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WWE is terrible with their development though so that's a blessing. He's much better off doing what he has and waiting until WWE brings him in as Eli Drake instead of WWE forming him into whatever they would have wanted him to be.
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He is; we aren't.
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Trying to formulate a theory that Hulk Hogan was actually a heel through his entire WWF tenure. A thread:</p>— BostonNooga (@BostonNooga) <a href="https://twitter.com/BostonNooga/status/987023798745600001?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2018</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Hogan vs. Andre: Hogan holds Andre down for years, then rubs it in Andre's face when he gets a bigger trophy than Andre. Takes greatest offense when Andre rips Hogan's cross necklace off, because Hogan views himself as a Messianic figure.</p>— BostonNooga (@BostonNooga) <a href="https://twitter.com/BostonNooga/status/987023800834379777?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Hogan vs. Savage: As open-and-shut as it gets. Hogan steals the limelight in Savage's crowning moment, then spends the next year actively trying to sleep with his "friend's" woman behind his back. Savage only snaps when Hogan takes Liz to a secluded room and lays her on a bed.</p>— BostonNooga (@BostonNooga) <a href="https://twitter.com/BostonNooga/status/987023802713374720?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Hogan vs. Earthquake: Hogan is a climate-change denier, feuds with the human embodiment of Earth's changing state. When science (the gravity of Earthquake sitting on his chest) weighs upon him, Hogan takes his ball and goes home. Also, Hogan hates Canada (see also D.Bravo feud)</p>— BostonNooga (@BostonNooga) <a href="https://twitter.com/BostonNooga/status/987023806853152768?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Great examples added by friends here: Hogan literally yanking victory and a title away from Sid at RR92 when Sid legally eliminated him, and Hogan's shameful spot-stealing performance in the wake of Warrior winning at WM6.</p>— BostonNooga (@BostonNooga) <a href="https://twitter.com/BostonNooga/status/987036109631836160?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> First tweet has several more cases presented as evidence of Hogan never being a good guy in the WWF. |
The Luster brother. You can see the lust in his eyes!
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Who the hell is Eli Drake?
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Some guy that Creature of the night creams his panties over, and will wish Death on once he makes it to NXT somehow
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Simple Fan is Creature of the Night?
He was the impact/global/tna champion for a little bit. A cheap copy of the Rock but with Hogan orange skin. |
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I had this inflicted on me so now all of the rest of you have to suffer.
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/vYiNUOPvQMI" frameborder="0" allow="autoplay; encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe> |
I just read that the next Impact on Twitch special is called Penta Does Iowa and it's on Cinco de Mayo...
https://media.giphy.com/media/MwDoyp8eii0Mg/200w.webp |
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Glad they stopped doing those 'Comedy' segments.
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That was pretty damn funny.
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Here’s some breaking news! <a href="https://twitter.com/BookerT5x?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@BookerT5x</a> will be back on <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RAW?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#RAW</a> commentary this Monday! <a href="https://t.co/poPCdvgxlK">pic.twitter.com/poPCdvgxlK</a></p>— Brad Gilmore (@bradgilmore) <a href="https://twitter.com/bradgilmore/status/987324641843740672?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2018</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> SHUCKY DUCKY QUACK QUACK. ILLEGAL TACTICS. BRING ON DRUNK UNCLE BOOKER |
Unless this means the commentary team will be Cole / Coach / Booker because Graves is being locked in to Smackdown.
Who are we kidding? That won't happen. There can only be one black guy at a time. |
I really hope it's a one-off thing.
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I saw someone wearing a Revival T-Shirt today and it made me think of STD.
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It also made me think of their theme and also how their T-shirt looks a bit silly with "JUST FISTS" written on it.
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The Revival's "Just Fists" thing really needs context all the time.
Without it, it all comes across as sounding "a bit wrong". |
Especially when it's on the ass end of their trunks.
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Map of who was the biggest stars during the Territory era of wrestling although text is a bit blurry.
https://i.redd.it/jyl1y5q7v0t01.jpg |
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Looks like it is indeed Coach getting replaced, and Vince has been taking some cues from his wife's boss. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">What? Where did you hear that? Do you know something I don’t know? <a href="https://t.co/lIR17aYS5G">https://t.co/lIR17aYS5G</a></p>— Jonathan Coachman (@TheCoachrules) <a href="https://twitter.com/TheCoachrules/status/987365661771837440?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Apparently not. <a href="https://twitter.com/BookerT5x?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@BookerT5x</a> is telling the truth. He will be doing commentary Monday. But I have a feeling it’s ALL for a good reason. <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/vision?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#vision</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/crosspromotion?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#crosspromotion</a>. <a href="https://twitter.com/WorldLongDrive?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@WorldLongDrive</a> <a href="https://t.co/uXjzsXPiqx">https://t.co/uXjzsXPiqx</a></p>— Jonathan Coachman (@TheCoachrules) <a href="https://twitter.com/TheCoachrules/status/987379365611622402?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2018</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script> |
I love Booker, but Coach was really growing on me. What's up here?
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Zelina Vega might be the sexiest woman on the planet.
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Although David Otunga was "out filming a movie for a few weeks" and that movie has been filming for almost two years now. |
Really hope Booker tries to cram in every one of his nonsensical catch phrases in the three hour span.
"SHUCKY DUCKY 'DIS GUY RIGHT HERE KEEPS USIN' THEM JASON JORDAN ILLEGAL TACTICS. DEFINITELY GOIN' IN MY FAVE FIVE" |
I can't wait to hear his grunts after nearly every move.
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But seriously, his grunts are probably the worst thing about him.
I'll probably go "grunt counting" when I watch Raw and report back with the numbers. |
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So we know Noid is a big fan, who else can explain Eli Drake?
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I'm a fan of him like I'm a fan of herpes and hemorrhoids. I hate him with such a preoccupation that I've studied up on his career to work out how he could possibly be so bad. Someone joked that he must have fucked my missus or something, but I want him in my life so bad I would welcome him to make a rational enemy out of me.
Fuck Eli Drake and anyone that supports his career. He might be a nice guy in real life or whatever. I don't wish harm on him. I just want him out of a field of entertainment I want to enjoy, but can't, because I know that somewhere, somehow, money that could go to feeding someone with talent is being siphoned to that hammy hack. He's been wrestling since 2002. He has as much experience as Shinsuke fucking Nakamura. There is no reason that a a 16-year veteran of the business sucks so bad. He's 35 years old and looks like a balding accountant that moonlights as a stripper in his spare time because his singing career hasn't taken off, because he fucking sucks. We all know losers like Eli Drake, because we all know fucking losers. That TNA made him a World Champion is indicative of why they are completely irrelevant as a wrestling promotion and why no one will ever take them seriously, and their perpetual existence is a running gag. The thing is, I'm sure he tries hard and has improved since I saw him. That is the saddest part. He's not lazy or phoning it in. This is what he can muster. That is what 16 years of trying to be a professional wrestler have amounted to. He doesn't completely fall over his feet and tries to cut a promo like The Rock and fails. Congratu-fucking-lations. Eli Drake is the uncle that laughs at his own jokes and slaps people on the back, spilling their drink onto their shirt and calls them "champ," but has a thousand-yard stare because deep-down they are miserable because they know that their entire personality is a propped-up lie. Fuck Eli Drake. Best of luck in his future endeavors or whatever. If WWE signs him, and they probably will, I will 100% boycott whatever show he is on, even if Shinsuke Nakamura and AJ Styles are in the main event and Becky Lynch does hardcore porn on it. I will not illegally stream content he appears on. I wouldn't deliver the reel to a dying child if it was their last wish should he appear on it. He is the dirt worst and I dare someone to try and defend his position in the wrestling business. I fucking dare them. |
I would rather get fucked by an automated dildo-thrusting machine whilst watching "Punjabi Prison: A Collection" followed by "The Best of Jinder Mahal" than listen to one fucking cunty Eli Drake promo. Vince Russo is more endearing as a television personality than him. He has less charisma than expired carton of lactose-free milk. An inanimate carbon rod would be a bigger draw. Zach Gowen taking a shit would be more compelling, should they manage to get footage of that and play it instead of whatever the fuck Eli Drake is trying to do. I have thought about digging into my savings and making an offer on TNA just so I can close it up and no one has to see him anymore, and his family no longer feel compelled to provide Impact with 40% of their viewing audience.
So yes...I guess you could say I am a simple fan. |
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