"capital knockers"

I saw Creep. It was real good. I had a few smallish issues. I feel like when he was drugged he should have been drugged. Also, where was the sister? Why didnt she come for that guy. And at the end, no blood spatter?

I honestly didnt think the end was going to happen. The movie was somewhat slow paced, but you couldnt tell because the creepiness kept increasing and making you feel like it's more fast paced than it is. I thought it at the end he was just gonna scare him lol. I dont feel like the camera guy did enough to stop that shit.

Overall, I'd give it a 7.5/10

Watch the sequel man. It's good.

By good, he means you get an extended look at Mark Duplass's dick.

I know what all of you are thinking and no I'm not kidding, Guru Dave loves penis.

Just finished Creep 2. I liked it. Mark Duplass penis stole the show. I was hoping she would kill him and take over or something. I kinda puked when she got naked and her underarms were not shaved. That was actually more disgusting than Mark Duplass erect 3 inch penis. Oh yah and Baby Peach Fuzz.

I give it 7/10

IT Chapter 2 - 6/10

IT Chapter 2 - 8/10

Bill Hader is the MVP of this movie. Funnier than the first film but with a surprisingly emotional finish. Takes a bit to get going but once everyone is battling IT things get really good. Would say the first film is better overall but this also good.

Yesterday - 8.5/10

Relatively "simple" movie, but I enjoyed it a lot....

Its on my "as soon as i see it streaming" list

IT: Chapter 2
7/10

It is admittedly not as captivating as the first one. And it feels a bit "been there, done that". Pennywise was of course awesome. And the adult cast, after taking a decent amount of time to get established, is also great.

It's still very enjoyable, with an absolutely brutal opening scene. The flashbacks are mixed in more than I thought they'd be, but were enjoyable nonetheless.

I do wish there was more Pennywise. Feels like he wasn't in it as much as I remember in the first one. Still, it's a solid sequel that I think puts out a strong finish.

Solo: A Star Wars Story- 5/10


If member berries was a movie. This film would barely make sense if you hadnt seen 4, 5 and 6. This film doesnt do callbacks instead it attempts to harness nostalgia as a plot and fails to form any identity of its own.

The crime of thinking anyone wanted Han Solo without Ford does not go unpunished as whats his face and Glover both come off as doing shit impressions of better actors.

Action continuously occurs for the sake of action. I find it tedious.

On a technical level the film works but im left powerfully unmoved by anything they tried to do in this.

Thank you. I will not watch it.

If its free and youre bored go for it. Otherwise...yeah skip it.

I thought it was alright. Not great by any means, but.... I'd like a sequel, if only to deal with the loose plot threads they clearly set for sequels. I know it ain't gonna happen though.

Yeah 0% on that one.

0 stars.

I couldn't even finish it. I have no idea why this has a 96% fresh rating other than it's got every type of gender minority in it thus giving this a bad rating would cause the reviewer to be crucified and no longer allowed to have a Twitter account.

The two main characters are not funny and not protagonists I'm rooting for. I don't hate them or anything but being smart without any other really redeeming qualities isn't a compelling study of character. How am I supposed to root for someone who flaunts getting into Yale, then is crushed to find out shes not the only one going to an elite tier college? That's an asshat, not a lovable awkward high schooler.

Seriously. Had to turn it off. Couldn't even see it through. I want my 5 bucks back.

The way this movie blows itself over it's own virtue signaling is very WWE. "Look at us being inclusive! Aren't we progressive af?"

Why am I not surprised? I thought it was a sweet movie, Franklin.

Sounds like it starred Ellen Page and Brie Larson.

Detective Pikachu - 6/10

Dave, one of these sweet, brave and bold heroes thinks shes better than you because shes going to Yale. Shell think shes better than you until you tell her you always question your sexuality at which point she will try to be your best friend. How is that sweet?

She's a "plastic" except that the value that she places on her social status is college and not high school.

Hahahahahaha!

Before Sunset 8/10

I love the interplay between Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. I think I enjoyed this film more than Before Sunrise, which I saw several years ago; I definitely found Julie Delpy utterly charming in both films. I'll probably watch Before Midnight in the near future.

It's sad that you're brushing away a good movie because it is too progressive for your taste.

From the sound of its so open minded its brain fell out

You've missed the point.

I'm sure there are plenty of vids on pornhub of dudes sucking their own dicks for 90 mins. I wasn't interested in that. I was hoping to see a thoughtful coming of age story and instead I got Rick Rolled to a guy sucking his own dick.

:roll:

It went out of it's way to show which side of the political aisle they were on and just hit the audience over the head with it. No subtlety. No nuance. Nothing to add to the plot or character depth. That amounts to trying to cover up lazy writing by tricking the audience into thinking that the movie is good because the people making it are now pre displaced in the category that many would place themselves in and relating to the filmmakers not by the material in the movie but by being in the Hilary Clinton N Friends camp. I think that's a pretty valid criticism.

Also, shes a cunt for being all high and mighty about getting into an ivy league school then tearing down her own accomplishments because others also got into good schools. Maybe she got into those schools because she went to a good school where everyone is smart. Maybe a rising tide lifts all boats and her accomplishments look that much better because of all those stupid cis partiers and not in spite of them. Hm?

But whatever. "It was too progressive for you" is a nice catch all when you can't explain away the criticism of the subject.

There are LGBTQ themed movies that suck. Sorry.

I understand where you're coming from. It certainly doesn't deserve the RT score. But even with the ultra progressiveness (the Malala bs), it didn't make me laugh any less in the theater. I cut them some slack since it's the director's first movie...some of the edits were atrocious.

If there's one thing that struck a chord with me was the friendship. Sometimes people become selfish even without realizing what they're doing. Once the safety net is gone and you're on your own...nobody to comfort you all the time. Also I found them being bitter and jealous about their grades to be very amusing. It happens a lot in real life when you're in a competitive environment.

That being said, I'd never compare it to Superbad. It's not even in the same league. I had similar feelings about Blockers.

The protagonist is a teenager and certainly not one dimensional. I for one was glad that she didn't have a vanilla personality. She had real emotions and a visceral reaction after learning that everyone else was also going to a good school. She started doubting herself and reconsidering her priorities. She's flawed like everyone else.

Hey Dave, try not to be such a chore.

Seanny, I’ll kick your stupid face into oblivion.

That's something that bitch in the movie would say to you until she realized you were brown. Then she'd try to adopt you and show you off to all her friends.

Stop being so gross, Franklin.

I really love you two

The only reason I don't threaten to inflict physical pain on Frank Drebin is because of Mrs. Drebin. She's the only reason between my foot and his ass.

Why are you so scared of Frank's wife?

Why are you not?

Work on your patter

Going to watch “Dude, Where’s My Car?” tonight.

Never Hike Alone - 7/10

I thought this was good, don't think I have ever thought that of a 'fan film' before. Recommended to horror fans and (of course) Friday the 13th fans.


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The commentary track is quite a time capsule.

Any movie that has a gender pronoun like "dude" in the title isn't woke enough for me.

Once Upon A Time IN Hollywood - 7/10. It was good, and was kinda fun but enjoyed other Tarantino films better.

Just watched "Glass"... Very unimpressive but not outright bad. The ending was hugely anticlimactic and strange but it was all over the place as a whole. 2/4 if forced to rate it. I would have to admit that I ended up surfing the net rather than watching properly towards the end.

James McAvoy doing umpteen characters is very tiring and sort of, just a bit incredibly fucking stupid.
Also the secret society thing is mental and pointless, I hated that.

I caught John Wick 3 the other day too, that started well but got caught up in a couple of very off-putting performances which really hacked into the fun and threw it off course.

Easily the least entertaining Wick.

Was probably still a 3/4 though, the opening was tits.

Emelia - 6/10

Gerald’s Game - 7/10

The Babysitter -7/10

The Babysitter is great and the only good film McG has ever made or likely ever will.

My girlfriend is in The Babysitter. Her name is Samara Weaving. We've been together for a while. Nothing too serious.

Yeah mine's in it too. Her name is Bella Thorne and she's actually in need of a good scrub. That's how dirty she is.

Her fingernails were kinda dirty.

Ya i know Bella. Samara brought her over a few nights ago and I ate the vagina scum build up from under her fingernails while she dribbled my balls with her tongue. Really nice girl.

Consider yourself lucky that my real life fantasy woman just got in touch

I watched this and everything was pretty interesting until the " eclipse " scene.

It was very difficult to get through that. The movie does pick up towards the end...

The Endless - 9/10

It has been referred to in glowing terms many times here. I'm surprised you missed that.

It Chapter 1 7.5/10

After a lacklustre beginning, it improves as the film progresses. I don't know if I'll see the second film in the cinema or just wait until it is available to rent on Prime.

There's no "It Chapter 1". It's just called "It".

That make you feel big did it, Dave?

My penis grew 3 inches.

Great, now you have one nearly as big as Chyna's clitoris.

That's where you're wrong.

It does say at the end of the film "IT Chapter One"

Oh my! Could it be?

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Detective Pikachu 7/10

Between Two Ferns: The Movie - 7/10

That’s Pokémon: Detective Pickachu.

That's Guru Dave: A smartass cunt.

Ad Astra - 8/10

Rambo: Last Blood - 3/5. It was pretty much what I expected. I didn't go for a solid plot or good acting, I went to see Stallone mess people up, and to that end it delivered.

The Sisters Brothers deserves a real review. One of the best westerns of the modern era.

Quality film.

The Sisters Brothers - 3.5/4

Presenting it as anything other than a Western was a terrible error of judgement. I was expecting a dark comedy adventure based on how it was packaged and sold but it's classic Western all the way. It's quite off key in a very pleasant way, there are uneasy moments galore which can turn either way and I was enamoured with the style of the story and the choices made in the cast.

Riz Ahmed and Jake Gyllenhaal stood out as strongly as Reilly and Phoenix in the support but their tale is so beautifully told that I really think they could have had a teeny bit more screen time just because it is powerful stuff and it sticks with me, as they do as characters. Reilly was especially likeable in his role as the guardian, partner and brother of Phoenix's hot headed and cold blooded hunter killer. Phoenix, who is now so incredibly talented as an actor that I can hardly even tell he's a real person anymore, becomes more endearing despite every act of brutality and stupidity in the story.

I really loved it.

Lincoln - 7/10

Ad Astra - 3.75/5

The last three I've watched:

Life After Beth - Really enjoyed it
1922 - It was alright..kinda boring
Child's Play (new one) - mehh

The Land of Steady Habits - 6/10

Flags of Our Fathers 7/10
Letters from Iwo Jima 7/10

I think the performances were far stronger in Letters, the film structure and storyline were also much more Interesting.

American Made 7.5/10

I was thoroughly impressed by American Made. It makes "Blow" look utterly mediocre.

John Wick 3 - 4.5 out of 5

The repugnant bald dyke in Wick 3 is a good visual representation of what is wrong with the film.

Just tried to watch The Florida Project. I can't sit through another pointlessly ugly, crass film that celebrates the deadbeat and disgusting in a way that suggests everybody deserves the benefit of the doubt.

It's an impressively awful film. Rarely are so many of my buttons pressed at the same time by anything but the combination of broke, scummy and bratty with an unforgivable, saccharine optomistic silver lining to it is quite the handful for me to endure.

Don' t make shit like this unless everyone burns in a fire at the end. It's what they deserve for being shitheads.

Didn't care about her looks but she did come off as the weakest/worst character. Maybe it was just her acting but she felt a bit out of place compared with the film's tone.

Also wouldn't be surprised if the film set some sort of record for most people attacked in the crotch since there were a ton of those throughout it.

She was a hideously ugly fit for a traditionally male role. Prepare for lots of that in the near future.

Seanny needs to get with the woke programme.

If it weren't for Seanny's peculiar fixation on them, I wouldn't have realized how unattractive they are.