foley
This is totally not a showcase for the cruiserweights to hype the gauntlet for next week. No siree, Bob. Regardless, there's quite a pool of people who could be involved in that match. It's a wild affair to say the least that comes down to Dangerson and Foley. Dangerson is the new hotness that the people DEMAND get his due and thus manages to lock in the Danger Zone for the tap out win. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Backstage, Brooke barges into the office of Lisa Benton. Brooke is sick of the red tape and games that Lisa is playing. Lisa has always been jealous of Brooke's career and knows that Brooke was always superior and now Lisa is using her position to take whatever little bits of petty revenge that she can. Brooke DEMANDS that Lisa name Salvatore Scabbia as the number one contender to the Unified World Title or Brooke will have to take things up with Lisa's bosses. Lisa counters with how she's not going to get into it with Brooke in regards to their careers because that's the past. Lisa is looking to the future, specifically this upcoming Raw, where Salvatore Scabbia can join 19 other men in a battle royal to see who will get a Unified World Title match the minute Carmichael is medically cleared. "Now I DEMAND that you get the hell out of my office."

Elsewhere backstage, Eddy Clash is back again still with the Money in the Bank briefcase and still harrassing officials over wanting to cash in. They're trying to reclaim the briefcase with little success. This is obviously a job for Ziggy Styles! Ziggy wants Eddy to calm down and think things over rationally. That briefcase doesn't belong to Eddy, that's just a simple fact. Besides, even if Eddy was the real Money in the Bank holder there's no way a delusional loser like him could even successfully cash in the contract! So let's just drop the whole thing, give up the briefcase, and join Ziggy Styles in getting Ziggy with it! Eddy looks puzzled so Ziggy just decides to make a play for the briefcase. He's not strong enough and Eddy just shoves him away sending him into some tables. Officials continue to try to deal with Eddy as we move on....

Third Match: Kyle Jacobs vs. Romeo Valiente
Xavier Cross is on commentary gloating about possibly being the guy who will end the line of Jacobs before it ever gets really started. The lineage can only get worse from Kyle, he declares, so better to ends things now so it doesn't get too embarrassing. Anyhow, this is mainly for Kyle's benefit, even though the rating would indicate a back-and-forth competitive match. Jacobs gets the win with the Legacy Bomb for the pin and exchanges glares with Cross. *****, 94% overall.

Fourth Match: The Play Pals vs. Galino & Farnes
Yay, more hot tag team action! The Play Pals want to talk about how humiliated they are after the last two shows dealing with the Royal Effect. They were such big meanies. Maybe they should just go cry in a corner. Maybe they should give up. Maybe the wrestling business is just too hard because the Royal Effect are in it and they're so awesome and big and virile! Or maybe the Royal Effect can go to hell with the Play Pals' feet in their ass! The Play Pals aren't going away and it doesn't matter if it's McKay and Kavovit or these two law school dunces right here, the Play Pals always come back stronger than ever! That aside we get some awesome action here. The Royal Effect, however, take umbrage to the Play Pals' mere continued existence and decide to get some more of them by running in for the DQ. Things look bad for the faces BUT HERE COMES DEMIRAS AND LASALLE!!! It's four-on-four and the heels manage to get driven off. CRUISERWEIGHT POWER! *****, 94% overall.

Backstage, we're blessed to get an interview with Quentin McDaniels. He reveals that Lisa Benton told him that he is one of the 20 men that will be competing on Raw to be named the number one contender to Noah Carmichael's Unified World Title. Quentin doesn't care what Brooke and Salvatore Scabbia have to say and it certainly doesn't matter who is the actual owner of the Money in the Bank contract. NO ONE has more unfinished business with Noah Carmichael than Quentin McDaniels. Everyone in that battle royal had better understand that.

Fifth Match: Alexander Piero vs. Chris Collins
Haven't really done much with Collins so here we are. He also informs us that he'll be part of that 20-man field on Raw but he's more than happy to take the time to deal with insolent little upstarts like Alexander Piero who think they're so hot. A pretty solid outing as Piero suprises Collins with his ability to keep up with the veteran. It's the story of Piero's career so far. Sadly, Collins uses Madison as a human shield to slow down Piero's momentum and a cheap shot to the eye after that distraction allows Collins to take over. Back to the ring Collins lands the Fall From Heaven for the pin. ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp and Ozzy Mandias vs. The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody and Brandon Reigns
Reigns rubs his temples in the hopes of quelling what is sure to be a massive headache during Hotbody's introduction. Hotbody seems not too keen on participating too much here as he spends most of his time as the not legal man making googly eyes at Luscious and occasionaly locking lips here and there. It boils down to Von Kamp and Reigns in a hot ending. Seth looks like he's setting up Reigns for the Collapse of Society but Luscious leaps onto Seth's back and rakes his eyes. She gets tossed off eventually but that's enough for Reigns to go low and hit a small package for the cheap win. Reigns gets an evil smirk on his face and takes the Intercontinental Title belt. He looks like he's going to take off with it but Ozzy drop kicks him from behind sending Reigns stumbling to the outside. Reigns continues to have a bad week. *****, 94% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%

I love Eddy Clash continuing to turn up every week and being so big that nobody can pry the briefcase away from him. I'm interested in seeing where it goes because while the logical progression would be Clash vs. Reigns, I wonder if Clash will truck some people in-ring first.

Reigns almost becoming clinically depressed at having to deal with Hotbody's nonsense on top of everything else he's dealing with :lol:

Cruiserweight gauntlet is gonna be tight.....like a dozen guys have a genuine beef with Hotbody so it could go in so many directions.

Naomi and Jenna killing it as you'd expect, 5 star goodness all around and I'm sure the tag rematch will be no different.

I also popped for Lonny getting jobbed out in his return from suspension. That's pretty much a house rule with me, you're always jobbing the first match or two back. Meanwhile WWE gave The Usos the titles again a week after Jimmy Uso had his 300th DUI.

I'm reaching the point where I'm going to put Eddy in the ring. I have a spot for him in mind for Unforgiven. I think Ziggy is the perfect guinea pig to get smeared for his debut.

Hotbody seems like the kind of guy who wouldn't have anybody hanging around him unless he was paying them. A fellow heel that would just get sick of his shit and smack him into next week would be the biggest face on the roster.

The women's thing has been cooking for me. I'm on a good path but I need to figure out how to weave Sonya Braddock back into the picture. She's been gone long enough and there are some bitches that need murdering.

If you ever brought back a brand split for whatever reason, you could literally give the women their own show and still get gigantic ratings.

If only real life women's wrassling was this compelling.

I've often debated the idea of making Superstars exclusively for cruiserweights and the women, with a little bit of the rest of the roster sprinkled in, here and there. If nothing else it'd give Hotbody an excuse to give himself another title, like GM of Superstars or whatever the fuck. I know I had made plans to do a whole promotion exclusively with the women but I lost interest. Starting from scratch kind of puts me off. Of course the alternative is to just fire every male performer I've got right now and just rebrand but that sounds like quite the task itself.

"HERE ARE YOUR WINNERS AND NEWWWWWWWWWWWW WOMEN'S TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS...LUSCIOUS AND....Michelle Hotbody?!?!?!"

As hilarious as that would be, I'm also having Santina flashbacks. :lol:

Raw - September 10, 2040

Opening Match: Nigel Gallagher, Caleb Greene, and Stanley Coleman vs. Doug Michaels, Joey Osbourne, and Zachary Vale
Winners get to participate in the cruiserweight gauntlet this Thursday on Superstars. Not much in regards to the crowd reaction but it's a good opener regardless. Nigel is a future top prospect. I can feel it in my bones. Not as much as Zachary Vale feels Nigel's Union Smack but close enough. Nigel nailing his finisher on Vale is enough for the pin and to send the faces into the gauntlet. ****1/2, 88% overall.

Backstage we get to hear from Chris Collins ahead of his participation in tonight's main event. Apparently Madison suffered an injury as a result of what went down in his match against Alexander Piero on Superstars. (This is actually true. She'll be out for two months.) Collins suggests that Piero is to blame for having her out there in the first place. Collins can't control everything that happens out in that ring. Tonight is the exception. Tonight he'll outlast nineteen other men and he'll be challenging for the Unified World Title...while Piero cries to himself over his failures.

Elsewhere backstage we catch Eddy Clash apparently chasing someone. Lisa Benton intercepts him and asks what the hell he's doing. Eddy responds that he saw Noah Carmichael and that he's trying to chase him down so he can challenge him for the Unified World Title! Tonight's the night that Eddy can cash in the Money in the Bank contract! Lisa Benton tells Eddy that this nonsense has gone on long enough. She tries to explain that Eddy is NOT a contracted wrestler and that the briefcase doesn't belong to him. He needs to hand it over right now because she's not dealing with all of the legal nonsense that Galino & Farnes have tried to give to her over this whole ordeal. Eddy says that this is a dream for him to be in the WWE.

Cue Brandon Reigns who is pissed as all hell and makes a play for the briefcase. Lisa gets in the way and tries to back Reigns off, yelling at him that she'll handle this. Reigns declares that it's too late for that because she should have handled this a long time ago. He yells at Eddy to give him back the briefcase before things get really ugly. Lisa again warns Reigns to back off. If he allows her to handle this right now, Reigns can pick the stipulation for his rematch against Seth Von Kamp for the Intercontinental Title. Reigns calms down a bit and questions Lisa if she's serious. Lisa confirms that she is but he needs to back off and not get physical here.

She turns her attention back to Eddy and again points out that he's not a wrestler in the WWE...but he can be. What if Lisa were to provide Eddy Clash the chance to be a member of the WWE roster? Reigns is taken back by this and questions what the hell Lisa is trying to pull. She warns him again to back off. Lisa offers Eddy a way into the WWE, but he has to hand her the briefcase right now. The only other alternative is legal action and that's an avenue that she's not looking forward to. All Eddy has to do is surrender the briefcase and he can have a tryout match on Superstars where if he wins, he gets signed. What's it going to be?

Eddy hesitates a bit but ultimately gives the case to Lisa, asking if he has her word. Lisa says yes as she hands the briefcase back to Reigns. Reigns tells Eddy that he got lucky and that for his own sake, he'd better hope he loses on Superstars as he takes his leave. Lisa calls for security to escort Eddy out as she says she'll see him this Thursday.

Second Match: Eclypse vs. Faith Connors
Jenna and Naomi have been given their fair share of time so I figure why not go with their partners to help keep the feud going? Faith, of course, plays rag doll as she's got the underdog babyface thing down to a science. It's a hot affair that unfortunately can't have a decisive conclusion just yet as they tumble to the outside and it's a double countout. Eclypse has Faith at her mercy and it looks like there's going to some more punishment dealt out after the bell but Eclypse hesitates and decides to walk away. Hmmmm.... *****, 95% overall. I have high hopes for the rematch.

Third Match: 10-Man Battle Royal
Winner gets added to the cruiserweight gauntlet. Your participants are as follows:
Marc Fury
El Silencio
Isaac Wolff
Johnny Dangeron
Sammy Brady
Patrick Dean Quartermaine
Romeo Valiente
Shawn Dangerson
Josh Turmell
Lyle Morris

DANGERSON VS. DANGERSON!!! OK, not quite but it's still a fun match. It comes down to Shawn Dangerson and Romeo Valiente as the final two. There's just no way Shawn can pull this out. He's finished. Done for. It's over. He can't possibly overcome the od...no, wait, there goes Valiente as Dangerson ducks a charge and that's enought to send Dangerson to Superstars. 87% overall.

Backstage, Lisa Benton is accosted in her office by Ziggy Styles. Ziggy is disappointed in the lack of people on the roster who want to get Ziggy with it. He hopes above all other hopes that a great fun-loving woman like Lisa Benton won't also disappoint him. She's strong and confident and capable and deals with a lot in her line of work. Hell, she did what nobody else could in regards to dealing with Eddy Clash and the briefcase situation. So what does Lisa say? Can she find it in herself to let down that hair once again and get Ziggy with it? Lisa steps in close and nods her head as she claims that she can in fact get Ziggy with it. In fact, all of the audience who tunes into Superstars this Thursday are going to get Ziggy with it, because Ziggy Styles is going to be Eddy Clash's opponent. Lisa proceeds to invite him to get out of her office.

Elsewhere backstage we get to hear from Xavier Cross. He's involved in tonight's main event as he's looking to become the number one contender but almost as important, he looking for another piece of Kyle Jacobs. These rookie johnny-come-latelies are pissing Xavier Cross off. They all need to pay tribute and respect to the people who have been busting their ass for years. Of all the things that Kyle learned from his dad and uncle, he couldn't learn humility. That's OK; Xavier Cross can just beat it into him.

Fourth Match: Galino & Farnes vs. The Tokyo Titans
Luscious accompanies Galino & Farnes as the three of them want to make it a point that Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle are public enemies, numbers 1 and 2! They can decide amongst the two of them which is which. It doesn't really matter because the sentiment is the same. The conspiracy that the two of them have been cooking up against their client, the Cruiserweight Champion, Michael Hotbody is enough to call into question whether or not major lawsuits are in order. Hotbody cannot perform his duties as champion when his well-being is constantly at risk. The fact that the two of them are going to be involved in this Thursday's gauntlet match is a disgrace! The only thing Demiras and LaSalle deserve is what Galino & Farnes plan on dishing out to them. The match here only puts an exclamation point on their grievances as the Tokyo Titans gets a good dismantling. Wu tries a heroic comeback but Luscious is the X factor and her interference is enough to allow Galino & Farnes to hit SERIOUS INQUIRIES!!! for the pin. Luscious blows kisses at the camera and waves to Michael Hotbody declaring that she misses her boo. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Backstage, Eclypse and Naomi Bailey have words for Jenna Kyle and Faith Connors. Well, more like Naomi has some words for Eclypse. Naomi is confused as to why Eclypse didn't kick more of Faith's ass earlier. Eclypse is saving it for Unforgiven. She doesn't want the Lonely Girls to have some sort of excuse or for Lisa Benton to pull one of them out of the match. If Naomi's got a problem with that then the so-called Women's Champion can go fend for herself. Eclypse departs leaving Naomi upset.

Fifth Match: The Glamour Brigade vs. The Internet Darlings
Mmmmm....ladies tag division. The charisma of the faces kind of drags things down a tad but the heels definitely make up for it. Either of these teams would make good challengers down the line. C.J. uses some heelery to score a cheap pin using the ropes. ****1/2, 91% overall.

MAIN EVENT: 20-Man Battle Royal for the Number One Contendership to the WWE Unified World Title
Your participants are as follows:
Cameron Harper
Chris Collins
Clubber Harris
Gavin Jones
Kerry Cemenko
King Kavovit
Kyle Jacobs
Lonny Richards
Michael Haywood
Moses McKay
Orlando Kincaid
Quinten McDaniels
Raymond Delaney
Ronnie Costello
Ryan Pattillo
Salvatore Scabbia
Seth Von Kamp
Stone Walsh
Wrakk
Xavier Cross

Let's cover the highlights. Brooke makes it clear to Ronnie Costello that he needs to watch the back of Salvatore Scabbia. Alexander Piero in the midst of all the chaos decides to run in and make a beeline for Chris Collins in an attempt to fight for Madison's honor. Officials manage to get him out of the ring but Collins is vulnerable to the point where he gets tossed by Ryan Pattillo. The Play Pals and the Royal Effect take each other out as their feud continues. That whole "watch Scabbia's back" thing doesn't really pan out for Costello because as soon as he helps Scabbia avoid elimination, he gets tossed by Seth Von Kamp. Seth doesn't get to celebrate for long as Brandon Reigns runs in and clobbers him from behind with his briefcase. Seth gets tossed by Wrakk soon after. It boils down to Wrakk, Pattillo, and Scabbia. Wrakk has Pattillo on the ropes when the lights flicker and then turn off. When they're back on HAVEN IS ON THE OUTSIDE IN THE FACE OF WRAKK! Wrakk is aghast at this turn of events but the lights turn back off. Upon them coming back up Haven is gone and Wrakk is confused. This leads to Pattillo tossing him over leaving it down to Scabbia and Pattillo. Scabbia is on the rocks and it looks like Pattillo has this well in hand but Wrakk is FURIOUS and returns to dismantle Pattillo. Officials try their damndest to get Wrakk out of there and that's enough commotion for Scabbia to bounce back and toss Pattillo and win the whole thing. Scabbia is officially the number one contender! Noah Carmichael walks out on stage to face down his challenger, belts held high as we go off the air. 85% overall.

Overall show rating: 86%

So the gauntlet will be 10 guys and will obviously take up the bulk of the show on Thursday. Here are the participants:

Martyn LaSalle
Miles Shawcross
Jason Sorola
Jordan Demiras
Ozzy Mandias
Shawn Dangerson
Jerome McDougal
Caleb Greene
Stanley Coleman
Nigel Gallagher

:shifty:

https://i.imgur.com/SvuNflJ.png

She's going to kick my ass when she finds out what I'm using our pictures for. :lol:

As a big mark for battle royals, I love the idea of having two of them in the same night. And there is enough talent to justify it. It's hard to get good overall ratngs from battle royals, usually even one un-over guy will sink the rating into the 70s, so to get mid to high 80s for both is awesome. Great way to mix and match loads of programs into a neat little package, plus using most of your heavyweights knowing the next show will be centered on the gauntlet.

Hell if the WCW World War 3 battle royal were in this game you could probably put your whole roster in there and get in the 80s.

Eddy Clash is gonna kill Ziggy Styles dead and I'm all for it. Bonus points if he has a Clash song as his finisher name.

Popped hard for the SERIOUS INQUIRIES!!! finisher for G&F

:lol:

Really good morale, must've gotten her a nice stimulus package

It's vitally important that she remains heavily stimulated. It's only fair that I return the favor.

Superstars: September 13, 2040

Lisa Benton starts things off for us here tonight. She reminds us of the major events that are going to unfold. First and foremost, we'll all see whether or not 'Big Thunder' Eddy Clash has what it takes to join the ranks of the top talent here in the WWE. He gets his opportunity against Ziggy Styles where he must win if he is to be signed. Secondly, the gauntlet match where the winner will be declared the number one contender to Michael Hotbody's Cruiserweight Title. There will be ten men in total, each match with a 15-minute time limit. Last, but certainly not least, the main event which will pit Xavier Cross and the Money in the Bank holder Brandon Reigns against Kyle Jacobs and the WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp.

First Match: Eddy Clash vs. Ziggy Styles
Ziggy talks about his fruitless efforts in the last few weeks to find people in the WWE who have wanted to just have a good time and get Ziggy with it. He feels bad that he's only going to add to that pile when he inevitably disappoints Eddy Clash tonight by beating him and keeping him out of the WWE. However, even though one dream will die that doesn't mean another can't take its place. And that dream is a WWE where everyone is down with Ziggy Styles and free from any sort of Debbie Downer losers like Eddy Clash! Eddy naturally is miffed at these words but looks prepped and ready to go. This is actually the in-ring debut of both of these guys. Clash doesn't have the high stats has Ziggy does but they mesh well enough here to get a pretty good outing. The charisma probably helps. Anyways, Ziggy gets overwhelmed as it's just not his night and Eddy is too determined. Clash hits the Thunderstrike to score the pin and win himself a contract into the WWE! Sure it's not the name of a Clash song but it's early in his career, so who knows? ****1/4, 85% overall.

CRUISERWEIGHT GAUNTLET:
Before we get cooking the 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody decides to saunter down to the ring and proclaim that he is incredibly interested in who will come out on top here tonight, even though there are CERTAIN PEOPLE who shouldn't even be involved in this contest because he's already dealt with them before. He's not going to name names but they know who they are!!! That's right, he's talking to Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle!!! Again, not to name names or anything. Regardless of what transpires, Hotbody declares that he's going to plant himself at that announce table and help call the action while doing some important scouting. He wishes the best of luck to the participants EXCEPT FOR CERTAIN PEOPLE!!! And with that, away we go....

First Round: Nigel Gallagher vs. Stanley Coleman
These poor guys have the distinction of starting the ball. Well somebody's getting disappointed one way or another. It's fast paced and full of lovely cruiserweight goodness as you'd expect, even though the charisma between the two is rough to overcome. Nigel gets the duke after hitting the Union Smack and gets to advance. ****1/2, 86% overall. Hotbody makes the claim that Nigel shouldn't be in contention on the grounds that nobody can understand what he says half of the time.

Second Round: Nigel Gallagher vs. Caleb Greene
GREENE IS OUT FOR REVENGE FOR HIS DEFEATED PARTNER!!! SMELL THE RIVALRY!!! OK, not really but it's a hell of a competitive match. A bit too competitive as neither guy is willing to stay down for long and unfortunately we reach the inevitable as the time limit expires and both men are out of the running. Boooooooooo! ****1/2, 86% overall. Hotbody declares that Caleb is a terrible friend and partner to Stanley Coleman and that's why he couldn't come out on top here.

Third Round: Martyn LaSalle vs. Jerome McDougal
Hotbody is understandably nervous as he talks during this contest. Some awesome fire is displayed here between the two and it's the most engaging as far as the crowd reaction goes. LaSalle manages to lock in the Martynizer to score the tap out win and advance much to the chagrin of Hotbody at ringside. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Fourth Round: Martyn LaSalle vs. Jordan Demiras
SMELL THE DRAMA!!! Close as these two have been since Jordan's return there's still a title shot on the line here and thus they kick it into 5th gear. It's a classic to be sure. Hotbody ponders over how it would be something if both of these guys got knocked out of the running. Joey Styles responds that it is possible under the rules. Hotbody finds that interesting. It looks like the match will go the distance but HERE COME GALINO & FARNES! They attack both men and beat them down and the ref calls for the bell to throw the whole thing out. Hotbody is SHOCKED AND APPALLED that Galino & Farnes would commit such actions and ruin things for Demiras and LaSalle! Officials come out to break things up as we've got pandemonium. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Fifth Round: Miles Shawcross vs. Shawn Dangerson
Well we can't dwell on the past as we move on after everybody has been cleared from the area. We're essentially down the final three. This is on track to the best of the series. Dangerson gets the submission win with the Danger Zone! He regroups and backs away as he prepares for his next opponent. WAIT! JASON SOROLA RUNS IN FROM BEHIND TO ATTACK DANGERSON! *****, 94% overall.

Sixth Round: Shawn Dangerson vs. Jason Sorola
We're not wasting any time apparently as Sorola is on the attack after his less than sportsmanlike entrance. Hotbody makes the claim that he would have warned Dangerson if he had seen Sorola. These guys have got themselves some history. As good as the last bout was this one is even better. Dangerson is in trouble as he's down and out and Sorola looks to capitalize with a Frog Splash. Dangerson recovers and drop kicks Sorola off the top rope sending him to the outside. That was a pretty nasty tumble. Nasty to the point where it causes Sorola to get counted out giving Dangerson the win and sending him to the final round. *****, 96% overall.

FINAL ROUND: Shawn Dangerson vs. Ozzy Mandias
Ozzy has the luck of the draw as he's facing a tired Dangerson. Hotbody avoids the question of who he'd rather like to face. Sorola has to be escorted away as he's throwing a fit over the last match. Even match between these two that comes down to them ending up on the outside triggering a 10-count. The ref has his back turned as he checks on Ozzy and that's the opening that Jason Sorola needs as he makes his return in a fit and nails Dangerson from behind before bolting into the crowd. Now the ref checks on Dangerson as the count continues and Hotbody takes the opportunity to help Ozzy back into the ring but that darn Coriolis effect kicks in and screws up his aim and Ozzy ends up colliding with the ring post. Hotbody returns to his announcing post as the ref reaches the count of ten and that's a double countout as we end with no winner. Hotbody displays his disappointment at this turn of events as he takes his leave. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Third (???) Match: The Jersey Experience vs. The Southern Belles
Maybe some hot women can put the crowd at ease after getting the shaft over that last turn of events. The Southern Belles would be a good set of challengers down the road. Bobbi Jo uses the custom mic on Frankie to score the cheap pin. ****1/2, 91% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Xavier Cross and Brandon Reigns vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp and Kyle Jacobs
Reigns gets on the mic and reminds everyone of the fact that he ONCE AGAIN is the possessor of the Money in the Bank briefcase. True, he doesn't have plans to cash it in until WrestleMania BUT IT'S THE PRINCIPLE OF THE MATTER!!! He plans on making everyone responsible for last week's headache pay starting with Seth Von Kamp. Seth may be sitting pretty but Reigns gets to name the stipulation for his rematch for the Intercontinental Title and he promises it will be the kind of match that Seth will never forget. Neither Reigns or Seth seem interested in tagging in their respective partners as they've got a lot to settle between them. Finally Cross makes a blind tag when the opportunity arises. Reigns is miffed at this and the two heels argue amongst themselves. Jacobs decides to get off his ass and drop kicks Cross into Reigns knocking Reigns out of the ring and that sets up Cross for the Collapse of Society for the pin. *****, 95% overall.

Overall show rating: 91%

I would also like to point out that I'd mark the fuck out if my "Luscious" was able to bust out a 450 splash.

Nice debut for Clash. I love that we live in a world where ****1/4 is a "pretty good outing"

And the gauntlet was the goods as expected. I can only imagine Hotbody on commentary being relatively nonchalant most of the time only to start shitting a cookie once Dangerson is in there.

Dangerson the MVP of the match of course, in there the longest plus multiple consecutive ***** outings. Real shame Ozzy couldn't make it back into the ring. What ever shall they do about resolving this cruiserweight dilemma? I trust Galino and Farnes will do their best to make sure Hotbody is not put into an unfair and unruly multi-man atrocity!

SmackDown!: September 14, 2040

We open with our glorious leader, Lisa Benton, as she announces that we will be kicking things off by officially signing the newest addition to the WWE roster. He is the man who heard opportunity knocking and did not hesitate to answer the call. Things might have started out a bit sketchy and this isn't part of the official channel as far as these things go but the bottom line is once again 2040 makes a case for being the year of the rookie as we all welcome the man they call Big Thunder. Ladies and gentlemen, Eddy Clash!

Eddy makes his way out and he's already got theme music! He joins Lisa in the ring as he prepares to sign his contract. Lisa continues on the mic: "Eddy Clash, all cards on the table, you caused me quite a few headaches over the last few weeks. Just two weeks ago on this very program you sat in that crowd just everyone else here and you had fate basically fall into your lap. Then came all of the chaos that you stirred up with Brandon Reigns and Ziggy Styles and everyone else trying to reason with you. I have to admit I was hesitant to offer you what I did on Superstars because I am not about to send the message to any potential hopefuls out there that might want to think that what you did was the way into the WWE. No, far from it. But I know the kinds of people who can make impacts and I'm telling you right now, Eddy, I believe that you can make an impact as a member of the WWE roster. So with that said, by all means, take that step towards superstardom and let's get these documents signed."

Eddy Clash takes the pen with extreme excitment and eagerness and is ready to sign...BUT HOLD THE PHONE!!! Here comes Luscious to make a nuisance of herself! She gets into the ring with Lisa and Eddy and bares her soul.

"Lisa, Lisa, Lisa, who are you kidding? You only went through all of this so that you could avoid all of that legal pile up that my crack legal team, Galino & Farnes, was ready to cram down your throat! Truth be told, I don't think even this puts you out of the woods! As we speak Galino & Farnes are combing through the proper references but I speak for them when I say that we're talking criminal trespass, larceny, assault, and severe emotional distress to Brandon Reigns! THAT'S how Eddy Clash's entrance into the WWE should be remembered, not this farce that you're forcing us all to witness. Eddy, you had better think long and hard about putting your name on that dotted line because if you sign, you're basically agreeing to be a part of this sham of an administration!"

Lisa responds with annoyance, "Listen. Don't come walking up here talking about others needing to do the right thing when YOUR boyfriend decided to make a mess out of the cruiserweight gaunlet last night. Since you're so keen on speaking for your close circle of friends how about you clue all of us in as to what the hell he was thinking?"

"Woah, woah, woah, hey, look, I don't have ALL the answers; but I can assure you that Michael Hotbody (I love you, boo!) will be here later tonight to address what happened last night and will take the proper steps to make amends. But this isn't about me or Mikey Poo..."

"Jesus Christ..."

"...this is about sending a message to you, Eddy Clash. You have probably the biggest decision you can ever make in front of you. You walk away right now, we can just call this a fun little detour in your life. You know, something to scratch off your bucket list. You sign that contract, you will have the full wrath of the greatest legal team in the WWE brought down upon you!"

Eddy takes the mic after having to listen to all of this and addresses Luscious. "You're right in the sense that this is a huge decision. It's something I've worked for practically all of my life; and I'm not going to be deterred by some blabbermouth in a skirt. In a way I'm almost glad you came down here because I guess I can share a detail about this contract. See this contract actually allows me the right to choose my first opponent as an official member of the WWE roster. And I can't think of a better night than this Monday on Raw to make it so. I'll sign this and show up..." Eddy signs the contract as he continues "...and you, Luscious, can bring one of those so-called legal experts and they can try bringing some of that wrath you were talking about. See you on Monday." And with that Eddy Clash hands the contract back to Lisa Benton and takes his leave as Luscious pouts.

Backstage, Chris Collins wants to set the record straight with Alexander Piero. Piero had no business getting involved in the main event on Raw. Collins already made it clear that what happened to Madison last week was NOT HIS PROBLEM! Piero is too damn emotional for this business if he is going to pull stunts like what he did on Raw. Piero made it personal by costing Collins a chance at the Unified World Title and that's something he can't just overlook. If Piero wants to push this, Madison is going to be the best case scenario.

First Match: Lonny Richards and The Perfections vs. Mathias and The Jersey Experience
Hopefully Lonny has learned his lesson. Anyways this is more for the benefit of Leah and Bonnie Beckham because, as Nathan Quinn points out, they're hungry for the Women's Tag Team Titles and deserve a shot once all of the drama Jenna and Faith are dealing with gets wrapped up. It's certainly a possibility that Eclypse and Naomi can take the belts but Leah and Bonnie want the Lonely Girls so that they can be exposed for being inferior. They may be great but they are not perfection! Big talk aside this is an awesome match. Quinn thinks he can make it awesomer by distracting Jamie Roderick and that allows Leah to take advantage and hit the Sultry Splash for the pin. ****1/4, 87% overall

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He's got a whiteboard with him in the ring and we wants to let us know that he's going to help clear up what went down last night at the conclusion of the cruiserweight gauntlet. "Now for those who didn't tune in to Superstars last night, I was seated at the announce table so that I could have a first-hand look at who was going to be my challenger for my Cruiserweight Title. I'm all about competition and giving the opportunity of a lifetime to those who deserve it. Now, minus TWO CERTAIN PEOPLE, almost everyone in that match was deserving of a championship match and between the final two, Shawn Dangerson and Ozzy Mandias, I don't think I could pick who I'd want to face. Regardless, they were putting on a hell of a clinic and I didn't want to see it end in any sort of draw so I tried to help Ozzy Mandias back into the ring in the hopes that maybe the match could continue. Sadly, though, I'm just one man and I can't fight the physics of the Earth because in my valiant efforts to help Ozzy the Coriolis effect screwed up my aim and that sent Ozzy on the wrong path and he ended up hitting the ringpost. Now that may seem unlikely and it might not be what you wanted to hear but you need to understand something: you people aren't scientists! I actually have a helpful visual aide here in the form of a diagram that can help explain the matter in a way that is sure to be satisfactory to the boss and we can all hopefully move on and work on getting ourselves an actual number one contender. Now if we take a look at this big circle here in the middle you'll notice it's round and curves, OK? Now let's imagine that this smaller circle here is Ozzy Mandias. He's out there doing his thing. Probably not going to win, but, you know, he's trying hard. Tell you what, let's just put a star over him, you know, for effort. Now, this X over here is Shawn Dangerson laid out on the floor. He's not trying as hard so he doesn't get a star. Here's where things get whacky, OK? Ozzy needs to get over here in this square, A.K.A. the ring. It should be easy because it's a straight line but this curve that the Earth has puts a damper on that. That's called the Coriolis effect. So anything that might have happened to Ozzy last night was not my fault. I'm pretty awesome but science is science and there's no fighting science!"

Cue the music of Ozzy Mandias and he saunters into the ring to confront Hotbody. "There may be no fighting science but I sure as hell can fight you! And make no mistake about it, I WILL!"

"Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on; let's not do anything so rash, OK? I said that was going to come out here to explain things BUT I did also say that I was going to try to make things right. I'm absolutely eager to find a number one contender for my title, so here's what I'm going to do. On Raw, not only am I going to find a way to sort out a challenger but I will defend my Cruiserweight Title on that same night! That should make everyone happy, no?"

"I don't know. How about you let me know after you feel this..." Ozzy tries to nail Hotbody with a right hand but the champ drops to the ground and rolls out of the ring and bolts. Perhaps Ozzy ruined his chances?

Backstage in Lisa Benton's office Vivian Merrick decides to drop in and pester the boss. Vivian tells Lisa that the talk that's going around the manager circles is that Paul Andrews has something big that he's getting ready to drop soon. Lisa responds by saying that she's not at liberty to discuss that since things haven't been finalized. Vivian claims that she deserves to know what sort of shady dealings are afoot especially if they're going to concern her tag team champion clients. Lisa again avoids answering but lets Vivian know that there is something coming up that is going to concern the Future Foundation. In two weeks on Superstars, the Unified Tag Team Titles will be on the line in a tag team gauntlet match. Vivian's clients should be VERY concerned about that.

Second Match: Kyle Jacobs vs. Steve Hayes
Giving Jacobs some love here as a possible second encounter with Xavier Cross may be on the horizon. Jacobs gets a solid clean pin fall win here with the Legacy Bomb. ****1/2, 92% overall

Third Match: WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey and Eclypse vs. The Internet Darlings
Naomi wants to tell Eclypse that the two of them need to get on the same page because the small petty nonsense that's been going on between them is going to be the death of them come Unforgiven. She reiterates that the bond between Faith and Jenna is tenuous. The bond between Naomi and Eclypse is family and it can overcome anything. Anyways, this match is the goods as Lauren and Sarah make pretty good stand-ins for Faith and Jenna. The end comes when Eclypse manages to hit the Fade to Black but she stumbles into her corner. Naomi makes a blind tag and gets the pin for herself. Hmmmmm.... ****1/2, 91% overall

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with the Money in the Bank winner, Brandon Reigns. Reigns may not have himself a whiteboard but he does have a contract. No, he's not talking about the Money in the Bank contract. He's talking about the committment that Lisa Benton made to him on Raw. Brandon reminds everyone that he vows on punishing everyone responsible for the bad week he had and it's going to begin at Unforgiven. Lisa Benton was "generous" enough to allow Reigns the privilege of picking what kind of match he's going to have when he challenges Seth Von Kamp for the Intercontinental Title. Seth had one good night and if he wants to drown himself in self-congratulatory ego-stroking, whatever; that's on him. But it's meaningless in the long run because Unforgiven is where Seth's ass is smacked with reality.

Cue the Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp himself making his way out to the stage. He begs Brandon Reigns to just get on with it because he's got better things to do...like keeping his Intercontinental Title nice and shiny. Or congratulating Eddy Clash on making it into the WWE. Anything other than one more minute of Brandon Reigns and his whining. Reigns tells Seth to laugh it up while he still can because he wants everyone to remember this moment. He wants everyone to recall this moment after they finish witnessing what happens to Seth at Unforgiven, when they see his busted up body, with no pride and definitely no title. It's going to be Seth vs. Reigns...Last Man Standing.

Fourth Match: Jason Sorola vs. Jesse Capalbo
Jason gets on the mic and just rips into Shawn Dangerson. Dangerson is nothing more than a choke artist who just happened to luck into a semi-competent manager. Yeah, Jason may have attacked Dangerson last night but let's be honest; it's not like he was going to win the gauntlet anyway! Dangerson couldn't get the pin or the tap out on Jason Sorola so he had no business in that final match and if Dangerson has a problem with that Jason Sorola won't have any problem once again teaching him who his daddy is! Good match here as Sorola is fired up. He scores a pin by using the tights but he can't celebrate for long as Shawn Dangerson runs in afterward to try to get some payback. THE FEUD MUST CONTINUE! ****1/2, 92% overall

Fifth Match: The Wyldhearts vs. Southern Gentlemen
The Wyldhearts are miffed at the loss of Madison and they want to let Chris Collins know that they, too, have a beef with him. They vow to try to make it into the tag team gauntlet so that they can win the titles in her honor. We get an awesome display of tag team wrestling as we've got 4 guys completely comfortable in their roles. Chris Collins walks down the ramp apparently offended at the Wyldhearts' comments. This brings Alexander Piero out as he once again tries to get him some of Collins. The whole ordeal allows the Wyldhearts to hit Brody Lee with the Heartstopper and get the pin. Officials come out to try to separate Piero and Collins. *****, 96% overall

MAIN EVENT: Wrakk and The Royal Effect vs. The Hunters
Wrakk is in a mood as he wants to get on Haven's case for being on Raw. You would have thought that Haven learned his lesson at SummerSlam but apparently he didn't get enough. In the meantime, there is a perfect surrogate in Ryan Pattillo here that can suffer the consequences. Realistically this is more about the Royal Effect and The Play Pals as we no doubt move closer to finally ending that feud. Chances are they'll both be in that tag team championship gauntlet in a few weeks. Needless to say Wrakk needs the victory more than anybody else here so thus we get ending where McKay drops Gavin throat first on the top rope and Wrakk hits the Demon Cross for the pin. ****1/2, 94% overall

Overall show rating: 88%

Eddy Clash the latest man to have SERIOUS BUSINESS to adhere to with the Hotbody Brigade. I love how they are ostensibly feuding with everybody on the roster, because everybody hates their guts.

I can't imagine why everybody hates him. He had the good decency to explain the Coriolis effect to everyone. Screw Damien Sandow, Michael Hotbody is the true Intellectual Savior of the Masses!

I love Superstars turning into the de-facto gauntlet show. Knowing the experience levels of your teams I think I can start the over/under at 39.5 stars for the entire thing.

All in on an SVK/Reigns Last Man Standing match. SVK has been a revelation once the decision was made to give him a push.

Began to write some more but got distracted with finding more ways to customize some of the profile pics. :o

Raw: September 17, 2040

Opening Match: Lonny Richards, The Perfections, Eclypse, and the WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey vs. Mathias, The Glitz Girls, and the WWE Women's Tag Team Champions The Lonely Girls
That's a lot of ass in an opening contest! :eek: It's a pretty weird reversal of the usual dynamic in mixed-tag matches where it's mostly guys and two women. We know where the heat is in this match anyway. Naomi wants to point out that her and Eclypse are A WELL-OILED MACHINE and that things will continue to go their way because she's the captain and she calls the shots AS A CHAMPION SHOULD! Eclypse apparently shares this sentiment in her own way by giving Naomi the stink eye throughout the match. It's a wild opener and things come to a head as once again Jenna Kyle is at the mercy of Naomi Bailey. Eclypse feels like one good turn deserves another and decides to tag herself in. This, of course, leads to some calm rational debate over the matter between Eclypse and Naomi...minus the calm and the rational. Bonnie Beckham takes advantage by tagging herself in and trying her luck but Jenna recovers and small packages Bonnie for the pin as Faith dropkicks Eclypse and Naomi. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Backstage we're joined by Vivian Merrick and her clients, the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Future Foundation. They want to talk about the level of unfairness that's going to go down next week on Superstars in the gauntlet match for their titles. As great as a team that they are, going through all of the competition in one night is going to put them at a severe disadvantage when they make it to the end. All it's going to take is some lucky pair of vultures to pounce on a moment of weakness and the titles can be kissed goodbye. The very least that Lisa Benton can do is let the Future Foundation go last! They warn any team that will be participating to look sharp and pound down those energy drinks because the Future Foundation can be vicious vultures, too.

It's time for The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody to join us as he looks ready to apparently defend his Cruiserweight Title! He's got Luscious with him and something on a table underneath a cloth. He grabs the mic and addresses the crowd.

"Alright, the time has come for me to help put an end to whatever questions and concerns people may have regarding the number one contender to my Cruiserweight Title. Last week was supposed to solve that little problem but science, unfortunately, won out in that arena so here we are. I promised you all that I would take care of things and thus you will all see a number one contender get named AND you will also see that challenger get their championship match, right here, right now! Now, I have consulted with my legal team and they have made sure that anything that goes down here tonight is on the up and up and totally legit. So without further ado, Luscious, let's do this!"

Luscious performs a slight flourish before removing the cloth covering whatever is on the table. We get the reveal of a tumbler underneath and Hotbody continues his spiel.

"Now, what I did, in order to be FAIR AND EQUAL is pop a bunch of names of potential candidates who will be able to challenge me tonight into this container. The lovely Luscious is going to give this a spin and we're going to pick out a name and that person will get their chance at glory by facing me for the Cruiserweight Title. It will be TOTALLY RANDOM and TOTALLY FAIR! This way, everyone has an equal chance, nobody's feelings get hurt. Just a luck of the draw situation. So let's get to it. Take it away, Luscious!"

At Hotbody's instruction, Luscious turns the crank and shuffles things around for a moment before reaching in and pulling out a name and handing it to Hotbody to read out.

"Alright, here we go. Referee, get ready to ring the bell and call this match down the middle! Tonight...your number one contender and my worthy opponent....EL DANDY!!! El Dandy, get your ass down here right now! This has been a long time coming between you and me so let's do this, Frenchie! I'm not afraid of you! Come on, boy! This is a chance of a lifetime, don't keep us waiting! Come on, where are you?!?"

Eventually enough time passes to where Luscious merely shrugs her shoulders and Hotbody gives up. "Alright, fine! Be that way! You didn't really deserve to face me anyway! You want to sit on your ass? FINE BY ME! That's a forfeit win for me! Now, we still need to deliver on a match as promised, though, so Luscious, let's try this again. Show me what you got!"

Luscious responds by doing a sexy little twirl, indeed showing him what she's got, before going to the tumbler again. She pulls out another name and hands it to Hotbody.

"OK, I think this is the one. THIS PERSON will be the one who's got some stones and will actually come out here and face me like a man! I can feel it! Alright, let's open this sucker up and find out who's the lucky winner. I will be defending my Cruiserweight Title against....THE BIG SHOW! Wait, what? OK, Luscious, come on now! What is this? He's not even a cruiserweight! And even if he were to face me I'd mop the floor with him so quickly these people would be rightfully upset about getting ripped off! They came to see a match for this championship and that's what we're going to give them. Come on, let's try this again. This is serious!"

Apparently Lisa Benton has seen enough of this nonsense as she pops on the screen to interrupt. "Hotbody. Luscious. This is ridiculous and you're wasting valuable time on my show. This has gone far enough. You don't want to actually take this seriously? I'll do it for you."

"Hey, I am taking this ser...!"

"SHUT UP! This is what's going to happen, Michael. You promised a championship match tonight, so I'm going to hold you to it. So you're going to pull another name out of that tumbler and I don't care if it's not even a cruiserweight or even a real person. I am ordering the official to ring the bell and if it's another B.S. pick where no one shows up YOU WILL FORFEIT the Cruiserweight Title. So you had better hope for your sake that there's a name in there that can actually compete because it's your ass on the line. So by all means, proceed."

The referee calls for the bell and it looks like this is going to be official. Luscious and Hotbody look like they're at a loss as to what to do. Hotbody eventually motions for Luscious to pull out a name and she reluctantly does so. The referee grabs the name and leans into the microphone to call it out. "It's....Luscious?"

Luscious shits the proverbial brick and Hotbody throws a fit. The ref reminds us that this is an official match as the ring crew removes the table and tumbler from the ring. Both Hotbody and Luscious continue to look puzzled and hesitant. Hotbody shrugs his shoulders and goes in for the kill, making his move! He locks in a....GRECO-ROMAN LIP LOCK!!! WHAT AMAZING TECHNIQUE ON DISPLAY HERE! Luscious appears to be paralyzed by its effects as she can't seem to break the hold! Hotbody applies more pressure causing Luscious to go weak in the knees and slowly collapse to the mat. He must be using some tongue to really crank it in! Luscious's shoulders are down! 1...2...3! HOTBODY RETAINS AFTER ANOTHER HOT AND SWEATY ORDEAL! Luscious looks like she's out of breath. They embrace in a display of incredible sportsmanship but here comes Ozzy Mandias to screw things up!!! Hotbody and Ozzy brawl around in a fury. Hotbody is down and Ozzy goes into the mount but Luscious breaks things up by smashing the tumbler over Ozzy. Hotbody recovers and once again sends Ozzy into the ringpost and takes himself and Luscious out of there. Seems weird to rate a match like this but I think I can call it ***** pretty confidently.

Backstage in the locker room area, The Play Pals are mulling over their recent woes with the Royal Effect. Gavin hopes that all of them can make it into the tag team gauntlet next week. Michael agrees as it would be pretty something to knock them down a peg while at the same time winning the titles one more time. Gavin talks about how it's been quite an adventure since reuniting and that he'd hate for it to go to waste. Unfortunately the Royal Effect seem keen on peeing on everyone's corn flakes here and they bust in for a surprise sneak attack on the Play Pals! McKay adds some choice words after the faces are down by telling them that the mission of the Royal Effect is to flush the waste that is the Play Pals out of the WWE as they take their leave.

Third (?) Match: Brandon Reigns vs. Clubber Harris
Seth Von Kamp watches the proceedings from the back as Reigns reminds everyone of the stakes at Unforgiven. Seth is good at playing the pretender but when the chips are down and when things really matter he'll disappoint as usual. There should be no excuses after Unforgiven because the last man standing will deserve to call themselves the Intercontinental Champion. And after that chapter is closed, Reigns can continue his path to the top as more and more pretenders get put in their pace. Promo aside we've got a pretty awesome match here. I need Reigns to be strong as he goes into his rematch. I also need him to be a savage douche and thus the Money in the Bank briefcase comes into play and Harris gets sent to Never Never Land. Reigns picks up the cheap pin. *****, 95% overall.

Fourth Match: Eddy Clash vs. ???
Galino & Farnes are both out in advance in order to address this scenario that was set up via Clash's contract signing on SmackDown!. Galino wants to point out that even though Eddy Clash requested this match, neither Galino or Farnes will be participating in this sham until the both of them have a chance to look over the joke of a contract that Lisa Benton offered Eddy. There has to be tons of clauses and other legal nonsense that need examining. Plus there's the fact that no other wrestler has ever had this sort of stipulation in their contracts so why should Eddy have one?!? The two of them promise that SERIOUS INQUIRIES will be made into the matter and that they will return with a full report. Until then, Eddy is out of luck!

This of course brings out Eddy Clash himself and he hops into the ring and takes a mic. He points out that even though he gave Luscious the option, Eddy doesn't actually need her to make a decision. Eddy will take his pick for his opponent right now and since Galino is the one annoying him the most, he's nominated. BOOT TO THE FACE OF GALINO! The ref orders Farnes out and calls for the bell!

Fourth Match: Eddy Clash vs. Freddie Galino
Well, here we go, I suppose. Galino just gets manhandled as he evidently wasn't prepared to actually compete. They end up and outside and Farnes has seen enough apparently and attacks Eddy for the DQ. Clash tries to fight both of them off but he's the proverbial babe in the woods and succumbs to the numbers game. Galino & Farnes hit SERIOUS INQUIRIES on the outside and leave Clash laying before taking their leave. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Fifth Match: Chris Collins vs. Kerry Cemenko
Quentin McDaniels joins the announce table offering his insight on Kerry Cemenko. Cemenko's loss at SummerSlam was just another brick removed from the structure holding up his career. He couldn't win the Unified World Title. He couldn't win King of the Ring. This might be the year where Cemenko has to take that long look in the mirror and question whether it's even worth hopping in that plane anymore because McDaniels is just another stroke of bad luck. Anyways, this is another match where they evidently bring their A-game to the table...even though it's just a Raw. Cemenko makes a few gestures towards McDaniels that are apparently so insulting that McDaniels has to run distraction. Cemenko takes his eye off the ball long enough to miss the Curb Stomp and Collins capitalizes by hitting the Fall From Heaven for the pin. McDaniels looks to pick the bones but HERE COMES ALEXANDER PIERO! He gets him some of Collins to even things out and we've got pandemonium! ****1/2, 93% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Kyle Jacobs. Kyle wants to talk about the measure of disappointment in himself that he's feeling right now. Somewhere in the middle of this year things took a turn for the worse for him. It started out promising enough as he had one of the most talked about moments of WrestleMania and managed to become the Intercontinental Champion. Oddly enough, though, the guy that Kyle beat at WrestleMania looks like he's going to be headlining Unforgiven, challenging for the Unified World Title. Meanwhile, Kyle stands here, with no opponent for Unforgiven and no championship. Instead Kyle is stuck on some loop-de-loop with Xavier Cross and quite frankly, he'd like to get off now. Kyle then proceeds to call out Xavier Cross and asks him to get his ass out here.

Cross eventually makes his way out but points out his annoyance with Kyle Jacobs. Cross doesn't answer to someone like Kyle. Kyle should be thanking his lucky stars that people like Xavier Cross exist so that the way is paved for people like Kyle.

Kyle asks if that's one of those lessons like humility that Cross was supposed to teach him. Cross says that there a boat load of lessons that he can teach Kyle. Multiple times if necessary since Kyle apparently can't get over what happened at SummerSlam. The kinds of lessons that Kyle's stupid dad and uncle should have taught. Kyle says that that's great news because he's in the mood for another match against Cross if he's up for it at Unforgiven. Cross claims that he likes the idea but he's going to need something in return if he's going to agree to it in order to make it worth his time and effort. Should Cross manage to pick up the win, AGAIN, Kyle Jacobs must DENOUNCE his heritage and become Cross's personal bitch. Kyle is going to get the proper breaking in that he deserves and he'll either quit in shame or be humbled by the greatest the business has to offer. Kyle ponders this over quietly for a bit but ultimately nods in agreement. We're building an impressive-looking Unforgiven!

Backstage we're joined by Sophie Waters and Shawn Dangerson. They want to take shots at Jason Sorola for what he did in the gauntlet last week. Sorola doesn't have to resort to crap like that because Dangerson is willing and able to take him on properly...IF Sorola has the balls.

Sixth Match: The Dillingers vs. The Tokyo Titans vs. Southern Gentlemen vs. The Academy
The winners here will qualify for the gauntlet for the Unified Tag Team Championship next week on Superstars. Brooke is out there with the Academy but she admits that she's got her mind on other matters because Noah Carmichael is supposed to be here to finally give us all a clear picture about his status for Unforgiven and whether or not he'll be giving Salvatore Scabbia his rightfully-earned title shot. This is one hell of a show between all these teams. It boils down to The Academy and the Dillingers and Justin Mitchell has Joey Dillinger in a pickle. Joey makes the comeback and is able to stay alive. Brooke prepares to hand Justin a foreign object but WAIT A SEC! Noah Carmichael shows up on the Titan Tron as he's apparently just arrived! Brooke is distracted by this as she glares and yells at the screen. Justin boots Joey away and he reaches out for Brooke's help but she's still turned around. Joey tags in Ben and Justin is too busy wondering what is Brooke's malfunction and gets rolled up for the pin. The Dillingers qualify! Afterwards, Justin Mitchell and Randy Ellis express their frustration with Brooke with some telling body language. *****, 94% overall.

FINAL SEGMENT: We're joined by the WWE Unified World Champion Noah Carmichael. He wants to talk about how this hasn't been the reign he envisioned when he was looking to win back the Unified World Title. He should have been out here these last few weeks, kicking ass and being right up in the face of Salvatore Scabbia. It would be easy to blame it on what went down at SummerSlam inside Hell in a Cell but we also have to face the fact that there's a load of bureaucracy that needs to be navigated. Carmichael has had to deal with Lisa Benton's precious little rules and guidelines and blah-blah-blah. Well, Carmichael has some good news for her that will hopefully put her at rest and keep her off his back. Carmichael has in his hand right here, medical clearance from his doctor stating that he will be ready to go at Unforgiven. Sadly, Carmichael will only get that clean bill of health IF he remains inactive in the time being. So it looks like back to sitting on his ass at home? Nah, Carmichael came all the way here to Raw to have a good time and DAMN IT he's going to have himself a good time!

Cue some people who aren't interested in Carmichael having a good time. Namely Brooke and Salvatore Scabbia and they make their way to the ring to confront the champion. Benton immediately sends out the goon squad to get in between the two men but Brooke takes the mic and addresses the situation. "Hey, hey, calm down, there's no need for any of this. We're not out here to be hostile. I mean, this is great news. Salvatore has his guarantee and all that needs to happen to ensure that it remains a guarantee is to make sure no tragedy befalls the great champion, Noah Carmichael. It's an interesting situation to say the least because I can speak for Salvatore when I say that he's been itching to finish what Hell in a Cell started. But if keeping his hands off you for the time being is what needs to be done in order for that goal to come to fruition, then so be it. But it's not good enough. See, this has been a long time coming and I think that Salvatore deserves a little something for his patience and cooperation. While he may be willing to make sure you're good to go for Unforgiven, there are so many other variables that are outside of his control that may put a damper on all of that. So I've taken the liberty to draw up a little something here. You claim that you're eager to compete at Unforgiven, then you need to put your money where your mouth is, quite literally. This document that I'm handing to you is a bit of insurance, Carmichael. We are asking you to put up a $5 million dollar performance bond for your participation in this match. That way you have some extra motivation to remain on the path to full recovery and won't be looking for a way out of this. Put your name on the dotted line, Carmichael, and let's see if you're more than just words. Like I told you before, you're not taking this away from me and you're certainly not taking this from Salvatore Scabbia. He is overdue in regards to that Unified World Title and he is not going to see it slip away just yet. What's it going to be?"

Carmichael takes the contract in his hands and looks it over. "You know, I can't speak for everyone here but I'm getting pretty sick and tired of seeing legal documents and lawyer speak all over this program, you know? Look, I get it. You're miffed. You're anxious. You see that brass ring and it's just out of your reach. You just have to push a little harder. Stretch a little further. Play even dirtier. Be even scummier. Act more pathetic. You really think I want out of this match after what the hell you did to me at SummerSlam? Bitch, I've been counting the seconds to the moment I can do to you what I did to Butch Fleming. You want to talk about what you're owed. What you're owed is what I tell you you're owed. You certainly have my attention and you're welcome to it along with all the trouble it comes with. So I'll sign this piece of paper. I won't have to worry about losing any money because I am showing up at Unforgiven, one way or another. But you, Scabbia, are going to have to worry about facing a Noah Carmichael who isn't bloodied, lying on a stretcher."

"It doesn't really matter. You're going to end up like that anyway." And with that decree Scabbia slaps Carmichael across the face! Carmichael looks to start a fight but the goon squad hold the line and keep the two separated! WE'RE OUT OF TIME!!!

Overall show rating: 85%

This entire thing is just fucking genius. :lol:

El Dandy is always meme worth because he is a high flyer of the highest magnitude. But I'm cracking up even more imagining that WWE may have reached out to a long-retired, 77-year old El Dandy to see if he was available to actually make an appearance in this.

And then Big Show getting his name pulled as well :lol: I'd be expecting him to run out during a Hotbody match at some point only to side with him and make his 753rd career heel turn.

And then that lucky sonofabitch gets to put the Lip Lock on Luscious. Living the dream for sure.

At least Hotbody and Luscious had a much better night than Galino and Farnes. I'm sure the SERIOUS INQUIRIES on Eddy Clash will continue.

Come on, this is the year 2040. 753 is kind of lowballing his heel turns, don't you think?

Mmmmm @ the thought of Luscious working that crank....

Have to finalize who's going to be in the gauntlet. I've got plenty to choose from. Unlike the last one this is going to take up the whole show. Also unlike the last one, there will be an actual decisive winner. I just wish there was a better way of doing gauntlets in the game.

Kelley Hayes evidently didn't show up for a photo shoot. Into the suspension bin you go! You'd never see Jenna Kyle pulling stunts like this. :roll:

Time to bust out a George Carlin quote.

“Bad hair day? What is this shit? When did this become a thing? Put on a hat and go to work you shallow cunt.”

Superstars: September 20, 2040

Opening Match: The Play Pals vs. The Wolves of Wall Street
Winners qualify for the tag team gauntlet next week. The Royal Effect watch the proceedings from the stage with intensity and hatred in their eyes. A hell of an opener as both teams want that position bad. The Play Pals control in the end and look to have things well in hand. McKay and Kavovit aren't having it and try their hands at spoiling things for the faces. Miscommunication ensues and the attempted interference backfires, leaving Emilio London open to the Achievement Unlocked leading to the Play Pals picking up the win and qualifying. More threats are exchanged between the two rival teams. *****, 85% overall.

I think I'm dealing with a DUD show.

Second Match: Leah vs. Phoebe Hanson
Nathan Quinn is with Leah, of course, as he wants to bring up the future of the women's tag team division. Regardless of the outcome of the match between the Lonely Girls and Eclypse and Naomi at Unforgiven, he wants Leah and Bonnie Beckham to be front and center for the next opportunity at the gold. Hannah McCormick could have been part of this revolution and Jenna Kyle also could have been basking in his guidance but they chose to be selfish. Now it's going to come crashing down around them. More kick ass stuff from the ladies as Leah is making some strides in the ring to being a top name in the division. Quinn works his magic by distracting Phoebe and Leah floors her leading to the Sultry Splash for the pin and the victory. ****1/2, 81% overall.

Yup, it's a DUD show.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He wants to talk about the incredible ordeal he went through on Raw in regards to the defense of his Cruiserweight Championship. It was a wild roller coaster of emotions! There was uncertainty and then excitement over the possibility of facing a legend like El Dandy and then disappointment in the cowardice of said legend when he refused to show up and then confusion over the Big Show and then finally the thrill of victory! It had to have been one of the hottest and sweatiest encounters he's had with Luscious; and believe him, they've had some pretty hot and sweaty encounters. The shower afterwards was such a huge benefit. But that's in the past. We've settled the issue of me defending my Cruiserweight Title so now we don't need to worry about it for a good while. It was a tough break for guys like Shawn Dangerson and Ozzy Mandias who were looking to get that shot but it was A COMPLETELY RANDOM DRAWING! It was out of the hands of Michael Hotbody so there was nothing nobody could have done so there shouldn't be any crying or complaining. Those are just the cards you get dealt sometimes. Now seeing as there is no need to continue fretting over this issue, it's time to move on to other major issues. Namely, next week's gauntlet for the WWE Unified Tag Team Titles. Now you can't have a contest like this without featuring THE premier tag team of the WWE, the best legal counsel money can buy, Galino & Farnes. Well, tonight, they are going to take care of two birds with one huge stone. Galino & Farnes will be facing that duo of no-good troublemakers, Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle! So not only will they completely obliterate that shady alliance but Galino & Farnes will move on to next week and capture those tag team titles, which they rightfully deserve! This will be a case study for anyone on the roster, veteran or rookie, that trying to get involved in the business of Michael Hotbody is a bad idea. Jordan, Martyn, and even Ozzy Mandias on Raw are all going to find out the hard way you can't just take out your frustrations over your failures on poor, innocent people like Michael Hotbody!

Cue Ozzy Mandias himself as he's looking to take out his frustrations on Michael Hotbody. Hotbody looks ready to fight but he must have got an alert from his DoorDash because he decides to bolt and head to the back. Ozzy promises to get Hotbody in the ring one way or another.

Third Match: Mathias vs. Ziggy Styles
Paul Andrews accompanies his man, Mathias, and is accosted by our crack journalist team as he's questioned over what major thing he's been cooking up. Andrews assures everyone that time will reveal all but that the answer is closer than anyone might be thinking. Ziggy goes on the record that he doesn't care who Andrews has up his sleeve because it's probably some other stick in the mud who doesn't want to get Ziggy with it and there's no place for people like that in the WWE. Crowd isn't as into this as the other matches but I think we can blame the DUD show for that nonsense. Andrews must be doing some fine coaching as Mathias continues to impress and shows how willing he is not get Ziggy with it. Ziggy suffers another humiliation the second week in a row as he falls victim to the Goliath Gore and Mathias picks up the win. ****1/2, 79% overall. Whoever Paul Andrews is looking to bring in has got quite the manager to say the least.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Wrakk. Wrakk wants to discuss the sheer lack of a spine in Haven. Allegedly, Haven was completely devastated at SummerSlam that he hasn't been able to compete these last few weeks but that clearly didn't stop him from ruining things for Wrakk last week in that battle royal. And where is Haven now? Is he here in front of all of us, ready to take his judgment and punishment like a man? No. He's scurried back into the shadows like the cockroach he is because he knows Wrakk can squash him at anytime. That battle royal was Wrakk's to win and nobody can contest that!

Cue Ryan Pattillo who looks like he wants to contest that. Ryan tells Wrakk that he gets the need to want to get back on top of that mountain. After all, Wrakk had to suffer through one, whole year of watching other people fighting over that Unified World Title that used to be his. Problem is, you have to watch the people you step on along the way. Pattillo is one of them. Pattillo didn't appreciate the tantrum Wrakk had that caused him to get tossed out of the match and he also didn't appreciate being called a surrogate for Haven. Ryan Pattillo stands here telling Wrakk that there are people on the roster not so easily squashed. In fact, as long as Haven isn't showing his face and as long as Wrakk wants to be on a tirade, how about Wrakk vs. Pattillo at Unforgiven. Pattillo can be a surrogate for Haven again, when he breaks Wrakk's ass just like at SummerSlam.

Wrakk is amused at this show of defiance. It's a kitten bearing its fangs playing at being a tiger. Pattillo wants a match? Accepted. It'll be even more of a reason for Haven to keep hiding his sorry ass.

Fourth Match: The British Infection vs. The Young Bloods
Winners will also qualify for the tag team gauntlet next week. Both Fantasee and Stephen Q. Sterling are out here with their respective clients. Some good shit here as we strive to fight off the effects of the DUD show. Sterling tries his hand at getting involved to get his guys out of a jam but Fantasee takes care of that by pantsing him. HILARITY ENSUES! Matt Riley falls victim to the Queen's English and the Brits get the win. *****, 86% overall.

More In-Ring Super Special Talky Time, this time with the WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey. She wants to get a few things off of her chest as she heads into Unforgiven's match for the WWE Women's Tag Team Titles alongside Eclypse. History may have been denied at SummerSlam but it can't be the defining moment of the year for her. After all, she is still the WWE Women's Champion and the year has been mainly good to her. She won the Queen of the Ring. She took Sonya Braddock to the limit at WrestleMania and then finished the job at Night of Champions to claim the championship. She beat out 3 other Queens of the Ring, two of whom are the current Women's Tag Team Champions, to be THE undisputed Queen of Queens. But all of that is minor compared to being able to call Eclypse, her loving cousin, her partner. Things have been rough between the two for the past few weeks but that needs to come to an end. So with that said, Naomi calls out Eclypse so that the two of them can clear the air and hopefully get on track, both as a family and as a team.

We have to wait a while but eventually Eclypse makes her way out and joins Naomi in the ring. Naomi continues with her address: "Eclypse, I knew that it was going to be a gamble when I asked you to be my partner for the opportunity to become the tag team champions. But it was a gamble worth taking. We came so close to history. We had more attention on us than we knew what do with. And we were able to bond as blood. But all of that is at risk right now. Now, there have been some mishaps that I've blamed you for but with everything that is at stake right I feel like I need to swallow my pride and be the bigger person and take some responsibility, too. The important thing is us sticking together because right now, Faith and Jenna are laughing at us. They had their big moment in the sun at SummerSlam and they've been doing nothing but parading around, rubbing it in our faces like we're some joke. I don't know about you, but I'm sure as hell no joke. I'm the WWE Women's Champion and I have one of the toughest, meanest, ass-kicking bitch as my cousin and as my partner...that is, if you want to be that."

Eclypse ponders this over for a bit before giving her response. "I'm not sure how I feel about you coming at this as if I'm the poor babe in the woods. You're in territory I've already charted. I'm well aware of our plight. It's certainly a dilemma but in all fairness I did want this rematch. As long as you can assure me that this is for the best and that you can be counted on, I'm on board. But know this, cousin or not, my understanding has its limits. I'm not going to tolerate another failure so you've got me 120% focused on knocking Jenna and Faith off the mountain. I need you to do the same."

"I'm way ahead of you. Let's give them hell." And with that it looks like the two women have hashed things out and they shake. Their alliance appears to have been reforged.

Fifth Match: Orlando Kincaid vs. Shawn Dangerson
Dangerson can absolutely hang with the big boys evidently as he's still angling for a shot at the Cruiserweight Title as well as showing off to Jason Sorola. It's a nice little 'big man vs. little man' affair. Dangerson makes the comeback but here comes Sorola to harass Sophie Waters. He chases her for a bit until Dangerson catches wind of the situation and runs out to put an end to Sorola's lack of chivalry. Unfortunately, Sorola keeps Dangerson's attention long enough to cause a countout. Dangerson looks back to the ring in frustration and that's the opening Sorola needs to sucker punch Dangerson and put a beating on him. *****, 84% overall.

Backstage we're joined by Brooke and Salvatore Scabbia. Brooke talks about how great it is that Scabbia can finally be called the number one contender to the Unified World Title. It can only be topped by the feeling of him being able to be called the Unified World Champion. The gears are finally in motion and there is no stopping them. That note that Noah Carmichael's doctor gave him was really a countdown and every day that passes is just more and more seconds being removed until finally Carmichael comes crashing into the reality that Salvatore Scabbia is just plain better than he is. It's going to be hell waiting for that day to come but it's nothing compared to what Carmichael is going to experience at Unforgiven.

Sixth Match: Xavier Cross vs. Daniel St. Croix
Xavier Cross gets on the mic and clarifies the stipulations that he demanded for his rematch against Kyle Jacobs at Unforgiven. Should Jacobs lose, and he will, he needs to become Xavier's personal bitch who will be at Xavier's side at his beck and call. He needs to learn respect and being at the side of the great Xavier Cross will do nothing but wonders for him. He may even enjoy it and actually end up a better wrestler for it. And if nothing else, seeing someone like Kyle Jacobs being humbled will be a warning to any other wet behind the ears punk looking to step up to Cross. Just a solid match to put Cross over. He hits the Cross Cutter to pick up the pin as he BUILDS MOMENTUM towards Unforgiven. *****, 85% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Galino & Farnes vs. Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle
So Galino & Farnes are looking to get into the gauntlet next week. Zed Jones is with them on the outside. For moral support, obviously. They talk about how this has been a long time coming as neither Demiras or LaSalle want to listen to reason or any sort of legal threats. Galino & Farnes are far more deserving of championship gold than either of these two failures who already had their opportunities AND BLEW IT! So this is a pretty heated affair, obviously, as the faces walk the line of wanting revenge and wanting victory. It breaks down as Luscious runs interference distracting the ref and Zed quite literally brings the hammer down on Demiras with the GAVEL OF DOOM! Galino & Farnes proceed to nail SERIOUS INQUIRIES!!! to pick up the cheap pin. It looks like we're getting a three-on-one affair afterwards BUT HERE COMES EDDY CLASH!!! He gets him some of Galino & Farnes as Demiras and LaSalle regroup. Clash and Zed proceed to have a staredown but Luscious pulls Zed and the rest of her crew back as apparently she's getting some DoorDash alerts, too. We end with a 3-on-3 staredown. ****1/2, 81% overall.

Overall show rating: 83%

So I guess Unforgiven looks like this so far:

WWE Unified World Title: Noah Carmichael (c) vs. Salvatore Scabbia

WWE Intercontinental Title - Last Man Standing: Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Brandon Reigns

WWE Women's Tag Team Titles: The Lonely Girls (c) vs. Eclypse and WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey

Xavier Cross vs. Kyle Jacobs

Ryan Pattillo vs. Wrakk

I have the rest of the card good to go but I just have to "book them" on television. One of them hinges on the outcome of the tag team gauntlet.

A WWE universe with a nice, logical build to everything? What is this nonsense? Where is 74 year old Goldberg's title match? Where is the reminding of everybody that the Attitude Era was the most important?

Cleary the hot and sweaty encounters between Hotbody and Luscious is because they take Jazzercise classes together.

I still automatically picture Ziggy Styles as Dolph Ziggler wearing AJ Styles' gear, like the type of thing you'd find in a small local indy promotion somewhere :lol: for those reasons alone him getting rocked in some of these matches feels very on point. That'll teach you to get suspended!

The tag matches getting ***** is par for the course but props to Kincaid/Dangerson and Cross/St. Croix for putting on full monty singles matches in front of a clearly unappreciative crowd!

I'm glad Galino & Farnes made were able to make their SERIOUS INQUIRIES on the unjust claims LaSalle and Demiras have for another title match. And a Clash vs. Zed hoss fight or trios match sound like a good time too.

Dud show after the return? EWR was clearly penalizing you for playing other games.

EWR: You cheated on me. :nono:
M-A-G: WE WERE ON A BREAK! :rant:

When I was booking back in the day and I still had Goldberg on the roster in the year 2025 I didn't realize how prophetic I was being. I'm glad I stepped away from the wrestling world because I think that added with the rest of the nonsense going on the world would have inspired me to take up drinking.

No doubt they do Jazzercise together, followed up with a nice dinner of some spicy Kung Pao chicken. Getting all hot and sweaty is good for the body and it shows.

I'm obviously not going to hold a grudge against Ziggy forever because I think I can make something out of him with his goofy nature. He's got great charisma and solid stats. I'm wondering if I can make him a credible challenger to Seth's Intercontinental Title down the road...not to spoil the results of Unforgiven or anything.

Here's the thing with 5-star matches, though. Wouldn't the crowd reaction and incorporating the proper response to said crowd reaction make it a 5-star match? Like, is Flair-Steamboat going to get that rating if everyone was just sitting on their hands and neither guy knows what to do to handle it? Again, going back to the empty arena thing, how do you really know if a guy is good if there isn't any feedback? Things that make you go "Hmmm..."

Galino & Farnes have paid off in spades, asking the tough questions no one wants to ask and shielding poor Michael Hotbody from the cruelty of people like Jordan and Demiras! Zed and Clash will be fun but for the PPV I'm planning on a 4-on-4 encounter and save them for down the road. Clearly Galino & Farnes have MORE INQUIRIES to get around to before Clash has the privilege of getting into the ring with Zed. I mean, is his contract even legal? Is HE getting favors from Lisa Benton in exchange for sexual activities? And what does Big Thunder even mean? SERIOUS INQUIRIES are in order!

You say this but now I'm worried about what SmackDown! is going to end up with.

SmackDown!: September 21, 2040

We open with the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Future Foundation along with Vivian Merrick. Vivian takes a mic and exposits on the current situation regarding the tag team titles. "In six short days, Lisa Benton will be putting into action a ploy designed to ruin eight months of hard work and dominance. The Future Foundation, my man Rick Hilton and my family Julian Merrick, have been on an absolute tear. They are currently the longest reigning champions on the roster. Who else can even come close? Not Seth Von Kamp, who pulled a miracle from somewhere even deeper than his ass to win the Intercontinental Title a few weeks ago at SummerSlam. Not those two riff-raffs who lucked their way into the new Women's Tag Team Titles. And certainly not even the Unified World Champion himself, Noah Carmichael, who just happens to be sitting right over here at ringside in the crowd." Vivian gestures to the front row of the audience and the camera does indeed confirm Carmichael's presence there. He's evidently just here as a fan. "Shame that you're pretty much benched until Unforgiven, Carmichael, but it seems like you're making the best out of a raw deal. Well we're going to do the same. The Future Foundation isn't going to run from this challenge. You can line up every team on the roster and my boys can outshine and outclass them any day of the week. Our only demand is that when it's all said and done and you hear the Future Foundation announced as STILL the Unified Tag Team Champions, we don't want to hear any complaining, any moaning, any bellyaching whatsoever because we will have EARNED the right to call ourselves the greatest team in the WWE!"

Cue The Wyldhearts, Blaine Bellamey and Robbie Greer, coming out to the stage to offer their take on this matter. Blaine takes the mic and addresses Vivian: "Well I'd say that's counting your chickens before they even hatch. I mean, all of the spots in the gauntlet still haven't been filled. So Robbie and I got to thinking that since you claim you can outshine and outclass and outlast and outback and outwhatever anybody, how about you prove it by facing us tonight and if we can win, we get to take part in the gauntlet?"

"Woah, woah, woah, let's not get too demanding here. I'll meet you halfway, Blaine. There's no need for both of my boys to exert themselves but we are keen on teaching you a lesson. So how about one of you face one of the champions and we'll see if you can stumble your way into that gauntlet?"

"That sounds just fine. We'll see you out here later." And thus we've got ourselves some more drama for the gauntlet!

First Match: The Wasteland vs. The Millennium Rebels
Winners qualify for the tag team gauntlet. Duke sticks out like a sore thumb here as he's the only non-cruiserweight of the bunch. That proves to be the X-Factor as not even Aaron Ramsey can work his magic to help his guys as Duke goes wild off the hot tag. One Toxic Kiss later from The Wasteland on Dangerson and the faces get the pin and thus qualify for next week's big chase for the tag team titles. *****, 94% overall.

Backstage, to continue tonight's theme apparently, we get to hear from the WWE Women's Tag Team Champions, the Lonely Girls. They're asked about all of the criticism leveled towards them since becoming the champions, even from someone like Vivian Merrick earlier and of course from their opponents at Unforgiven, Eclypse and Naomi Bailey. Jenna talks first and addresses Vivian's comments. "Vivian has it easy because she doesn't really have to accomplish anything for herself. All she has to do is keep riding that gravy train that she calls the Future Foundation. 8 months of basically standing around and all of a sudden she feels like she can stand there in the middle of that ring tonight and throw shade around? The last eight months for Faith and myself have been some of the toughest that we've ever had to go through. We overcame such tremendous animosity between each other and climbed that mountain at SummerSlame and earned the spot we have right now." Faith continues adding her take: "The criticisms being tossed around are the same I've had to deal with since I hopped onto the scene. Look at what it's done for the people spewing it out. They've had to look at Jenna and me become the top names in this division. Anything that I've even been allowed to compete in, I've wanted to be the best. I did that with parkour. I did that with the women's division. Oh, there's a tag team title for the women? Damn right I'm going to want to win that. Eclypse and Naomi Bailey can cry and complain and stumble over each other and point fingers all they want. They need to get their crap together because a repeat of SummerSlam is what's at stake and I don't know what will be more embarrassing for them: them losing when they're not on the same page...or losing when they are on the same page."

Second Match: The Agents of Change vs. Caleb Greene and Stanley Coleman
Winners qualify for the tag team gaunlet. Aphrodite is with Greene and Coleman. I still haven't come up with a name for them. WTF is wrong with me? Anyway, this is some more good shit even though I haven't officially put Greene and Coleman together as a team. They might benefit from acquiring those sweet team experience points. Things go sideways when everyone ends up outside. Clayton North harasses Aphrodite and Caleb loses his shit as he jumps on North. We eventually end up with a double countout. I guess no one is going to the gauntlet from this contest? ****1/2, 92% overall.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He's out here because wants to interview a very special guest in Ozzy Mandias. He has a lot of questions for Ozzy, namely why can't he just leave Hotbody the hell alone?!? Hotbody has done nothing wrong to Ozzy! The only crime you can claim Hotbody has ever committed is just being too damn good! Hotbody is just a simple conga dancer from Georgia who wants to be the best Cruiserweight champion the wrestling world has ever seen! But Hotbody can't do that unless he's facing the very best competition. Hotbody is begging for a worthy contender! It's just not Ozzy Mandias, at least not right now. Hell, Hotbody is even willing to give El Dandy a second chance to challenge for the title! Hotbody is available at Unforgiven and the door is wide open for that little scamp to come on down so he and Hotbody can finally settle things between them! Ozzy Mandias? Well he's more than welcome to sit back and watch or he can work a little bit harder at grabbing that brass ring. Michael Hotbody believes in Ozzy Mandias and he's welcome to strut on down here so he can hear it face-to-face!

Cue Ozzy Mandias making his way down to the ring. He stops mid-way and doesn't enter, however, and Hotbody is a bit confused. "Come on, Ozzy. It's all good here on the Hot Button. There are no rivalries or emnity here. You're welcome to come in here and speak your peace."

"Nah, I think I'm good here."

"OK, OK, fine; I get it. You're still a bit cranky over not being able to cut that mustard. You need some space. I understand perfectly. Sometimes Luscious and I need some space for a bit...then five minutes later the Hotbody is all warmed up again and ready to go!"

"Dear God, SHUT UP! You are an embarrassment to the Cruiserweight Title. You're an embarrassment to the WWE. You're an embarrassment to professional wrestling. I've seen you grovel in that ring more than I've seen you actually fight. You think being a champion is some sort of joke but yet you feel entitled to being one. You hide behind your goon and your lawyers and your woman because you know that you don't have the balls to take someone like me on."

"Oh, you want to bring that kind of stuff up, huh? You know, maybe this interview really was a bad idea after all. Maybe I shouldn't have bothered trying to relate to a Neandrathal like you. In fact, I should have been busy trying to get you knocked all the way to end of the line as far as getting a title shot goes. Maybe a certain group of people need to make some SERIOUS INQUIRIES into you!"

Hotbody lowers his mic and grins his stupid face off. It disappears after a while as Ozzy doesn't respond and merely smirks back at the champion. Hotbody raises the mic and speaks again: "Yes, a CERTAIN GROUP OF PEOPLE need to make some SERIOUS INQUIRIES INTO YOU!" Hotbody looks back up the ramp past Ozzy with a concerned look on his face. Ozzy breaks the awkwardness by speaking: "Oh, I'm sorry, Michael. Were you expecting someone?"

With that Ozzy looks back to the big screen and soon it displays a live shot backstage of a brawl between Galino & Farnes and Zed Jones and Jordan Demiras, Martyn LaSalle, and Eddy Clash!!! Officials eventually enter the scene and begin separating the six men. Cut back to the arena and Ozzy looks at Hotbody like he's a piece of meat. Hotbody is wide-eyed with terror and begins backing up BUT HERE COMES LISA BENTON!

"Wait a sec, wait a sec, Ozzy. I know you're dying to get a piece of Michael but I'm dealing with enough chaos backstage as it is. And to Michael's point, you kind of need to earn a shot at the Cruiserweight Title. So I'm going to make a bit of a compromise. At Unforgiven, Ozzy, you will lead a team composed of yourself, Eddy Clash, Jordan Demiras, and Martyn LaSalle against Michael Hotbody's team of Zed Jones and Galino & Farnes. And should you win, Ozzy, you will get your match against Michael Hotbody for the Cruiserweight Title!" Hotbody throws a fit as Ozzy continues his smirking ways and we end this segment.

Third Match: Hannah McCormick vs. Lzzy Ryd
Hannah hits the mic and wants to rap on the comments made by Nathan Quinn. She apologizes for using the word 'rap' because unlike these West Coast lowlifes in this crowd, she's aware that RAP SUCKS! Just like the rock princess over here and her music of choice but Hannah will deal with her in a bit. Hannah and Bobbi Jo have been doing just fine without Nathan Quinn. He can have his dumb Barbie dolls who are willing to be his little playthings because Hannah and Bobbi Jo are making their way to the top where they can challenge the Women's Tag Team Champions! Some awesome shit here as these two work awesome together. Bobbi Jo gets the attention of Tania as she tries her hand at helping out Hannah. A chase ensues but Bobbi is able to sneak Hannah's custom mic into the ring and Hannah uses it for nefarious purposes on Lzzy's head leading to her getting the cheap win. *****, 95% overall.

Backstage we're joined by the Royal Effect. The two of them are beyond sick and tired of the Play Pals. The fact that they are going to be able to challenge for the tag team titles next week is just the icing on the crap cake. Well, Moses McKay has a proposal that will throw a wrench into that little idea. See, McKay has Michael Haywood right now and McKay proposes that should he come out victorious, the Royal Effect ALSO get to participate in the gauntlet. He'll see Haywood out there for his answer...and it had better be the right one.

Fourth Match: Moses McKay vs. Michael Haywood
Neither man's respective partners is with them out here. Haywood makes it clear that he accepts the proposal put forward by McKay. McKay continues to demonstrate his hatred of the Play Pals as he's all kinds of aggressive here. These two teams are just magic together. It all comes to an end when McKay uses the ol' "counter the victory roll into a pinfall using the top rope" trick. McKay bails as he celebrates the fact that he's helped get his team into the gauntlet. *****, 99% overall. I honestly don't know what more I can do to get a perfect 100% in regards to this feud. Maybe the blowoff will be the thing that finally pushes it up to that level.

Fifth Match: Blaine Bellamey vs. Rick Hilton
Blaine has to pick up the win here if he and Robbie Greer want to be part of the gauntlet. The theme of managers not having things together continues here as after an awesome outing, Vivian tries to get involved but Blaine sends Rick into his girl knocking her off the apron. Hilton falls prey to a backslide and Blaine gets the pin sending the Wyldhearts into the gauntlet. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Sixth Match: Alexander Piero, Kerry Cemenko, Kyle Jacobs vs. Chris Collins, Quentin McDaniels, Xavier Cross
The heels each take turns griping about their respective rivals here in this match. Collins tells Alexander Piero to just get over what happened to Madison. Collins brutalized his own father for the sake of getting ahead in this business so some floozy shouldn't be bogging Piero down! Quentin is ready for Cemenko anytime he wants to repeat SummerSlam. Cross tells Jacobs that he's been staying up at night pondering the glorious ways he's going to make Jacobs' life suck after Unforgiven. I probably should have done this as this main event but I've got other plans for that bit. Cross gets the duke here after catching Cemenko in mid-Curb Stomp and tosses him into the turnbuckle which is suspiciously missing its pad and gets a schoolboy pin. *****, 94% overall.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp vs. Ronnie Costello
Brooke and The Academy accompany Ronnie and Brooke wants to riff on Noah Carmichael who has been sitting in the front row enjoying the show. She questions his intelligence in showing up instead of playing things safe and staying at home. His reputation, his cash, and his title are at stake so he needs to be thinking smart. Of course, the ultimate smart thing would be to just relinquish the Unified World Title to Salvatore Scabbia and save himself the pain. Brooke doesn't intend on stopping there, either. In fact, Ronnie Costello could one day be the one holding that Intercontinental Championship because Brooke is a manager of winners and champions. The Academy kind of give her the side eye with that last statement but the match progresses nonetheless. This could be a nice rivalry down the line as we've got some good chemistry here. Of course Brandon Reigns has to ruin things as Seth and Ronnie are fighting on the outside. Reigns clips Seth from behind for the DQ as Ronnie is all up in the face of Noah Carmichael. Ronnie dumps Carmichael's beer all over the champion and Carmichael shoves him away. Ronnie responds with a slap and Brooke tries calling him off, no doubt trying to protect the match at Unforgiven. The Academy don't seem to be on the same page and they pull Carmichael over the railing and deliver some boots before sending him into the steps. Brooke freaks the fuck out and tries calling them off as she yells at them in disbelief, asking them if they realize what they've done. Seth and Brandon take their little brawl into the crowd as it's just pandemonium as we go off the air. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Overall show rating: 91%

Is it bad that when I think of The Wasteland I automatically picture shitty WWE team The Ascension? Probably because their finisher was actually called Wasteland IIRC. I don’t really know what more those guys ever could’ve done aside from being Rocksteady and Bebop-style henchmen for someone.

LOL a countout preventing anyone from going to the gauntlet. That’s a new one. I know if someone had caused a DQ the usual result is “oh yeah, you don’t want either man winning this #1 contenders match? Fine, you face both!” but that’s a different situation.

That 8-man tag is gonna be off the chain. The walls are closing in on Hotbody from all sides and I hope whatever event he finally drops the belt at is outdoors, because I think it’s gonna blow the roof off the fucking building.

Yeah hopefully the Haywood/McKay angle can get the 100% payoff but sometimes EWR makes it essentially impossible to ever get that last step. Wish they could’ve had a once in a million occurrence of getting a 6 star match.

https://i.imgur.com/rALgqvT.png

Wasn't she, like, your first God damn match when you debuted? And it impressed me to the point where I decided to push your ass? :wtf:

Raw: September 24, 2040
Opening Match: The Wasteland and The Wyldhearts vs. Galino & Farnes and the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Future Foundation
A bit of a preview ahead of this Thursday's gauntlet for the WWE Unified Tag Team Championship. Both Luscious and Vivian Merrick want to brag about the superiority of their respective clients. Luscious claims that Galino & Farnes capturing the championship this Thursday is the final piece of the puzzle that will solidify them as the premier team in the WWE. They're already the greatest legal minds and their efforts in securing a fair and just treatment of Michael Hotbody deserve one hell of a reward! Vivian counters that it's not going to be a legal debate this Thursday. Every team that's going to be participating is going to find out whether or not they're up to snuff. The future belongs to only one team and there's a reason Rick Hilton and Julian Merrick have the name that they do. It's earned and nobody is going to take that away from them! Well with that out of the way we've got a pretty hot opener here, as you'd expect. Luscious and Vivian try to one-up each other with their assistance that ultimately leads to Luscious sneaking in a low blow on Duke and that allows Galino & Farnes to nail SERIOUS INQUIRIES!!! on him to score the pin. Vivian and the Future Foundation don't seem to know how to handle that as their confidence seems to have been shaken up. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Backstage, we meet up with Ryan Pattillo ahead of his encounter with Wrakk at Unforgiven. He wants to point out that it's a completely different WWE now from when Wrakk took his year-long hiatus. Wrakk's desire to walk back onto the scene like he owns the place is a tad misguided because the scene doesn't belong to him anymore. There are a hell of a lot more guys with the balls to not get pushed around by a guy like Wrakk, and Pattillo is one of them. Now, that may be a lot coming from a guy who also hasn't been the top dog in a while but Pattillo finds this fight one worth having one the way back to that position at the top of the pack. Naturally this leads to Wrakk coming up from behind Pattillo in mid-interview and thus commences a pretty swank beatdown. Wrakk stands over Pattillo and warns him to watch his mouth because it's going to determine how severe things are going to get at Unforgiven. Wrakk has high hopes that Pattillo will be smarter than Haven and learn to take what's coming to him to heart.

Elsewhere backstage, Aphrodite runs into Vivian Merrick. Aphrodite commends Vivian on the events that occurred earlier in the opening match but she's skeptical that the Future Foundation can pull it off this Thursday. Vivian proclaims that Aphrodite's opinion means nothing because she doesn't even have a team in the competition. Even if that were the case, Julian and Rick are prepped and ready to shove everyone's words down their throats and to show Lisa Benton that the Future Foundation deserve all the respect in the world. Really, Lisa Benton should just call the whole thing off in order to safe face and not be humiliated in front of everyone. Lisa Benton just happens to be within earshot and enters the conversation. Lisa points out that not all of the spots have been filled for the gauntlet so there's still plenty of room for more competition. In fact, there's a Last Chance Fatal Four-Way later on in the night where one lucky team can sneak in via the last minute. Vivian slams Lisa for being a power mad dictator but it's all OK. When the Future Foundation are standing tall at the end of the night still with those belts in hand, it'll be the biggest embarrassment of Lisa's entire tenure. Lisa smirks and addresses Aphrodite. Lisa says that it was kind of a letdown that her boys' match against the Agents of Change last week spoiled everyone's chances of being in the gauntlet. Technically none of them really lost. So Lisa tells Aphrodite to go tell Caleb Greene and Stanley Coleman that they're in the gauntlet now...and the Agents of Change. Lisa turns to an upset Vivian and tells her to enjoy Thursday.

Second Match: WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey vs. Missy Brantley
Eclypse is with Naomi and they both want to discuss their reforged unity. Petty little squabbling was getting in the way of what is really important and that is the fact that the Lonely Girls are just a bunch of pretenders living on borrowed time. They're not going to be facing the same Naomi and Eclypse this Sunday because now there is new focus, new purpose, and new appreciation for one another. If SummerSlam was one of the greatest nights for Jenna and Kyle, then Unforgiven will be one of the worst when their 15 minutes of fame as the tag team champions ends in a puff of smoke. Their historic victory is going to be eclipsed by the historic run that Eclypse and Naomi are going to have and by the impact Unforgiven is going to leave on them. With that out of the way it's time for a fucking sweet match. This is all for the benefit of Naomi as we BUILD MOMENTUM going into this Sunday. It's a hard-fought battle coming from Missy's side but it's not to be this night. Naomi hits the Bail Out and gets the pin. *****, 95% overall.

Third Match: The Perfections vs. The Jersey Experience
Here you go, Leah. I hope this shuts you up. Nathan Quinn continues to be amused at other teams in the women's division talking their nonsense about their intentions for the tag team titles. Nathan has the team that will lead the division into the future no matter what anyone else wants to claim. Once again the ladies deliver the goods and once again Nathan plays insurance policy, distracting Frankie long enough for Leah to attack from behind and hit the Sultry Splash for the pin. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Backstage, Ozzy Mandias is with Eddy Clash. Ozzy is looking forward to this Sunday as it's a chance to once again get in the ring with that joke of a champion, Michael Hotbody. However, he is a tad nervous. Hotbody's crew is tight and they've worked together a lot. Ozzy is faced with the task of leading a team that he's never teamed with. Tonight is going to help fix some of that. Eddy and Ozzy have a match tonight that's going to help work things out. Eddy believes that it's all good as long as he has the opportunity to smack around all of Hotbody's goons. Ozzy asks for one step at a time. Smacking them all around is fine and dandy but there's a shot at the Cruiserweight Title at stake. Ozzy doesn't just want personal gratification of punching in Hotbody's teeth; he wants victory, too, and he wants that title.

Fourth Match: Tag Team Gauntlet Last Chance Fatal Four-Way
This is elimination rules. Four teams have one representative here where the last man standing earns his team a spot in the gauntlet this Superstars. We've got Wu representing The Tokyo Titans, Sully Lane representing The Young Bloods, Johnny Dangerson representing The Millennium Rebels, and Randy Ellis representing The Academy. Brooke and Salvatore Scabbia are with Randy and they take the mic. They're pretty dismissive of this match and just want to rip into Randy and Justin Mitchell for what happened on SmackDown!. Apparently the word is Noah Carmichael is in bad shape and his appearance at Unforgiven is in jeopardy. Brooke asks Randy and Justin what the hell they were thinking? Randy fires back at Brooke by accusing her of neglecting everyone else besides Scabbia. She's supposed to be looking out for everyone under her watch. In fact, him being in this match right now wouldn't have even been necessary if she hadn't been so obsessed with Carmichael last week. Scabbia demands that Randy watch himself because the Academy should be grateful that they're even tolerated. In fact, if they weren't clients of Brooke, Scabbia would be getting his pound of flesh from them right now. He's been waiting for this championship opportunity for too long for ANYONE to be ruining it. If Carmichael doesn't make it to Unforgiven, it's on The Academy's heads. Brooke tells Scabbia to calm things down a bit. After all, the Academy has a chance here to go on to win the Tag Team Titles. She is a manager of champions so she's not so quick to cast them aside...just yet. Let's see how well they do. Well with all of that drama out of the way, the match commences with it's yummy goodness. It comes down to Ellis and Johnny Dangerson as the final two. Randy looks a bit rocked and Brooke looks like she wants to offer some aid but Scabbia holds her back. Randy notices this and looks understandly peeved. Dangerson tries a sneak attack but Randy proves his resolve by avoiding it and nailing Today's Lesson for the pin and to send he and Justin Mitchell to the gauntlet this Thursday. Things look heated amongst Brooke's crew BUT HERE COMES NOAH CARMICHAEL!!! He tries to get him some of Scabbia despite his apparent bad state of health. Randy Ellis looks on, looking unsure of what to do. Ronnie Costello and Justin Mitchell come down to try to help Scabbia but Randy stops Justin from interfering. Meanwhile Lisa Benton's army of offcials run down to separate everyone for all the good it does as it looks like Carmichael has given his receipt. He's ultimately taken to the back as control looks to be established. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Backstage, Lisa Benton catches up with Noah Carmichael who is still in a mood. Lisa is irate at what just went down. There's no way Carmichael is going to be medically cleared for Unforgiven after these last few days and that's more headaches that she has to deal with now. Carmichael dismisses Lisa's take as he points out he's been going through far worse. Lisa should be able to relate because she knows deep down in her heart, if this were happening to her when she was still a competitor she wouldn't have backed down and she would've fought through the B.S., too, and she wouldn't have been listening to anyone telling her otherwise. Lisa counters that she's not a competitor anymore and she has a whole new set of responsibilities. It's not her own well-being she needs to be looking out for; it's every wrestler under her watch and it's the health of the company, too. Carmichael throws up his hands and declares that they're at an empass then, because he has no intentions of skipping out at Unforgiven. He gave his money and his word so Lisa is going to have to figure this out. Lisa pauses and lowers her head in contemplation. She finally looks back up at Noah and tells him that he can have his piece of Scabbia at Unforgiven...but she will NOT be sanctioning the match. Whatever happens on Sunday is on him.

Fifth Match: Ozzy Mandias and Eddy Clash vs. The Sin City Rollers
So we've got this match to hopefully get Ozzy and Eddy to gel as a unit before that big 8-man on Sunday. The Sin City Rollers are a pretty well-established team so they've got their work cut out for them. Hampering things even further is the presence of Zed Jones and The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody at ringside. The match goes on with those two clouds hanging over the heads of the faces but Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle ultimately make their way out on the ramp to keep a watch on Hotbody and Jones. This leads to Eddy and Ozzy being able to focus their efforts on the match at hand and things come to a head with Luis Ortega falling victim to Eddy's Thunderstrike and that's a pinfall win for the faces. Hotbody and Zed are sandwiched in between the two pairs of their adversaries. Zed wants a piece of Eddy but Hotbody orders the retreat by piggybacking on Zed and demanding they escape through the crowd. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Sixth Match: Alexander Piero vs. Ziggy Styles
Piero tries his hand at talking for himself seeing as how Madison is still on the shelf. Piero owes a lot to Madison as she took a chance on him when no one else would. He feels like he let her down because he was supposed to be looking out for her the same way she looked out for a rookie like him. Chris Collins doesn't get to walk away from something like this unscathed just because he's been here longer and has a longer resume. If anything, he should know better that retribution is coming for him, one way or another. Unforgiven will be proof of that. Even match here as I should start making Ziggy into something. It comes to end when both men are on the outside but Chris Collins makes himself known and captures the attention of Piero. Styles sneaks back into the ring while Piero is distracted and beats the count. Piero is aghast at this but it doesn't matter because Collins moves in for the kill and delivers a beat down on Piero. ****1/2, 91% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Kyle Jacobs vs. Brandon Reigns
It's pre-match promo night apparently as Reigns takes the mic and warns everyone who may still be on the fence over whether or not to order Unforgiven this Sunday. He apologizes ahead of time for what they are going to witness in his match against Seth Von Kamp. It's a Last Man Standing match for the Intercontinental Title that was unjustly ripped from Reigns at SummerSlam but the rules basically allow Reigns to dish out every ounce of frustration and embarrassment in the name of victory and believe him when he says that he's been getting down right creative. Seth has had his moment in the sun and that's going to have to be the small bit of comfort he's going to have to hold on to when he's laying in bed, depressed and beaten and broken and humiliated, for the rest of his career, however long that may be after Reigns is done with him. Kyle Jacobs interrupts the tirade and says that it's good to see Brandon back in form. After all, who is Brandon Reigns if he's not out here yelling at the clouds about what he's owed and making empty threats? Kyle himself was on the receiving end of all of that at one point and that experience he had taught him a lot. It taught him about bluster and that the weakest dog needs to bark the loudest, a lesson he's going to carry into Unforgiven when he faces Xavier Cross. Well, with those promos out of the way, we get these two going at it, sort of reigniting their feud from a few months ago. They work well together, obviously, so of course we get a hell of a way to cap off the night. Xavier Cross, however, just can't help himself as he runs down to attack Kyle as he's setting up Reigns for the Legacy Bomb. HERE COMES SETH VON KAMP!!! It's a double brawl to close things out that unfortunately ends with the heels getting the duke and leaving Kyle and Seth laying. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR UNFORGIVEN?!?!?! *****, 95% overall.

Overall Show Rating: 88%

Next up: THE GAUNTLET!!!

Superstars: September 27, 2040

It's gauntlet night!!! We've got ourselves a series of tag team matches with the final team standing being awarded the WWE Unified Tag Team Titles! Let's get right to it!

Opening Match: The British Infection vs. The Agents of Change
Oof, bad draw for these guys. And to think Lisa Benton was nice enough to just let in the Agents of Change at the last minute on Raw. Good way to start things out as these guys set the tone for the rest of the night. Corey is left alone with the faces and falls victim to the Queen's English and the Brits stay in it. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Second Match: The British Infection vs. Galino & Farnes
Not much of a better draw for the crack legal team here. Luscious accompanies her boys as they're looking to add some more gold to their collection. More good shit as the heels have really found their place as goons for Hotbody when not too long ago they were just another team. Luscious makes with the distraction by attacking Fantasee and the heels are able to hit Adrian with SERIOUS INQUIRIES!!! to give them the win and to send them into the next round. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Third Match: Galino & Farnes vs. The Wasteland
Let's see if things fare better for the faces here. A much better match than the first two. Things are still not in the favor of the Wasteland here as Luscious slides Jimmy the GAVEL OF DOOM behind the ref's back and he brings it down on the skull of Duke. A three count later and the heels are going to the next round. *****, 95% overall.

Fourth Match: Galino & Farnes vs. The Play Pals
The streak for the heels might be in jeopardy here. Indeed that is the case as fatigue might be getting the best of them. Jimmy tries the GAVEL OF DOOM once again but Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle come out and surround Luscious. That's enough to give Jimmy pause and that allows Gavin to schoolboy him for the pin and to send the Play Pals to the next round. Demiras and LaSalle chase off the heels. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Fifth Match: The Play Pals vs. The Royal Effect
Well lookee here. More of an all out brawl than an organized match as things seem to be reaching a boiling point between these guys. That blow off needs to happen soon. Certainly not tonight as the referee loses all control and ends up counting both teams out to eliminate them both. *****, 99% overall. Will we eventually see a 100% rating???

Sixth Match: The Love Connection vs. The Academy
No time to ponder that right now. The Love Connection is the new team name for Caleb Greene and Stanley Coleman. I figure since they're under the watch of someone named Aphrodite they should have some sort of name befitting of that. The Academy don't have Brooke with them. Things must have been way more heated on Raw than we imagined. Pretty basic here in order to calm the crowd down after the mess we just witnessed. With no help on their side, the Academy has to take matters into their own hands and Coleman suffers the Today's Lesson from Randy Ellis to give the Academy the win. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Seventh Match: The Academy vs. The Dillingers
The Dillingers are full of fire here. Ronnie Costello eventually comes out to be in the corner of the Academy. Still no Brooke. Pretty extended affair here as these guys work awesome together. Ronnie tries his hand at helping when Joey has Justin in trouble but that classic heel miscommunication bug kicks in and Ronnie ends up KO-ing Justin leading Joey to come off the top with the Dillinger Escape Plan for the pin. Things are not well in Camp Brooke. *****, 96% overall.

Eighth Match: The Dillingers vs. The Future Foundation
The champions with one hell of a draw here. They might come out of this well enough after all. The Dillingers are hella fatigued despite the one match. It's a hard fought affair but Julian Merrick resorts to some classic pulling of the tights on Joey to score the pin and send them into the next round. *****, 94% overall.

Ninth Match: The Future Foundation vs. The Wyldhearts
The Wyldhearts with an even better draw and that puts them in prime position to win the whole thing as the Dillingers took a lot out of the champions. It's a pretty heated affair with the faces coming so close more often than not. Vivian Merrick ultimately proves to the be difference maker as the grabs Blaine's leg to stop the Wyldhearts from hitting the Heartstopper on Rick Hilton. That leads to Rick low blowing Robbie Greer as Julian takes out Blaine and Robbie falls victim to the Check Out Time and that gives the Future Foundation the win! They managed to retain and survive the night!!! *****, 95% overall.

Well that looks to be it as the the Future Foundation celebr....HOLD THE PHONE!!! Lisa Benton comes out to the stage to tell us that all of the celebratory shenanigans need to be put on the backburner for right now. The Future Foundation isn't done yet. Lisa reminds us that back on Raw she said that all of the spots hadn't been filled yet. So that leaves us with just one more team that barely made the cut at the wire. So with that said, let's bring out the final team.

The music of Paul Andrews hits and he makes his way out with a smile on his face. He rubs his hands with glee as he looks out to the crowd and to the Future Foundation in the ring. He turns to the entrance and HOLY SHIT!!!!! IT'S ADAM HAIL!!! This King of the Ring winner hasn't been in the WWE for years!!! He's also been a tag team champion, too!!! Is this the big thing that Paul Andrews has been alluding to these past few wee...HOLY MOTHER OF FUCKING SHIT!!! IT'S SIMON BENNETT!!! He's also a King of the Ring winner and won the tag team titles with Adam Hail! A former Unified World and Intercontinental Champion, too! This is one hell of a coup for Paul Andrews!!! AND THEY'RE MAKING THEIR WAY TO THE RING!!!

Final Match: The Future Foundation vs. Adam Hail and Simon Bennett
The Future Foundation are just as shocked and awestruck as the rest of us as the bell rings! Hail and Bennett just annihilate the champions here. Bennett traps Rick Hilton in the Bennett Lock while Adam Hail sends Julian Merrick into his sister and knocks him down setting him up for the Hail Storm off the top rope!!! 1....2....3!!! WE HAVE NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!!!!! WTF?!?!? ****1/2, 92% overall.

Overall show rating: 92%

Oh, right, forgot about Phoebe Hanson also getting a nice little suspension for her ass. Her fine, curvy, juicy, provocative ass....

All kinds of wonderful goodness in that gauntlet. Imagining it play out in real life is quite interesting - just two straight hours of excellent tag team wrestling.

How old are Hail and Bennett? I love the idea of bringing back two former big names out of nowhere.

Huh, I actually hadn't paid attention to their age so I needed to open the program to check.

Adam Hail is 37. Simon Bennett is 38. So they're in that age range where they can still be relatively reliable for the main event scene while at the same time giving a pretty good rub to any up and comers who need it. Despite the close age, Bennett has more miles on him than Hail. They're solid hands, just not overly charismatic. Now with the ability to make managers at will they deserve another shot, I think. I sort of picture them in the same vein as Dean Malenko and *DATA EXPUNGED*, you know, just two solid wrestlers that can be counted on to deliver the goods.

Also it's worth noting that these are the two wrestlers I spoke of who ended up getting extremely sweet open contract payoffs thanks to my fuck up. :o

:lol: I’m shocked another promotion didn’t sign them on, although you might be essentially the only game in town by now.

After those open contracts they damn well better get the belts!

Yeah, but the thing is Hail's contract is $275,000; Bennett's is $264,000. That's over half a million dollars I have to pay out PER APPEARANCE! Not even Jenna gets that kind of preferential treatment. I'm going to need to play this smart because no way can I have them popping up on all three shows every week.

One night a week with Jenna would get me to lower my rate.

SmackDown!: September 28, 2040

It's the final stop before Unforgiven! Let's see how the roster does its best to not fuck things up for the PPV!

We open with Paul Andrews, the manager of the NEW WWE Unified Tag Team Champions, Adam Hail and Simon Bennett. He comes out alone and grabs a mic to address the crowd. He's saddened to report that the new champions are off on one hell of a media blitz after the bombshell of last night on Superstars. Bringing in Hail and Bennett was something that Andrews had been working on for the longest time. It was quite the blow to have to say goodbye to Bobby Whitlock and then later to Conner Buchanan this year. Andrews didn't think he'd be able to recover from that. But there is always opportunity and there are always ways to make an impact. The WWE parted ways with Adam Hail and Simon Bennett some time ago and there is something to be said about whether that was a wise decision. Regardless, Andrews knew that the two of them could become major players and shake things up right now. He's known the two of them for a long time and has always felt that there is so much more that they could offer before hanging things up for good. It's a whole new status quo now that Hail and Bennett are the tag team champions and any team that wants to try their hand at changing that, well the line starts right here.

Cue Vivian Merrick, the manager of the former champions, and she makes her way out to the stage. She looks quite miffed as she addresses Andrews. "Actually, the line starts here. You've got a lot of nerve walking out here and talking a big game when you know you pulled a fast one by sneaking in your guys at the last minute last night. It was a completely unfair situation. How were Hilton and Julian supposed to prepare when you and Lisa Benton are apparently in cahoots keeping secrets from everyone. All of these people here shouldn't be cheering. They should be outraged that they have a liar as their general manager and bunch of cheats as the tag team champions. Well enjoy it while you can, Paul, because I've been working on this ever since we went off the air last night. You better get Adam Hail and Simon Bennett back into business mode after all of their PR fluff because this Sunday at Unforgiven they're going to be giving The Future Foundation their rightful rematch for the Unified Tag Team Championship!"

"Oh, you really don't know Hail and Bennett all that well, do you, Vivian? They're always in business mode and they'll be more than happy to demonstrate it to you and the Future Foundation one more time. We'll see you Sunday." And thus Unforgiven gets even more packed!

Backstage, The Royal Effect want to express their grievances over the tag title situation and what they just witnessed. Forget the nonsense of the Future Foundation getting the rug pulled out from underneath them at the hands of Adam Hail and Simon Bennett. That's terrible in and of itself but the real issue is how the Royal Effect weren't the ones walking out with those belts and it's all because of having to deal with those damn Play Pals. If they were out of the way, the Royal Effect would be running the show in the tag team division, Hail and Bennett be damned.

This leads to the Play Pals coming into the scene to sling a little bit of verbal mud. They declare that they are proud to be in the way of the Royal Effect and they'll continue to do so because there's nothing they can do about it. The Play Pals owe their longevity to being better than the also-rans like the Royal Effect. In fact, McKay and Kavovit are better off just breaking up and going off to other pursuits because the Play Pals are here to stay.

McKay is intrigued with what the Play Pals are saying and it gives him an idea. Clearly, there's just too much stubborness going on here amongst the two teams for either side to just call it quits and back down. So here is the proposal: this Sunday at Unforgiven, the Play Pals vs. The Royal Effect, one more time and for the last time because here's the catch; the losing team MUST break up permanently.

Gavin and Michael look at each other warily and Kavovit chips in with his vote of confidence saying that he's got faith in the union between himself and McKay. Can the Play Pals say the same? Ultimately, the Play Pals nod at each other and Haywood agrees to the terms. Like he said before: the Play Pals are here to stay.

First Match: Ziggy Styles vs. Patrick Dean Quartermaine
I think it's high time I start making Ziggy a viable player. Ziggy points out that not all great movements started out at the time intended. Getting Ziggy With It is one of those movements. There was a rocky start, he'll admit, but all diamonds eventually make their way towards the surface. Well this is a good way to kick things off as far as the matches go. Ziggy makes the most of this showing to look good and it ends with Ziggy ducking a crossbody and hits the ThingamaZig for the pin. ****1/4, 90% overall.

Second Match: Orlando Kincaid vs. Eddy Clash
Bit of a leap in competition for Eddy Clash. Ozzy Mandias is on commentary in support of his teammate for this Sunday. Kincaid knows to make Eddy's stuff look good as the match goes on. Ultimately, Michael Hotbody sneaks up behind Ozzy from the crowd and rips his headset off. Naturally this leads to an altercation and that allows Zed Jones the chance to attack Eddy from behind and lay in some shots for the DQ while Ozzy is distracted. Ozzy pulls Hotbody over the railing so he can deliver some ass whooping of his own but Zed pushes Ozzy away and grabs Hotbody and bails. ****1/2, 90% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time, this time with the WWE Women's Tag Team Champions The Lonely Girls, Jenna Kyle and Faith Connors. Jenna tells the story of when she was younger watching her brother lead his rugby team to a championship win when they were in school. She recalls what happened when her brother and some of his teammates got busted for disorderly conduct when they were off in the town celebrating like lunatics. Her dad was miffed, obviously, but one of the biggest lessons he instilled in her brother, and consequently in herself, was how to handle victory. Do you enjoy it? Yes, but above all else, you defend it. You plant your flag and never rest on your laurels because down the road you've got who-knows-what coming after you to take it all away and if you're caught face down, drool leaving your mouth, and your ass in the air it will have been for nothing. So that's the approach that Jenna has taken in her career here in the WWE and she's extended that to her partnership with Faith. They made history at SummerSlam but that's only a page. Faith and Jenna want volume after volume after volume of history and the only way that's going to happen is to take wearing these titles seriously and being prepared for the worst. Faith brings up how this Sunday might not be the worst but it'll be a fight nonetheless. She understands that there is a lot of bitterness on the other side. It can drive someone to throw out all of their sensibilities. It can motivate them to be even more dangerous. She knows that she and Jenna are in for a long night because Naomi is the Women's Champion and it's still not enough for her and Eclypse has a huge chip on her shoulder that's begging for relief. Well the bad news is that Jenna and Faith aren't in the business of relief so Unforgiven is going to be another disappointment. The good news? Naomi and Eclypse won't really need to put up with each other anymore.

This brings out Naomi and Eclypse themselves and they address the comments from the Lonely Girls from the stage. Faith is wrong in her assessment because last week the alliance between Naomi and Eclypse has been reforged. There is an understanding. There is a connection. There is a union where the two of them think as one. Destroying the Lonely Girls is a worthwhile goal and it's a bonus to do it alongside family and get a hold of those belts in the process. Everyone is talking about how this is the last chance. Well Eclypse and Naomi aren't going to need another when it's all said and done. At Unforgiven, your page in history gets ripped out and burned.

Third Match: The Perfections and The Southern Belles vs. The Internet Darlings and The Glamour Brigade
Some tension on the heel side as they've been sniping at each other from afar these last few weeks. Both have made pretty good cases for being the next team to get a chance at the Women's Tag Team Titles. Well the bottom line here is that it's 8 lovely and talented women with a lot of time so you can expect some good shit here. Nathan Quinn trips up Lauren Franklyn for the benefit of Leah but Hannah tags herself in and goes up top and hits the Spotlight on a fallen Lauren to take the pin for herself. Both Nathan and Leah seem a tad peeved. ****1/2, 89% overall.

More interview time backstage, this time with the WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp, ahead of his Last Man Standing match against Brandon Reigns. He wants to talk about how Brandon seems to have this weird and warped view on the career of Seth Von Kamp. Seth has been out in that ring walking the walk and etching his name in so many memorable moments in the WWE that Reigns can only hope achieve. Seth just didn't do it with a championship around his waist. So if Brandon Reigns is looking at this Sunday with a gleam in his eye and a spring in his step because he thinks he's got the next best thing to a night off, he's in for a rude awakening. Seth's gone through cage matches, ladder matches, no DQ matches, and even the very best of Braden Walker. Brandon's going to have to pull out something major in order to surprise Seth and take back the Intercontinental Title. The sad thing being, Seth's got a much bigger sack than Reigns.

Fourth Match: Jordan Demiras vs. Freddie Galino
Neither man's respective partners are out here in order to keep things level. It's evenly matched, all things considered. Galino looks like he's in position for an Axe Kick from Demiras but he decides to roll out of the ring and bail, evidently having had enough for the night. He gets counted out as he yells threats to Demiras and Martyn LaSalle for this Sunday. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Even more interview time backstage as we join Xavier Cross. Cross is looking forward to making Jacobs his personal sidekick after demolishing that brash, wet behind the years child, Kyle Jacobs. Cross deserves more respect and this year everyone seemed to think that it was the perfect time to toss that ideal out the window. Cross headlined WrestleMania 50 for crying out loud! EVERY new punk that signs on to this roster should have one thing in mind as the first thing they should do. That one thing is finding Cross backstage and asking for the privilege to partake in the fountain of wisdom that is his experience. Has that been the case? NO! We've got beefed-up simpletons stealing briefcases, some wise ass going around asking people to get Ziggy with him, whatever the hell that means, and then you've got Kyle Jacobs who thinks he was born with a Masters in the business where Cross is the master. And now, after Unforgiven, Cross will the master over Kyle Jacobs.

Fifth Match: Clubber Harris vs. Quentin McDaniels
McDaniels announces that he'll be facing Kerry Cemenko one more time on the pre-show this Sunday. He proclaims that having a guy like Cemenko around is the reason why two chumps like Adam Hail and Simon Bennett feel justified in coming back and taking up valuable roster space. That Cemenko has been a Unified World Champion and the chances just keep getting yanked away from McDaniels is criminal and he's going to know full well how that makes McDaniels feel. This is a pretty boss match. I probably should have let it be the main even but we've got to have the champion do his segment and push that PPV main event. Harris tries to superplex Quentin off the top but Quentin counters by slamming Harris' head into the exposed turnbuckle, knocking Harris off. Quentin comes off the top with the Curb Stomp and that's enough for the pin and the victory. *****, 95% overall.

FINAL SEGMENT: We're joined by the WWE Unified World Champion Noah Carmichael in one more In-Ring Super Special Talky Time. Sanctioned or not sanctioned, Noah agrees with the assessment from Brooke in regards to this Sunday. Salvatore Scabbia does indeed deserve to partake in what is owed to him. That thing that he is owed, of course, is the most royal of ass kickings courtesy of yours truly, Noah Carmichael. Almost everyone in the WWE nowadays just seems to love tossing around that word: "deserve". Oh, this person deserves this. This other person also deserves this. You don't deserve that. It's almost lost all of its God damn meaning! In this business, you get what you put into it. It's as simple as that. Maybe those two years of winning did something to Scabbia's sense of entitlement but it's a whole different animal when you're dealing with Noah Carmichael. He knows he's not going into Unforgiven 100% and he's certainly not leaving 100%. There are only two major goals that need to get accomplised: keeping that Unified World Title and making sure Salvatore Scabbia learns that he got exactly what he deserved.

Cue the music of...Wrakk??? He joins Carmichael in the ring and mocks his words. Wrakk is the one person above all other who has the right to talk about who deserves what. Last he checked, before he had to go on his leave of absence, Wrakk was holding that same championship Carmichael is proudly prancing around here. Oh, Noah may have had to go through hell to win it, but he didn't go through Wrakk. In fact, the whole reason Wrakk was even champion to begin with was because HE went through Carmichael. So the "champion" has very little room to be throwing stones. Wrakk is out here because he wants to make it clear that despite the business he has with Haven and the important business he has this Sunday with Ryan Pattillo, Carmichael needs to understand that it's all groundwork for the inevitable. Defeat Scabbia if possible; then prepare for history to repeat itself.

Cue Ryan Pattillo who comes out to get in Wrakk's face. Wrakk doesn't have all of his ducks in a row just yet because Pattillo is one hell of a road block to get around. Between Wrakk and Butch Fleming, the understanding that the WWE has moved on has really been lost. Wrakk may be itching to get that title, but not before Pattillo because he's got a much better case as far as being overdue goes. Wrakk declares that the only case Pattillo has is a case of terminal stupidity. WE'VE GOT A BRAWL! Pattillo and Wrakk go at it as Noah looks on. SCABBIA SNEAKS IN BEHIND CARMICHAEL!!! He locks in the Omerta! We go off the air as both faces are at the mercy of their opponents!

Overall show rating: 89%

Next up: UNFORGIVEN!

Hey, hey, Robbie Greer! Fuck you and your little interview that's getting you suspended for the rest of the month. :)

Unforgiven 2040: September 30, 2040

Pre-Show Match: Quentin McDaniels vs. Kerry Cemenko
I'm almost afriad of using Cemenko in the pre-show because of the precedent he set not too long ago of having a GOAT encounter not on the PPV. Fortunately these guys scale things back a bit. Not by a lot as they still have to set the tone for the night. Kerry is OFFENDED at Quentin's use of his own Curb Stomp on SmackDown! and thus he tries to pull one off the top rope just like Quentin did. The ref is out of position and doesn't see Quentin loading up the brass knuckles and Cemenko comes down with his nuts landing on Quentin's fist. A small package later and Quentin gets the duke. *****, 94% overall.

Unforgiven starts now! Your theme for tonight is "Reckless" by Lacuna Coil.

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Opening Match: WWE Unified Tag Team Championship
Adam Hail and Simon Bennett (c) w/Paul Andrews vs. The Future Foundation w/Vivian Merrick
A rematch from the gauntlet a few nights ago. Vivian points out that this is a completely different scenario than before. The Future Foundation are actually prepared for those two cheats. Her boys are called the Future Foundation for a reason and there's no room in the future for a couple of veteran rejects! It's a hot opener to say the least, although Cemenko and McDaniels had the charisma advantage so this suffers a bit in comparison. Hail and Bennett haven't lost a step as they outmatch the former champions with experience. Vivian tries her hand at distracting the ref but Andrews merely picks her up off the apron, drapes her over his shoulders and carries her off up the ramp. Julian is aghast at this and that opens him up to Bennett locking in the Bennett Lock for the submission. Hail and Bennett retain! ****1/2, 90% overall.

Second Match: Xavier Cross vs. Kyle Jacobs
Cross reiterates the stipulations here with glee. Jacobs has certainly come a long way in the almost 2 years he's been on the roster. The main event scene would be great for him if it wasn't so crowded right now. These guys have awesome chemistry and it comes down to Cross setting up Jacobs for the Cross Cutter but Jacobs counters by lifting Cross up into the Legacy Bomb and adds in a jacknife roll-up for good measure to get the surprise pin. Looks like no servitude for Jacobs after all! *****, 95% overall.

Third Match: The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody, Zed Jones, and Galino & Farnes vs. Ozzy Mandias, Eddy Clash, Jordan Demiras, and Martyn LaSalle
Ozzy has a lot on the line here as he has to captain this impressive collection of a team. Hotbody has ZERO interest in participating here and decides that his attention is better spent making googly eyes at Luscious and exploring the back of her throat with his tongue. She might have something lodged in there! Anyways, this is a wild affair. The pace slows a bit when Zed and Eddy have their little showdown, a preview of things for down the road. Fast forward to the end as Demiras and Farnes are the legal men. Zed and Eddy disappear up the ramp, Ozzy chases Hotbody around the ring, and Luscious tries to slip Farnes the GAVEL OF DOOM but Demiras intercepts it. He looks like he's going to nail Luscious with it! Farnes tries to sneak attack but Demiras dodges, knocking Farnes into Luscious. Axe Kick off the top rope! Demiras scores the pin for the faces! ****1/2, 90% overall.

Fourth Match: Wrakk vs. Ryan Pattillo
These guys pick up right where they left off on SmackDown!. I actually feel kind of bad treating a guy like Pattillo like an afterthought. He was actually THE face of the company for a while before I just arbitrarily switched to Carmichael. In my defense, the Carmichael vs. all of his former buddies was a pretty hot thing. Anyways, maybe in the near future he can headline a PPV or two, who knows? What I do know is this match is all Wrakk just being brutal but Pattillo taking it and asking for more. There's only so much he can take, though, and his attempt at the Shutdown gets, well, shut down as Wrakk reverses into the Demon Cross to score the pin. *****, 94% overall.

Fifth Match: WWE Women's Tag Team Championship
The Lonely Girls (c) vs. WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey and Eclypse
Aaaaand here we go again. Just wonderful, pant-tightening goodness all around here. Eclypse and Naomi look more driven and focused here than at SummerSlam. The end comes down to Faith and Eclypse as the legal women. Eclypse sets up Faith for the Fade to Black but Faith escapes. Naomi, having dispatched Jenna to the outside, tries to lend a boot by going for a kick to Faith's face. Faith ducks and the boots knocks down Eclypse. Naomi face palms but Jenna comes back in and dives at her sending them both to the outside. Eclypse stumbles back up to her feet but is greeted by Faith hitting the Mirror's Edge! Naomi knocks down Jenna again and sees Faith pinning Eclypse. She looks to go in to break it up but seems to stop herself at the last second. Faith gets the pin allowing the Lonely Girls to retain! Could Naomi have helped Eclypse there? *****, 96% overall. Match of the Night so far.

Sixth Match: WWE Intercontinental Championship - Last Man Standing
Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Brandon Reigns
Well these guys will see that 5 stars and 96% overall rating and raise you....

https://i.imgur.com/xboun28.png

Certainly this will be on the ballot for Match of the Year when the Slammys come around, no? Seth retains as Brandon gets carted off.

Seventh Match: The Play Pals vs. The Royal Effect
Losers must split up as a team. Let's see what the game gives this outing. You would think this would be the magical 100% rating we've been looking for, right?

https://i.imgur.com/lHGoFeq.png

Well, go fuck yourself, EWR. I'm convinced that it's just not possible to get 100% overall, no matter the circumstances. Even Jenna vs. Luscious in a Topless Tapioca Pudding Extravaganza Match. Well, regardless, this means no more Play Pals and the two look at each other after the match with the appearance that they might just break down in tears. What's next for them moving forward?

MAIN EVENT: Unsanctioned Match - WWE Unified World Champion Noah Carmichael vs. Salvatore Scabbia w/Brooke
Brooke gets on the mic and calls Noah brave but stupid for showing up here. Salvatore appreciates it but he came for what was promised him. Brooke doesn't give a damn about the match not being sanctioned; she DEMANDS that Noah agree to putting the title on the line like he was supposed to. Unless he feels comfortable just hiding behind Lisa Benton and her orders. Noah merely looks at both belts and hands them to the ref and nods his head! Is this even allowed? Well, regardless, unsanctioned means anything goes pretty much. It's a valiant effort on behalf of Carmichael but he's feeling the effects of what he's been through. They fight to the stage and it finally looks like Carmichael may have the upper hand and he looks to send Scabbia flying off the stage. Brooke gets Carmichael's attention and Carmichael grabs her as he's apparently had enough. Scabbia takes the opportunity to strike!!! He grabs Carmichael from behind and sends him into some of the set before locking in the Omerta! Carmichael fights like hell to break the hold but he's got no way of forcing a break other than his own strength. Sadly it looks like that's all tapped out and Carmichael ends up fading. The ref can't get a response and he calls for the bell!!! Scabbia wins! Brooke immediately grabs the belts and hands them to Scabbia! But he can't really be champion, right? ****1/2, 91% overall.

Overall show rating: 95%

Well that PPV ruled all kinds of ass, as you'd come to expect.

Starting off strong with the returning legends retaining their belts and cashing their paychecks accordingly.....thankfully you are probably making money hand over fist.

I call bullshit on that 8-man tag finish, the GAVEL OF DOOM is reserved strictly for legal personnel, he has no right at all to wield that object. There needs to be an inquiry made into this match, a SERIOUS one you might say.

I wouldn't worry too much about Pattillo seeming like an afterthought, the roster is so loaded there's no real way to avoid deprioritizing guys at different times. Kinda like with the current AEW roster, there's a luxury where you can almost write people off for a little bit rather than having them spinning their tires, and you lose nothing in your programming in the interim. Actually I think that's one of the benefits of using the "convert to manager" option as the guy won't lose morale as they effectively take a vacation.

Lonely Girls retaining is always best for business. Naomi clearly just got a last second leg cramp or something or else she totally would've broken up that pin!

Hot damn @ the Reigns/SVK and Royal Effect/Play Pals matches back to back. Talk about overload. You definitely got the big screw on the tag match rating. I've noticed that while the overall rating is GENERALLY the midpoint of the other two, I've definitely had it happen where it ends up being one point lower even if the other two are the same.

I'd say this provides some level of closure though that maybe it simply isn't possible for it to ever be perfect. Kinda makes me want to test something out though where I create a new game save and use Arsenic to make a couple people 100 stats across the board and see if the perfect score is achievable. If that doesn't work maybe I'd even try making it so all my staff is 100 too. More likely though it's this way on purpose where you can never get a 100% perfect or else there's theoretically nowhere else to go.

BAH GAWD some serious controversy to end the show, sounds like a cliffhanger worth tuning in to Raw for.

Some end of the month notes as we roll into October:

Here are some birthdays. Had some development guys also celebrate but best to keep them under wraps for right now: Moses McKay (30), Shawn Dangerson (36), Salvatore Scabbia (26), Vinnie LaPaige (25), Wrakk (32), Rick Hilton (26)

Was worried that the game was going to fuck me by sending Dangerson on the path to retirement. He can't retire just yet, not before finally winning the Cruise....er, hey, look at this alternate profile of Luscious which is totally not a distraction....

https://i.imgur.com/OZLDiNS.png

Let Kelley Hayes' contract expire. Wasn't really doing anything with her these last few years and I need as much budget as possible to justify <s>spoiling Jenna and buying her love</s> the paychecks for Adam Hail and Simon Bennett.

Got 5 NXT guys who I'm told are ready to go. I'LL be the judge of that. Here's the skinny:

Ethan Lang: Only 23, not charismatic but probably the most skilled as far as in-ring goes. Need to decide which manager gets him.

Katie Fraser: 25, don't really like the name. Also poor in the charisma department but a good hand.

Laura England: 24, less talented than Katie but more charismatic. I'll probably just feud the two of them to get them both up in the overness.

Neil Quint: 24, cruiserweight. His speed is the only top stat but his charisma is a 90. He'll be a keeper.

Zoey Turner: 23, the least talented and least charismatic of all. Not sure where she'll fit in, if I even decide to keep her.

Nothing else really major happening. I'll try to get Raw done before tomorrow is over.

Raw: October 1, 2040

We open with Lisa Benton addressing the audience from her office backstage. She understands the state of confusion that some of us may have had at the conclusion of last night's main event at Unforgiven but she promises that the state of the Unified World Title will be cleared up. Noah Carmichael, unfortunately, is not here but Salvatore Scabbia is and Lisa Benton expects him and Brooke to be out there later tonight so that the whole matter can be resolved. In the meantime, everyone watching should enjoy the show, especially the main event in which Wrakk will go one on one with the Intercontinental Champion, Seth Von Kamp.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He wants to discuss the fact that despite what went down last night in his match, he's actually in a pretty good mood. For starters he's still the WWE Cruiserweight Champion despite all the low, underhanded tactics that have deployed by his various challengers. Second, he's proud to unveil a bit of merchandise that truly captures the essence of the tremendous roll that he's been on. Hotbody unzips his jacket and proceeds to remove it revealing a shirt that reads "EL DANDY FEARS HOTBODY". "As you can see this shirt is all about telling the truth. The harsh truth, just like I do every time I come out here. But it's time for the real reason to be happy and the reason I'm out here tonight. This is a very special edition of the Hot Button because I am going to interview the number one contender for my Cruiserweight Title right now! This has been something I've been looking forward to for a while and I'm excited. So without further ago, let's get down to business. Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming the number one contender for the Cruiserweight Title.......NOBODY!!! HAHAH! That's right: NOBODY! Oh, please allow me to help you with your confusion. Yes, last night Ozzy Mandias's team was victorious when Jordan Demiras screwed Jimmy Farnes but as you will recall the stipulation laid out by Lisa Benton was that if OZZY MANDIAS was victorious, then Ozzy Mandias would get a shot at the title. Oh, you think I'm kidding? Let's roll the tape!"

We go to the big screen and it shows the moment from SmackDown! over a week ago where Lisa Benton stopped Ozzy from fighting with Hotbody. Indeed the clip shows the following bit of dialogue from Benton: "And to Michael's point, you kind of need to earn a shot at the Cruiserweight Title. So I'm going to make a bit of a compromise. At Unforgiven, Ozzy, you will lead a team composed of yourself, Eddy Clash, Jordan Demiras, and Martyn LaSalle against Michael Hotbody's team of Zed Jones and Galino & Farnes. And should you win, Ozzy, you will get your match against Michael Hotbody for the Cruiserweight Title!"

Back to Hotbody in the ring as he's giddy as a schoolgirl. "Well, there you have it. I didn't make the match so you can't blame me. Sad day for Ozzy as things just can't seem to go his way. On the bright side, El Dandy, if you're watching the door is wide open for you if you still think you're man enough! These shirts are going to sell like hotcakes and they'll be all over the place so there's no way you can ignore me forever!" During this spiel, Ozzy runs down and gets him some of Hotbody as he's evidently had enough of his nonsense. He DARES TO RIP THE SHIRT OFF!!! Hotbody goes to the eye to slow down the fury of Ozzy and takes the opportunity to bail.

First Match: Chris Collins vs. Raymond Delaney
Collins gets on the mic in a fury and addresses Alexander Piero. Collins was supposed to take care of Piero last night at Unforgiven but from what he understands Piero had to take care of some sort of emergency regarding Madison. That's just typical of a guy like Piero and proof of what Collins has been saying all along about him. Collins destroyed his own father to get the recognition and attention and reputation that he enjoys to this date. What's Piero going to do? He doesn't have that same killer instinct, that drive that's going to help him get one over the members of the cream of the crop. All Piero has is a "bye, golly!" attitude and a pair of puppy dog eyes for useless skirts like Madison! And if that's all he's going to bring to the table should he finally man up and face Collins, he's going to get torn apart. To the match itself, Collins indeed walks the walk and controls pretty well here. He gets a nice solid victory after hitting the Fall From Heaven. Afterwards Alexander Piero makes himself known by trying to get him some of Chris Collins! They brawl a bit outside of the ring and Collins, in desparation, shoves Piero over the announce table and he uses that to make his exit. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Second Match: WWE Unified Tag Team Champions Adam Hail and Simon Bennett vs. The Academy
Brooke is with the Academy and grabs the mic to address a few things. First and foremost, she tells Lisa Benton that there is only one method of recourse for her to follow and that is recognizing Salvatore Scabbia as the NEW Unified World Champion. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. She promises to be out here later with Scabbia for confirmation and to rub it in everyone's faces. Secondly, Brooke talks to the Academy and bares her soul to them. It took last night for her to finally come around to the epiphany that she may have been putting Randy and Justin on the backburner as far as priorities go. She should have been better than that and she understands any negative feelings the two of them may be harboring. It's just the prospect of finally managing a World Champion was such a huge opportunity that it became practically all-consuming. She doesn't think any less of The Academy. Hell, they've been her longest-running clients and they've been that way for a reason. She knows they can get the job done and they're going to prove it right now against these interlopers managed by a has-been that's trying to live vicariously through them. This could be the stepping stone leading to a magnificent picture of all of Brooke's clients wearing championship gold! Well, pretty words and all, and certainly The Academy are game and give the champions a good effort. However, fate has other plans for them. Ronnie Costello tries his hand at interfering but Justin Mitchell points behind him trying to warn Ronnie of Paul Andrews coming up behind him. It's enough chaos to allow Simon Bennett to lock in the Bennett Lock on Justin and that's enough for the submission. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Backstage, Nathan Quinn is with his team, The Perfections, and they want to address the Women's Tag Team Champions, the Lonely Girls. Indeed, Faith and Jenna are deserving of congratulations and all of that fun stuff but Leah and Bonnie here aren't about fun. They are about perfection. They are about finally putting Jenna and Faith in the lower recesses of our memories. They are about being the next WWE Women's Tag Team Champions. The Lonely Girls could only run for so long before their unfinished business caught up with them. And a word of warning to any other teams with any bright ideas to stand in the way of Leah and Bonnie: DON'T.

Third Match: Lonny Richards vs. Cameron Harper
Just a match to put Lonny over and to send a message regarding Nathan Quinn's managing capabilities. Lonny gets the submission win with the Dragon Sleeper. ****1/2, 92% overall.

More talk show time as we join Ziggy Styles as he's prepared to host Gettin' Ziggy With It. "What's this? TWO talk shows in one night? You people are all certainly lucky and that's why I'm expecting everyone in this arena, from the nosebleed section to the camera operators around ringside, to GET ZIGGY WITH IT! Now I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't have something juicy to tackle. In fact, it's probably the juiciest bit of gossip going on in the locker room right now. If you would indulge me, please direct your attention to the big screen, and perhaps you can get a hint at what I'm talking about."

The screen shows still images from the closing moments of the Women's Tag Team Title match last night at Unforgiven. We see the accidental boot from Naomi that knocked down Eclypse, Faith hitting the Mirror's Edge on Eclypse, and finally the controversial moment where it looked like Naomi could have saved the match for her team but didn't make a move. We return to Ziggy in the ring as he continues. "Now, from the looks of things, it's been the hot rumor that there are some major problems in the camp of Eclypse and the Women's Champion, Naomi Bailey. Well, I'd like to give them the platform right here, right now, to clear the air and settle things. What exactly went down last night? Eclypse? Naomi? By all means, come on down and get Ziggy with all of us!"

A bit of time passes before the music of Naomi hits and both she and Eclypse come out looking disgusted. They join Ziggy in the ring and grab mics. Naomi goes first as she's all up in Ziggy's grill. "Boy, I don't know where you get off running that mouth and making demands and stirring the pot and all that jazz. You're barely a God damn blip on the radar so you need to watch yourself and whatever comes out of that piehole of yours. As far as last night goes, what can I say other than it speaks for itself?"

Eclypse speaks up in response to this and addresses Naomi. "And what's that supposed to mean?"

"It means it's fairly obvious that I wasn't able to get back to the ring in time to save your ass again."

Eclypse is clearly taken back by that and fires back. "Save my ass? SAVE MY ASS? Quite frankly, it would've been the least you could've done for me after you got your wires crossed and kicked me in the face!"

"Hey, hey, I know I just said this to this little pile of nobody over here but I'll repeat it for you: watch your God damn mouth. Who do you think you're talking to? I am the Women's Champion! The Queen of Queens! I don't owe people explanations. I expect for anyone that's going to be beside me to be on my level and carry their weight. NO EXCEPTIONS! I would've thought that it'd be easy for a member of my own family but maybe I was wrong."

"No. I was wrong. This was all a big mistake. I knew I should've said no to you when this all started. I had one request and that was for you to not make me regret agreeing to team up with you. Well all I have is a big pile of regrets because I certainly don't have the tag team championship and I apparently don't have a partner." And with that Eclypse throws down her mic and takes her leave. Naomi is shocked at this and can only watch, jaw open, hands outstretched.

Fourth Match: Ryan Pattillo vs. Orlando Kincaid
Have to rebuild Pattillo somewhat. He had a bit of a rough night, as did his fellow Hunters, the Play Pals. He's not letting that, or my continued poor treatment of him, get him down as he works well with Kincaid here to deliver the goods. See what I mean about feeling bad for him. It's like he works harder just out of spite. Anyways, he manages to hit the Shutdown to score the pin. Afterwards, the Play Pals, well, I guess the former Play Pals, Gavin Jones and Michael Haywood saunter down and join Pattillo in the ring. Gavin takes a mic and addresses Pattillo. The unfortunate truth that everyone has to face is that last night at Unforgiven was the final time he and Michael can ever be partners. Michael and Gavin have been thinking it over long and hard and they've ultimately come to the conclusion that the two of them splitting would be the best lead-in to the Hunters just ending entirely. The three of them have been through so much, from the days when it was four of them with Jason Sorola, to WrestleMania 50 where everyone of them became a champion, to the roster split, and ultimately what went down last night. There's really no path forward as a group anymore and it's high time that the three of them just went their separate ways. Ryan Pattillo listens to all of this and takes it in with a solemn expression. He's almost in tears as he looks down, not wanting to look at Michael and Gavin in the eyes. Ultimately he takes the mic and addresses the two of them. It was a good ride, he supposes, but deep down he knew it eventually had to come to an end, one way or another. It's a shame Jason Sorola isn't here with them because it almost feels wrong to bring an end to this era without him. Ryan isn't as high on the idea as Gavin and Michael but there comes a time when the reality of a situation needs to be accepted. He'll miss this and he wishes everyone the best. Michael and Gavin thank him for the understanding and they thank the crowd and everyone at home watching for the amazing ride they've been on. The three men hug it out and take their leave waving to the crowd. *****, 94% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time, this time we've got Xavier Cross up to bat. What he just witnessed not that long ago between the former Hunters made him want to puke. No one cares about their little melodrama! They were stupid punks and quite frankly this is probably what they needed to give them a kick in the pants to start being adults. They can start being serious superstars, like Xavier Cross! Cross takes this business very seriously and he's a fountain of knowledge and maturity. Everyone should be looking up to him and following his example! But, no, what does Cross have to put up with? A bunch of smart-mouthed wet-behind-the-ears slouches who wouldn't know a legend if they got smacked upside the head by one. Well, Kyle Jacobs had his chance to sit under the learning tree as Cross's personal bitch but you know what? That's fine by Cross. He can continue to be a directionless moron for all Cross cares. He's used to it. In fact, Cross has it on good authority that there will be a crop of new talent appearing this Thursday on Superstars. Did any of them try to get a hold of Xavier Cross for guidance? Did they come to him and offer respect and gratitude? No! It's so typical but it doesn't matter. They can all either learn the business the easy way or the hard way by getting in Cross's face!

Cue Kyle Jacobs and he comes out to the ramp to address Cross. Cross tells Jacobs that there's no further business between the two of them. Jacobs can his win and go choke on it for all Cross cares. Jacobs claims that there's still a lot that the two of them need to take care of. He pulls out a document and identifies it as the contract that the two of them signed for their Unforgiven match, with the proper stipulation that Cross wanted added. Cross points out that it's of no consequence anymore. Jacobs counters that there are HUGE consequences because of the way the contract was written. See, it doesn't say should Xavier Cross win then Kyle becomes the personal servant of Cross. It states that the loser of the match must be the personal servant of the winner. And, well, seeing as how Jacobs won, it's quite plain to see that the two of them are far from being done with each other. Jacobs tells Cross not to worry as he's got a bunch of plans for tonight that don't really require assistance but he'll give Cross some time to look over the contract and see for himself. It'll be a good way to prepare for when he's really needed. With that Jacobs takes his leave as Cross is furious at this news.

Fifth Match: Wrakk vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp
Seth looks a little worse for wear considering what he went through last night but he holds his own. Wrakk is relentless in his monstrous approach here. They end up outside and Wrakk looks to put Von Kamp through the announce table with a Demon Cross BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT! What's going on? They eventually come back on AND HOLY SHIT IT'S HAVEN!!! He's standing right in front of a surprised Wrakk! Wrakk backs up into the ring in shock as Haven continues to stare him down. The ref counts Seth out but it's an afterthought at this point as Haven climbs into the ring and gets in Wrakk's face again. WE HAVE OURSELVES A BRAWL! Looks like Wrakk isn't done with Haven. *****, 95% overall.

FINAL SEGMENT: Brooke and Salvatore Scabbia make their way out to the ring in response to Lisa Benton's earlier decree. Scabbia is still holding the WWE Unified World Title belts. Brooke declares that as champion, Salvatore Scabbia is out here as a courtesy. Scabbia is proud of the fact that he is the man that broke the stranglehold that Noah Carmichael had on the title. All this year was just a series of everyone either wondering if Noah could hold onto the title or how soon could be get back to holding the title. Well, Scabbia is less than enthusiastic about the affairs of Noah Carmichael because this company doesn't revolve around Noah Carmichael. It revolves around the best and everyone is looking at the best, right here. 6'6", 290 lbs of pure championship manliness. Pure talent! Pure ruthlessness! And it's been that way for almost 3 years and now, finally, we can see the fruits of Scabbia's labors. He deserves to be in this spot and he dares anyone to tell him different!

Cue Lisa Benton who is apparently going to tell him different. She's got some of the goon squad with her as she enters the ring, all business, and addresses Scabbia and Brooke. She thanks the two of them for their response to her demands. She's going to get right to the chase and get the obvious out of the way. The WWE is NOT going to recognize the title change from last night! Scabbia and Brooke are OUTRAGED! Lisa continues by pointing out that championships can't changes hands in an unsanctioned match. Brooke points out that Carmichael agreed to the challenge that she and Scabbia laid out. Benton counters that it doesn't matter because he was in no position to offer such a stipulation. Scabbia is no more the champion than Brooke is and he is being ORDERED to surrender the belts RIGHT NOW. Brooke is furious and tells Lisa that there's no way that title is going back to Carmichael. Lisa says that Brooke brings up a good point. The fact of the matter is, Carmichael DID lose last night and from what she understands, his doctors aren't giving him a clean bill of health anytime soon so there's no guarantee that Carmichael would be able to fulfill his obligations as champion, and Lisa isn't looking forward to a repeat of the last month. So with that said, effective immediately, Lisa Benton is declaring the Unified World Title vacant, pending review as to how to proceed. Once again, Lisa asks Scabbia to hand over the belts. Scabbia is still rather angry and defiant BUT HERE COMES CARMICHAEL FROM BEHIND! He is here after all! He attacks Scabbia and we've got ourselves another brawl. Benton grabs the belts and tries to get the goon squad to stop the madness. We go off the air with more chaos!

Overall show rating: 89%

I was gonna comment but then I saw Luscious and had to take a break for reasons. :shifty:

Anyway I'm back now.

I absolutely love the loophole Hotbody is trying to use here. For some reason I actually remember it happening in WWE at one point. I think Orton was trying to recruit members for Legacy or something and Orton ended up deciding that only Cody could join the group because he got the pin, so his partner in the match was therefore shit out of luck and out of the group. It's a brilliant way to take this angle...I know it doesn't make Ozzy very happy though. Shame he got an eyelash at the worst possible moment.

I can only imagine Hail and Bennett are making it rain at the strip club with the bag of cash they are handed after every single appearance.

:lol: Ziggy pointing out the inherent silliness of two talk shows in a single night, but it progressed what it needed to with the dissolving of Eclypse and Naomi's team. That'll set up a fire title match I'm sure.

The Hunters ending their run together totally got me in the feels :( I was waiting for Burnie Dunkelman to debut and try to salvage the group from breaking apart entirely.

Seth Von Kamp probably deserves to continue being pushed to the moon, belting out another 5 star classic right after a GOAT level match with Reigns is excellent stuff. BAH GAWD Haven is back! Time to pick that up where they've left off.

But the true highlight of the show of course is the triumphant return and subsequent title victory of the greatest World Champion of all time. FUCK YEAH, let's go Vacant!!!

https://s3.superluchas.com/2015/11/S...1.2015-WWE.jpg

I'm imagining a reality where my promotion was an actual thing televised and you'd have all of Luscious's segments DVRed and backed up on hard drives.

In fairness to Randy Orton, who the fuck would want to take Manu or Jimmy Snuka's embarrassment of a son? God damn Tamina had more of an upside.

And, yes, it was a shame that eyelash got the better of Ozzy Mandias. Hotbody would have stuck around to help out but it could've ended up worse and he most likely went to go track down Luscious for her expertise.

Oh, come on. I run a strictly professional operation and I take the appropriate measures to ensure such behavior isn't a thing in which my talent partakes.

I obviously use briefcases for all of that cash.

Yeah, it's been building for a while. I've never had Eclypse as the face and this would be a nice direction for her. I'm amazing at the mileage I've gotten from her. She's 38 and were this the real world she'd have vamoosed a long time ago. Hopefully this run can extend her career.

Burnie Dunkelman...God damn it, why do you always give me boss ideas after the fact? That'd have been fucking hilarious. It's for the best, though, that they all go their own way. I'm shocked I kept them as a unit this long. There was that brief time during the roster split, of course, where they all were on separate shows. Haywood's the only one who's never held a singles title so there's something to shoot for there.

Seth being a late bloomer might be the best thing to happen to him as he's even more valuable now. Had I been all about putting titles on him left and right in the early going chances are by now I'd have him on the chopping block.

Vacant had a nice run and all but it's nowhere near the run that Abeyance had in late 2013.

So I'm going to try to squeeze in the debuts of the NXT guys on Superstars. I decided to change the name of Laura England to Dusk and give her a goth gimmick and do the vignette thing to build her up. The other women I slapped together into a team so help with that division. This is a weird time for me in the game as I've more talent than I know what to do with. Time for some people to take some time off, I suppose.

Yeah you are loaded with talent in pretty much all facets. Time off would be a good thing.
The whole adage of "how can I miss you if you don't go away?" sorta applies with some of the talent without a clear direction at the moment.

I already know if I ever get back to my game I'll invariably be doing a roster split when I add a second show. Never want that in the real AEW but having such a stacked roster I end up getting lost trying to manage everyone.

Superstars: October 4, 2040

We're kicking things off with yet another edition of Gettin' Ziggy With It, with your host, Ziggy Styles! He's thrilled with all of the buzz that his last show got, with all of the juicy drama that went down between Eclypse and Naomi Bailey. The people have been clamoring for more and he's not going to waste any time delivering. There was some other major drama that went down on Raw and it tugged at everyone's heartstrings. It was the end of an era as the Hunters all decided to disband following the humiliating loss that Gavin Jones and Michael Haywood went through at Unforgiven. Well, no one can say that Ziggy Styles isn't the man to watch because he's planning on getting the inside scoop on that break-up. Now, seeing as they all broke up and are each doing their own thing now, there's no way Ziggy is able to get all three of the Hunters, but there is one in particular that he's eager to hear from. So without further ago, let's welcome Michael Haywood to the show!

A good amount of time passes and Ziggy has to repeat himself as he tries to welcome Haywood. Eventually Haywood comes on out with a confused look on his face. Ziggy eagerly and enthusiastically urges Haywood to enter the ring and the two eventually come face-to-face. Ziggy thanks Michael for agreeing to this because it means so much to all of the people watching who tuned it to get Ziggy with it! A lot went down over the last couple of days. There isn't a Unified World Champion. There are new Unified Tag Team Champions as Adam Hail and Simon Bennett made a shocking return. Eclypse and Naomi Bailey seem to be on the verge of a split. But that's almost peanuts compared to what Michael Haywood had to endure, isn't it? Haywood had to endure an actual split as he can no longer team with his long-time buddy, Gavin Jones, nor is there a faction of Hunters that he can find any solace. And why would there be? Haywood and the rest of his buddies drove away Jason Sorola. Ryan Pattillo has been a horrible leader who hasn't been able to get back on the top of the mountain where he used to be. And Michael and Gavin couldn't get it together for what was probably the most important night of their careers at Unforgiven and ate a loss from one heck of an up and coming team, the Royal Effect.

Michael Haywood looks like he's getting annoyed with this whole bit and asks if Ziggy is going to get around to actually asking a question. Ziggy apologizes and gets right to the point. He asks Michael where does he go from here? Let's face it and look at the facts: Jason Sorola won himself the Intercontinental Championship and then later broke away from you guys and became the Cruiserweight Champion multiple times. Even Gavin Jones managed to capture that title a few times, himself. Ryan Pattillo has been the most successful out of all of the four Hunters, with his Royal Rumble win, WrestleMania main events, and having the Unified World Title under his belt. And then there's Michael Haywood, the lone black sheep of the group who couldn't make anything of himself on his own. So what's going to be different this time around? Hell, the Hunters would probably have been better off dumping Haywood's loser ass to the curb a long time ago!

Haywood grabs Ziggy by the collar and lets him know that he didn't come out here to be part of a clown show and to get insulted. He's not sure about the future in the long run, but short term? Ziggy is the one that needs to worry about what Haywood is going to do. Haywood declares this interview over and Ziggy meekly backs away after Haywood lets him go. Haywood tries to leave but Ziggy makes with the sneak attack! It's a beat down as Ziggy is offended at being manhandled and disrespected on his show! Ziggy leaves Haywood down and out as he takes his leave.

First Match: Ethan Lang vs. Dell Killings
This is the debut of both guys actually. I'm most likely going to dump Killings as he blows as far as stats go. Ethan is the real talent here; he just needs a mouthpiece. Anyways, they try hard but it's a battle to get the crowd to give a shit. Lang hits the Bitter Languish to score the pin. **3/4, 60% overall. Not surprising.

Uh-oh, it looks like Noah Carmichael is here and he's apparently going to hijack the show by entering the ring. He sits himself down in the center and addresses what happened on Raw. It was a slap in his face as far as he's concerned. The final twist of the knife that he had to suffer. He can deal with losing the championship to an opponent who is just too much and happens to be the better man. What he can't deal with, what he WON'T deal with is the crap that Lisa Benton pulled. All she had to do was sanction the damn match between Scabbia and himself. Carmichael doesn't know if Benton is trying to protect him or what but he wants to make it clear to her that he doesn't need protection. He didn't need it dealing with Quentin McDaniels or the Order or Butch Fleming. He sure as hell doesn't need protection from Salvatore Scabbia, a guy who won't take a piss without the say-so from Brooke. Carmichael expects Lisa Benton to rectify the situation because he's more than happy to rectify it his own way.

Cue Lisa Benton who walks onto the ramp with security. Lisa Benton tells Carmichael that the person he needs protection from is himself. Carmichael isn't any good to anybody busted up and broken and his stubborness is only going to make matters worse. So she will rectify the situation, starting by pointing out that Carmichael has no business being here because of doctor's orders. Second, these security guards are going to help rectifying the situation by escorting Carmichael out of the building and keeping him out of future buildings until further notice. Unfortunately for Noah Carmichael, this is one scenario where punching his way out of things isn't the way out. And with that, Noah shakes his head but decides to leave without a fuss.

Second Match: The Lady Liberties (Zoey Turner and Katie Frasier) vs. The Pacific Connection
I'm trying to squeeze all of the debuting people into this one show. Making the women's division stronger is certainly a worthwhile goal. The Pacific Connection are talented but at this point, they're the only team the newbies can beat without anyone making a fuss about them not being over enough. It's a strong showing for everyone and the Liberties hit Tamara with the Stars and Stripes to score the win in their debut. ***1/2, 75% overall.

Backstage, Vivian Merrick and The Future Foundation want to rip into Adam Hail and Simon Bennett. The new champions had better not be thinking that they're done with the Future Foundation. Rick and Julian are going to be back, more focused! More hungry! More dangerous! More vicious! Who do Hail and Bennett think they are? They think they can just show up one day out of the blue and demand everyone's attention? They were gone for a reason and the Future Foundation are more than willing and more than capable of sending them on another hiatus.

Back into the ring we go as Joey Osbourne is out there wanting to air some grievances. Why isn't his name being circulated as a possible contender for the Cruiserweight Title? He's sure of it that his name would have been pulled from Michael Hotbody's tumbler a few weeks ago but it was all ruined by Ozzy Mandias and Lisa Benton! They're afraid of Joey Osbourne and the impact that he'd make on the division and that's the truth! He'll show them and he'll showing everyone here watching! Give him anybody from the back and he'll take them on right now!

Cue some unfamiliar music, keeping with the theme of the night. We get what is apparently a new face coming down the aisle and joining Joey Osbourne in the ring. Joey seems flummoxed and asks just who the hell is this guy? The newbie introduces himself as Neil Quint and it was looking like he wasn't going to be able to make it onto the show after all but lo and behold, he saw Joey Osbourne having a temper tantrum and throwing out challenges so he figured why not come on out and make his debut? Osbourne doesn't take this seriously and claims that he was looking for a top guy to take on. Beating some rookie on their first night isn't what's going to grab the attention of the right people. Quint agrees but counters that him beating someone like Osbourne as his first match would do wonders for Quint. And with that Quint dropkicks Osbourne down. We get a ref in the ring and he calls for the bell!

Third Match: Neil Quint vs. Joey Osbourne
And here we go! Quite the night for the noobs, huh? Quint will be a guy to keep an eye on as his charisma puts him above the rest of the debuting crew. I wouldn't have to burden another manager. Anyway, this is all about making Quint look good in his debut so we've got ourselves a nice back-and-forth affair. Osbourne gets cocky but Quint KOs him by sending him face first into the turnbuckle. Osbourne is down and Quint comes off the top with The Quintessential Top Rope Manuever! Quint picks up the win in his debut! ****, 85% overall. Now THAT'S what I'm talking about.

The celebration is cut short as the video feed gets disrupted and we're shown some rather creepy imagery centered around some gothic looking woman and her raven. She identifies herself as Dusk as she pets the raven, who is apparently named Sorrow. She claims it's only appropriate as sorrow is what she intends to cast over the WWE.

Fourth Match: Jason Sorola and The Royal Effect vs. Shawn Dangerson and The Wyldhearts
Jason Sorola grabs the mic as he wants to thank Moses McKay and King Kavovit for doing what he himself had always hoped to accomplish but never could: end the group known as the Hunters. He admits that it was a momentous occasion to watch the group split but he wants us all to be honest: they were on the road to collapse the minute he left! He was the cornerstone of that group and when he dared to think for himself and go out on his own, it began a long downward spiral of ruin. And that's what's in store for Shawn Dangerson if he keeps getting in Sorola's way! So anyway this is a pretty boss match which is in no way designed to punish Robbie Greer for getting his dumbass suspended. Oh, look at that, Vivian Merrick distracts the ref while Sorola goes low on Greer and rolls him up for the cheap pin. I'm sure that was just a coincidence that Greer took the loss. Dangerson tries to get him some of Sorola but Sorola's got one of those pesky DoorDash alerts beckoning him away. *****, 95% overall.

Fifth Match: Leah vs. Lauren Franklyn
Nathan Quinn hopes that the Women's Tag Team Champions and the Southern Belles are watching and listening. Faith and Jenna should dismiss anything that Hannah and Bobbi Jo are probably trying to sell them. The champions made the declaration that they want to be defending their titles against the very best and unfortunately they're not going to find it in a pair of self-centered hicks. Hannah McCormick had her chance to be on the ride to the top but she felt like she didn't really need Nathan, at least not until she actually needed him! It's all going to work out for the best. Leah and Bonnie Beckham are going to continue being the team to beat and the Southern Belles can get to watch them become the new Women's Tag Team Champions! A solid match here. They even overcome the charisma deficit. Leah hotshots Lauren on the top rope and that sets up the Sultry Splash for the pin. ****1/2, 87% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Ozzy Mandias and Eddy Clash vs. Galino & Farnes w/Luscious
Luscious wants to ask an important question in regards to all of the hooplah surrounding Ozzy Mandias wanting a title shot against her boo, Michael Hotbody. What exactly has Ozzy even done to really be in consideration? Yeah, there was the match at Unforgiven but why was he even offered it to begin with? Are we missing some incredible win streak or monumental upset to where we were all supposed to go "Oh, man, that Ozzy Mandias! Hope he gets a title shot someday!"? Michael Hotbody's time is very precious and if he's not using it to be a fighter, he's most certainly using it to be a lover. So Luscious demands that Ozzy stop wasting Hotbody's time! Well with that tirade out of the way we get ourselves a boss tag team main event. Eddy plays the hot tag as he just destroys the heels. Farnes is all alone and Eddy tags Ozzy back in. Ozzy climbs onto the shoulders of Eddy and comes off with a Blizzard of Oz! That's enough for the pin and the victory! Afterwards, Hotbody and Zed Jones try their hand at getting them some of the faces but they're prepped for that and send them over the top rope. Zed is FURIOUS and wants another go but Luscious and Hotbody and the rest get him to back off...for legal reasons, no doubt. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Overall show rating: 83%

That episode had WWECW vibes, and I mean that in the kindest way. I loved when they'd debut loads of new faces in a single episode, added a fun element to the show and, actually, I thought WWECW was by far the most entertaining brand in 2008-09ish (not that Raw or SD were setting a high bar).

When you say Dell Killings' stats blow, do you mean actually blow or blow on the grading curve compared to the rest of the roster? He'd probably be one of the best wrestlers in the world by modern day EWR stat standards :lol:

I can only assume that the Lady Liberties are wrestling looking like American Maid from The Tick. I'd be all for it!

"Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver" for a guy named Quint :lol: That is absolutely fantastic.

SmackDown!: October 5, 2040

Opening Match: Neil Quint vs. Doug Michaels
Well we had such a good showing with Quint on Superstars so why not go for broke and try him out again? I've debuted so many new guys this year it's going to be tough deciding Rookie of the Year. Anyways, some quality shit here for the opener. Quint lays out Michaels with a floatover DDT and that sets up The Quintessential Top Rope Maneuver for the pin. ****1/4, 87% overall.

Wait a sec! We've got visual on Noah Carmichael making his way to a ringside seat! It looks like he's showing some more rebellion despite doctor's orders. His appearance most certainly has nothing to do with Salvatore Scabbia in the main event tonight, right? Surely he's going to just remain seated the whole show, right?

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He's proud to announce that despite the heinous actions from Ozzy Mandias, nothing is going to stop Hotbody from continuing to promote his awesome "EL DANDY FEARS HOTBODY" shirt! He proudly shows that he's wearing it and it's obvious that it's the same shirt Ozzy ripped off but just horribly stitched and taped together. Hotbody declares that everyone here in attendance will happy to know that the shirt will be available in sizes that are appropriate for what appears to be the average shirt size of this city. He calls Luscious to come on out to help model it and she does so wearing a hilariously oversized shirt. Hotbody admits that it might look big on someone like Luscious but it will most certainly be a snug fit for the kinds of ladies he sees here in the crowd. But he would appreciate the support regardless because he knows that El Dandy will give him a better match than any of the other dorks running around here demanding to face him for the Cruiserweight Title. Which brings him to why he's out here. Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle need to give things a rest! Now, he saw what went down at Unforgiven and he's outraged. HOW DARE JORDAN LAY HIS FILTHY HANDS ON THE GAVEL OF DOOM! That is personal property of Galino & Farnes and no one outside of those parameters is legally allowed to handle it! You can all be rest assured that SERIOUS INQUIRIES are being made into the whole situation and it'll most likely lead to even more legal trouble piled on to all of the other stuff Demiras and LaSalle have gotten themselves into. And on top of all that, Luscious was threatened with physical harm! Now, normally, Michael Hotbody would all over something like this, demanding that the offending party get their asses out to this ring so that he can teach a lesson about respecting a woman. He would be all about defending her honor by standing up to such bullying tactics LIKE A MAN....but, Luscious is a very forgiving person so all of that won't be necessary. Jordan and Martyn SHOULD CONSIDER THEMSELVES LUCKY!

Cue both Jordan and Martyn coming out and getting into the ring. Hotbody pulls Luscious in front of him and retreats to the corner as the two faces take a mic. Jordan does, indeed, feel lucky. He's lucky to be able to stand here and still compete despite getting his head bashed by a cage door by Michael Hotbody. Coming back from something like that is a sign that he's meant to be back here and he's meant to break Hotbody's sorry ass and take back the Cruiserweight Title. Martyn LaSalle also feels lucky. He dodged quite a bullet not getting hooked up with Luscious as it's quite the relief being able to pee without it burning. Luscious goes wide-eyed and open-mouthed at that bit and Hotbody yells at LaSalle, warning him to watch what he says. Luscious will forgive that, too, BUT SHE MIGHT NOT BE SO GENEROUS IF MARTYN KEEPS IT UP!

LaSalle points out that he's all out of concern over her feelings because he's dead set on making Hotbody suffer and taking the Cruiserweight Title away from him. Jordan tells Martyn to slow down just a bit because while he's fine with LaSalle getting to pound Hotbody's face into paste, the Cruiserweight Title is Jordan's to claim. Hotbody robbed him first. LaSalle agrees about that last bit but if Jordan could take the title back, he'd have done it already. Hotbody points out that this was the inevitable result of this silly alliance of theirs. They're better off just calling it quits and taking their frustrations elsewhere, preferably on each other because they both can't be Cruiserweight Champion. Both Jordan and Martyn turn their attention and glare to Hotbody and Jordan thanks Hotbody for reminding them to keep their eye on the prize. And with that, LaSalle and Demiras try to rush Hotbody but he's able to roll out of the ring, pulling Luscious with him, and bail. Demiras and LaSalle trade wary looks at each other.

Second Match: Leah vs. Jenna Kyle
Let's reignite this puppy. Or should I say "these puppies"? :naughty: You want your pants getting tight? This is your match right here. Hannah McCormick and Bobbi Jo eventually make their way out for a closer look. Leah and Jenna end up outside in front of the Southern Belles. Bobbi stands over them and gives them crap so they both shove her away. Hannah is OFFENDED at this and pulls Leah and Jenna down as they try climbing back into the ring, causing them to hit the apron on the way down. That's going to be a double DQ as Hannah continues to talk smack. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Third Match: Stone Walsh vs. Wrakk
Wrakk gets on the mic beforehand and wants to let everyone know that he's not mad about what went down on Raw. He's glad that Haven finally grew enough of his courage back to dare to try his hand at getting in Wrakk's business again. Wrong place and wrong time because ever since coming back, Wrakk has made it his mission to make this his most devastating and dominating run yet. Haven wants to try to spread fear? Wrakk IS fear! Haven wants to try to bring the violence? Wrakk IS the violence! He's more than willing to make SummerSlam look like a picnic if Haven has the stones. Strong words but it's backed up pretty well here in this match. Wrakk hits the Demon Cross for the pin after a hard-hitting affair. Afterwards we get the lights out treatment again and once again Haven is in the ring in front of Wrakk when they come back on. It's another brawl between these two hosses, BAH GAWD! *****, 95% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time, this time with Kyle Jacobs. Kyle wants to make it clear that he didn't come up with the stipulation nor the contract surrounding his match against Xavier Cross at Unforgiven. So if Cross wants to be upset with the outcome and the consequences of said outcome, well he's got no one to blame but himself. Nonetheless, Kyle's victory landed him the personal services of Xavier Cross and he's spent the last few days contemplating what that would entail. Kyle is a pretty self-sufficient kind of guy as he's already accomplished so much on his own; but he is open to change. It could be a refreshing experience, you never know. So with that said Kyle has himself a nice little list of things here that could use some doing that he really doesn't feel like doing himself. The only thing missing is a capable and subservient professional to handle it all so Xavier Cross, come on out!

Xavier Cross does, in fact, make his way out with little fanfare, decked out in an ill-fitting butler get-up, complete with dorky bowtie. It's obvious he's not enjoying this in the slightest. Kyle points out that poor outfit is clinging on for dear life. Well, he has to make due with what he's got. Things don't always go the way you want to, isn't that right? You could be the headliner of the biggest WrestleMania in recent history in one moment and the next you're getting laughed at by a crowd because you're dressed like some nerd on picture day at school. Anyways, this is going to work out well for the both of them. Cross is going to get some valuable experience in menial labor and Kyle will have some extra time on his hands so that he can focus even harder on climbing that mountain. Cross knows all about that mountain. Kyle just wants to experience the top of it himself and it's going to be great having Cross right behind him helping getting rid of all of the distractions, like the dry cleaners, curbside pick ups, driving, et cetera, et cetera. Cross will end up providing a valuable service to a young buck after all! So no time to start than the present, right? Tonight...WOAH, HOLD UP! Cross just clotheslines Kyle Jacobs down mid-sentence!!! I'd say that goes against proper servant behavior. Cross isn't done! He rips off a bunch of his attire and just proceeds to beat the living piss out of Jacobs. To the outside they go and Cross continues the ass whipping. Jacobs gets busted open with the steel steps. IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH! Cross hits Jacobs with the Cross Cutter ON THE STEPS!!! IT'S STILL NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!! Jacobs is in a bad way here as officials and paramedics try to get to him BUT CROSS WILL NOT BE DENIED! He wedges Kyle's arm between the steps and the ringpost AND CRUSHES IT! Cross spits on Kyle's flailing body as he takes his leave. Surely that's going to keep Kyle on the shelf for a bit, no? But what is Cross's deal?

Backstage, Sophie Waters meets up with Lisa Benton. Benton asks for Sophie to make this quick as she's got Kyle Jacobs to attend to, apparently. Sophie is curious as to what's going to go down as far as a number one contender for the Cruiserweight Title goes. Shawn Dangerson is still available and open to taking a crack at it. Benton assures Sophie that she already has a match in mind for No Mercy. However, she's not going to completely discount Shawn Dangerson. Here's the skinny: Next week, starting on Superstars, Shawn Dangerson will take on Jason Sorola in a best of five series. Whoever wins three matches in that series will get a shot at the title AFTER No Mercy. Sophie is down with that idea and she goes off to share the news.

Fourth Match: WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey vs. Sarah Moore
Naomi is without Eclypse and she wants to pine about it for a bit. She doesn't want to be on bad terms with Eclypse. She's still family, after all, no matter the circumstances surrounding the loss at Unforgiven. Eclypse is always welcome by Naomi's side and there's no need for hostilities. No one is really to blame, after all. Anyways, this match is awesome. Moore tries her best to stand toe-to-toe with the champ but it's not to be as she falls victim to the Bail Out and the champion gets the win. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Uh-oh. It looks like we've got more technical difficulties to deal with as the feed is interrupted and replaced with more from that Gothic chick, Dusk and her raven, Sorrow. More weird imagery here interspersed with shots of Jenna Kyle as Dusk talks about beauty. Beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder...but what about the beast? There's been enough beauty...time for a bit of ugliness. It'll do wonders for the soul....

Well, time for the main event as Salv...no, wait a sec. Here comes Ziggy Styles? He's most certainly not scheduled for anything right now. He grabs a mic and apologizes for popping up here unannounced but he had to jump on this opportunity to hold an impromptu edition of Gettin' Ziggy With It! Who should be the lucky guest this time around? Well, you sillies, it's the fine gentleman that's been seated over here in crowd in the front row the whole night: the FORMER WWE Unified World Champion, Noah Carmichael. Ziggy asks for Noah to greet the crowd. Noah merely glares a hole right through Ziggy as he puts more popcorn into his mouth. Ziggy continues as he says he wanted to go for the trifecta this week, getting the skinny on the biggest things that went down over the week and hosting it on his show. No doubt Noah is here to look at Salvatore Scabbia in the main event. Ziggy wants to know how Noah feels not being champion anymore. Noah continues his death stare and simply sips his drink. Ziggy is visibly nervous as he continues with his questions. Every fan is curious about Noah's mindset and they especially want to know, considering what went down at Unforgiven, if Noah realizes that even if the match had been sanctioned, Scabbia would've won anyway? This finally gets a reaction from Noah as he stands up, gives Ziggy another glare, and then turns to walk away. Ziggy is offended at this and grabs Noah's shoulder to stop him. Noah turns around in anger, spilling some of his drink on Ziggy. Ziggy is OUTRAGED at his shirt being ruined and shoves Noah. Well you can imagine what happens next. It's a brawl at ringside...well, more accurately Noah makes Ziggy his bitch as he hammers away as Ziggy's on his back trying to cover up. Cue security as they pull Carmichael off Ziggy and cuff him and start taking him out of the arena. Ziggy takes advantage of the...um, disadvantage Carmichael is in and boots him in the head before bailing. Carmichael really isn't making Lisa Benton's job any easier.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Unified Tag Team Champions The Collective (Adam Hail and Simon Bennett) vs. Salvatore Scabbia and Ronnie Costello w/Brooke
Yeah, I figure I should slap the champions with their name already. Brooke gets on the mic and claims that she's not here to throw shade on anyone but she hopes that her other clients, the Academy, are watching right now because Salvatore and Ronnie are going to handle the job that apparently couldn't get done on Raw. Bennett and Hail should consider this their REAL welcome to the new WWE. You see, Salvatore is the one who really got screwed when it comes to the Unified World Title and he's got several days worth of aggravation and violence saved up and he's ready to let someone have it. As far as Noah Carmichael goes, that bum got what he deserved, both on Raw AND here tonight. Scabbia will be more than happy to finish the job if Carmichael insists on having a death wish! The only other person that's equally infuriating as Carmichael is Lisa Benton! She had better come to a decision regarding the championship because as we've all seen, Scabbia's patience only goes so far. So as you'd imagine this match is designed to put Scabbia over as he's made to look good against the veterans. Ultimately it comes down to Bennett and Ronnie as the legal men as things break down. CARMICHAEL TRIES COMING OVER THE RAILING AGAIN! Did he really bust free from security? He wants to get him some of Scabbia and there are some words exchanged as security tries to once again pull Carmichael away. Sadly this leads to Ronnie being left alone and falling prey to the Bennett Lock for the tap out win. That's another reason to celebrate with their briefcases of cash. ****1/2, 88% overall.

Overall show rating: 87%

Dirty secret (or not?) confession time: I don't believe I ever watched a single minute of the new ECW under Vince's watch. I mean, I knew OF it but it's like Daria where, sure, students knew who she was but they weren't lining up to hang out with her. Kind of like me in high school. I heard mixed things about it with very few high points. Tiffany being one of them.

Well, you tell me....

https://i.imgur.com/1hwxQiz.png

I mean, maybe I'm just spoiled but I find little use for a guy like that.

Or Wonder Woman? :shifty: Props for making me remember The Tick, though. :lol:

https://comicvine1.cbsistatic.com/up...illyplasma.jpg

Yeah, the name just hit me when I was adjusting his profile. I figure it could be a thing for everything surrounding him. Like, his shirt could just say something like "The Quintessential T-Shirt" or what not. Like I said, I have some high hopes for him.

I love how even on my giant gaming monitor, Michael Hotbody's entire introduction takes up more than a full line. Pretty soon to read his intro the announcer will have to pull out a list the same size Jericho used when he wanted to read his 1,004 holds.

The matches were all greatness as per usual but the segment writing was just excellent. I popped for the Cross/Jacobs bit. Doing the butler gimmick and the butler has just CENA NUFF and goes off. And I popped for the arm in the steel chair spot, such a simple but effective way to do an injury angle. Now Jacobs can be a dick and pull a Bob Orton, using his cast for long after the injury heals.

Shit...that Quint marketing would be so good. He'd better be your top merch seller within a year!

The Tick was outstanding. I've always wanted to parody some of those characters in one of my games. Die Fledermaus is a superhero that doesn't want to be a superhero...Orange Cassidy is a pro wrestler that doesn't want to be a pro wrestler. It works!

OK if that American Maid outfit is the get up then I'm ALL IN :shifty: but yeah I suppose Wonder Woman is a more logical comparison :lol: anything that gets me Googling Gal Gadot pics is a win in my book. Weirdly my desk seems to be raising up at the very mention of her.

I will never tire of that 1,004 holds gag, even if Jericho has fallen out of favor with me. I'm sure I'll be able to dig up more nonsense for Hotbody to add on to the name to the point where it's an entire paragraph on your monitor. After all, we're approaching the 10-year anniversary of his incredible first place victory in the Fulton County Conga Championships. He will be the Man of a 1,000 Names.

Well in that Cross/Jacobs thing, Jacobs is the face so him doing the "douche about his injury" bit might not be the best approach. I might not have written that segment very well. The idea is that Cross is being the douche and wasn't going to honor the agreement because he's too proud and, well, he's a douche. I'll probably bring him back around for Survivor Series to blow the whole thing off and give some room for the new guys to breathe.

The Neil Quint marketing reminds me of the Spaceballs merchandise from the movie so that's why it struck a chord with me. It should probably be spelled The Quint-Essential T-Shirt/Socks/Cap/Wand Massager but there's room to tinker.

When I looked up pictures for American Maid all the memories of the absurdity of that show came flooding back to me. Like, who throws a shoe, honestly? I remember being a dumb kid not being able to wrap my head around Die Fledermaus's name, because, you know, I didn't understand German. I knew Mouse but didn't understand the rest so I was confused as to what he was actually supposed to be. That show was just all kinds of weird. I'm sure it had no adverse effects on us.

Gal Gadot is like the only thing the DCEU has going for itself on their side as far as the hotness goes. I mean, I love Amy Adams but she's kind of downplayed. There's always Margot Robbie's take on Harley Quinn but that look is kind of already played out which what a CERTAIN SOMEONE I KNOW can't wrap her head around. Anyways, my hopes for the Lady Liberties was going to be somewhat like a female Team Angle thing where they're a duo of college standouts but the American Maid/Wonder Woman thing is also pretty funny. I need to slap a manager with them, though. I'll try to work on Raw tomorrow as I'll have some extra time on my hands. That Sorola/Dangerson best of 5 series is hopefully going to lead to some good things.

Raw: October 8, 2040

We open with Lisa Benton who wants to address the WWE Unified World Title and its current status as vacant. She declares that there will be a one-on-one match as the main event of No Mercy to crown a champion. However the two participants will be determined in a series of Beat the Clock matches this week. The two competitors with the quickest times will face each other at No Mercy. The series starts tonight. Also, since Hannah McCormick is so eager to get involved with other people's affairs, she will be taking on Faith Connors tonight.

First Match: Ethan Lang vs. Ziggy Styles
Let's see how the newbie fares on a bigger stage. I say that despite Ziggy only being around about 2 months longer than Lang. Ziggy appreciates everyone who tuned in last week to all of his shows and got Ziggy with it. It's the beginning of a movement that will catapult him to the top of the talk of the town. He's going to continue his hot streak by showing this wet behind the years noob what for! It's a good outing, helped immensely by Ziggy's charisma as Ethan is a major downer in that department. Ultimately, Ziggy gets the duke by going to the eye, hitting the Thing-A-Ma-Zig, and using the tights for the pin. Michael Haywood runs down afterwards, no doubt in a rage over what happened last week on Ziggy's show and tries to get a piece but Ziggy is done for the night and decides to head out. ****1/4, 81% overall.

Second Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Xavier Cross vs. ???
Xavier Cross comes out smiling and he rips into the crowd. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I ruin things for all of you and poor Kyle Jacobs on SmackDown!? What did you all think was going to happen? I was going to be humiliated, week in and week out? I was going to just stand in the background or at the side of someone like Kyle Jacobs and just take orders or be the butt of whatever dumb joke he concocted for that particular night? I'm God damn Xavier FREAKING Cross! I main evented WrestleMania 50! I'm one of the longest reigning champions in history! My name is synonymous with 'you better respect his ass'! I am not here to be part of the amusement of a bunch of peons like all of you and certainly not Kyle Jacobs. So now he can lay in his bed, beaten and broken, and watch me as I continue to do what I do best. I'm going to win this Beat the Clock challenge by annihilating whoever it is Lisa Benton has lined up for me and there's not a damn thing Kyle Jacobs can do about it! Screw him and his dumb stipulation and SCREW ALL OF YOU! Now, where's my opponent?"

The lights go out almost on command and the music of Haven hits! Cross is a tad nervous to say the least. Well, here we go, I guess.

Second Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Xavier Cross vs. Haven
So we're looking to set the pace here as these are the first competitors. Cross, in fact, is not annihilating his opponent as predicted but it's an awesome start. Ref is bumped and they continue to brawl but here comes Wrakk to ruin the fun. He brawls with Haven as Cross is down and out. He eventually starts coming around as Wrakk tries taking Haven's head off with a chair. Haven blocks it and yanks it away and in his fury takes a swing at Wrakk but he ducks out of the way and rolls out of the ring causing Haven to hit Cross. The ref saw it though! He calls for the bell and that's a DQ win for Cross as he's got the time to beat for the rest of the competition. Haven rolls out of the ring and pursues Wrakk to the back looking for more. *****, 95% overall.

Backstage we hear from Sophie Waters hyping up Shawn Dangerson's involvement in the best-of-five series against Jason Sorola. She's hoping that this will put to rest all of the talk over who should be next in line for a shot at the Cruiserweight Title. Jason Sorola himself comes into the picture to run his mouth about the matter. He points out that Sophie and Shawn should mark this Thursday down on their calendar. It should serve as a reminder as to where it all started to unravel for the two of them. Their hopes and dreams and aspirations. Everything. It's going to be a short series, Jason claims, and it's going to put to rest who is the better man. Shawn Dangerson himself comes in to scare Jason away from Sophie. Jason merely smirks and walks away, telling the two that they deserve each other. They can console one another after this series blows up in their faces.

It's time for another edition of the Hot Button with everyone's favorite host, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody! He has Luscious with him along with a T-shirt cannon and he wants to talk about something very serious: "YOU PEOPLE AREN'T BUYING MY EL DANDY SHIRTS!!! Look, I know that you people might not have that much disposable income on hand. Hell, some of you are probably just lazy welfare queens who clothe yourselves with whatever you find at the Salvation Army. It's OK. I am a generous and giving Cruiserweight Champion. Just ask Luscious! Tell them Luscious..." *Luscious nods enthusiastically with a smile on her face* "...There! See? Now I'd love to give you all something tremendous, like, say, another Cruiserweight Championship match, but there really aren't any major contenders right now and I forgot my tumbler so we can't really do an impromptu thing. Plus, El Dandy still isn't returning my calls! Which brings us to why we're out here tonight. Out of the goodness of my heart AND AT MY OWN EXPENSE I have a few of my El Dandy T-shirts here that the lovely Luscious will fire out to you. Don't worry about them not fitting. They're all 4XL. They should be a perfect size for the majority of you. Now what we'd like for you all to do is to wear them proudly in public and raise awareness for what could possibly be the most legendary encounter in the history of the Cruiserweight Title: Michael Hotbody, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion taking on the Latin Lothario, El Dandy! You all want it, we want it, let's make El Dandy want it, too. So Luscious, let's lock and load, because I'm ready to blow!"

The music of Jordan Demiras interrupts the proceedings and the man himself makes his way out onto the stage. He glares at Hotbody and Luscious for a bit before raising his mic to mo...WAIT A SEC! The music of Martyn LaSalle interrupts Jordan's proceedings and he comes out and joins Jordan on the stage. LaSalle glares at everyone and declares that he's really not up for more verbal sparring. He has a good mind to just run down to that ring and find a real clever place to stick that T-shirt cannon. Jordan is taken back and doesn't appreciate Martyn interrupting things but he will admit he's on board with that idea regarding the cannon. Hotbody berates the two of them for showing up AGAIN with no business with Hotbody at all. They're just a bunch of killjoys who want everyone to be as miserable as they are but there's nothing either one of them can do to bring down the mood here. While this is going on, Ozzy Mandias sneaks into the ring behind Hotbody and Luscious and gives them a glare. Luscious is the first to notice as she turns around and freaks out, dropping the cannon before bailing. Ozzy picks it up. Hotbody turns to find Ozzy as well and follows Luscious's example. However, they're path up the ramp is blocked by the approaching Demiras and LaSalle. Cue Lisa Benton coming out to the stage to try to calm things down. She tells Ozzy, Jordan, and Martyn that their anger is understood and justified but there's an order to these things. Hotbody demands that Lisa do something about the three of them because he's already dealt with Jordan and Martyn and Ozzy is screwed anyway because he didn't get the win at Unforgiven so he has no business asking for a one-on-one shot at the Cruiserweight Title.

Lisa finds a measure of truth in what Hotbody is saying but she wants Hotbody to clarify something before she proceeds. "Are you basically saying that it was the team that got the win at Unforgiven?" Hotbody nods and says, "Yes. That's exactly what happened! So Ozzy Mandias doesn't get his match with me! Fair's fair!"

Lisa continues and declares that in that case, the whole team should get rewarded! So here's what's going to happen at No Mercy: the Cruiserweight Championship match will feature Michael Hotbody defending the title against Jordan Demiras, Martyn LaSalle, AND Ozzy Mandias in a Four Way Elimination Match! Hotbody and Luscious lose their shit and throw a tantrum. Lisa orders everyone to leave and to not lay a hand on one another as she's not looking forward to deal with another night of chaos. Hotbody yells at Ozzy who is still in the ring holding the T-shirt cannon and taunts him...so Ozzy pulls the trigger and fires a shirt into Hotbody's crotch. Ozzy plays innocent to the crowd, gesturing that the thing went off on its own. Plus, he didn't lay on a finger on Hotbody. Luscious is DISTRAUGHT as Hotbody rolls around in pain.

Third Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Chris Collins vs. Alexander Piero
Chris Collins gets on the mic to clarify something. His opponent tonight is certainly an odd choice, considering the prize at stake and the fact that Piero hasn't really done anything to warrant being involved in this particular picture. However, Chris admits that he specifically requested Piero to be his opponent so that Piero can get whatever fury he's still got bottled up inside of him out of his system and so that Chris can snuff out that sad little upstart once and for all. Piero is going to learn ruthlessness first hand and that risking your health for some broad is never a good idea! Better to rip off the bandage now and learn you have no place at this table than to delude yourself any further. Well Piero certainly has something to say about all of that. It's an even match, surprisingly, as Collins struggles to keep the rookie down. Ultimately it's a double countout as Piero decides that beating the piss out of Collins is apparently more important. Looks like both of these guys are out of contention. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Fourth Match: Hannah McCormick vs. Faith Connors
Hannah hopes that Faith hasn't forgotten about her and her aspirations to rid the WWE of the low-brow, unwashed mediocrity that Faith and Jenna bring to the table. She and Bobbi Jo will be more than happy to be the ones to take those Women's Tag Team Titles as a well-deserved reward for finally knocking the Lonely Girls off their pedestal that all of these dumb drooling mouth-breathers built for them! So, yeah, this is some good shit as you'd expect. We see clips of Leah and Bonnie Beckham in the back watching the proceedings. Ultimately, Bobbi Jo tries some shenanigans to help Hannah but Jenna is there to chase her. The ref is distracted by this and Bobbi manages to slip Hannah her custom mic. Faith has no idea about this and goes for the Mirror's Edge but Hannah introduces the mic into Faith's face as she comes off the top. Faith is out of it and Hannah goes for a roll-up and uses the ropes for the pin. She calls for Bobbi to join her in retreat. *****, 96% overall.

Backstage we see Lisa Benton having to deal with more fuss from Noah Carmichael who is apparently isn't supposed to be here. Security stands in his way and try to get him out of the arena as Noah yells that he's still not done with Salvatore Scabbia. Almost on cue, Scabbia and company pass by Noah and taunt him. We get more yelling and chaos...

...WAIT! The feed gets interrupted and we get another video from Dusk and her raven, Sorrow. This one centers around Faith Connors as Dusk provides a monologue. "What does it mean to fly? What does it mean to grace the air and soar with beauty and poetry? It means accepting the possibity of crashing...and burning."

Fifth Match: Salvatore Scabbia, Ronnie Costello, The Academy vs. The Wyldhearts and The Dillingers
Well, back to the program, I suppose. Brooke mocks Noah Carmichael's sad and pathetic state of existence right now. All it took was one encounter with Salvatore Scabbia and he's become no better than a vagrant or a rambling old man shaking his fist at the clouds. No, Noah is, in fact, most certainly done with Salvatore Scabbia, but Scabbia is not done with the Unified World Title. This is a wild affair to say the least. And I'm most certainly not continuing to punish Robbie Greer for getting sus...oops, would you look at that? Robbie Greer gets locked in Scabbia's Omerta and passes out giving the win to the heels. Who'd have thunk it? ****1/2, 90% overall.

Sixth Match: Eclypse vs. Phoebe Hanson
I haven't offically done a face turn for Eclypse so she gets a face opponent for right now. Plus, Phoebe also needs some Robbie Greer-style punishm...er, I mean, hey, look at Phoebe do her damndest to put Eclypse over! Eclypse hits the Fade to Black after an awesome outing to score the pin.

Afterwards, WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey comes down to try to appeal to Eclypse. She tells Eclypse face-to-face that there shouldn't be any hard feelings between them, despite what went down at Unforgiven. Naomi hopes that things can remain strong between them because family is what really matters in the overall scheme of things. Naomi offers a handshake...but Eclypse shakes her head! Naomi looks nervous. Eclypse hugs Naomi instead! Naomi is grateful for that and is glad that Eclypse wants to move forward. Eclypse takes the mic and agrees that looking forward is important and that it's also important to look after family and not bear any ill-will towards one another...and that's why Eclypse expects Naomi to grant her a title match. Naomi's eyes go "deer-in-the-headlights" as Eclypse makes this request and drops the mic, taking her leave. *****, 95% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Beat the Clock Challenge: Quentin McDaniels vs. Kerry Cemenko
These guys had quite the showing on the pre-show for Unforgiven. Kerry wants to make it clear that his nuts are out for revenge! Silliness aside, these guys rock it again. Quentin tries for the brass knuckles again but they get stolen from him by Kerry. Kerry threatens to use them and the ref tries to talk some sense into him. Quentin goes to the eye as Kerry is involved with the ref and manages to hit the Great Depression to score the pin. Both Quentin and Xavier Cross have set the times to beat. How will this play out as the week unfolds? *****, 94% overall.

Overall Show Rating: 91%

Man, that took me a while to get around to, but you know how it is with certain distractions...:shifty:

I’m sure those were some pretty luscious distractions!!!

Beat the Clock is one of those gimmicks that makes for a really nice show structure to follow throughout the episode. One thing WWE did that I hated was never had any sort of provision for what happens if someone loses their match. Yeah they don’t beat the clock but shit, why doesn’t the opponent take their spot? It would give them a little more incentive in it.

So I like the idea of not only is this challenge open for anyone to possibly get a chance, but there are two winners coming out of it as well. That adds for a fun little twist on the format.

Oh man, Hotbody finally being forced to face everyone in a fatal four way. Three feuds all culminating in one big match where he might finally be forced to get his comeuppance. If I were booking I would probably recognize that, as great as Hotbody is, this fatal four way can be a cathartic moment for everyone. Imagine if the match starts and it’s just a solid five minutes of Hotbody eating everyone’s finishers. He gets eliminated first and there’s this “oh shit” moment of knowing a new champ will be crowned, and the moment can soak in.

But I’m sure Hotbody can then have his legal team research the conspiracy that the company has very blatantly been plotting against him!

Also whoever wins needs to really face El Dandy. El Dandy is the fireworks factory the world has been waiting for!

Definitely imagining Dusk’s gothy vibe. Kinda like AEW wrestler Abadon without the horrifying makeup and face paint.

https://i.redd.it/2nwl0ez0gep51.jpg

Superstars: October 11, 2040

Once again we're opening with Lisa Benton and she's looking exasperated to say the least. She informs us that the Beat the Clock challenge continues tonight with three more matches where everyone will be attempting to do better than the times set by Xavier Cross and Quentin McDaniels on Raw. She also has one major piece of business that she would rather get out of the way right now instead of running the risk of things getting even worse later. She knows Noah Carmichael is here and rather than deal with more chaos she's asking him to come out here right now to speak with her. Time passes for a bit with no response until Carmichael eventually makes his way out being escorted by security. He wants to know what the hell is up and that it had better be good. Benton counters that he's got no other recourse if he wants to be in the arena and it's not like he has anything better to do. Carmichael says that's fair enough and for her to fire away. Benton understands the frustration Carmichael has been feeling but a line has to be drawn somewhere. There's been pressure being breathed down her neck these past few weeks to just cut the losses and let Carmichael go. Some people have suggested merely a suspension. But that really won't help matters, will it? Carmichael will just continue raising hell and trying to get at Salvatore Scabbia no matter what, right? Well, Lisa has managed to come up with a measure of a compromise that will hopefully settle things for all parties. Now, Carmichael's doctor isn't sure when he can be cleared medically so that's something Carmichael is going to have to consider when thinking about this offer. Lisa produces a document and a pen and hands them to Carmichael. Lisa tells Carmichael that what he's holding is a waiver. He is welcome to sign it, thereby earning permission to compete; however, in doing so, Carmichael will absolve the WWE of any medical responsibility should anything happen to him during said competition. Lisa tells Carmichael that this is the middle ground and hopes he makes the right decision for himself because she's not looking forward to utilizing more drastic measures.

Carmichael looks over the document intently as he ponders his options. He takes the mic and tell Lisa that waiver or no waiver, permission or no permission, Salvatore Scabbia is going to find a boot in his ass one way or another. He'll sign the document because he has a clean conscience. Will she be able to say the same? With that said, he signs the waiver and hands it back to Lisa and takes his leave. How soon will we see Carmichael back in action?

Backstage we join Luscious along with Galino & Farnes as they're all EXTREMELY UPSET over what happened to poor Michael Hotbody on Raw. Hotbody was the victim of AN ALL OUT ASSAULT! Ozzy Mandias may claim innocence but everyone knows the truth! And even if he wasn't lying and there was indeed something wrong with the T-shirt cannon, well then the manufacturers of said cannon will be facing SERIOUS INQUIRIES about their faulty products! Luscious talks about the poor stress and pain Hotbody has been feeling at the point of impact. She's been working tirelessly and diligently these past few days to relieve the pain in order for Hotbody to be back in form and in fighting shape so he can get his revenge on everyone that's wronged him these last few weeks. Demiras. LaSalle. And ESPECIALLY Ozzy Mandias! He ruined things for her and Hotbody for the last few nights with what he did! The three of them had better be prepared to have their night ruined at No Mercy when Hotbody manages to remain the Cruiserweight Champion!

First Match: The Perfections vs. The Lady Liberties
I'm kind of tossing the newbies into the deep end with this match. Nathan Quinn gets on the mic and points out how his girls were watching the proceedings on Raw and they're not too impressed with what they've been seeing. It certainly goes without saying in regards to the Lonely Girls but Hannah McCormick and Bobbi Jo can't seriously be thinking of being the number one contenders to the Women's Tag Titles with an outing like that. He hopes they're watching right now because he's got the team with the skills and the fortitude to dethrone the champions. A solid back-and-forth affair here as I want to get the newbies looking good. Bonnie Beckham gets the clean duke here after hitting Katie with the Bluebonnet for the pin. ****1/4, 84% overall. About what I expected.

Second Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Eddy Clash vs. Orlando Kincaid
The second fastest time is really all that needs to be beat. Eddy controls with some good power stuff while Kincaid uses his experience to hang in there. We're reaching the time limit and Zed Jones decides to make himself known by walking out to ringside. Kincaid can't quite get the OK Corral on Clash and it gets countered into the Thunderstrike but Eddy gets distracted by Zed climbing up onto the apron. He goes after Zed and issues some threats but the bell rings as neither time was beat and we have ourselves a draw. Eddy chases after Zed in anger. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Uh-oh...more interrupting from that Dusk chick and her raven. This video follows the same format as the others but this time shots of Eclypse are used as Dusk makes another speech. "Light and darkness. Neither can exist without the other. And while there may be safety and comfort in the beckoning of the light, the darkness is always there. Ready to snatch you back."

Third Match: WWE Women's Champion Naomi Bailey vs. Lzzy Ryd
Naomi gets on the mic and says she wants to talk about what we all saw with that video. She saw that crazy Dusk chick apparently talking about Eclypse. Well Naomi is going to take those words as a threat and no one threatens Naomi's family! See, things are certainly strained between herself and Eclypse but they will always have each others' back because that's what you're supposed to do with family. You don't listen to any outsiders trying to stir things up. Naomi cares deeply for the well-being for Eclypse and that is why she can't give her the title match that she asked for on Raw. If there are threats on the horizon then now more than ever, she and Eclypse need to be sticking together and not being selfish about things. No doubt, with a little perspective, Eclypse will understand and come to her senses and realize that the two of them need each other. So anyways, this is a kick ass match. Naomi is top form here and manages to get the duke after hitting the Bail Out for the pin. No sign of Eclypse. Wonder what she'll have to say about all of this. *****, 94% overall.

Fourth Match: Best of 5 Series - Match 1: Jason Sorola vs. Shawn Dangerson
Dangerson ducks a clothesline from Sorola and gets a quick roll-up for the pin. Dangerson leaves and Sophie mocks an irate Sorola by gesturing "1-0". 4 matches to go.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time as we're joined by Paul Andrews. He regrets to inform us that his clients, the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions Adam Hail and Simon Bennett, are not here tonight. Being one of the champions calls for a lot of responsibilities outside of this ring along with the challenges inside of it. But it's OK because they are two veterans who have handled that big time pressure before and they're happy to be back to show some of these new faces how it's done. They'll be back soon enough because they're eager to get back into the thick of things. Being gone these past few years can really work up an appetite and get that itch going.

Cue Moses McKay and King Kavovit, The Royal Effect, making their way out here and joining Andrews in the ring. McKay says that there are indeed a lot of challenges for Hail and Bennett to face in this ring. If they've got that itch that Andrews is talking about so bad, well the Royal Effect are more than happy to scratch it. The Royal Effect don't need those two has-beens to show them "how it's done". They've been getting it done just fine with no one showing them the ropes. What is it with people coming back to the WWE and thinking that it's the same as the way they left it? The Royal Effect are the new hotness of the tag team division no matter what. In fact, they take great offense at the way Paul Andrews stole the spotlight weeks ago in the gauntlet. Hail and Bennett don't deserve the titles and the Royal Effect are eager to prove it, if they're willing to get off their asses and actually show up for a fight. Andrews tells the Royal Effect that he gets where they're coming from. It has to be frustrating to be shown up. Of course, if the Royal Effect were indeed all that, then wouldn't they have already been the tag team champions? Kavovit and McKay are taken back by this and Kavovit responds with anger that the two of them have been busy with other matters. They had to obliterate the Play Pals and make them history. In fact, it kind of went something like this! And with that, the Royal Effect begin to beat the living piss out of Andrews. They leave him laying and McKay tells him to send that message to his boys.

Fifth Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Ryan Pattillo vs. Lonny Richards
Cross and McDaniels still have the times to beat. A strong outing here as Pattillo shows some fire, eager to get back into the thick of things at the top of the card. He hits the Shutdown on Richards and gets the pin, beating Xavier Cross's time but not the time set by McDaniels. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Sixth Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: WWE Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp vs. Ronnie Costello
The final Beat the Clock for the night as it's set to conclude on SmackDown! Seth Von Kamp gets on the mic and asks Brooke what will happen if both Ronnie AND Salvatore Scabbia end up with the best times. Brooke tells him to mind his own business. She's a manager of champions, no matter what, and she'll have the Unified World Title because its where it belongs! Pretty good outing here. Ronnie has things well in hand but Justin Mitchell tries his hand at helping out. Brooke waves him off as she doesn't want to run the risk of him screwing things up. This causes an argument that draws the attention of Ronnie as he's pulling Seth up and Seth takes the opportunity to hit the Collapse of Society for the pin, beating the time of Quentin McDaniels BY ONE SECOND! So far, Quentin and Seth have the best times. What will SmackDown! have in store for us? ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Alexander Piero and the Wyldhearts vs. Chris Collins and The Future Foundation
Might as well end strong with a loaded main event. Collins continues to mock Piero's misfortune in regards to Madison's injury. It's nothing but goodness that ends with BONZO GONZO and Piero ends up alone with Julian. Vivian tries running distraction but the Wyldhearts pull her off. Piero hits the Flashpoint and scores the pin. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Overall show rating: 87%

I always loved the idea of making someone sign a waiver to compete. Makes someone seem that much more hellbent to get their match or get their revenge on their challenger. Also even with a babyface authority figure it's still the appropriate amount of smarm...us HR folks are always putting the company first.

Another thing that pops be about Hotbody promos is I can always tell when he's EXTREMELY UPSET and can imagine everyone in the promo HEAVILY EMPHASIZING certain points.

Beat the Clock matches are especially perfect for distraction finishes, doing juuuust enough to fuck the face over without them actually having to take a loss or anything.

:lol: the first match of a best of 5 being a super quick flash pin. I love that.

Poor Pattillo gets himself a big win to re-establish himself but doesn't get to enjoy the victory for very long before SVK swiped the time mark away. if this leads to Pattillo vs. SVK at some point that could be money.

BONZO GONZO is a fantastic finisher name. Modern day WWE would include hokey graphics that pop on the screen when it happens, ala the old Batman cartoons.

SmackDown!: October 12, 2040

Opening Match: Best of 5 Series - Match 2: Shawn Dangerson vs. Jason Sorola
Dangerson is up by one in the series thanks to that surprise roll-up win last night. Sorola gets on the mic and asks if Dangerson is actually going to be a man tonight or if he's going to take the coward's way out again. Sorola came for a fight because he's the only person on the roster deserving of that Cruiserweight title. Sophie defends her client by pointing out that this is a series that going to go at least three matches. Shawn Dangerson was just trying to pace himself for the long run. Sorola counters by suggesting Shawn had better be ready for the long haul because these are going to be the longest nights of his life. So we don't get a quick match like last night but instead it's a fucking awesome opener. The ratings are certainly reflective of that. Anyways, Sorola tries a superplex on Dangerson but Shawn shoves him off. Dangerson comes off the top and lands on Sorola's shoulders and flows right into a victory roll for the pin and to go up 2-0 in this series. Sorola once again loses his shit after the match. He may be close to rupturing a vein. Next match is on Raw. *****, 95% overall.

Second Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Wrakk vs. Mathias
Seth Von Kamp and Quentin McDaniels have the times to beat with Seth having the better time by one second. So this is a battle of heavyweights. Paul Andrews, sadly, is not with Mathias here as a result of what happened last night with the Royal Effect. Wrakk is just too much here and he hits the Demon Cross for the pin with a time that ties with Seth Von Kamp's! That puts Quentin McDaniels out of the running. Haven shows up out of nowhere for fun and Wrakk decides that he's had enough for the night. ****1/2, 92% overall.

Uh-oh...another video from that Dusk chick. There's nothing left that can hold back the darkness, she claims. Apparently she's showing up here tonight!

Backstage, Lisa Benton is on the phone, apparently with her superiors. She sounds like she's discussing the arrangement made with Noah Carmichael. Ziggy Styles decides to make himself known and tries to get her off the phone. Lisa finally tells the people on the other line that she'll have to call them back and gets in Ziggy's face demanding to know what the hell he wants. Ziggy wants to know if she's given any consideration to what he proposed to her. He's ready to participate in the Beat the Clock challenge tonight as the people of the WWE deserve a Unified World Champion that's all about the pizazz and glamour. The people have been clamoring for a champion that they can get Ziggy with! He knows that he can get the best time. He just needs a chance. Lisa sighs in response and says that she was going to leave Ziggy out of the running; but she just thought of the perfect opponent for him for tonight. Ziggy will get his wish so he should probably go prepare. Ziggy leaps with joy, telling Lisa that she won't regret this. Lisa agrees, saying she doubts that she will.

Third Match: The Royal Effect vs. The Tokyo Titans
Moses McKay gets on the mic to brag about how Paul Andrews and his clients, the Unified Tag Team Champions, aren't here tonight. He hopes that while looking over the body of Andrews, both Adam Hail and Simon Bennett got the message loud and clear. The Royal Effect are most dangerous team in the WWE. They destroyed the Play Pals. They annihilated Paul Andrews. There's only one more piece that needs to be put in place and that is the Unified Tag Team Championship. Bennett and Hail came back at the worst possible time and if they want to believe otherwise, they can take another look at Paul Andrews and try to tell the Royal Effect different. So this is a bad ass match. It's mainly to put the Royal Effect over but it still rocks, nonetheless. Wu finds himself alone with McKay and falls victim to the Mass Effect and the Royal Effect gets the victory. Both McKay and Kavovit make motions signaling they want the belts around their waists. *****, 95% overall.

Elsewhere backstage, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody is with Luscious and they're here to vent their grievances over what's been happening to him. Hotbody struggles to talk as he grasps his crotch. The two of them are furious with Ozzy Mandias. Ozzy's little stunt on Raw has made it difficult, if not impossible, for Hotbody to partake in one of his favorite workouts. He needs his entire body working and firing on all cylinders in order for him to be the powerhouse champion that he is and Ozzy Mandias ruined it OUT OF JEALOUSY! Michael Hotbody is a bigger man than Ozzy Mandias in every department and it's a shame that Ozzy, along with Jordan Demiras and Martyn LaSalle, won't get a chance to try to prove otherwise because Hotbody's CRACK LEGAL TEAM is working on a method to ensure that the ridiculous Fatal Four-Way elimination match at No Mercy proposed by Lisa Benton WON'T HAPPEN! There is zero reason for the match and is just another example of Lisa Benton overstepping her boundaries! None of his opponents deserve a shot and if you don't believe him, just watch all three of them embarrass themselves in the main event tonight!

Fourth Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Salvatore Scabbia vs. Clubber Harris
Brooke gets on the mic and wants to complain about two major things. Ronnie Costello got screwed out of his chance in regards to the Beat the Clock challenge and Salvatore Scabbia shouldn't even have to participate in this nonsense! Everyone witnessed Salvatore Scabbia beating Noah Carmichael at Unforgiven fair and square. Scabbia continues to get punished for merely doing the right thing and being the best at his job. While Scabbia is more than happy to crush more victims, he's got his limits and someone is going to end up on the wrong end of it. This is a hard-hitting affair as these are some hosses. Harris looks like he's got things in hand but Brooke runs distraction and Scabbia is able to counter and lock in the Omerta until Harris passes out, beating the time set by Seth Von Kamp and Wrakk. So far it's technically 3 guys in the running. ****1/2, 91% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time! The lights go out and a weird voice plays over the system reading some of "The Raven" before we get some awesome gothic music heralding the arrival of Dusk! She's got Sorrow with her as she makes her way to the ring. She asks for silence from the crowd as she says that the quiet helps her think. In fact, if everyone were to quiet themselves and get lost in the void, truly listening, they would be amazed at what they would learn. They would learn about the changing of the landscape that is on the horizon now that Dusk has arrived because they'd be able to feel it, deep within their bones. Dusk stands here as the abyss that welcomes the gaze of those brave enough to set a foot forward. Let them cast their stone; all that will be waiting for them and all that they shall gain in return...is sorrow.

Cue the music of Eclypse and no doubt it's a toss up for the crowd as to who's the creepiest. They seem to be on the side of Eclypse, though, as she makes her way to the ring to confront Dusk. She tries getting as close as possible but Sorrow lets out a shriek as a form of warning to stay back. Eclypse warns Dusk to watch her bird before it gets fed to some stray cat outside of the arena. Dusk claims that Sorrow isn't much to worry about...unless you're inviting. Eclypse thinks that Dusk isn't much to worry about either. A few videos, a Hot Topic get-up, and a screeching bird isn't enough to get Eclypse shaking in her boots. Eclypse used to do voodoo so rest assured that she's done some much crazier crap than Dusk can ever dream of. Eclypse is a former Women's Champion, too, and was on the cusp of being the first to hold the Women's Tag Team Titles and is on her way to recapturing that Women's Title so Dusk has got a lot to learn before trying to bring it to this division.

Dusk glares back as she responds. "Getting ahead of yourself; a true sign of the arrogant. Your affairs don't quite seem in order but you attempt to stand so defiant. A recipe for disaster to say the least. To think I might have considered you an ally, a fellow daughter of darkness. Imagine one black hole casting all in its path into oblivion; but I can see through this façade."

"There's only black hole and it's your mouth. Tell you what, I could use the warm-up before I go tackling Naomi for that Women's Title. If you've got enough guts to crawl your way out of whatever pit you call home again, show up on Raw this Monday and we'll see who's the real daughter of darkness."

Dusk forces a weak smile and accepts the challenge. "Understand, though, that I mean what I say. Enjoy a taste of Sorrow." That's apparently a command as almost on cue, Sorrow flies from Dusk's shoulder and gets in the face of Eclypse. Dusk gets out of the ring and retreats back up the aisle and Sorrow flies back to her arm. Eclypse looks a bit shaken up but otherwise fine as she glares at Dusk.

Fifth Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Ziggy Styles vs. ???
Ziggy comes out full of joy and pep in his step. He wants us all to know that he realizes the task ahead of him. There are some impressive times set so far and this is the last match in the entire Beat the Clock series. But part of being able to get Ziggy with it is being able to rise to the challenge. You plant your feet in the ground, you stand firm, you look at what's in your way, and then you show it what for! He's extra excited because he knows that Lisa Benton has picked out a great opponent for him. He apologizes in advance for what's about to happen but there's too much on the line and the Unified World Title is ripe for the pickings. All that's required is the person who wants it the most! Now let's see who Lisa Benton picked out....

Fifth Match: Beat the Clock Challenge: Ziggy Styles vs. Noah Carmichael
Ziggy understandably shits the proverbial brick as Carmichael comes out. It's more of a slaughter than a match as Ziggy does his best to weather the storm. Ziggy tries bailing but HERE COMES MICHAEL HAYWOOD! Ziggy backs up into the ring to try to distance himself from Haywood but he walks right into the Quick Draw from Carmichael and that's enough to give Carmichael the pin and the victory, beating the times set by Wrakk and Seth Von Kamp but not Scabbia's. Regardless, that's enough to make the main event for No Mercy Noah Carmichael vs. Salvatore Scabbia. Haywood gets a little bit of Ziggy before Ziggy's able to shove him off and run away. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Sixth Match: WWE Women's Tag Team Champions The Lonely Girls vs. The Perfections
Faith and Jenna inform us that a decision will be made regarding their next defense on Raw by Lisa Benton. They don't know if they'll be facing The Perfections or the Southern Belles or even some other team but the reality is they're the first champions for a reason. Nathan Quinn counters by claiming Faith and Jenna made the wrong decision spurning him and it's going to end up biting them in the ass one way or another. He's backing the right pair of horses and it's only a matter of time before the belts come to his camp. This match rocks as you'd expect. The Southern Belles are so entranced by how much this match rocks that they come out to ringside to really enjoy it. They try hopping up on the apron to talk trash but the ref tries backing them off. Both Leah and Jenna decide they don't feel like dealing with the Southern Belles and they dive out onto both of them. There's a brawl on the floor and the ref calls for a double DQ. It's a three-way fight between all of the teams as we go to break! ****1/2, 92% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Zed Jones and Galino & Farnes vs. Ozzy Mandias, Jordan Demiras, and Martyn LaSalle
Two shows ending with a multi-man match? What is this? It's a wild affair to say the least. Michael Hotbody makes a nuisance of himself throughout. Things start to break down and EDDY CLASH COMES DOWN! He stalks Hotbody and Luscious to the point where they bail. Zed Jones excuses himself from the match to try to intercept Clash. This leaves Galino & Farnes alone in a 3-on-2 situation. LaSalle locks in the Martynizer on Farnes while Jordan Demiras hits Galino with an Axe Kick and Ozzy adds the cherry on top with the Blizzard of Oz for the pin on Galino. The three contenders stand tall but what did Hotbody mean with what he talking about earlier? ****1/2, 90% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%

Dusk was the MVP of this episode I think. Just a super cool gimmick, and a good way to debut her against another creepy chick.

It'd be like if Abyss had joined WWE in like 2005. Everyone would've just been waiting for him to feud with Kane so dammit, let's get to it right out of the jump.

Ziggy is the perfect foil to be in that last Beat the Clock match, getting dropped by Carmichael with haste and giving us all the logical title match to continue on with that story. Plus the Clock matches allowed all sorts of other stories to carry over.

I dig ending with a trios match, it's an NJPW staple to carry a lot of feuds through in a multi-man tag. Hotbody trying to plant the seeds that the three challengers are not to be trusted, and Benton continues to make UNWIELDY decisions.

Raw: October 15, 2040

We open with the Intercontinental Champion Seth Von Kamp joining us in the ring. He's not going to lie to us, he's been stewing in disappointment since SmackDown!. It looked for all the world that he was on his way to the main event at No Mercy and getting a chance at the Unified World Title. It'd have been quite the cherry on top of what's been a pretty cool year for him. Imagine how it would have been being able to walk out of No Mercy with the Unified World Title AND the Intercontinental Championship. Well, he'll have to be content with his Intercontinental Title in the meantime but he'll be watching the World Title match between Scabbia and Carmichael intently because he's not letting Beat the Clock get him down.

Cue Ryan Pattillo. The former leader of the Hunters makes his way out to the stage and begins to address Seth. Ryan says that he was also looking forward to that main event match for the title. It's been a loooong time since some gold has been around his waist and unfortunately he had to watch four different people beat his time; one of them being the man he's looking at right now. The two of them both worked their asses off for the victories they had in the challenge but Seth is the only one between the two that still has something to show for themselves. Pattillo thinks that Seth owes him something for his troubles.

Seth gets back on the mic and asks for Pattillo to stop beating around the bush and get to the point. Pattillo capitulates and asks how Seth would feel about being the main event for tonight, by giving him a shot at the Intercontinental Championship. Seth isn't so sure Pattillo really deserves a shot but the truth of the matter is that he didn't have anything lined up for tonight anyways. "You're on, Pattillo!" he proclaims. Looks like we've got our main event.

We go to a pre-recorded interview from Paul Andrews as he wants to address the Royal Effect. He's been spending these last few days discussing things with Adam Hail and Simon Bennett. He admits that he's partly making this decision for personal reasons but his clients are completely on board with him. If the Royal Effect want a piece of the champions, all they have to do is show up at No Mercy and they can have all they can handle. Hail and Bennett have agreed to defend the title...but that's secondary to smacking down the Royal Effect for what they did.

First Match: Best of 5 Series - Match 3: Shawn Dangerson vs. Jason Sorola
So Sorola needs the win here to stay alive as Dangerson is up 2-0. He looks like he's on the verge of a meltdown as this whole situation with Dangerson has no doubt taken a toll on his mental health. Sorola tries a quick roll-up of his own but that goes nowhere as the match goes on to be another boss encounter between these two. Sorola is more aggressive, probably the most aggressive he's ever been but Dangerson just refuses to go away. They end up outside and Sorola tries to move in on Dangerson but Dangerson kicks him off sending him face-first into the ringpost, busting Sorola open. The sight of his blood is apparently enough to send Sorola off the deep end and he grabs a chair and destroys Dangerson with it, causing a disqualification. That puts Dangerson at 3-0 making it a clean sweep! But that just infuriates Sorola even more and he decides to go to town on poor Dangerson. It's just utter brutality unleashed by Sorola and he leaves Dangerson a quivering pile of bloody jelly. Sophie Waters can only watch in horror as finally some officials and paramedics come down to try to put an end to things. Sorola has lost his marbles. But what of Dangerson? He's won the number one contendership but at what cost? *****, 95% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Wrakk! He's not particularly happy about having to sit on his ass and being out of the main event for No Mercy. He does take a small comfort in knowing Haven is in the same boat. It is a bit annoying that the two of them have been locked in a stalemate of sorts. Maybe if he hadn't been gone for a year, Wrakk would've been able to demolish Haven a long time ago and wouldn't have to be dealing with his crap now. Wrakk is patient, however. No matter the outcome of No Mercy, Wrakk will be waiting for the Unified Champion. They'll only be carrying what's supposed to belong to him. No one else has a more legitimate claim to that title so matter how much Noah Carmichael and Salvatore Scabbia want to bitch at each other.

Cue Haven interrupting the proceedings. Haven says that Wrakk can make a claim for the championship; Haven has a claim to Wrakk's soul. Haven notes that he, too, is upset with the state of things between himself and Wrakk. With the fact that neither of them will be competing for the Unified World Title at No Mercy, well that means that both of their schedules are cleared for that Sunday night. Haven proposes the two of them meet one-on-one at No Mercy to do something about that stalemate. Haven hopes Wrakks says yes because there's a whole lot of frustration that's been built up ever since SummerSlam and he's been looking for an excuse to unleash it.

Wrakk fires back and says that the only thing Haven is going to unleash is more whimpering and begging for mercy. Haven is a slow learner but that's OK because Wrakk is a benevolent teacher. There's only room for one monster at the top of the pack and everyone is looking at him right here in the middle of the ring. He may not have his Unified World Title but Wrakk has everything else that he needs to be the man to fear around here. Haven wants another round? He's got it. No Mercy continues to expand!

Second Match: Ziggy Styles and Chris Collins vs. Michael Haywood and Alexander Piero
Collins and Styles ponder how the two of them ended up having to deal with two of the biggest betas in the WWE right now. Haywood for being a drifter without his buddy and Piero for being a sorry sack of whipped snowflake tears because of what happened to Madison. Sooner or later the two of those crybabies are going to have to man up and take some responsibility. In the meantime, they can take an ass-whooping. This is fun and intense little match. Things break down at the end with Piero and Collins as the legal men. Piero tries suplexing Collins back into the ring from the apron but Ziggy trips him up causing Collins to fall across Piero into a pin attempt. Ziggy holds Piero's leg and the ref doesn't see it as he counts Piero's shoulders down giving the heels the win. Ziggy bails afterwards, wanting no more from Haywood. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Third Match: Eclypse vs. Dusk
Beforehand we get video of Eclypse making her way to the stage from the back where the Women's Champion Naomi Bailey tries to talk to her. Naomi wants to be out there watching Eclypse's back. This right here should be proof enough that things don't have to be strained between the two of them. Eclypse blows off this offer and says the only she wants from Naomi is her title match that she asked for. Eclypse continues on her way leaving Naomi flabbergasted.

That aside Dusk gets an extra little touch added to her entrance, rising from the below the stage, a la The Brood. Sorrow is of course with her and she plants him at ringside on a perch. The crowd is clearly behind Eclypse here in this battle between these two weirdos. Eclypse carries things here as the veteran and Dusk has herself a good showing. It can't be that simple though as Naomi ignores Eclypse's earlier decree and makes her way out as Eclypse is out on the floor. She goes to check on Eclypse but Eclypse isn't having any of it and shoves Naomi's arm away. Naomi takes offense to this and shoves Eclypse into the steps in view of the ref causing the DQ. Eclypse gets in Naomi's grill wanting to know what is her malfunction. Eclypse gives the champ a pretty hefty shove of her own after some words and Naomi takes that as her cue to perhaps back off for right now. DRAMA! ****1/2, 89% overall.

Backstage, Lisa Benton is accosted by Eddy Clash. Eddy brings up the fact that last week Lisa said that his team at Unforgiven was going to get rewarded and indeed they did get rewarded as all of them are going to have a chance at the Cruiserweight Title at No Mercy. But Eddy isn't a cruiserweight and he kind of felt left out. Doesn't he get some sort of compensation, too? Lisa apologizes and says that he's right. It was a bit of an oversight on her part but she's listening. What did Eddy have in mind? Eddy says that the rest of the guys are going to get to scratch their itch at No Mercy by taking on Michael Hotbody but there's an itch that Eddy has, too, that's also in Hotbody's camp. Eddy proposes a match between himself and Hotbody's right-hand goon, Zed Jones at No Mercy. Eddy's been wanting to show him what for ever since he first got in his face. Lisa is thrilled with the idea as she wants No Mercy to be packed. Consider the match sanctioned.

Luscious comes into the picture saying that she couldn't help but overhear. That's all well and good that Lisa is granting Eddy his match but consider it the only real victory she's going to get out of Michael Hotbody's camp. Just watch Michael Hotbody right now because he's got an announcement that's going to nuke Lisa's stupid plans for the Cruiserweight Title!

Fourth Match: Nigel Gallagher and The British Infection vs. The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody and Galino & Farnes
Hotbody gets on the mic and wants to address what Luscious was talking about earlier. Now he knows that Lisa Benton and her crooked and biased ways were looking forward to the Fatal Four-Way Elimination match at No Mercy being the ruin of Hotbody and his reign as champion. But sad news for everyone involved in this CRUEL CONSPIRACY against him! He's been working and consulting diligently with his CRACK LEGAL TEAM Galino & Farnes here and they have worked out a solution to this whole mess. Farnes takes the mic as Galino shows off a document to the crowd. Farnes explains that due to the severe physical danger that Michael Hotbody is in thanks to the irrational state of mind of the likes of Jordan Demiras, Ozzy Mandias, and Martyn LaSalle, all three of those men can not be trusted to be anywhere near their client. Therefore, the offices of Galino & Farnes have worked out this document that will be EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY. It is an all-encompassing restraining order against LaSalle, Mandias, and Demiras stating that neither of them are to come within 25 feet of Mr. Hotbody under penalty of arrest and incarceration! No, wait...they're not allowed to come within 2500 feet. So as you can all imagine this makes it impossible for Mr. Hotbody to defend his championship at No Mercy in the manner Lisa Benton proposed! Mr. Hotbody will address who he wants to face at a later date but in the meantime they all have business to attend to right now.

Business, indeed, as this an awesome trios match. The heels all keep looking around them making sure nobody gets close to Hotbody. The match ends with Hotbody using THE GAVEL OF DOOM on Exley and he gets the cheap pin for the victory. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Fifth Match: Noah Carmichael vs. Ronnie Costello
Brooke is furious at the fact that Noah Carmichael managed to sneak his way into the title match at No Mercy. How many times does Salvatore Scabbia have to prove himself in order to finally be rid of that teacher's pet? It's fitting that Carmichael only ended up with the second best time because ultimately that's what Carmichael is: he's was second best to Butch Fleming and he is most certainly second best to Salvatore Scabbia and it's all going to come to a head when Scabbia walks out of No Mercy THE RIGHTFUL Unified World Champion. Carmichael looks like he's still competing with some health issues but he gets through this well enough. He stalks Costello on the outside and that causes Brooke to try to get involved so he starts stalking her in response. Brooke backs off with fear and Carmichael is too fixated on her to notice Salvatore Scabbia who nails Carmichael, knocking him down and causing the DQ. Into the ring everyone goes and Carmichael falls victim to a 2-on-1 via Scabbia and Costello. ****1/2, 91% overall.

Sixth Match: Leah vs. Jenna Kyle vs. Bobbi Jo
The Lonely Girls let us know that they're still waiting on word from Lisa Benton regarding the titles and against who they'll be defending. This another fun and intense match but I'm going to blame the somewhat lower-than-usual rating on the charisma of Leah and Bobbi Jo. We've got Jenna to look at though, so that's something. Anyways, Bobbi KO's Jenna with the custom mic but Bonnie Beckham drags her out of the ring. Leah capitalizes by hitting a fallen Jenna with the Sultry Splash and gets the win.

Things look to get out of hand afterwards again but Lisa Benton comes out to get ahead of that. She's here to put to the rest the question of who will be the next challengers to the WWE Women's Tag Team Championship. The truth is both the Southern Belles and the Perfections make such strong cases and she would be denying the champions if she didn't pick the best possible competition. Therefore, at No Mercy the Lonely Girls will be defending the titles against BOTH the Southern Belles and The Perfections in a Triple Threat Tag match! Winners take all! We go to break with all 6 women trading barbs and stares. ****, 86% overall.

MAIN EVENT: WWE Intercontinental Championship
Seth Von Kamp (c) vs. Ryan Pattillo
This should be a good one. The announcers put over both guys and the crowd seems split. Seth has been fire ever since SummerSlam. Again I feel bad for Pattillo but what can you do? I'll tell you what Quentin McDaniels is going to do! He's going to take out his anger over losing out in the Beat the Clock challenge on these two guys. He runs down after one hell of a back and forth match and lays both men out for the double DQ. He decides he's not done and that the two men need to pay some more so he stomps away at the two of them and only leaves after hitting them both with the Great Depression. We go off the air with McDaniels in a huff. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Overall show rating: 88%

I'm as shocked as you are I was able to dump that show so quickly after the last one. So No Mercy, so far, looks like this:

WWE Unified World Title (vacant): Noah Carmichael vs. Salvatore Scabbia

WWE Women's Tag Team Titles: The Lonely Girls (c) vs. The Southern Belles vs. The Perfections

WWE Cruiserweight Title: The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody (c) vs. Jordan Demiras vs. Martyn LaSalle vs. Ozzy Mandias (Possibly canceled???)

WWE Unified Tag Team Titles: The Collective (c) vs. The Royal Effect

Haven vs. Wrakk

Zed Jones vs. Eddy Clash

More to come...obviously.

Was browsing the Other Workers section for some way to pay off the whole El Dandy thing if I could. It'd have been awesome if he were still in my database. I honestly can't remember if he ever was. I'll come up with something, I'm sure.

Oh, shit, he was!!! :lol:
https://i.imgur.com/pRLUa2p.png

Wow, he actually would've been 39 when the game initially came out too. But Dolph Ziggler and Drew McIntyre wouldn't have been a thing in 2002.

I'm sure I dicked around with the database.

If I remember correctly I was updating everyone's age to what they would have been in the current year when I had started. Remember, I had two timelines. The original one was the one I had given to you.

LOL oh shit I forgot about that, featuring ridiculous stuff like Goldberg still wrestling in 2021

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ONzpw5cL5Uo/maxresdefault.jpg

...shit

Truly I am the oracle of our time.

Thought I completely gave up on this, huh?

Superstars: October 18, 2040

Opening Match: Neil Quint vs. Bill Crockett
Oh, yeah, we're right back at it again! Let's have some of that Quint-Essential goodness to open the show and get things kicking. I'm going more relaxed here tonight but it's still going to be awesome...I hope. Anyways, Crockett serves his purpose here, making the new potential top superstar of the cruiserweight division look good. It's a fun opener to be sure. Quint works his magic yet again, setting Crockett up to be at his mercy and he comes off the top with the Quint-Essential Top Rope Manuever to score the pin and the victory. I can only picture great things ahead for this guy. ****1/4, 85% overall.

Second Match: Jason Sorola vs. Josh Turmell
Sorola gets on the mic and wants to explain himself and his actions on Raw in regards to the match against Shawn Dangerson. He figures that everyone should hear the truth about Shawn Dangerson's condition from him and nobody else because everyone else will just want to fluff it and make sure the blow isn't so bad because the fans are fragile snowflakes who can't handle the truth! Dangerson is going to be gone for a LONG time. Dangerson got exactly what was coming to him. Week in and week out, he and his bitch, Sophie Waters, would just chip away and chip away, bit by bit, piece by piece. And you want to know what happened? Sorola couldn't take it anymore! Sorola is the best the division has to offer and there's only so much B.S. he's going to take before he has to snap and put people in their place! Dangerson is in his proper place right now. The so-called great number one contender, destined to be the face of the Cruiserweight division is nothing more than some sap sucking his meals through a straw and watching the REAL face dominate like no other! Yeah, Dangerson won the series but that and 3 bucks will get him a cup of coffee at this point. The days of Jason Sorola putting up with crap are over because there's plenty more of what happened to Dangerson where that came from! So not surprisingly this is a match that's all about rebuilding Sorola. Dangerson, unfortunately, is going to have to take some time off for now. In the meantime, Sorola dominates this sucker and it's a doozy. He locks in the STF for the submission win. *****, 94% overall.

Third Match: Galino & Farnes vs. El Silencio and Isaac Wolff
Accompanying Galino & Farnes is their client, The New Age Intellectual Savior to the Masses, The 2031 Fulton County First Place Conga Award Winner, The Luscious Lover and Undefeated Steel Cage Master and REAL 2040 King of the Ring, The Supreme Submission Machine, Former WWE Cruiserweight Champion-Elect, the Cruiserweight Champion Michael Hotbody. Hotbody knows that all three of his so-called opponents are going to be fighting like hell to try to nullify the restraining order that was put out on them. The truth of the matter that they all need to realize is that order is actually for their own good! All that was going to happen if the fatal four-way match had gone forward was the inevitable cracks in their alliance and it wouldn't have been long before the three of them were sniping at each other, stumbling over themselves in a selfish frenzy! The restraining order also keeps the three of them away from Hotbody's impressive collection of muscle. Not just his own, but Zed Jones and the best legal counsel money can buy, Galino & Farnes. Hotbody only wants the best for Jordan Demiras, Martyn LaSalle, and Ozzy Mandias and he's just looking out for them. In time, all three of them will understand that it just wouldn't have been worth the trouble going forward with this match and that challenging Michael Hotbody is a fool's errand. Just take these two fine gentlemen over here who are daring to challenge Galino & Farnes. This match will be a fine example of what happens when you try to shoot for the moon and end up smacking into an asteroid. So with that out of the way it's fair to say this is a match that's all about making Galino & Farnes look good. Wolff ends up the face-in-peril as Hotbody runs distraction and gets the attention and ire of El Silencio. Sadly Wolff can't overcome the two-on-one and falls victim to SERIOUS INQUIRIES and eats the pin, giving the heels the win. Hotbody taunts El Silencio with the Cruiserweight Title belt as he takes his leave. ****1/2, 91% overall.

In-Ring Super Special Talky Time with Quinten McDaniels. "It seems like there's going to be a theme here tonight where there are certain people here that are having to explain themselves. Well if any of you people were smarter and could figure things out on your own, this wouldn't be necessary! It should be crystal clear to anyone with functioning gray matter why I did what I did to Seth Von Kamp. Ever since the City Slickers and then later the Integration went by the wayside, the door finally opened to me. Haven was out of the way. Butch Fleming was out of the way. I had myself a ticket to the main event of WrestleMania this year and it was only a matter of time before Noah Carmichael was out of the way! Everyone out here knows that my time has come to stand out on my own and be recognized as just what this company needs as its biggest star! I can outthink anybody! I can outwrestle anybody! I was on that road right back to the top in the Beat the Clock challenge but ONE SECOND, ONE GOD DAMN SECOND, was all the difference needed to take that away from me! And who was the person responsible for that? None other than that late-bloomer Seth Von Kamp! Oh, congrats and all that good stuff to you, Seth, on finally winning a God damn belt. BEEN THERE, DONE THAT! It's taken you almost a whole decade to get to where I am right now and I'm supposed to be impressed and then just take a backseat to you? Kiss my ass! One second isn't going to be my damn legacy and you can rest assured that I'm going to work my ass off to make sure that's never the case! Pain and suffering is what's on the menu for the near future, the best tools to help remind the stupid and lucky to mind themselves! So let's get down to the real nitty-gritty, Seth. You took from me, I'm going to take from you! You didn't make it into the main event for No Mercy either but that doesn't mean you're off the hook. You lace up those boots of yours, shake off that ass-kicking I gave you on Monday, and man up and accept my challenge! You and me, for the Intercontinental Title AT NO MERCY! With Fleming out of the way again and Carmichael walking around on borrowed time with no chance of surviving his championship match, the iron is hot again and I'm not going to let this opportunity slip..."

CUE THE MUSIC OF SETH VON KAMP INTERRUPTING QUINTEN'S TIRADE! The Intercontinental Champion himself comes on out and simply glares at Quinten for a good while, sizing him up. He ponders his possible courses of action before ultimately deciding to bum rush the ring and try to get him some of McDaniels. McDaniels seems a tad unprepared for this and decides discretion is the better part of valor and bails before things get physical between the two. Is Von Kamp accepting the challenge?

Fourth Match: Leah vs. Faith Connors
A question for another time as we have to move on to the business of the WWE Women's Tag Team Titles. Nathan Quinn starts things off by saying that he took a lot of criticism for taking a chance on someone like Leah. Leah was an unknown commodity when he began his quest to become one of the best managers in the business. He confesses that he had his eye on some of the more established talent out there. Jenna Kyle being one. Faith Connors being another one. But Nathan Quinn didn't become the name that he is today by simply playing things safe. He has one of the best minds for the business and he knew where his green pastures were. No Mercy is where those green pastures lay and he'll be in the corner of the team that's going to make the Lonely Girls nothing more than a footnote in history! Faith Connors can get a little bit of that right now! So this match rocks, as you'd expect. I probably shouldn't have doubted myself making Leah such a big deal from the beginning. Maybe she can win Rookie of the Year? Anyways, an awesome encounter ensues and Bobbi Jo of all people decides to make herself known. She yells insults at the two competitors until both Leah and Faith eventually decide to leave the ring and surround Bobbi, coming at her from opposite sides of her. She manages to avoid confrontation long enough for a double countout to be called. Both Leah and Faith turn to the ref in disgust and disappointment and Bobbi uses this chance to shove Leah into Faith. Faith gets the wrong idea and proceeds to attack Leah as Bobbi sneaks off. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Backstage we've got the number one contenders to the Unified Tag Team Titles, the Royal Effect, Moses McKay and King Kavovit. Moses is glad that Paul Andrews saw things their way and that he should be complimented on his ability to get Adam Hail and Simon Bennett to see things their way. After too long, things are finally starting to look up for the Royal Effect. They took out a bunch of old trash in the Play Pals so it's only appropriate that they take out more old trash and win the Unified Tag Team Titles. In fact, why don't the Royal Effect offer Bennett or Hail a chance to see what's in store for them come No Mercy? One of the Royal Effect versus one of the champs tomorrow night on SmackDown!. Get ready for a glimpse into your futures!

Fifth Match: Eddy Clash vs. L.A. Xander
Eddy needs more mileage under his belt. More wins, too, as he heads into No Mercy for his match against Zed Jones. It's a Battle of Hosses! Not this match, though. Eddy dominates pretty well here and LAX falls victim to the Thunderstrike to give Eddy the win. No time for celebrating as Zed Jones comes running down, ready to get him some. Eddy is too inexperienced and too tired here, though, to put up too much of a fight and unfortunately gets powerbombed through the announce table. Zed stands tall and beats his chest as we go to break. ****1/2, 90% overall.

More In-Ring Super Special Talky Time but this time it's the WWE Women's Champion, The Queen of Queens Naomi Bailey. Naomi is glad to welcome us back from break because she always deserves all of the attention as the Women's Champion. "What I DON'T deserve is all of the ridicule and guilt-tripping all of you people are trying to throw at me! You peasants are all out and about calling for me to do the unthinkable and get me to fight my own flesh and blood! Eclypse is the closest thing I have to a sister! You don't just throw something like that away for something as trivial as a fight over a belt! But I probably should expect something like that from you ungrateful savages! You people would probably stab your own mother in the back if it meant getting ahead. Or maybe you'd do it just for jollies because that's the kind of sick people you are! You have no respect for family and my drama isn't here for your amusement! You people should be ashamed of yourselves demanding that I fight my cousin! I am a queen! I am THE queen! I refuse to lower myself to your level and give in to a selfish request. More to the point, if Eclypse really deserved the Women's Championship, she'd already be the champion! The better woman between the two of us has already been decided just by the fact that I'm standing here, the Queen of Queens, STILL the Women's Champion! So I am issuing a royal decree that no more talk about this proposed match shall continue! I don't want to hear about it anymore! I'm your queen and I expect respect from all of my subjects!"

Cue Eclypse who makes her way out onto the stage. The cheers for her are getting louder as the days go on. Eclypse has a mic and addresses Naomi. "Nothing, I do mean NOTHING, has been decided between you and me. If our bond is as strong as you claim, then something like a simple contest shouldn't be the thing that destroys it. Something like me taking that Women's Title from you shouldn't be a problem. Understand, Naomi, I'm not one of your 'subjects'. You're walking roads and paths that I paved long before you ever got here. I don't demand respect from anyone. I already have it. The only person that seems to be alone on that branch of not giving me any respect is you. Now I'm not saying I'd be thrilled with beating some respect out of you or that I'd be glad to leave you broken in the name of reclaiming the Women's Title, but I know that I can beat you and the more you avoid this, the more you betray yourself."

"Eclypse, don't fall for this nonsense that these people are feeding you. You are your own woman. I do respect you! You don't need the championship to earn my respect! You're asking for the two of us to head down a direction from which there's no coming back. I don't want to have to hurt you and have that hanging over us for the rest of our lives. We can just walk away from this right now and be a family. We can still be a team. Every other woman in that locker room is just loving this because they know that if we weren't united, they'd be able to have their run of the place. You and I OWN this division, Eclypse. Forget about these people and forget about any bad blood that's been between us these last few weeks. Let's not do anything that we're going to regret."

Eclypse merely narrows her eyes at Naomi for a bit and then proceeds to raise her mic. "Like I said before, I already have regrets. This isn't over." And with that, Eclypse turns around and walks away leaving Naomi dejected.

Sixth Match: Jordan Demiras vs. Zachary Vale
Martyn LaSalle is on commentary. He talks about how he and Jordan Demiras and Ozzy Mandias have been wanting to take a look at that alleged restraining order from Michael Hotbody but strangely nobody seems to want to produce a copy. They all suspect shenanigans. Anyways, this is all about Jordan Demiras looking good. LaSalle makes comments here and there about Jordan's skills and what it's been like working with him these last few weeks. The announce team points out that Demiras would be an impediment to LaSalle if the fatal four-way match manages to actually happen. LaSalle says that it's not an issue because he's better than Demiras anyway. Hotbody's ass belongs to LaSalle and LaSalle is going to through anyone to take that Cruiserweight Title away from him. Demiras picks up the win here after an Axe Kick leading to the pin. He trades glances with LaSalle as he celebrates. ****1/2, 91% overall.

More backstage action as we get Michael Haywood on the mic being asked about how things are faring now that's he's essentially on his own. Michael responds that he's not alone. He's still got the support of the people who, just like him, are eager to see the teeth of douches like Ziggy Styles get kicked in. Partner or no partner, faction or no faction, Michael Haywood has always been about delivering something the people will talk about. Ziggy Styles is the latest in a long line of arrogant johnny-come-latelies that are due a slap in the face. People need to understand that the break up of the Hunters wasn't the worst thing that could happen to Michael Haywood. The worst thing would be someone like Ziggy Styles getting the better of him.

MAIN EVENT: Noah Carmichael vs. Justin Mitchell
Brooke and Randy Ellis are with Justin here and she gets on the mic in order to get her ducks in a row. She realizes that she's in the trenches now. Noah Carmichael may be wounded and reckless but he's still dangerous. He's not completely out of it just yet. But that's why now, more than ever, she needs all of her troops on the same page. She and Salvatore Scabbia came SO CLOSE to that Unified World Title before it got snatched away and it can't happen again! She gives Justin and Randy a pretty intense glare as she warns of consequences for anyone that might screw this all up for her and Scabbia. Carmichael still looks pretty rough but he toughs it out here, despite the odds. Carmichael starts the comeback and things look grim for Justin. Brooke insists that Randy try to do something to help out but that leads to an argument between the two. Noah and Justin fight to the outside and Noah accidentally sends Justin into Randy which pushes him into Brooke. Back into the ring they go as Brooke is insulted. Justin grounds Noah but has to put up with Brooke on the apron yelling at him. That's enough to allow Noah to recover and hit the Quick Draw on Justin to score the pin. Brooke is furious but Randy and Justin don't seem too eager to try to console her. Noah has successfully BUILT MOMENTUM for No Mercy. ****1/2, 90% overall.

Overall show rating: 89%